Wandering Sunrise remembers Equestria as it once was: a land of harmony, broken by strife. She was sealed in a Stable-Tec stasis pod the day the Megaspells hit... and she wakes up in a pool of water, surrounded by strangers.
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Woohoo! New chapter!
I'll post the fixes below.
I heard him shout _owe_ and bump his head on the top of the box trying
My leg felt like it might be torn off if not for being held down _my_ Quick Stitch,
8791946
Fixed! and wow you're already 20% of the way in?
Kari still says hi.
8792086
Kari? Your cat?
8791958
Nope, I finished. Sunrise got her ass beat, burned and broken, tough little Filly. Glad to see a little more of Pinky and her insanity.
8792451
Next chapter Pinky goes to 11.
"my lungs filling with air, never have I been so relieved to heart my own heartbeat." hear for heart you can not heart your own heartbeat.
"Demolition Expert- You can now cook off grenades and other explosives to make them detonate precisely when it is most advantagous. You can also now modify explosives blast radius to up to +5 yards or -5 yards with the help of a workbench." I think you miss spelled advantagous. Needs to be advantageous.
Only two thing I found. So you and your editor are catching a lot more now.
I like how Sunrise and her friends came to odds over saving the pegasus. And Sunrise keep to her goal to keep them alive no mater how much they where a racist. Quick Stitch has turned out to be a lot of use. It true that a good team need a good healer.
8792131
Yes
8792959
Fixed these!
8794436
yays!
8792970
It's likely only get to worse as they go on and Sunrise keeps using non-lethal methods of combat.
This was a very battle packed chapter! and very interesting events and mental turmoil, I likey! keep it up!
8869637
I'm glad I can make ya smile.
Great battle scene, and I have a feeling that Black Hawk will be back. Didn't the Enclave consider members lost or contaminated after a certain time on the surface?
9130201
Yes they do.
Nice fanart! And a mine in the mouth, ouch. You know, given the Ensvlave's nature, always wondered how they would see pre-war pegasus that have survived the last day, similar to Sunrise.
9474531
I honestly don't know but we may yet find out.
Okay, somethings been eating at me for a couple of chapters now... Chifundo and the dual outfits. Is that zebra a Hermaphrodite? Or, a male transvestite? Or, do I have it all wrong, and He's a She, and 'butch'? Curious minds want to know.
Poor, poor Nyota. When Sunny finally gets around to Estrus, He's gonna be in for the ride of his life. (giggles)
Now as to box pony... well... Battle Saddle, probable Saddlebags, Pair of light machine guns, Armored Box... She's a walking mini-tank. And since the box is armored, and could support the weight. I don't doubt there are various and sundry items hanging from the inside surfaces for ready use. Plus, she seems to be the team's 'scrounger', judging by the small amount of time it took her to find an egg timer, suitcase, rig it for use, and get back to Sunny.
This is NOT the way I expected the story to go, and I am interested in finding out how things turn out. Sunrise keeps having these 'mind orb-like' memories popping up all the time. If that was the intent of Stable 43, it might be worth doing... to give ponies enough knowledge and experience to face a 'wasteland' upon exiting... But, I suspect the real reason was more sinister in nature.
From something Sunny's 'Pink' said, I suspect 43 was set up to create new versions of the Mane Six, complete with their Talents. And it looks like the only 'success' was Sunny getting Pinkie's tail, and some of her more 'abstract' abilities (the ability to zip here and there when excited, for instance).
On to the next Chapter!
the Frank Pony
Oh, Fiora...
When this is final and finished, it definitely needs an Editor's touch. Some statements, paragraph descriptions, etc, need to be looked at and re-written for clarity of awareness by the reader of what is being really said, why, and how. Also, I have detected innumerable misspellings and incorrect words used... like apart, instead of 'a part'.
The errors I mention are 'minor' for now, but when the work is complete, the entire thing needs to go to an Editor to catch and correct all of this before a final 'publication' version is released.
the Frank Pony
9590412
Actually this chapter has been heavily re-written for the book.
Remember these are still the draft chapters and haven't been updated but to give you an idea this chapter is: 15799
We deleted 819 words
and it came out to 16219 words
So there is around 1200 words of changes between this version and the version that went to print.
Fiaura
Interesting name for the enclave mare. Pretty sure that was an intentional reference. I’m gonna laugh if it’s revealed that her call for assistance goes along the lines of “Black Hawk down”.
9665631
You do realize that Fallout is Full of References and Wild Wasteland is in play ;)
As a big fan of explosives, and nuka-grenades, I appreciate seeing so many cool bomb designs.
what is she like a clone switching new bodies everytime she dies or something
10162434
I cannot believed I missed one, and glad you are.
10913555
No, none of those things.
Keep guessing!
Sunrise has been more adventurous during her first amnesia week in the wasteland if she has already fought the Enclave.
So far, her memories have been flash-backing in a chronological order. The second to last memory has been of her entering the stable. I was expecting to see the following ones to happen inside 43. But there isn't much we miss in terms of information. Sunrise has already summed it up a couple of times.
Since this chapter we had a flashback so recent, will they stop? They ran their course very well. I still feel unsated, in a good way. I crave to see more. We have been shown enough for a backstory, but there are still questions we might get answers to. What was her dad working on? Are her parents dead? I'm pretty sure they were executed shortly after parting with Sunrise. Why is she green? That's one I can't figure out yet.
We will see the answers in the following chapters, hopefully. Onward!
In Stalliongrad... mare mount you
11733913
Not wrong.