Equestria's Dark Mage

Golden Fang Ryu Shenron #1 · Apr 14th, 2019 · 3 · 7 · Death & Lose ·

Death. Death was all that the kings, Queens, Princesses and Prince's see at the northern mountains. Army's of ponys, griffons, dragons etc laid on the battle field. Lifeless, the army that was left were breathing and beaten heavily while the pony wizards all tried there best to heal as many injured as they could.

Oh man, already this is looking like a war zone!!!

"Princesses Celeista, more than 70% of our army has been whipped out from the last attack! We will not survive another attack. Even with the aid of the other kingdoms!" yelled the second in command of the royal guard.

70 percent...this wizard must really be powerful!!!

The Princesses of the sun looked at the commander as she stared with a feared expression, trying her best to look brave for her men and women. The anthro pony than reached for her side grabbing the rode of her sword and unleashed it as she aimed it up as it shined in the sun.
"Do not fear! Do not surrender! We shall not fail! We are rulers of Equestria and we will no matter what! Protect our home!" Celeista yelled as the army's that had gathered cheered as they all yelled in agreement. While the Kings and Queens spoke amongst each other about the battle ahead.
"We risk our life's and the life's of our army now and we shall fall sooner! I say we fall back and gather more allies." The prince of the panther kingdom said while he looked among the others.

Will they stay and fight, or retreat for there lives? An important lesson to learn indeed.

"If we go with that plan, what's not to say that our foe will do the same huh?" questioned Queen Chrysalis of the changeling hive.
"Razor must agree with bug queen! Razor say we stay and fight evil human!" King Razor the third roared of the diamond dog kingdom, as his claws dug into the table.
"We must make a discussion now, before our foe shows its self. So far our choice are either falling back to fight another day or fighting to our last breath." said a prince of the new formed kingdom of humans as roars came from the battle yield in front of them.

Looks like its too late for that!!!

Demons had arrived, but this were no normal demons, they were demons with powers of gods and nature itself. Many of this demons had taken the life's of many and even entire kingdoms.
"I-Its them! We have no choice but to flee now! We won't last against the demons!" a solider from the royal guard said as the stallion stepped back but a female guard grabbed his shoulder and shook her head.
"He's near, I can sense his magic." The dragon king said out loud as many demons in front of the army moved aside as the person himself stood forward with a small smile on his lips holding a single book in his hand. The young man. He wears high-collared red (black in the anime) and tan robes with gold trim, along with a large, flowing white toga draped around his torso. He has short black hair, dark eyes, and abnormally sharp canines. He also wears a pendant.

Wait...is that?

"It's him, the black wizard, Zeref." said the human king as he stepped forward. "He's the only human that seeks to end our world as we know it. The only one with magic."

ZEREF!!!

"What is with his guy? He's a human, but shouldn't be able to use magic!" Yelled a pony guard as he held his magic resist shield up while some guards nodded.
"From what you said, he's not from your kingdom, you said he simple popped out of thin air." asked Celeista as she looked at the human king.
"That is right, he said that he will end the age of pony and man to bring forth a new era, a era of demons." he said as Zeref stood with a small smile before stepping forward.

NOT ON OUR WATCH!!!

"Ponys, humans, griffins, dragons, all other creatures have only one thing in mind, to do what they think it's right, and not care about others. Many ponys frown apon humans, and some smile, but those smiles are what make humans think there friendly, many smile to get what they want." he said in a soft tone but loud enough so all can hear.

Indeed they do.

"Demons on the other hand, don't have a goal, no smile, no frown. Only death." said the griffin king. "That makes them monsters worse than us creatures as you put it!"

Indeed it does....

"Maybe your right, Maybe your wrong, only those with the power to change can have a say. Those who don't, can stay out." Zeref said as he slowly pointed at them.
"But enough talk. We are not here for that. We are here to see who shall leave and who shall die here." Zeref said as his demons all waited as the allies armys did the same. The rulers glared at the black wizard as he smiled back.
"Before we battle, that book. What is that book?" Celeista asked as she stepped forward watching the book feeling powerful magic from it even passing her own.

The Book of Zeref...confining E.N.D.

"I am glad you ask, you may know all this demons had came from a book similar to this in my hands, they are called demons of the book of Zeref. Demons that i had written. But this here. Is the most powerful demon that i have ever made, the only demon that can kill me." Zeref said with a smile as he rubbed the books surfs with his hand.
This information had shooked most guards and rulers as they all glared. "The magic to make life?! How can a human like you posses that magic?! No one can alive can handle that type of magic!!"

No one except the Immortal Black Wizard.

Zeref closed his eyes as his smile fell before he opened them once more as his black eyes were replaced by blood red ones. "You don't have the power to question me, now you may face me or my demons, but know this. You all will be put in history for the battle you lost. Now face the power of my magic!" he yelled as he did a moving motion with his arms as he than aimed both palms at the army doing a symbol with his fingers. "Chapter nine of the book of Zeref: Dark Angel"

...Dark Angel...?!

Starlight Nova

Starlight Nova #2 · Apr 15th, 2019 · 6 · · Death & Lose ·

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You should fix the synopsis. Run on sentences tend to turn people off. Also, the word I should always be capitalized. Please respond to this comment.

Marcellus Jones

Marcellus Jones #3 · Apr 15th, 2019 · 3 · · Death & Lose ·

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I am insulted. I saw the title and I thought it was a biography about me.

Very disappointed.

metroid_freak

metroid_freak #4 · Apr 15th, 2019 · 5 · · Death & Lose ·

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Oof, try again. On second thought, maybe not.

Vigriff

Vigriff #5 · Apr 20th, 2019 · 3 · · Death & Lose ·

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Zeref, one of the few Fairy Tail characters who doesn't piss me off.

link4

link4 #6 · Apr 27th, 2019 · 2 · · Here we go again. ·

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9566146
just by reading the first 2 quotes you have, i can already tell celestia is a blind arrogant ruler. it's a lone human, which means you had to have gone way out of your way to gather an army and attack HIM. this battle is self defense on the humans part. and they claim him evil? worse, 70 percent of the entire army is gone, and celestia STILL plans to continue the assault? the fuck tia...?

Corrupted_king

Corrupted_king #7 · Apr 27th, 2019 · 3 · · Here we go again. ·

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Is he going to turn them into demons

tryingmybest1111

tryingmybest1111 #8 · Apr 28th, 2019 · 2 · · It Begins ·

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I stopped reading after checking out this chapter after seeing it on the latest updates page. I'm going to post an excerpt:

>Twilight Sparkle the princess of friendship along with the other elements of harmony expect who was Twilight's student stayed back at the castle along the the young dragon spike who was like Twilight's little brother.

They were being escorted by four solar guards in gold armor armed with swords and spears. The young princess had many thoughts going threw her head, many theory's on why she was summoned to her highness.

In the first two paragraphs, you have a run-on sentence and multiple typos. It's evident that you aren't proofreading, when you really should be.

Golden Fang Ryu Shenron

Golden Fang Ryu Shenron #9 · Apr 28th, 2019 · 1 · 2 · It Begins ·

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9591803

Just by reading the first 2 quotes you have, i can already tell celestia is a blind arrogant ruler. it's a lone human, which means you had to have gone way out of your way to gather an army and attack HIM. this battle is self defense on the humans part. and they claim him evil? worse, 70 percent of the entire army is gone, and celestia STILL plans to continue the assault? the fuck tia...?

Eeyup, Tia's not exactly being smart here.

Golden Fang Ryu Shenron

Golden Fang Ryu Shenron #10 · Apr 28th, 2019 · · 1 · Here we go again. ·

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It has been many years since the battle with the creature allies against the dark lord and Equestria was at peace for years to come until now.
In a Castle on the side of the highest mountain, two ailcorn sisters lived together and ruled over there home known as Equestria. But today was no normal happy day, today the princess of the sun and ruler was having a hard time getting her nerves and fears together.

All because of one dark mage....

"Oh my, Oh my." the light white ailcorn princess mumbled while walking back and forth in her throne room with two gray earth pony's in gold armor with spears in hoof watched while standing next to her throne.
"Dear sister, please calm thu self, you haven't stop since we got word of the dark lord." said the dark blue furr princess with a moon cuite mark on her flank while her different color mane floated in the air. "Thu should not be nervous."
Princess Celestia looked at her sister Luna with wide eyes while her mouth slightly open. "Luna this human, is more dangerous then any foe we have faced!" she half yelled while she walked over to her midnight sister. "Remember all those lives! The other rulers! Many many deaths!"

Well, this is the legendary Black Wizard after all...just be glad you're not facing Acnologia!!!

"Then why not use the elements on him?" Luna asked/suggested while she looked out the nearest window into the dark night.
"Well maybe because...you know I've never thought of that." Celestia said while she ran out of the throne room towards her own room leaving Luna all alone with the two guards who stood there stiff as ever.

!!!

With Celestia who was now in her room searching for her paper and ink to write a latter to her dear student Twilight Sparkle. "Dear my faithful student, i need you and the Element of Harmony to come to Canterlot at once! Your teacher and friend Princess Celestia." and with that she quickly sent it out in hopes that her faithful student well come soon.

And soon the mane six will meet him....

A single man stood in the middle along with three others that didn't look human or anything that lives in Equestria at all. The one who was feasting on the flesh of the dead had sharp teeth a long snout furr all over its body that stood on two legs with claws as sharp as knifes while the other two had coats on stood in the shadows.
"Our goal here is done, our next mission will need one of my demons, sharpeye come here." Zeref himself said as the demon wolf man looked at his master and walked over with a body in his mouth.
"I need you to get a book for me at the castle of the two sisters." Zeref said as the wolf nodded while it threw the body of the dragon in his mouth away and stood ready.
"You'll need to find the demon known as Deliora." Zeref said with a soft smile. The demon nodded and ran out the cave and into the night.
"Lord Zeref, why do we need Deliora now? Why not use your lower class demons first?" asked a clocked demon as the female stood forward.
"Because, I know that some might stop us from getting to our target." Zeref said as he turned and walked towards a small throne in the bandit cave and sat down.
"Who is bold enough to go up against you my lord." asked the demon while Zeref looked at his demons remembering how many people wants him dead.
"Well for starters all of Equestria and there rulers, not to mention the villains as well." Zeref said as he looked at his demon. As he than reached into his coat and pulled out a single book.
"And in the villain book here, I'll need to send one powerful villain so the main characters can stop it and become more powerful so they can stop me."

So they can end your curse once and for all....

"But lord Zeref, what about those other humans? Some are even learning magic and friendship from that new formed school by the princess of friendship."
"You mean Twilight Sparkle? She may be a princess but she'll lose to my power." Zeref said as he than snapped his finger. "Let us see bring me the prisoners."
The demons nodded and walked off as cries of fear could be heard as the two demons dragged two ponys to Zeref and threw them at his feet.
The two looked up. A Zebra and a small yellow filly.
"Zecora and Applebloom."

OH NO!!!

Golden Fang Ryu Shenron

Golden Fang Ryu Shenron #11 · Apr 28th, 2019 · 2 · 2 · It Begins ·

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"I fear that a new war is on it's way, with the dark wizard Zeref." Luna the night goddess said with a bit of fear and held the most serious expression that anypony alive would see. "We face a completely different threat that would slay us all within days." she said once more.
This shocked everyone, how could the end of Equestria is nearing? Many thought on how powerful this Zeref creature was, that somehow escape tartarus? This news shocked everybody to the core in the room Fluttershy was almost bursting into tears if not for Rarity who held her in a warm embrace.
"P-please t-t-tell me it's n-not t-true." sequeled Fluttershy with tears dripping from her eyes.

Sorry Flutters, but it us....

"This can't be!" roaed Lance who stepped forward to the princess with fire in his eyes while his claws dug into the ground below him. "This must be some sort of sick joke!"

Eenope, it most certainly is not.

"It is not, i fear." Celestia said while she looked down, her eyes filled with hopelessness. "This foe, is like nothing you have ever seen or faced before." she said as she trotted over to her former student. "This...creature is like a monster with a never ending thirst for blood." the sun goddess said with even more fear in her eyes.
"Pony princess is right!" Prince Rutherford the yak stated. As his deadpan stare turned into one of regret and pain. "That monster! Kill many Yak! Yak can't fight it even with big numbers!" this new information made the seven ponys more shock lossing all hope at this point. Luna then stepped forward looking at the main six.
"That is why we must use the elements! With thu power of friendship we'll win this war by stoning the horror forever!" yelled Luna in her canterlot voice.
"Y-yes princess Luna! We'll not fail you!" yelled Twilight who also used the canterlot voice.

You guys can do it, I know you can!!!

"Where is it! Where is it?!" yelled Twilight as she ran to the nearest book shelf looking for the book.
They just had gotten yet another letter from Celeista that the pillers and StarSwirl would be meeting with them at her castle. In the letter it also said to get the book of Equestria's history book.
While the princess of friendship looked threw out the library Starlight and Spike were shock at the news, about the up coming war.
"So, does this mean school is canceled? Send all the students home?" Spike asked while Starlight nodded.
"We'll need to send them all home, to be with there family's, we can handle what's coming next! I hope." Starlight said as she walked out of the throne room along with Spike.

No need hive innocent civilians involved in this.

A guard in gold armor walked into the throne room before bowing. "Your highness, King Jack, StarSwirl and his party is here." said the guard. As Twilight nodded.
"Please send them in! You can go back to your post." Twilight said as the guard nodded bowing once more before walking off as King Jack the king of the deer kingdom walked in in his royal armor with two guards and the pillers next to him.
"Princess Twilight Sparkle, a honor to meet you." the King said bowing to her as Twilight did the same. After they all got to know one another they all sat around the throne table looking at the map and the book that Twilight had just found.
Watch this than read the rest of the story please. https://youtu.be/cXLwgFCcUdc
"Alright now that we-" StarSwirl was cut off by a set of doors being slammed open as a guards men ran in.
"Your highness! There's a problem!" yelled the guard's pony. StarSwirl glared at the guard pony and slammed his hoof down.
"What is it?! Can't you see we are in an important meeting!" yelled StarSwirl as the guard's man nodded.
"Y-yes sir but we have an intruder! And-" the guard's men was cut off as the place all over ponyville flashed with many lights all over the village, castle and school before a long pause than it all at once blew up into flames.

Oh no, HE'S HERE!!!

As the buildings all fell apart into the guard as screams of horror could be heard as everything went up in flames the buildings all falling into the earth.
After the rumble settled down a groan came from the fallen castle as Twilight slowly stood up holding her head as blood dripped into the floor from her nose and head.
Looking to the side and seeing Starlight who was not far from her laid as Twilight groaned. "Starlight, get up. We're under attack and i can't do this alone." Twilight said as she slowly stood and walked over to Starlight and picked her up. "Starlight? Oh my Celeista, she's dead."

D-d-d-ddead?!

!!!

Twilight said as she gently placed the body on the floor looking around seeing many bodys of guards and her friends than she heard a groan and her name.
"Tw-ilight." said a injured StarSwirl who's lower half was crushed under a huge piece of the castle.
"S-starSwirl?" said Twilight as she fell to her knees looking at the wizard.

Twilight...STARLIGHT!!!!

"Twilight, we're not out of danger." StarSwirl said as a hand slammed his head to the ground as Twilight went wide eyed. A what looks like a man with a yellow furr ears and tail with sharp teeth and claws stood above StarSwirl.

JACKAL!!!

"Your not supposed to be alive! The other's played along but I guess you'll need some conversing!" the demon said with a crazy rough voice as he looked at StarSwirl his hand glowing as StarSwirls body began to blow. "Explosions."
"Let him go you monster!" yelled Twilight as StarSwirl looked at Twilight.
"Twilight. Run. There's no reason for you do die with the rest of us!" StarSwirl said as Twilight closed her eyes tears falling into the ground.
The demon than looked up at Twilight. "The names Jackel by the way! One of the nine demons of Tartaros! Tell that to your friends in hell!" he said as Twilight shot her eyes open once more as StarSwirl closed his eyes.
"Run now! Find what justice means to you and protect it until the every end! That's an order!" yelled StarSwirl before the explosion spell activated.
"STARSWIRL!" Twilight yelled before the place were the two were exploded once more.

NOOOOOOO, STARSWIRL!!!

CroisSunnyPlay

CroisSunnyPlay #12 · Jul 15th, 2019 · 4 · · New Allies ·

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Look, just... Slow down this fic. Things are progressing in a way that leaves us with no story and just confrontations, which can make anyone confused by what's happening, and it's also full of grammar errors.

There's a lot of questions that could have been answered to at least give some content here. For example, how did Zeref end up in Equestria? Was there a specific reason he started his quest to end all life? And some others.

And lastly, there's the fact that you're straight out copying/pasting the exact same things that happened in Fairy Tail for some sections. The scene with Twilight and Starswirl for example, was the same thing that happened with Doranbolt and the sage.

Don't get me wrong, I like the idea this story has, but it's kind of a turn off from all these points I made, and that's coming from me how am not that good of a writer myself. My suggestion is to put this on Hiatus and take some time to read a few fics with an idea similar to this so you can have an idea on how to make this better.

Hope you don't take this the wrong way, I just want you to improve as I really like this idea you had.

Ryshinki

Ryshinki #13 · Aug 3rd, 2020 · · · New Allies ·

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Nice story, please update soon.

DisplacedWriter

DisplacedWriter #14 · Oct 11th, 2021 · · · New Allies ·

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...did I cross-over with this story or am I thiking of some other black mage?

nightshroud96

nightshroud96 #15 · Jul 8th, 2022 · · · It Begins ·

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Twilight Sparkle the princess of friendship along with the other elements of harmony expect who was Twilight's student stayed back at the castle along the the young dragon spike who was like Twilight's little brother.

Not fond of how Spike missed out on directly meeting the royals and missed out on directly knowing the news all due to they made him stay behind...

Is he still alive..?

nightshroud96

nightshroud96 #16 · Jul 8th, 2022 · · · New Allies ·

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Will this continue?

Not liking how Spike got taken out like that..

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