• Published 11th Mar 2018
  • 1,382 Views, 26 Comments

Devils in the Details - Myrlin



Twilight Sparkle a student at the Canterlot College of Magic has summoned Rarity a creature of magic for a research paper. The contract is set to a year and a day how will these days pass with in the magical bond these two mares now share?

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Honey tea and apricot jam

This is something I have been working on for a while and I already have a lot planned, so please keep supporting me with likes and comments and if anyone wants to send me asks or messages I am very active on tumblr at Pastel-pony-pictures.tumblr Thank you for checking me out!


“Alright so just to check the order we have the opal and mother of pearl necklace and the silver and amethyst tail cuff with matching earrings right?” the light blue pegasus asked, her Manehattan accent still lingering in her voice. The question was directed to her client a light gray unicorn mare with violet perfectly curled hair who was busy looking at the wonderful pieces on display for the 10th time.

Distractedly the unicorn continued to look at the showcase for a moment before popping back to the conversation with a giggle. “Yes Sunny that sounds wonderful! And you said i can come back in two weeks to pick them up right?”

“That's correct miss Cashmere Kindness! Your order will be sent this evening so unless you have any questions I'll be seeing you then!” Sunny Streams said brightly putting away the order under the counter and beginning the process to close the shop.

“Have a great rest of your week Sunny dear!” said Cashmere grabbing an evening cloak with her ice blue magic, draping it across her back and walking out of the boutique into the just setting sun.

Canterlots merchants quarter also known as the Sun District was becoming sparse this time of day with shops closing soon. The summer was coming to an end and the cool air send shivers down the unicorns spine, even the sheer evening cloak provided little protection. The Running of the Leaves would be soon beginning the magical change to fall and the cold descent into winter.

Trotting down the empting street she pulled the fabric tighter against her shoulders with a touch of magic, her cloven hooves echoing against the cobblestones. Cashmere Kindness was one of many names she was addressed by, but a personal favorite for Canterlot known especially well in the fashion and jewelry shops.

Though some would say she was small on average for a unicorn seeing her walk head held high, confident in her steps you would think she was as tall as a Princess. Not to forget the ridiculous lie about her being more stubborn than a diamond dog but in reverse the exaggerated rumors of her great acts of kindness, which were grandiose but true, everyone of them.

Just as her mind began to wander to her next designation a feelling she knew very well overcame her. With a pause and sigh Cashmere looked around quickly finding her alone in the descending twilight as she ducked into an alley void of windows.

Taking a moment she closed her eyes and steadied her breathing. Before accepting the call a smirk crossed her lips and a whisper escaped.

“Gotta pay for that new winter ensemble somehow, right?”

The magic pooling and swirling beneath her hooves kicked up, wrapping about her form beginning the physical and mental rush that came with transportation magic. Idly as the magic enveloped her she wondered who could be doing a general summoning spell for level two classifications and for what reason? And would this be a good or bad job for her?

Time tells everything darling.


With more force than necessary Twilight Sparkle stuffed a textbook into her saddle bag with magic, then carefully righted it next to the others feeling bad for taking her frustrations out on an innocent book.

What kind of professor! To say the book written by THE Moondust Glitter on the Academic Applications of Lunar Phases on Magical Expressions was DATED! DATED?? How dare he?! Next he will say Starswirl is dated. That crotchety old unicorn, Granite Stable would be the death of her. Or she would be the death of him with the heated debate she kicked up during his lecture going over the syllabus for this semesters curriculum.

Though Twilight was a first year she held some strong beliefs. Feeling some small shame she made a note to herself to not cause such a scene throughout the rest of the year, for his heart at least.

With a deep sigh Twilight breathed in the lingering summer air as she entered the large quad in the center of the campus. Once again she remembered how happy she was to finally be a part of Princess Celestia & Princess Luna’s Lyceum of Magic and Science, also called Canterlot College of Magic and Science. Though she had received offers to join other institutions it was no question where she would go. It had been her dream ever since learning of it and also after meeting both Princesses.

Taking a seat beneath one of the grand oak trees dotting the quad she took out her schedule to see which class was next which was luckily an hour from now, but as the wind shook the boughs of the tree scattering leaves so too did her thoughts drift.

Luna and Celestia. Long long ago when she was younger Twilight had issues with her magic, either too strong or not at all. She was adept when it actually worked but usually her spells ended with a bang or a whimper if anything happened at all. With her teacher Quartz Moon’s last effort she requested an audience with the Princesses little Twilight in hoof.

Celestia and Luna personally advised and sometimes taught at the Canterlot School for Gifted Unicorns, it was a great honor but only a few were picked every year from the local magic assessments across Equestria. Twilight on her try almost caught the stage on fire. And was not accepted obviously. But Quartz believed in her student and requested she be tested properly and if passing be allowed to enter the school.

And so Celestia gave young Twilight a task, to hatch a dragon's egg by using unicorn magic to mimic the magic and heat given off by a volcano's magma. It was a daunting task, even her teacher thought it was too much.

But Twilight agreed. Even now Twilight remembers the small giggle Princess Celestia gave hearing how serious the little filly was. So the Princess gave her the rules: Twilight would study with herself and Luna for a months time in the castle to learn all about the magic necessary to hatch the egg. If she could even cause a crack in its magical shell Twilight would be accepted into the School.

And so began a blur of days and nights with each Princess, learning theories and techniques of magic she had never dreamed of. During that month Twilight began a lifelong love of books and teachers of old, she felt as if they were speaking to her directly with each dusty tome. The Princesses even let her set up a guest bedroom an unused area within the castle library so she could study to her heart's content, with her parents permission of course.

Though time and time again, even after all her studying, while casting spells she came upon the same issue, no matter what she tried nothing worked.

After another failed spell Twilight remembered laying on the floor of her room past the point of despair, cries of frustration dead in her throat like she felt her dreams were. The unhatched dragon egg laid cold in the basket, mocking her.

That was where Princess Celestia found her. She didn't ask what was wrong, to calm her and stop the tears, no, Celestia quietly and softly laid down next to her struggling student. Not caring of protocols and etiquette Twilight buried her face within her teachers soft downy coat, for thats all they were at the moment a teacher and frustrated student.

Moments pass and even the sun begins to set, the soft yellow glow enveloping Celestia's horn cast a ring of light around the two in the darkening bedroom.

“Twilight, have you ever thought how it is we can walk? It sounds silly but bear with me, as a foal we are all able to walk within the hour of being born how is that? A being knowing nothing of themselves yet can control each leg and walk with surprising success. The same with pegasus foals, and unicorns. Soon after, they learn to fly or use magic isn’t it amazing?”

“So I-I can't even do something a foal can d-do?” A muffled whine came from Celestia's midsection where Twilights face was still buried. With a gentle smile she lifted a wing and draped it against her pupils small form.

“Not at all little one. You have grown and you have learned, so so much. You are one of the best students I have ever, ever had Twilight Sparkle.” As she spoke she nudged the small sniffling filly urging her to look up and as she spoke the final part of her sentence she lifted Twilight’s chin and held her gaze to emphasize how much she really believed in her.

Celestia’s eyes held so much love and confidence that it hurt Twilight to realize how much of those feelings she lacked for herself, her face twisted as fresh tears began to fall, newfound sobs wracked her body she held tight to Celestia’s chest. As her crying subsided and full dusk began colored the room her teacher spoke again.

“Twilight will you do an experiment with me please?”

Still sniffing Twilight nodded rubbing her nose with her foreleg.

“Let's get into the meditation pose Luna taught you, yes, the dream calling pose.” Both sat on their haunches bringing their hooves to meet barely touching as they lay their forelegs against their thighs. Both breathed in unison and gave a forceful exhale, with that Twilight had calmed and was ready as she could be

“I want you to think of the hottest day of summer you have ever experienced.”

“Like last y-year after the Summer Sun Festival?”

“Yes just like that one. Remember the heat, how it surrounded you like wool, soft and warm. Can you let the egg feel that too? No don't think too hard just keep the memory in your mind let it flow, imagine the memory as that wool blanket and wrap it softly, softly, around it. Remember the heat as it blazed the ground, too hot to walk, air shimmering in the sun, make it hot Twilight.” Celestia's voice had fallen to just a whisper as Twilight had too fallen into deep concentration.

The room they were in was beginning to heat as the magic Twilight was weaving leaked out, the egg began to glow, to warm, and Celestia's whispering continued as the last lights of the sun hit the back wall. “Hotter, hotter, feel the earth below the sun above, both are the same, the wool is now molten rock that lays beneath our hooves, the blood of the earth the blood of the sun!” Now her whispering was fierce and sharp matching the rising temperature, the egg glowed red hot below the magenta of Twilight's magic. “Now Twilight one last thing, breath in take in the power and heat you feel, take it deep deep in your chest, good.” A heart beat, then two. “Now blow out and breathe life out, wake the child.”

A loud crack echoed through the now dark room, the glow and heat dissipating, leaving only silence behind. Only with the second crack did Twilight come back to her senses eyes growing like dinner plates as she saw the fissure running across the speckled egg. With a yell she jumped up squealing different versions of ‘I did it!’ finally stopping next to her teacher, muzzle split in half with smile. Celestia on the other had actually seemed shocked, which in turn had shocked Twilight into calm.

“I did it right Princess? I managed to crack the dragon's egg so I can get into the school. Right?” Uncertainty colored her voice, she was worried she had done something wrong.

Coming to herself Celestia blinked a few times before looking down a Twilight fondly, opening a wing to hug her student. “Yes Twilight you did it! You can--”

Another crack echoed shocking both to look back at the egg, as it rocked in its basket pieces of shell shaking free as the being inside it too, fought to be free.

“Princess! Is it-is it really hatching?! I-I didn’t expect it to actually h-hatch!”

Shushing Celestia finally brought her wing down to envelop the shocked filly calming her. “It is hatching Twilight. Though cracking it was enough you’ve done a marvelous thing, your magic was strong enough to actually hatch it Twilight Sparkle.” Leaning down she brushed her cheek against Twilights bringing their horns to touch ever so slightly. Straightening back up Celestia looked down at her student smiling widely. “Would you want to be my personal student? Never have I seen a unicorn with such raw magic potential.”

Before Twilight could answer with an ecstatic YES the final and loudest crack distracted them both. There in the blanket lined basket laid a baby dragon, purple, green, and so very tiny. With a wine it uncurled and stretched its back arching a small claws grasping at air as it did so. As the stretch ended the hatchling looked up its large green eyes focusing on the first thing it saw, Twilight.

“Twilight we will talk later regarding you being my pupil if you will have me, but about this little one. I have a task for you, as I promised the mother of this egg long ago, please become their friend and teach them well. So as I will teach you, you will teach them in return, ok?”

As Celestia was speaking Twilight had slowly walked up to the small dragon who now held her hoof with its small claws. “If that's what you want of me Princess how could I say no?” the shock of the situation still was obvious in her voice but the look she gave first to the dragon then to Celestia showed her determination.

From then on Twilight and the dragon whom she named Spike grew up with Twilight and her family and joined her whenever she visited the Castle now under the guidance of the Princesses. Finally was allowed to join the School for Gifted Unicorns. Her dreams and much more had come true.

Under their tutelage Twilight learned not to force her magic to do what she willed; the way Luna explained it was that the river cannot be controlled, but it may be guided. “One must not treat magic like some sort of tool, it is a living thing, we must respect it, it is a part of us.”

When it came time for Twilight’s first day of school she had begged to not be treated any differently or for the other unicorns to know of her personal connection with both Princesses. She wanted to prove she was successful without any favoritism and to prove her worth.

Now years later she was found capable and accepted into the school of her dreams with her own strength.

As for Spike he was working on his training as an Ambassador of Friendship and Goodwill for Equestria and DragonKind. He was going to spend the fall and winter months there to learn more dragon culture and to better connect his two people. Being reminded of her best friend leaving for so long brought tears to her eyes, since he was born they had barely left each other's side, he was her little brother and she would miss him.

Before her thoughts could take on a more melancholy turn the bell in the courtyard shook her back to the present.

“Oh my gosh, ohmygosh! Its already 2! I’m gonna be late for my first day of class!!” Even before her cry was finished Twilight was already racing across the grass desperate to make it on time.


Finally the day was done Twilight thought to herself as she made her way to the new home she would live in until the school year ended, the low hanging sun at her back cast her shadow to fall across the soft pink doorway of the cottage. It was 2 hours until nightfall but already the air bagan to chill from the warmth of the afternoon sun now gone.

Like some students Twilight perfed to stay on campus versus renting an apartment or going off and staying in Canterlot proper. This small cottage used to be--she was told--the groundskeepers home but after the school built him a new one it was deemed fit to use as additional housing, which Twilight was fortunate enough to receive.

When she arrived two days earlier with all of her belongings Twilight was surprised to find the roommate who was going to share the home with her had made a change of plans, leaving the home only assigned to her until next year. That, the headmistress was very clear, was only due to unforeseen circumstances and that this was to be allowed only this time.

Though the thought of being alone for a year was daunting, Twilight wasn't worried, she was fortunate that the friends she made over the years both in Canterlot and Ponyville--where her parents had moved a few years ago--were also attending the school.

Pinkie Pie who began apprenticing at the bakery down the street from Twilight's home back in primary school was one of her first and definitely most exuberant friends. That friendship lasted even when Twilight moved to ponyville. Then when Pinkie came to visit she found the Sugarcube Corner made the best cakes she had ever tasted and asked to move her apprenticeship there to specialize in sweets, verses the breads she had been making in Canterlot.

Though the school held the title for Magic and Science, it had a large variety of classes expanding it to be accessible for all ponies and even non ponies. Pinkie was attending classes to learn of farming, to learn how things grow effect the taste, and food sciences to make as she said “Deserts so good it would even make Princess Luna forget to raise the moon!” to make new and intriguing sweets for all of Equestria.

Speaking of sweets Pinkie had dumped a bunch of her latest creations into Twilights kitchen only an hour after she had first arrived. Not wanting her best friend to go hungry she said.

Other friends included Applejack and Fluttershy with similar studies of agriculture, horticulture, and botany, with fluttershy also studying veterinary sciences and herbology. They both had a dream of growing Sweet Apple Acres as not only an apple farm but a wildlife clinic where Fluttershy would assist with rehabilitating injured wild animals.

Fluttershy’s best friend from Cloudsdale was also coming. Rainbow Dash would spend summers in Ponyville and had become close with all the girls too and eventually choosing to stay permanently in Ponyville. She was pursuing a field in combating extreme weather conditions, though the weather was controlled by Pegasi if done improperly or even on its own extreme conditions still manifested. Tornado, hurricane, blizzard, or flood, all were possible naturally but couldn’t be left to run rampant.

She wanted to join the elite team for that exact purpose under the Canterlot Royal Air Guard also known as the Wonderbolts. They were more than a trick show group, when Equestria needed them for natural emergencies the group was always first on scene to provide support and disaster relief.

So although Twilight lacked Spike or a roommate she wasn't alone. And now she had all this time to do what she loved most!

Study!

Ready to begin with full force she began by tackling something that had been itching to look into all day. She had already received the objective for her final paper in the class that was would be more than 70% of her final grade. This was Advanced Magic and Applications, so of course it would be intense, and Twilight for one was excited to begin already. She would prove to that Granite Stable that she was the best student he had ever seen!

Now what was the topic of this research paper? The summoning and studying of magical beings within a symbiotic magic relationship. Oh that was definitely advanced. Celestia’s familiar Philomena the Phoenix was a tier three magical creature just like the Wyvern Luna was bonded to called Selene, the Princess were one of the hooffull of ponies that she had met who were able to summon at that level. Starswirl the Bearded one of Twilights favorite ancient scholars being one of them with his mighty Lightening Bird Stormshock.

Summoning beyond tier one was unadvisable for who had not graduated from a college with certifications in magical studies, so making that the curriculum for a first year student was mildly surprising.

Well if he, no, wait, did he not? That senile old stallion had forgotten to put the stipulation of tier one only! Though Twilight wasn't adventurous enough to summon a tier three nothing was holding her back from a tier two! She could finally do something she had never been allowed to do under the tutelage of Celestia or her previous teachers.

With a snap Twilight stood up from the coffee table in the living area of her new home, the course syllabus drifting to the floor in her wake. No use thinking more on the matter as this was an experiment she felt confident in and the longer she waited in the school year the longer the possibility of the Professor finding his error changing the stipulations to level one only, then her chance was gone until she graduated. And she would not be stuck with nymph or sylph all year if she had an option speaking frankly.

Not that there was anything wrong with the lower level creatures but they were more, basic, in nature and truly not much for conversation. It was perfectly normal to see ponies capable of summoning to have a familiar around them as assistants for magical purposes or not.

Where as second level beings were much more intelligent, so it would be like having a roommate after all and thought of not being completely alone in this empty new home made Twilight feel a bit better, even though she denied anything close to that idea when talking to Pinkie Pie earlier that week.

With a giggle she raced off up the stairs to the second floor while grabbing all the supplies she would need with her magic. Closing the extra bedroom door behind her Twilight was ready to begin.

Like the first page in a book something new was always exciting!


As the summoning and transportation spell pulled at Rarity’s being she imagined she could feel every piece of hair in her mane and coat sway as the magic moved her from one place to another. It wasn’t pleasant but it wasn't a long experience either, like her mother used to say it only takes the time needed to stomp your hoof down 5 times and it would be over. Even wrapped in the swirl of magic Rarity maintained some type of form and as she always did lifted her foreleg up and down five times, counting to herself for each one.

Finally she felt magic that encompassed her only moments ago release and spread open like the blossom of a flower. The spell that altered her appearance that she wore on the streets of the Sun District moments ago also began to peel off. Rarity thought she did not look much too different from a normal unicorn but knew there were distinct enough changes to draw attention, which her kind did not always want.

The horn on her forehead changed from short and straight to curved like a crescent moon and her hooves changed too looking now more like teal cloven crystals than average hoof of a pony, she even--as odd as that sounds--became aware that even her eye had changed back into their brighter blue color with her striking slitted iris.

Finally the fading spell deposited her in the center of a magic circle, Rarity felt the sheer evening cloak fall across her back as she finally made contact with the ground. The energy that ran through the circle only seconds earlier was already fading, returning the arcane marks back to simple chalk lines upon the floor.

With a breath to balance herself Rarity finally opened her eyes to see who it was that initiated the summons. Standing across from her in another circle of fading light was a young mare wide eyed and slack jawed, who stared at Rarity as if she were a spirit--which was close but not the same.

The mare had a coat of soft lavender with a striking midnight colored mane that was streaked with purple and magenta, and with her matching purple eyes gave Rarity the feeling of looking at a field of violets, lavender, and lilac flowers. Oh with such a great color scheme she could whip this mare up the most beautiful outfits, but that would be for another time perhaps.

With a flick of her eyes she was able to see past the unicorn to the window behind her to see the final light of the setting of sun and the dark silhouette of a clock tower that looked very familiar.

So she had been summoned to the Canterlot magic college, which if she thought about it was not at all surprising given Sunny Streams only minutes before was talking of all the new students coming to the city for the school year that was about to start.

Rarity shook her head slightly giving a flip to her still perfectly curled mane as she straightened her neck and smiled slightly up at the young mage.

“Hello miss student, my name is Rarity I have accepted your summons as requested, how may I be of assistance this evening?”

Almost as if Rarity’s words had snapped the mare back to the present did she finally react. Explosively even, as she began to hop one hoof to the other fiercely whispering to herself different versions of ‘I can’t believe I did it.’ and so on. Rarity let her continue a moment before raising her foreleg and giving a delicate cough.

Embarassed the student calmed herself back to normalcy giving a meek smile as an apology.

“Yes! Yes, sorry about that! Hello Rarity, my name is Twilight Sparkle and I wanted to know if you were willing to help me with a project! F-for school! Obviously. Sorry. Uh...yes.”

With how flustered she was acting Rarity couldn’t help but giggle at the pony before her.

“A project dear? Whatever would you need me for?”

“I-its a project about magical beings, uh such as yourself, and to write about summoning and working with you in a contract. That kind of thing.”

As she spoke Twilight seemingly became more embarrassed with every word as she stared downwards and pawed at floor careful not to scratch the chalk marks.

“Wouldn’t that be a task more suitable for the lower class summons? You could of requested a breezie or a water nymph, would they of not sufficed?” Rarity would not of described her current emotion as annoyance but confusion instead, why summon somepony of her level, whereas a lower elemental would of sufficed.

The thought of being just some research subject did rub her coat the wrong way a bit, but she would hear the young mare out.

“Truly? I-I was excited to finally be allowed to summon somepony of your caliber and I thought it would be nice to uh make a new friend? If you don’t want to take the request miss Rarity I completely understand!”

Rarity believed Twilight could not become any more flustered than she already was but apparently Rarity was incorrect as the lavender mare seemed to shrink into herself like a filly being caught with her hoof in the cookie jar, and although Twilight was taller than Rarity herself Twilight looked up through her lashes at Rarity.

My she was adorable Rarity thought as she reined in the urge to giggle at the scene before her.

“How about this Twilight Sparkle, let us go over the contract you are requesting and I will consider it, hmm?”

“Oh. Wait, REALLY? You will? Thank you! Thank you sooo much!” Once again Twilight began hop for joy before becoming aware of the look Rarity was giving her, a small smirk with one eyebrow cocked up at the scene Twilight was starting.

Almost immediately Twilight halted her bouncing and slid her eyes away from Rarity and raised her foreleg to give a small cough acting like the outburst had never occured, obviously not, no never.

“The paper is due end of spring before the school year ends and that is about 7 months from now, since the two longest contract terms are in six month intervals in addition to a day, I was wondering if you would be ok with the year long option. Not to worry though the moment my grade would be received it would fulfill the requirements of the contract and would terminate on its own. And obviously if at any time you are unhappy you can sever the contract on your own, but you would not receive your payment.” Twilight spoke as if she was reading the contract in front of her word for word but Rarity noticed something and held back a smile, the contract was rolled at Twilight's hooves meaning she had memorized it completely.

“And what pay dear did you have in mind?”

“Other than the normal stipulations of me providing you lodging and food if you wish it, to share my excess magical energy with you, and I was also going to give you instead of bits if you want. Wait where is it, uh one second, let me find it.” Her ears lowered with annoyance as Twilight realized she had forgotten to bring out what she needed before the summons.

“Sorry! One second, I know exactly where it is.” And without a pause she dashed out of the room. Rarity could hear the echoing of her hooves going down the stairs, accompanied by what sounded like Twilight talking to herself. Like how could she of forgotten ‘it’ whatever it was and variations of such.

With a sigh Rarity sat on her haunches and resigned to wait in the darkened room that was only lit by two dimly shining crystals set in sconces on the wall. With a glow of magic she touched each one brightening the room up. No one wanted to sit in the dark now did they.

After a minute or two Twilight burst back into the room a cloth wrapped item floated with magic behind her. “I got it I got it sorry Rarity.”

“Oh not to worry dear.” She responded sweetly as the student returned back to the spot she was before.

“I got this from my friend Spike though I could tell he really liked it he wanted me to have it, but I don't think he would mind me giving it to you since this is super important.” Twilight said as she slowly removed layer by layer of cloth between the two mares, and she whispered quietly to herself “Not like he doesn’t eat things like this for dinner all the time anyway.”

Rarity heard what she said but did not at all understand the meaning but, before she could ask the item was revealed and the question died in her throat.

What laid in front of her was one of the largest crystals she had ever seen and she was very very knowledgeable about precious gems. With a tread of magic she could tell it was a sapphire of very high purity giving it the deep blue color that looked like the ocean. It was beautiful and Rarity was in love.

“So y-you were saying dear this would be paid upon the paper being graded and submitted back to you correct?” She felt herself lift her hoof to caress the hard facets of the sapphire but stopped herself, not now, not yet.

“Yes that's right! Are you going to accept the contract miss Rarity? Oh would you want this or bits instead? You deserved to be paid for your services of course.” Wide eyed Twilight looked expectantly at her guest as Rarity in turn looked down at the gemstone.

“N-no this will be fine, and I don't see why not to accept it seems simple enough. Oh and no more of this ‘Miss’ you and I are about the same age so no need for the formalities.” With a smile Rarity came to stand up shaking her mane out of her face as she did so. “So Twilight dear why don't we leave this dreary storage room and talk of our near future together hmm?”

“Oh. Oh yes so sorry! Lets go downstairs to the den and I’ll even make us some tea too!”

In a few quick steps Twilight made it to the door and held it open for Rarity then together they made their way downstairs. Before running off to the kitchen Twilight grabbed two sitting pillows from one of the many unpacked boxes still around and placed them next to the empty coffee table.

The living room was still baren only having the table a couch behind it and a barren fireplace before it, though looking around Rarity could still see the unassembled pieces of furniture making it obvious Twilight had just moved into this home.

Before she could inspect the area Twilight returned the tea she promised and much much more to Rarity’s surprise.

As Twilight sat beside her magenta magic carefully placed first a teapot still steaming, two cups with saucers, a dish with cubed sugar, a bowl of cream, a basket of scones, a container of honey, and finally a jar of preserves. The table empty only seconds ago was now covered in plates like a sunday brunch.

“Twilight Sparkle dearest isn't this a bit much?” Surprised as she was Twilight insead looked around the table wide eyed before looking back up to Rarity.

“Really you think so?”

“Not that I mind but I do believe it is quite a large spread for just the two of us.”

Twilight snorted and giggled to herself as she poured the tea for both of them. “My friend must be rubbing off on me, whenever we hang out our table looks like this. She was over just yesterday and brought the scones and the apricot preserves because somehow she thought I would study so much I wouldn't eat. Ha as if Pinkie.”

After taking a sip of her tea and sighing to herself Rarity felt like she had to ask. “Have you? Not eaten because you were too busy with studying?”

The purple unicorns ears swiveled back as she looked away sharply, a blush filled her cheeks before she looked down and took a sip of tea mumbling to something that sounded like ‘Maybe sometimes.’

Rarity couldn’t help herself she laughed. She laughed long and hard like a filly completely unlike her usual meek and quiet giggle that she hid behind a delicate hoof. Taking deep breaths she tried to calm herself though the threat of laughing still created a large smile across her muzzle.

“T-Twilight dear I’m sorry I don’t--” Snort “Goodness excuse me. Don’t know what came over me but you--your face--was just so funny!” Still trying not to giggle she attempted to distract herself by adding additional honey to her tea.

Twilight had what Rarity would describe a fake sour face, that look you made when you wanted to seem mad but you too, were trying not to laugh.

My that face alone almost Rarity to have another fit. To distract herself she decided to change the topic.

“Don’t you think it's a bit of a waste us having this lovely evening but with the fireplace barren and cold our first evening together? I think not!” It was easy to find the prepared and dried wood next to the hearth and just as quickly as she said it Rarity with her ice blue magic deposited them neatly and with a magical spark quickly started a blaze within the wood.

Soon the fire was rolling creating the snap and crack sounds of wood succumbing under fires touch. For a moment those were the only sounds in the room, not the clinking of tea spoons in cups or the chatter of two mares, no just the whispering of the fire casting a warm glow about the room.

After a particularly large crack of a log Twilight spoke lifting the blanket of silence that had covered them.

“Thank you Rarity,” she said softly looking at Rarity--azure eyes meeting violet--before looking back to the fire. The golden light dancing across her face made Twilight look ethereal, beautiful. “This really is nice.”

Quietly Rarity responded “Yes. Absolutely wonderful.” A flush crept across her muzzle as she gazed at Twilight's shining form, quickly she looked away and to herself blamed the warmth of her face on the fire as she took a long sip from her honey sweet tea.

Later as the evening crept on after they both signed the contract and Twilight began her preemptive questions for the paper Rarity could only think what she had gotten herself into, the taste of honey still lingering on her lips.

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Comments ( 26 )

Good start!
Keep going!

I’m going to look forward to this!! There is a section where Fluttershy’s name isn’t capitalized but it’s all good. You can fix it whenever.

The description is confusing me. Did Twilight summon Rarity, some random creature, or herself? :applejackconfused:

8790375
Nope Rarity is a magical creature like a demon and twilight summoned her :twilightsmile:

Off to a pretty good start. Love the idea! :pinkiehappy:

8790647
The question is why kind of mystical being?

8791050
Did you mean what kind? When I was first starting this idea it was more a demon AU and she would of been a succubus but I toned it down to just be generic magical

I have a guess on what magical creature Rarity is but I keep that to myself for now. Keep up the good work, I love this story already.

Congratulations on your first story being published! I'm loving it so far, and can't wait to see where this goes from here!

A decent start, and a novel premise! I've not come across Raritwi in the context of a summoner/summoned being relationship before. The worldbuilding details with different grades of summoned creature are intriguing, as well as the personal summons of the princesses.

If you don't mind some constructive critique, there's a few issues related to grammar and sentence structure that you may want to address. There's several run-on sentences which could be chopped up into smaller sentences or divided with commas to make them easier to read. For example:

After a minute or two Twilight burst back into the room a cloth wrapped item floated with magic behind her. “I got it I got it sorry Rarity.”

“Oh not to worry dear.” She responded sweetly as the student returned back to the spot she was before.

That could be reworked into:

After a minute or two, Twilight burst back into the room. A cloth-wrapped item floated with magic behind her. “I got it! I got it! Sorry, Rarity.”

“Oh, not to worry, dear,” she responded sweetly as the student returned to the spot she was before.

Nothing that can't be sorted by a session with an editor, however, and this is a promising start. Do keep at it. :twilightsmile:

8791753
Thank you so much for the praise and assistance! I haven't written fics in a long time so any critiques are helpful! :heart:

“So y-you were saying dear this would be paid upon the paper being graded and submitted back to you correct?” She felt herself lift her hand to caress the hard facets of the sapphire but stopped herself, not now, not yet.

Her hand...?? Wouldn’t it be hoof...?? Or did I miss something here...??

8792960
Whoops! It is supposed to be hoof, just me overlooking a mistake! Sorry lol :twilightsheepish:

8794222
It’s cool. Just thought I’d let you know! XP

Interesting, and it has potential, but I'd recommend to tone down on the info dump, though. Too much telling for too little showing, too much information we have no use for yet. Focus on the story your telling and only show what backstory is needed as it becomes relevant. The girls background could be revealed only when they appear, for example.

But still, I shall follow it and see were it goes.

8791380
Still doesn't answer the question. I don't think there's such a thing as "generic magical" creature.

So is she a demon, angel, changeling (obviously not), ect.? What creature is she exactly?

8810543
I completely understand what you mean. Its a secret for now~:raritywink: Its something that will be talked about later.

But in the world there are creatures of 'general' magic since the world is full of magic so abundantly.

Where is the fucking next chapter. (please I love this world. Give me more of this amazing poison)

Dude plz.....when will the next chapter be up?? It’s been months...

I have barely started reading, and already I feel sick from the lack of proper grammar and punctuation. If you haven't been writing for more than a year, then I suppose it's fine as it is; heavens knows I sucked at these things when I started writing fiction. As a small tip, try reading what you have written out loud, it might help you notice where commas should go. And do go over your chapters at least once after they're done, capitalising all Is,

Distractedly the unicorn continued to look at the showcase for a moment before popping back to the conversation with a giggle. “Yes Sunny that sounds wonderful! And you said i can come back in two weeks to pick them up right?”

and other things similar to it. Or, as some have done, get someone to edit your stories, or proof read them at least.

Many writers, and I do mean many, are, in some shape or form lacking. It can be their grammar and/or punctuation, it can be their liberal misuse of things like they're, their and there and it can be other things, however they (and as far as I can tell, you too) have great ideas - awesome stories that would be fun to read rolling around in their imaginations. There are only really two ways to get better at the technical side of writing stories, and that is education (self-taught or schooling) and experience.

Still, keep it up and maybe you won't end up like me: huge and awesome imagination, but little to no determination to use my experience within literature to write it down.

9147206
Not trying to grammar-shame, but from the long description, it's clear to me that the author doesn't have good control over the use of punctuation.

Is this just dead now??

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