- Member Since 26th Jun, 2018
- offline last seen March 28th
Minty Sundae
<== Razz is taking pics of my butt again
Minty Sundae
Joined 26th Jun, 2018 ·
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That was awesome. Good job there m8 maybe a sequel is in order
This was a fairly decent entry! A lot of the buildup felt a little bit stale, stylistically speaking, but you broke through here and there with some fairly evocative stuff. Don't be afraid of flourish. Though the average FIMfic reader probably won't appreciate it, people who actually want to read stuff more complicated then >greentext will appreciate the extra effort to be immersive. We've got four senses besides sight - evoking those can help immensely with making your work more interesting to read.
Excellent sequel. Great work.
There needs to be more of this kind of interaction in father-daughter incest clopfics.