Part 3/3: Crazy Cooking!
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Canterlot
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Chibi Moon busily worked in her study, having taken the precaution of moving her build project to a rental studio away from the castle and school. Partially to allow privacy and ensure her Sensei didn't catch on, and partially in case things went south and she had to try several times. Clad in a chef's hat and apron, she gathered her materials together, all the delicious foodstuffs and ingredients she had amassed so far, all set atop a scroll with Neighponese and Equestrian runes written upon it. After very carefully, and more than a bit awkwardly, putting Pinkie Pie's tail hairs near the surge crystal Xenilla had given her, she backed up and prepared. Biting her tongue as she concentrated after downing another mug of coffee, Chibi Moon's horn ignited and she grinned.
Time to make a cake!
It took a few extra jaunts to some other very strange worlds, some of which she only had a faded memory of, to get back to where she started. Frankly she was very confused on how she ended up where she did, but she was an heiress to a 1,000-year lineage of magical warriors, living in a country ruled by two immortal diarchs with chimeric bodies of different races, and was the apprentice to a gigantic unicorn who was actually a 100-meter tall, radioactive, nigh-indestructible, mutated dinosaur. Normality and questioning the fantastic were simply not in her vocabulary. She didn’t lose sleep over how it all worked, nor should anyone else either.
There were far more important things to worry about, like the gathered ingredients before her. Mariner “Chibi” Moon observed all that she had gathered around, near and far with a studious mind. True, some of them certainly looked way more edible in a cake than others, but the spell should take care of all that. She certainly was aiming high but there was some comfort in maybe not being the best a star chef could bake. If her sensei could withstand spewing out high-temperature streams of radioactive plasma, she figured nothing she could possibly cook up would be so bad as to give Godzilla a stomachache.
Setting out all the ingredients upon the enchanting rune she had chalked into the ground, with the scroll from her homeland’s magical incantation mixed with that of archaic equestrian magic in hoof. Chibi put her hooves together and cracked her wrist, biting her tongue as magic charged up across her horn. To make it all come together, no matter how diverse the ingredients and how far-flung their origins were, the spell was to make them all come together into the best cake they could be. With a little bit of wincing and befuddlement, she levitated the removed tail hairs of Pinkie Pie, her volunteer chef, from the bag they were in. The moment they were free, the hairs pushed back out to the exact same shape they were in life upon her body, making it look like she had literally just picked her tail up and hoofed it over to Chibi.
To be fair, that was exactly what she had done.
Chibi placed the tail hair upon the ingredients and the marking on the ground, before concentrating with every ounce of focus she had. She drew up not only her own magic, but the inherent magic granted to her as her mother’s successor. She was to be the Lunar Guardian one day, and after a little pep talk she was feeling more confident about that. Confident enough that she intentionally drew upon the fragmentary abilities the Silver Crystal had granted upon her to amplify her magic further.
To make all come together in the perfect sequence. That was what the spell was for, and that is exactly what she had to do. The luminance took hold of all of the ingredients in a uniform brightness, sinking it together in a uniform solid mass of light. She saw it condense into a vaguely barrel shape, before shifting into a more layered appearance of decreasingly-sized cylinders that composed the iconic cake shape. Chibi’s jaw began to drop and a gasp as she marveled at how beautiful it was becoming! True, it wasn’t necessarily to the standard of a superb baker, no spell could ever replicate that kind of talent, but this was meant to be from her and this was far and away superior to anything she could personally make with her own hooves. She wasn’t Auntie Jupiter after all, but this wasn’t at all shabby!
It was towering, it was layered with beautiful blues and pinks, it was-… standing up? Glowing eyes in the same coloration as the surge crystal Xenilla had given her snapped open on the trunk, a facsimile of a toothy maw appearing with the same hues as Pinkie Pie’s tail.
Chibi Moon’s jaw further dropped
The cake almost unfolded upon itself, like it had been compacted into a shape or was some kind of animal that curled up to go to sleep and was getting back up upon awakening. It grew in size until reaching roughly the same height as Princess Luna, clearly emulating an equine shape while still sporting all the hallmarks of being created from confectionery. A mane of pink frosting flipped back and separated into two giant twintails that resembled Chibi’s mother’s infamous “meatball tails”, as toothy ‘lips’ split in a manic cackle.
“I AM Kooky Keki! For too long cake has been consumed by all, and now I take my sweet revenge!”
“Whaaaat?” Chibi Moon squeaked at the entity that literally just called itself ‘Crazy Cake’ in Neighponese, as the cake monster’s horn ignited and shot out a shockwave that ruptured the room.
The future Lunar Guardian flopped on the ground of the ruined warehouse in a heap, rump over head.
“Deeeef!.... Ooouuoow,” she groaned, blowing her tail out of her face just as her ancestral magic scroll billowed through the air and fell upon her snout. Half-covered in frosting as it was, she couldn’t ignore what was written upon it now inches from her eyes. In very fine print on the back was… a decades-old warning label.
-‘Warning: Do not mix this spell with caffeine, caffeine is evil and will make it a monster.- Mariner Moon’-
Chibi Moon could mentally feel the white noise between her ears. Both at her own impulsiveness leading to her not reading the label, her mother’s meatball headed idea to put the label on the back, wondering what exactly her mother got up to in her youth that made her feel the need to put a label like that on, as well as the very high probability this sort of blunder was genetic.
Quickly recalculating back to the matter at hand she looked up, flipping back onto her hooves and braced for battle only to notice the conspicuous absence of the killer confectionery. Only to see absolutely nothing except a gaping hole in the wall. The sounds of crashing objects and yelling soon filtered in.
“Monsteeer!”
“What the?! Is that frosting it’s firing out?!”
“Sis, I’m stuck!”
“Aaaah yes, revenge is butter late than never!” Kooky Keki roared.
Chibi Moon grimaced but steeled herself. Innocents were in danger and as both the successor to the title of lunar Guardian and the apprentice to the monster king, she could not stand idly by! Besides, if she managed to wrap this up pretty quick before anyone else got involved nobody might figure out this was her blunder…
With that worry in her mind, Chibi Moon pulled from a hidden fold in her hair a small circular device with a red heart on it. With a fragment of the Silver Crystal’s power in hoof, she took off after the beast.
Kooky Keki cackled crazily as the calamitous corrupted confectionary crushed a colt’s cotton candy. Absorbing the sweets she’d stomped on underhoof into her and growing in size slightly, the cake monster loomed menacing over the befuddled and startled plaza goers she’d trapped in the sticky icing she’d thrown out. Like a spider inspecting a fly, Kooky Keki leaned closer to a very befuddled looking Sweetberry; the pink-furred, blue-and-green-maned mare stuck to her baking stand with her sisters Triple Treat and Cotton Candy.
“Moooooore, more of you whisk great reprisal!” Kooky Keki barked while stalking over the stand.
Sweetberry sputtered as she noticed the monster effortlessly bending the wheels to the mobile baking stall, “Hey! Watch it! Uncle Cake gave us this for Hearth’s Warming!”
A blob of pink and blue, mostly obscured by the delicious frosting covering her, stood up while holding up a pair of candy spools. Cotton Candy seemed totally unfazed at being menaced by confectionary as she replied to the monster like it was a paying customer.
“Want bubble gum or strawberry?” Cotton Candy chimed jovially before a purple mare similarly covered in frosting pulled her back and brandished an oversized lollipop like a rapier for her and her sisters’ defense.
“Back! Back! Heel! Desist!” Triple Treat yelped while jabbing out with the lollipop. She closed her eyes and swung it, grimacing at the squishing, pulpy noise that sounded off before her closed eyelids as well as the spattering of debris that followed.
Triple Treat chanced a peak out of her eye and soon reeled back even before Sweetberry grabbed her and yanked both her and Cotton Candy back. The three sisters tumbled away from the baking stand as Kooky Keki stood unphased, half the lollipop lodged on the top of her head right between the eyes. The semi-liquid monster reached up and wrapped an icing covered hoof around the stalk of the lollipop, pulling it through part of her face where her upper jaw and nose were to get it in her mouth. The crazed confection giggled as she happily smacked her lips across the lollipop, which was too big to fit in her mouth and subsequently stuck out of the side of her cheek before shrinking. Kooky Keki swelled up as the lolipop’s sugary goodness shrunk away to nothingness, the monster soon tossing away the inedible stalk casually before going for the contents of the baking stand’s interior.
“HOLD IT RIGHT THERE!” a voice cried out as the Sweet Sisters and Kooky Keki all looked up the road.
Standing dramatically on the edge of the roof with some inexplicable backlighting, a shadowed Chibi Moon was reared up on her hind hooves with one hoof raised into the wind.
“Sweets are meant to be a lovable treat every now and then, to brighten a day and especially to be shared with loved ones and friends! Not gluttonously guzzled upon selfish demand! I am a Celestial Guardian trainee, and in the name of all love and justice I will punish y-“
“Ah get baked you brat!” Kooky Keki bellowed as her surge crystals-for-eyes flashed and jagged streams of pink lighting shot out.
Chibi Moon yelped as she was forced to jump forward to avoid a direct hit, fumbling off the rooftop. As she tumbled she held aloft her charm and called out.
“Ah, scrap it all! No time for mom’s theatrics today! HENSHIN!”
A bright flash of light blinded all who might have been onlookers, a large burst of fog helping to further mask what followed. In a dazzling display of magical heart symbols wrapping around her like a cocoon, the shape of a crescent moon appeared before it all burst outwards as a shower of glimmering dust. Mariner Chibi Moon landed in a garb not unlike her mother’s armored chestplate and skirt combo, a large pink metal bow helping to cover her chest with protective gloves and boots on her limbs. Twin pieces of her hair were pointed up in a manner akin to small bunny ears, bejeweled with red gems. Rising to her hooves, Mariner Chibi Moon readied herself. The golden tiara under her horn glimmered in tandem with the rubies studding her hair, as she struck a dynamic battle pose.
On instinct she was about to call out something but soon had to hit the deck to avoid more laser fire from the cackling cake cretin. Rolling aside and clicking her heels together, Chibi redirected energy from her horn into the bottom of her feet, making sure to do so to both hooves in order to not be sent spiraling out of control. Putting her forelimbs forward, Chibi closed her eyes and braced for impact with Kooky Keki. The dastardly dish let out a gurgling grunt as her opponent slammed into her, causing icing and rainbow zap apple jam to go flying everywhere.
Chibi came rocketing out the other side, having flown through as such for she busted a hole in Kooky Keki; tumbling across the street. Chibi staggered to her feet, mildly disgusted at being covered in such sticky sucrose that was matting her hair. True it was sweet confectionary and she did have a passing interest in taste testing, but that thought was quickly put to rest when it started wriggling.
“AHGHRAAA AHGRAAAAA!”
Kooky Keki, still gurgling in pain, probably snapped her neck around at a 180° angle and split her face with a grin, “AHGHRAAA AHGRAAAAA- Gotcha, I’m made of sterner stuffing!”
She grinned widely as the spattered sucrose largely took the life of its own and shot back towards her, slithering across the ground as she picked up the sweets stand and guzzled the contents. The gaping hole in her chest was patched up by the returning mass as well as whatever was consumed from the stand’s contents; Kooky Keki swelling up in size like a water balloon.
Chibi grimaced at the uncanny sight of mobile confectionary eating itself.
-Resistant to physical blows, removed parts have a mind of their own, and can absorb substances to get bigger! It’s like a sugary version of Hedorah!-
“Now time to whip you into cream!” Kooky Keki cackled as one of her limbs shot out and lengthened into a tendril, snapping Chibi away from her focus.
The tendril was sloshed out and snapped forward, the unicorn reflexively putting up a barrier shield that the mass crashed into with deceptive force. The pink energy bubble encasing her made a sound akin to a kickball being punted, rapidly bouncing off from the blow as it went careening towards the side of the building. Chibi braced after grimacing, keeping the energy shield up and expanding it so she could absorb the impact, only for Kooky Keki to smack across the back of the barrier again and send her impacting and then rebounding off the wall. The sinister sweet gurgled a cackle as she started dribbling the bouncy ball of the shield between several tendrils and walls.
Ghost Story was minding her own business, sipping some tea while reading another spooky tale after putting in her ear plugs. It had been a busy day in the market outside where she was staying and she planned on visiting the castle during the night shift so she had to catch some rest now. In fact she often liked to challenge herself during such events, and after putting the book away she put on her sleep mask in an effort to navigate her lodging without seeing. Much to her delight she was effortlessly able to make her way to the kitchen and start up the sink. Humming to herself while getting a glass of water for the good day sleep, she was completely ignorant of the tendril flying past her window nor the battle outside.
-Water’s always too warm right at the start of the faucet being on…-
She flexed her deafened, plugged ears, reaching up and tapping at the earplugs to make sure they wouldn’t be uncomfortable to wear in her sleep. Outside the window the barrier shield Chibi was inside was getting dribbled across the neighboring rooftop, before resisting the onslaught of the jagged laser beams fired out from Kooky Keki’s face; splitting edges of malefic energy away in a shower of sparks. Ghost Story puzzled as she felt the water run over her hoof, lifting up her mask while bending down to inspect it so she could peek out one eye.
-Did the neighbors downstairs use up all the cold water? It’s almost Jacuzzi hot!-
Outside her window the beam onslaught stopped and Chibi was visibly mouthing something while her horn started to ignite, only having to quickly stop whatever she was charging up and put the shield back on to avoid several more tendrils slapping the roof around her and exploding into spatterings of confectionary that became animate. She tried to teleport away, but doing so required dropping the shield for a half second, and the confectionary acted; snapping down to grab her.
Ghost Story whacked her sink, which sputtered and started to gurgle before pumping out another jet of water. The bat-winged pegasus smiled.
-Ah there we go! What took yah?-
She readied a cup when the window behind her exploded with impact. Stumbling forward and thankfully avoiding any glass shards, Ghost Story whipped around and was beholden to a very dizzy looking Chibi Moon clad in some kind of armor, encased and engulfed in what looked like animate cake batter that was sparking with yellow energy.
Chibi and Ghost Story’s eyes met as the filly’s mind became slightly less discombobulated after getting dribbled for the past minute, the former about to say something before she noticed the earplugs. She motioned to her ears, glad for the comedic timing allotting her a moment to not get yanked back instantly, and a dumbfounded Ghost Story followed suit to remove her earplugs. Instantly her ears were assailed with yelling outside and a loud gurgling laughter that sounded way too over-the-top to be threatening.
Chibi Moon waved to her even while still partially stuck in the wall, “Konichiwa, Story-san, you might want to move out of the building.”
Ghost Story blinked, still about as mentally discombobulated as the filly due to the suddenness of all this but she was pretty quickly picking up the pieces, “… Monster?”
Chibi Moon nodded with a pout. Ghost Story wanted to ask what happened, how did a monster get in the city, was anyone hurt, and how was Chibi so okay after getting slammed through a window or what she was wearing; but the questions were forcefully stopped when the filly was yanked back through the window. Ghost Story quickly felt compelled to fly out after her and try to help, but seeing the lasers fly through the air quickly brought back memories of an infamous battle from one Canterlot night.
There wasn’t much she could do directly but… She bolted into the hall and raced for the exit, spreading her wings and making for the castle. The battle was in the smaller, thankfully mostly abandoned warehouse district of downtown. There weren’t many guard ponies or sentries about, so word might not travel as fast to the castle. But while she was no speedster, she certainly could travel faster and knew exactly who to call for this kind of situation.
Chibi Moon kicked against the animate sugary sludge that was holding her, her horn igniting several times to try and teleport free or put up the shield but physical contact kept either from happening. She grit her teeth as Kooky Keki reeled her in, cackling crazily.
“Now I have you, my key ingredient! Now I will be set to bake!” she declared as her torso opened up into a cavity Chibi was reeled towards, “ALL ACCORDING TO CAKEKAKU!”
The filly’s eyes widened, not caring at all what exactly it meant that her rampant creation was trying to fuse with her or consume her; nor the irony that the cake was trying to eat her now. Her horn ignited across the spiraling bands and she collected up energy while aiming for the center mass.
“Piiiiink! Sugaaaaarr!-“
“Hey, sugar’s my recipe, get your own attack name, Brat!” Kooky Keki shrieked as she crackled with yellow magic born out of the surge crystals she had for eyes.
Chibi tried to charge up her trump card faster, “Heaaaaaar-MGPH!”
She was cut off and flailed when the animate cake batter leapt onto her face and shocked it, electrocuting her horn while covering her mouth. The filly twitched from the convulsions as her magic concentration faltered, inciting another rabid bit of gurgling laughter from Kooky Keki. Without the proper focus and the chaotic energy coursing into her horn, Chibi couldn’t use her magic….
So she resorted to her back-up means by reaching into the frills of her armor, to the places of holding. While some might call a Celestial Senshi Guardian’s outfit strange, it definitely had plenty of perks beyond reducing all damage to her body and not needing to breathe. Storage spaces were way bigger than they looked, and mares everywhere really appreciated clothing with practical female pockets! And one last jaunt before getting home gave her quite the keepsake.
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Guest authored by ThatGuyVex
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Faded slightly with age but painted in broad strokes of black paint, the sign above the sliding door to the small back-alley shop read ‘Discount Import Sundries, Candies, and Other Random Delights’’. Mariner Chibi Moon pretty much stopped reading at the ‘Candies’ part and immediately gave a little skip of happy satisfaction as she marched down the short, cobblestone pathway towards the door. How did she get here? Not very important. Why was the miniature equine now a miniature human girl sporting a thrifty set of black robes that she didn’t remember putting on but seemed to fit her to a T? Chalk it up to the mysteries of interdimensional travel. None of that really mattered to Chibi Moon, for she was on a quest, and this looked like her next stop!
“Konichi-wa!” she proclaimed merrily as she threw open the sliding wood and paper door, quite similar in style to the doors from her homeland.
“AH!” a startled, female yelp stemmed from the room beyond the doorway, a cozy little store front with various shelves and counters stacked with various items of unidentifiable nature, all situated on a tatami mat. The source of the voice was a human girl, older than Chibi Moon, at just the cusp of adulthood, wearing jeans and a hot pink T-shirt under a black leather jacket. On her right wrist was a bulky yellow watch with an oddly large face that, rather than numbers to tell time, had ‘CH’ in large red letters on it. Orange skin and a two-toned head of wavy red and yellow locks immediately sparked a sense of familiarity to Chibi Moon? Hadn’t she just met someone like this, but in pony form?
Regardless, the girl leapt to her feet in what looked like a very questionable martial arts pose, quickly holding up her watch to her face. A small antenna sprouted from the watch, making Chibi Moon stare at it in innocent curiosity while the girl shouted, “Code 1254! Discord, we have an intruder!”
A distracted voice spoke from the watch, “The rocket launcher is behind the counter. If that doesn’t work, just use the Chappy-Rizer. That’s what I gave it to you for.”
Chibi Moon tilted her head, pigtails bobbing slightly as she said, “Oh, sorry, did I come at a bad time? This is a candy store, right?”
The girl blinked at her a few times, slowly relaxing her dramatic karate stance, “Waaait, are you a customer? Do we even get those?”
“Hai!” Chibi Moon chirped, “I am a customer! I wish to buy the best candy you have! Or, um, borrow it, since I don’t have money. Is that okay?”
“...Lemme check,” the girl said, then spoke once more into the watch, “Discord, cancel the Code 1254. It’s a customer! She wants to buy stuff, but doesn’t have any money!”
“I’m busy!” responded the voice from earlier, “Handle it yourself, Chappy! That’s what I’m paying you for!”
“I get paid!?”
“In food and lodging and me not reporting you to the authorities in Soul Society, yes. Wait... did you say we have a customer?”
There was the sound of something heavy being shoved around from somewhere beyond the door at the back of the storefront, followed by several loud thuds. Then a minute later a gruff looking old man with brown skin came shuffling out of the back door. He was dressed in clothes akin to Neighpon, with a faded dark green and black kimono, wooden clog sandals, and a strange white and green striped hat with a wide, circular brim. He carried a gnarled, wooden cane in one hand, although he seemed to Chibi Moon to be quite spry and hardly needed it.
“Hello there. Not exactly every day we get genuine customers in our doors-”
“What with all the wards designed to prevent precisely that,” the girl, Chappy,, said, and the man cut her off with a light elbowing before giving Chibi a friendly, snaggle toothed smile.
“-Ahem, at any rate, you appear to be wearing Soul Reaper robes, but you don’t exactly strike me as a Soul Reaper, young lady. Be that as it may, far be it for me to be discourteous to a guest. You may call me Discord. I’m the proprietor of this humble shop you see before you.”
“And I’m Chappy!” said the girl, sticking a hand out to Chibi, who took it without hesitation and gave a vigorous shake.
Chibi Moon curtsied, “Hi Miss Chappy, Mister Discord, I’m Chibi Moon! Say, Miss Chappy, you look a lot like this nice lady I met named Princess Sunset Shimmer! Are you two related?”
Discord’s bushy eyebrows went up while Chappy let off a huge grin, “You know Sunset? Wait, Sunset’s a Princess!? Why didn’t she tell me? You’re telling me whenever I keep an eye on her body like I’m doing right now I could be getting treated like royalty somewhere!?”
“You’re looking after her body? Huh?” Chibi Moon’s eyes briefly blue-screened, but that cleared up in a moment as she shook her head, “Ooh, this is because I’m in a different dimension, isn’t it? Right, right, stuff doesn’t work the same everywhere.”
“Ah, I think I have a better idea of what’s going on, now,” said Discord, stroking his chin, “If you’re not, ahem, a ‘local’ then the circumstances of this world might take far too long to explain.”
“Yup,” Chibi Moon nodded, “These sequences are too short for long explanations. Miss Chappy looks like Sunset but isn’t Sunset, but it’s Sunset’s body, yes?”
“That’s about the size of it!” Chappy said, who then frowned in confusion, “Does this mean I’m not a Princess?”
Discord patted her on the shoulder, “Don’t think about it too hard.”
“Oh, if Miss Chappy is in Miss Sunset’s body, then where’s the actual Sunset Shimmer?” asked Chibi Moon with the kind of fascinated, chiming curiosity that seemed to bubble up naturally from her. She hadn’t forgotten why she was here, of course. Her sensei’s cake was of utmost importance. But expecting Chibi Moon to not be curious was like expecting the tides to stop coming in.
To her question, Chappy pointed down at the floor, “Sunset’s downstairs training with her friends. When she does that, I keep an eye on her flesh and blood body. Which means this old guy gets to boss me around, which is super boring, but since he’s letting me and Sunset stay here for free ever since her apartment got exploded, I guess it’s cool.”
“So just what can we get for you?” asked Discord, ignoring it when the ground abruptly shook from some deep, underground rumble.
“Eeeh, what was that?” asked Chibi Moon.
“Huh? Oh, like I said, that’s Sunset and the girls doing some hardcore training,” Chappy said as the ground shook again, rattling the shelves, “It gets pretty intense, lately. Even the underground wards can’t keep all the shockwaves from getting up here.”
“I should probably go check on them,” said Discord, “Make sure they’re not about to blow another hole in the ceiling. Chappy, you can handle Miss Moon’s needs. Don’t worry about payment, just make sure she leaves satisfied with whatever she wants.”
“Wow! Really!?” Chibi Moon was so overjoyed she gave the old man a firm tackle hug, “That’s really nice, thank you!”
Looking a tad taken aback, Discord managed to peel the enthusiastic girl off of him and shuffled away through the back door, giving a quick tip of his hat as he did so, “No need to thank me. Just consider it my way of speeding you along on your journey, Miss Moon... for the safety of both your dimension and mine.”
“Ara?” she asked, having not really heard that last part, which was spoken in a soft whisper, but Discord just smiled.
“Oh, nothing, just the confused mutterings of an old shopkeeper. Good day, ladies. Chappy, I’m counting on you to be a good customer service representative and meet all of Miss Moon’s needs.”
Chappy threw a salute with her watch bearing hand, “You got it, boss/slave driver!”
After Discord had departed, Chibi Moon started bouncing around the shop, looking at the various items on display. Strangely, despite the shop’s name, nothing immediately looked to her like candy. There were certainly a lot of packages and bottles, all with mysterious labels, but as Chibi read them she saw names like ‘Anti-Hollow Explosive Spray’ or ‘Soul Enriching Stimulant Fluid’ or ‘Enlarge Your Zanpakutou Miracle Pills!’. She gave Chappy a questioning look.
“Excuse me Miss Chappy, but where are the candies?”
“Right! Candy! Discord’s got that on the sign, doesn’t he? Uhhhhh...” Chappy gained a thousand-mile stare as she scratched her head and wandered up and down the store’s shelves, “I know we’ve got something here like that. Maybe behind the counter?”
She dove behind a low wooden counter at the back of the shop, and Chibi saw various items being tossed aside as Chappy dug around, including hauling out a huge object wrapped in cloth that was vaguely shaped like a bulky launcher, including eight barrels on the front of it. Chibi’s eyes lit up at the sight, “What is that?”
Chappy, still holding the launcher in one hand, blinked and said, “Huh, this? It’s Screwloose’s, I think? Discord calls it a rocket launcher, which is weird because it doesn’t even shoot rockets, but spirit bullets or something. We keep it up here in case we ever get any rowdy visitors.”
Tossing the launcher aside, which happened to land next to Chibi Moon’s feet, Chappy went back to digging around behind the counter. Chibi Moon, despite herself, kept eyeing the ‘rocket launcher’, which was taller than she was, with curious eyes. Something about the bulky weapon spoke to her, as if it was somehow meant for the hands of a petite, cute girl with pigtails. Almost unconsciously she patted the weapon and whispered, “Aww you wanna come with me, don’t you?”
“What was that?” Chappy asked.
“Nothing! I wasn’t planning on taking the cool spirit cannon! Nope! Hey, wait, would that be okay?” Chibi beeped out quickly.
“Discord said you could have whatever you wanted, so have at it!” Chappy said, popping back up from behind the counter and holding a small cardboard box, “I mean, the customer is always right, right!? Right! And check it out, found some candy!”
“Yosh!” Chibi Moon hopped happily in place as she grabbed the multi-barreled cannon, which had some convenient purple rope straps that made it easy to loop over her shoulder while Chappy came around the counter and held out the box she found. Inside were a number of colorful dispensers with cartoonish animal heads that instantly reminded Chibi of certain children’s candy she’d seen in Equestria.
“Pez?” she asked, tilting her head.
“Gikon!” Chappy said, “Soul Candy! Just like me!”
“You’re candy?”
Chappy’s smile turned slightly embarrassed, “Kinda? I am pretty sweet, if I say so myself. Soul Reapers eat these to pop out of their... you know what, too long an explanation, but these are the closest thing to candy I can find and I think they’re supposed to taste pretty good going down, too. We’ve got lots of types too.”
She held up one with a white rabbit head, “This is a Chappy model, just like me! Most popular among female Soul Reapers. Oh, and this one’s Yuki the duck! And here we have Gringo the Panda!”
“Ooo, I like that one!” Chibi said, enamoured with the candy dispenser that sported a fierce looking panda with a cigar in his mouth, “He’s cute, but tough looking, just like my sensei!”
“Then he’s all yours!” Chappy said, handing over the dispenser to an eager Chibi, “So what do you need it for, anyway?”
“I’m gonna make a super special cake for my sensei’s birthday!” Chibi declared, and Chappy seemed to think this over for a moment. Were Soul Candies actually food? Sure, you ate them, but that was only because... well, it wasn’t really important. As far as Chappy was concerned, if they weren’t meant to be eaten, then they shouldn’t be called ‘candies’. It was probably alright.
“That sounds fun. Wish Sunset Shimmer would let me eat cake, but she’s super stingy about that ever since that binge I went on,” Chappy sighed, and Chibi, fully understanding about being restricted from sweets, gave the girl a comforting pat.
“If I ever come back here someday, I’ll be sure to make you a cake too, Miss Chappy.”
“Aww, you’re such a good kid. I bet your sensei is gonna love the cake you make for him,” Chappy replied, shaking off her funk instantly and placing her hands on her chips, “So is there anything else I can get for you? Your incredibly awesome and helpful customer service rep, Chappy, will not let you leave the store unsatisfied!”
Chibi giggled and tucked the Soul Candy dispenser into the black Soul Reaper robes she was inexplicably wearing in this dimension, “Nope! You’ve been really helpful, Miss Chappy. Tell Mister Discord thank you again for the free candy, and the cannon!”
“Just be responsible with that military-grade spirit weapon, okay? Wouldn’t want you hurting yourself,” Chappy said, as if there was nothing wrong whatsoever with the sentence she just said in relation to a young child.
“I’ll be careful!!” Chibi assured her, turning towards the door and giving a final wave, “Jaa ne!”
After the young girl had left, to whatever further adventures awaited her, Chappy kept tending the storefront, until about ten minutes later a blue skinned woman with a messy mop of gray hair came wandering out, yawning as if having just woken up from a long nap.
“Hey rabbit, the boss says you’re free to go nab some lunch. I’ll keep an eye on the store for a bit.”
“Oh? Sure thing, Screwloose. Don’t have too much fun!” Chappy said, happily stretching and wandering towards the kitchen. Meanwhile Screwloose settled behind the counter, and started going about her usual checks to make sure everything was on order...
“What the-!? Where... where’s my cannon!?”
==================
Kooky Keki’s rabid laughter stopped when she noticed the rocket launcher pointed at her and mentally double-taked, “AHGHRAAA AHGRAAAAA- What the fudg-“
The cake youma promptly exploded from the missile impact, sending icing and batter flying everywhere.
Chibi landed in the blast crater, mildly grossed out by the bits and pieces of cake and frosting raining down from the sky; sometimes in fairly big chunks. In the back of her mind, she was registering just how far south her plans had gone. Glimpsing bits and pieces of zap apple and the smell of tea grinds amidst the debris reminded her just what the monster actually was composed of. All of her efforts, all of her journeys, and all of her struggle at all amounted to… Practically nothing.
Nothing but a lot of stress, freaked out civilians, and a big mass she no doubt was responsible to clean despite how much of a mess had occurred and how much it was starting to weigh on her. Her leg shook under her weight and that of the rocket launcher, shook enough that her body crumbled to the ground and her eyes were downcast. The future Senshi sniffled and wiped at her eye with the side of her arm.
-I just wanted to make something special for Sensei, to give him a birthday present like all the other ones I’d gotten… Folks like him do so much good to get so little, and yet I woke up this morning wondering what I get…-
She sighed, rubbing at her sides.
-Sometimes I worry if I’m a spoiled brat…-
A large clump of cake flopped down on the ground in front of her and Chibi dimly regarded it, half wondering if she should try and bite after all if only to give herself a moral boost from the sugar…. Only to pause when it creaked and turned about to look at her with cracked, crystalline, yellow eyes.
“THAT. HURT-” Kooky Keki snarled gurglingly as the blob turned around to face Chibi, revealing itself to be her blown off head.
Every bit in piece of Kooky Keki simultaneously started to vibrate, save for chunks which had been blackened by the rocket explosion. On cue they all started to pull together towards the central mass.
“-I’LL MAKE YOU INTO A SOUFFLÉ, YOU LITTLE BRAT!” Kooky Keki roared as Chibi tried to take aim again with the rocket launcher.
A jagged yellow beam fired out from Kooky Keki’s cracked eyes and into the barrels of the military weapon, Chibi panicking when the metal started to warp and expand at the base. Igniting her horn’s spirals, the filly teleported away as the multi-barreled rocket launcher exploded from the assault hitting the stored remaining ammo. Chibi however was still caught up in the shockwave of the blast as she was moved away, reappearing on the other side of the street and fumbling down the incline with a loud yelp.
Her ears were still ringing as she staggered to her feet, swaying back and forth with her eyes dilated. Through the incessant ringing she could hear nothing, and her vision was full of stars. The shockwave had messed up her fur and hair, and the poor filly was doing all she could just to stand on her hooves. Ahead of her, Kooky Keki had reformed most of her body aside from a large hole in her chest.
Her manic and yet infuriated expression was painfully obvious even with her cake batter-composed visage. She pulled the tail off her haunches, Pinkie Pie’s tail, and repeatedly hit it on the ground in a mocking gesture. Somehow despite the fluffy composition, it seemed rigid and stiff like a club. And it was pretty obvious what she intended to use it for. She braced before pouncing out just as Chibi’s hearing was starting to come back.
“BATTER-UP!” Kooky Keki cackled as charged forward, and Chibi Moon set to try and concentrate.
Through all the pain, the ringing in her ears, prior dread from before, and the sense of loss in light of all her efforts being in vain; she concentrated just as her parents and her sensei taught her to. One by one each layer of her horn separated by the spiral started to glow, innate magic in the gift of the lunar guardian from the Silver Crystal working in tandem.
“Piiink… Sugar…. Heaaart….”
The power collected and crackled, parts of her mane igniting in emulation of whom she copied to do this. She opened her eyes again and was beholden to her attacker taking a swing at her face, her adrenaline making her perceive it in slow-motion.
She’d failed. She failed her mission to get her sensei his first birthday present, failed to understand the magic he meddled with, and thus unleashed this mistake on others. The entire day wasn’t a total failure, not with all those she had met along the way and helped out where she could. But mistakes had been made and needed to be rectified. That was something she’d learned from many.
Doesn’t matter if a mistake knocks you down, what matters is if you can get back up afterwards.
Kooky Keki was about to make contact, fully intending to pound and pummel this filly for all the trouble she put her through. She thought getting in close would keep her creator from trying to use any magic, and terrify the little pest.
She’d seen the tears in Chibi Moon’s eyes and grinned at it.
Her grin faded into shock when the little girl glared at her through the tears and let loose.
“ATTAAAACK!” The future Lunar Senshi cried out as she opened the floodgates of magic built up behind her horn.
The very innate talent and raw firepower that had so terrified her previous teachers and led her to a sensei that helped cultivate it, was put to full use. A vaguely heart-shaped beam of pink plasma crashed into Pinkie Pie’s removed tail, instantly vaporizing it along with most of Kooky Keki’s arm. But just as Chibi swept the beam aside like a swinging sword to slash through the youma’s body, another light appeared.
Kooky Keki, face twisted in insane rage, lit up her surge crystal eyes and jagged energy was loosed- only to be quickly outshone by a blinding mass of light engulfing her head. Chibi Moon’s special attack and the gestalt of a crackling blue burst of magic and spiralling cyan plasma smashed into the youma, who withstood it for only a moment before being picked up off the ground.
"AWW darn! Looks like even the mightiest cake-”
The malefic creation was hurled away as the assault launched Kooky Keki into the air well outside of Canterlot’s borders.
“CAN FAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLLLLlllllll…..”
The cake monster’s carried on as she went rocketing into the mountain on the opposite side of the valley, engulfed by the fused attack for several long seconds before an exhausted Chibi Moon was forced to cut off her ray.
The blue beams of plasma and magic continued on for several seconds more before similarly extinguishing. If there was anything left of Kooky Keki, it was obliterated soon afterwards; in true tokusatsu monster tradition, there was a puff of an explosion on the mountainside big enough to be seen from Canterlot.
The sky cleared and all quieted down. Chibi’s hearing fully returned to her even with the ensuing exhaustion, enough to pick up on the heavy footsteps and wingbeats behind her. Even without turning her head she knew exactly who it was by the color of the rays prior. She kept her head bowed, ears drooped after glancing about the damage to the downtown market. Be it now or later, she knew a lecturing was coming.
A year or two ago she might have run away crying, or even tried some trick of teleporting or disguises to get away. But be it because of the uniform she wore or the instruction given to her recently, Chibi stayed in place as her idol and her mentor raced up behind her.
Chibi expected questions… Not to get scooped up in a bear hug before being turned around so a very worried looking Godzilla Junior could get a better look at her. He studied her diligently, wiping off some of the batter stuck to her face to make sure it wasn’t hiding any bruises. The fact she had more than a few only served to make the giant stallion fret more. It was only by the arrival of a hoof studded in dark regalia did Junior still, as Princess Luna motioned him to simmer down.
Godzilla took a breath and steeled himself, before looking upon his apprentice. They locked eyes in a silent conversation that started peacefully... Before becoming a very not-so silent conversation when he exploded in such a rapid fire Neighponese, or rather Japanese, that it was completely unintelligible aside from showing great amounts of obvious concern.
Thankfully about 15 seconds Princess Luna rolled her eyes and used a bit of telekinesis to gently remove Chibi from her accomplice’s grasp, applying a soothing mending spell to patch up some of her bruises and scrapes while putting a hoof to his muzzle.
“Lord of Monsters, please, there are non-foreigners in thou midst present,” she quipped before releasing him.
Junior sighed and nodded, moving closer to Chibi as she was placed back down on the ground, lowering down to equalize their height somewhat.
“Chibi, and you were very brave to rush in when you were needed; but you got hurt in the process of your heroism-"
A little hoof put to his lips silenced him once again. Chibi lowered her neck into her shoulders and let her ears flop. Chibi frowned, glancing back and seeing some other ponies, be it guards including though she had seen earlier, and passersby trying to be good samaritans wielding anything from brooms to chairs; approaching unsure if the battle was over.
She bit her lip and motioned to be put down, as her hind hooves were dangling a full meter off the ground due to being in the grasp of her gigantic teacher. Junior complied and set her down.
Chibi Moon gulped and took a few steps back before standing her ground, clicking her hooves together like she was at attention before the royals.
“Sensei, Princess of the Night, the blame for what you see is mine. All mine!”
Godzilla Junior and Princess Luna paused and tilted their heads in a way one could hear the creaking in their necks, as did some of the approaching ponies even if they didn’t quite catch all she said. Luna and Junior looked to one another, glancing about at all the damage to the marketplace with raised eyebrows, shrugs, and pursed lips that trembled in confusion. Princess Luna eyed some scorch marks on the ground that looked like magic blasts, signalling her accomplice with her eyes and then tilting her head to Chibi Moon as if to suggest that was what the filly was on about. Junior shrugged before turning back to his apprentice.
“Chibi, you shouldn’t be too upset about some collateral damage. This can be fixed and no one else got hurt,” Junior grunted, thinking he knew what the topic was from how grim she looked, “You can’t always take the fight elsewhere, but you kept others from getting swept up in it.”
“N-No that’s not what I meant!” Chibi yelped as she jumped up in front of the two, waving her hooves.
“…” Junior brow perked as he raised and straightened up, “Then what do you mean?”
Mariner Chibi Moon paused for a moment before she wilted, visibly fighting back drowning waves of emotion and several tears stinging at the corners of her eyes. She looked ready to crumble, about to fall over before stamping her hoof to recollect herself.
She shot back up, “I-I made that monster… as an accident, I swear! A big spell accident! The fault is all mine.”
The onlookers started to murmur to themselves in clear confusion. Several guards including Princess Luna, the newly arriving Captain Frost, an old timer who’d come brandishing a mop, and Godzilla however were less perplexed. Likely because all of them had seen similar levels of craziness to buy the story pitch.
“What... kind of magic did thou partake of, youth?” Princess Luna grunted calmly, not showing much emotion as she raised her brow.
“I- er….” Chibi Moon took in a breath and collected herself, “I was… trying to make Sensei a cake. I don’t exactly know how to bake and I was getting ingredients from others.”
“Sounds ‘bout right,” Captain Frost quipped as she stepped up beside Godzilla, “She hit up the barracks earlier an’ got some stuff from me. Didn’t think ye’ could put it in a cake though.”
“Hence the spell,” Chibi Moon mumbled as she kicked over a pebble and let her ears droop, “… Didn’t expect it to make a monster. The spell was… weird.”
“Define, ‘weird’; youngling,” the thousand-year-old alicorn asked, in the company of a transformed radioactive dinosaur, Captain Frost, and the heiress to a centuries old group of magical warriors.
“I combined an old Neighponese spell made by a previous celestial guardian with some ancient Equestrian spell from Starswirl’s era,” Chibi Moon muttered.
Princess Luna’s brow perked as everyone else’s head tilted, the alicorn even looking… chipper for a moment, “Really? Oh I knew I was in the right to overrule those oafs at the School for Gifted Unicorns and allow you in! You must tell me what you-”
Princess Luna, perhaps realizing many eyes were upon her and that she’d broken character in public by letting her regality falter, promptly coughed into her hoof and took a small step back. She patted Junior across the back with a wing to beckon him forward.
“We see fit to allow thy Lordship to handle this situation,” the Princess of the Night preened with an air of royalty returning to her tone, “We trust thou to work with thy student.”
A bit of awkwardness passed in the moment before Captain Frost cleared her throat to chime in.
“Bad outcome from good intentions, kid,” Captain Frost shrugged, “Good thing n’one got hurt.”
“B-but the marketplace is trashed, that’s all my fault!” Chibi Moon yelped.
Captain Frost looked to Godzilla, Princess Luna, vice versa, before looking back, “Accidents happen, kid.”
Chibi Moon sputtered, “But I’m to blame!”
“You’re also to blame for folks surviving the way they did,” Godzilla noted calmly as he squatted down beside his protégé.
Chibi Moon sniffled, unsure and not meeting his eyes as she increasingly shrank back and sat on her haunches. A broad hoof gently nudged her own and Junior put his head next to her and whispered.
“Hey… Do you remember what I first taught you?”
The little filly stiffened as a tear ran down her snout, letting her mind drift back to a little lesson that started when she almost stepped on a little critter she otherwise wouldn’t have noticed. She wouldn’t have noticed because she was the one with grandeur and power, and it wasn’t. Power she had a lot harder of the time cultivating and controlling back then.
Chibi furrowed her brow in recollection, “That... power needs to be used responsibly, to protect life.”
“Responsibly, yes. You were irresponsible for using some magic you might not have fully understood… But that’s not all you did today, is it?” Junior whispered as he tilted her head to look at the potholes and cracked walls decorating the marketplace.
“It can be fixed, and you’ll help. But it can be fixed, lives can’t. And when it came to trying to own up and help, you did the right thing,” the monster king noted as he patted the top of his apprentice’s head, “You took my lesson to heart, kid. That’s one of the best birthday gifts I could have asked for.”
“You’re… not going to disown me?” Chibi Moon whimpered.
Junior shook his head slowly and smiled all the same. As Captain Frost and the crowds dispersed to help start clean up of the ruined marketplace, Princess Luna perhaps thought it appropriate now to rejoin the discussion in private; leaning down to whisper as well.
“You are a student and you are to learn. If my sister seriously reprimanded her students every time they stumbled, she’d have quit teaching long ago. You should hear about what a grown mare twice your age once did with an old stuffed doll,” Princess Luna rolled her eyes and nodded with a slight smile.
Chibi Moon looked to her mentor and idol slowly, letting it sink in. She knew she’d done wrong, and she’d learn from that. And maybe, just maybe, this day wouldn’t be a complete wash after all of her jaunting. Observing a pile of charred cake still stuck to a few serving plates from a blown up food stand, Chibi Moon used a bit of telekinesis to fully push it onto the plate and levitated over to herself before offering it to her company.
“After the cleanup, I think I might just have a birthday gift idea for you yet, Sensei.”
Junior perked his brow and Luna shot him a snicker as she used a bit of her own magic to divide the cake piece up at the thirds. The filly and mare took their pieces up with a bit of magic.
“And what might that be?” Junior asked as he eyed his female company. He tried to get his horn to light up in the right sequence for some telekinesis but gave up after only managing to make the cake piece shudder slightly.
“Well it just so happens my birthday is coming up-“
Chibi paused as all three of them took a bite of what used to be a cake monster. A second passed by before all of their eyes looked like they were about the bulge out of their skulls and their cheeks rapidly inflated with an instinctive revulsion at the horrible taste. Turns out, making a cake with ingredients including but not limited to energy surge crystals, nutrient bars, coffee, and more did not exactly translate to palatability. The Princess of the Night, King of the Monsters, and Lunar Heiress all promptly turned around in different directions to spit out Kooky Keki’s last act of defiance and revenge.
It was a much calmer day sometime later in that week, though the populace gathering was not especially calm itself. The small lake in the precipice plateau of Canterlot mountain had an ample gathering about it. Fluttershy conducted a choir of birds to provide a tune as the three little Crusaders eagerly joined into a dance number Phoenix Flamez was putting on, no doubt trying to see if step coordination could lead to a new cutie mark as Destroyah feigned disinterest while keeping a watchful eye. Ki Seong, Applejack, and Thalia were helping one another set up the buffet table with a variety of treats as Anguirus and Rodan moved it into position. Lea and Twilight relaxed in the shade of a tree passing a book between them to read to each other. Rainbow Dash had evidently decided Rarity and her mother weren’t enjoying the lake enough in their efforts to avoid getting wet on their sunbathing floats and had just cannon-balled next to them with a large splash. A company of guards, more than enjoying the grub being served up, were waving and beckoning to Blade Dancer. The latter was busy trying to pull Xenilla away from Princess Cadance and Shining Armor so they could actually enjoy the lake without him badgering the pregnant ‘empress’ about food cramps from eating recently. Celestia sat off to the side by her own volition, joined only by Captain Frost at an old headstone from centuries back, whispering something to it as she eyed her sister.
Princess Luna had gone swimming with her ‘personal bodyguard’, and her sister was very privy to their close proximity the whole time. She gave a knowing smirk and patted Starswirl’s headstone assuringly; while earning an approving wink from Captain Frost.
The sopping wet alicorn and mutated unicorn's bodies drew close once again, eyes meeting and smiles widening.
"You've become quite the capable mentor," Luna whispered, horn sparking lightly as she tapped the tip to Junior's.
"Your sister hoofed over a How-To book," Godzilla shrugged playfully, eyes half lidded as he sighed contently at her presence, letting Luna put a wing around him, "And you're quite the one to talk. With how you helped Rarity save herself and took up Glimmer."
"Well it's not like either of us were professionals," Luna cooed with a snicker, "If anything, it shows everypony... and everykaiju for that matter, has room to grow. Kind of like the point of birthdays actually, a celebration of another year of progress while gaining gifts to better the future."
"And I couldn't imagine a better place or company to do both with..."
They drew close and nuzzled. Their horns touched knowingly before a whistle called their attention from the shore. They and the others came forth, coming to a small table in which a floaties-clad Chibi Moon was assisting Pinkie Pie in setting down a reasonably but not audaciously large cake. The baker, having managed to whip this up lickety-split, gave the filly a wink and pushed her forward with a serving spatula.
Chibi Moon beamed as she stood up on her tippy-hooves to reach up to the top of the cake especially could, a few moments passing before she was gripped with a small blue bit of telekinesis magic and levitated up to equal height with her sensei by the will of a smirking Luna holding her up. The lit candles didn’t especially designate any specific number of years, both because the actual count would risk a lot of wax getting on the cake, and because the sentimental value mattered more than an exact date. A lot of crazy things that happened over the course of this crazy tale, and it was all far from over.
And based on the beaming smiles of the assorted company of locals, foreigners, and migrants from a different dimension; that truth was more than welcome.
Junior and Chibi drew close to the lit candles and started to absorb a breath. The little filly had found a gift for a kaiju who wanted for nothing after all. The cake had two names written on it.
For Godzilla Junior's birthday, she had gifted him her birthdate.
“Happy birthday, Sensei.”
“Happy birthday, Chibi.”
Chibi moved to blow the candles out only to have a tiny puff of blue plasma immediately light the candles once again. She looked at toothy, jesting grin of her mentor.
“Senseeeei!”
“Gotcha.”
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Aww! the birthday party bit was really sweet!
Also looks like Jr and Luna are catching up to the other couples in showing obvious affection slowly but surely.
Aside from some words missing the right color(which isn't a big deal since it's easy to tell who's talking)
i can't see anything else amiss. Nice work Tarb!
Adorable ending
OMG, this was a pleasant surprise. Came out on my older brother’s birthday. Love the fact that Chibi knows how to have a Henshin moment and that she is capable of holding her own against a cake monster. That crossover with the Bleach story was unexpected, but also quite fun, and I love how Junior and Luna act like patient and understanding parents when they help Chibi out of the mess. Junior and Chibi’s birthday scene was very sweet, especially with all the couples having fun while Junior and Luna are getting more emotionally intimate. The ending with the candles in the cake was sweet and adorable.
Well, we all knew Chibi's spell was going to go sideways, and we were right. Still, Hedora-cake beast was definitely a surprise.
The scene where she finds the warning reminded me of this scene from the movie Doctor Strange: " Yeah, you know, you really should have stolen the whole book, because the warnings... the warnings come after the spells."
I see what you did there
Lovely story, much wholesome, have an upvote that I should have given months ago.
You could say that the well written battle and sweetly handled interactions of the characters was the icing on this cake. Chibi's initial plan may have been half-baked, but she managed to churn out a win over her non-nutritious nemeis. A heartwarming bonding with her sensei was the cherry on top. I can't think of any more food related puns off the top of my head.
You think you have enough references
Sailor Moon Pokemon what next ultraman?!
BAhahahahahhaha
Oh my God, Yus! More Gen 3 ponies. And my OG girl Sweetberry!
Ha, that sludge bastard.
Aaaaaw
Nix getting a feeling some pony is judging her XD
Well, this was a fun ride. And a good final to end on this diabetes inducing adventure.
I really had a lot of fun reading this. Lol. And the birthday party at the end was adorable.
The only question I'd like to ask is about when Junior tried to use magic on that piece of cake. Is he studying magic?
This was a heart warming side story. Jr's talk with chili brought a smile to my face.
JUST KISS ALREADY!!!!