- Member Since 14th Jun, 2015
- offline last seen 6 hours ago
Ebonyglow
I do be writing. You do be reading
Ebonyglow
Joined 14th Jun, 2015 ·
Offline
Sequels1
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Ebonyglow · 15k words · 561 32 · 14k views
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i like it
Can’t wait to see where this goes!
She seems so happy! Anon is a really good friend and I wish I knew more people like him.
Please write the next chapter soon, I can't imagine how badly Mayor Mare really really needs stress relief!
Oh shit
Yep, he's dead.
Oh my, the premise sounds good~ I bet that Anon and Starlight are going to become really close friends after this~
the cutie mark gimmick works so fucking well, 10/10
can someone cast this on me??
Always nice to see Starlight get more lovin.
Man, gettin' deja vu here.
Beautiful, with mind control too no less
Pretty decent read, a short one
A fascinating concept...
c.tenor.com/PMvCf9_msvAAAAAC/spongebob-patrick.gif
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There is going to be more
Don’t worry
This Anon's abject perviness makes me feel attacked.
This definitely has potential! Mind control harem wish fulfillment is a genre I can get behind - and the fact that the Mane Six are away should open the door to rarer waifus joining the herd!
My one hope is you find ways to differentiate the mares even as their cutie marks are homogenized under a shared purpose. The risk with stories like this is you lose sight of the adorable traits that made the mares worth mindwiping in the first place. Starlight's eager backslide into cutie mark-related villainy is a good sign though.
When's the sequel where Pinkie straight up murders him for breaking the Pinkie Promise?
You shifted from past tense to present tense several times, which took me out of the story. You should probably go over the text again, or have someone look it over for you if that's a frequent issue for you.
Also, this apostrophe doesn't belong here:
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I had several people go over the story.
Perhaps you could show me some examples of where you see it? I originally wrote this as a greentext so adapting it from first person to third person was a hassle. I wouldn’t be shocked if some mistakes made their way through.
Thanks for the typo find, I’ll amend that.
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This may not be all of them, but this should give you an idea of what I mean.
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Ah, yeah.
That's inevitable I suppose, since I had to adapt and edit the entire story from first person to third.
I can assure you that this isn't a common thing with my writing though. I appreciate your suggestions, though I won't need them, since this isn't a frequent issue that I face.
Thank you again for the highlighted parts though! I went ahead and fixed them, so I appreciate the heads up!
I really like this story, and can’t wait to see where it goes.
L O V E D this. Hoping for more Shenanigans soon.
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Their will be more chapters, also anon can just mind control pinkie.
Good stuff right here.
Wait a minute... I just realized...
THIS GOES AGAINST THE PRINCIPLES OF COMMUNISM!
Mr. Anon. You, good sir, are now marked for detainment. You shall be sent to horny gulag for rehabilitation.
Do not resist.
Absolutely delicious fic. I look forward to seeing more in this series!
lovely
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Pinkie'll find a way to get him alone.
mind fuckery is a go!!!!
You've once again delivered a fantastic story. Can't wait for more from you!
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Aww thank you!
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now you're just being nice and you know it
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All the mind fuckery!
I kinda expected Pinkie to show up at that very moment.
Too late, the SCP already knows:
derpicdn.net/img/view/2013/8/24/409234.png
A shame that this story ended as soon as it did.
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I’m literally working on the sequel rn lmao
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c.tenor.com/Gmmc51gh8EwAAAAC/mr-burns-excellent-mr-burns.gif
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More is coming
I was finally able to read this one to the end~ It was so hot~ Thank you for making this for us~
I want to hate this for betrayal of trust reasons, but...
Good story.
I feel like maybe you don't know what the word abstract means?
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Nah I do, but there’s likely cases where I misuse it in this story since I wrote it up in a day and proofread it once
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both times it was used in the story (the language of the spell, and in reference to ponies' breast placement) were incorrect
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Yeah, reading over it myself right now and I definitely did. I’ll fix em when I get home. Guess that’s what happens when you write up a fic in a day haha
Somepony left that book there on purpose, and I feel like I'm the only one who cares.
Here from the sequel, Not normally big on the whole mind control thing, but I'm a sucker for mare mayor so I had to read this for context. Thumbs up!
But seriously who left the book there?
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It’ll be explained in time ~
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Thank you! I was almost afraid it just appeared there for the sake of convenience. Now I have something to look forward to!
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all the elements in my stories have a purpose, don’t you worry!