Wandering Sunrise remembers Equestria as it once was: a land of harmony, broken by strife. She was sealed in a Stable-Tec stasis pod the day the Megaspells hit... and she wakes up in a pool of water, surrounded by strangers.
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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9274199
Alguacil doesn't have his Glass Eye yet and the Spirit Gun isn't revealed to Sunirse in front of Sunrise until the battle of the Roof.
9270753
Again you are expecting stuff that hasn't happened yet.
9269602
#worthit!
9269167
Yes he is but that is part of the redemption for him.
This is Fallout 4 Ponyfied.
9334119
The idea of what our GM was running is:
Can we write a better Fallout 4?
Can we make a better Pony version of Synths?
How does an actual individual from the old world without the 180+ years of interaction with the wasteland react to the waste?
If you think this, I think we're doing a good job.
Yes this is actually a tabletop game turned into written work ;)
All the characters are played by real people too.
9334120
...
What?
You know what, nevermind. It looks good, but i'll read it later.
9334124
The game is written from Dead Tree's RPG system run by one of their devs. We live stream it on Wednesday night. I take what is streamed, break it down, add the in between game actions that aren't seen on stream to it. Then publish it as written work that you see here.
Also sorry if I weirded you out a bit. I realize I just finished the adding of that information to the Author's notes in chapter one.
I guess I look forward to your thoughts later then.
9334160
Don't worry, I give every story a piece of my mind when i read.
9334215
I shall temper my ego and prepare to be humbled then.
9334217
a side note.
Some will be good, others.... not so much.
truly it depends on what I have read during that chapter. I'll also quote things I find funny.
9334230
I look forward to your opinion, because with traveling pony museum publishing this with me, I want to hear some analysis by fresh eyes.
I have to say with character pic art you had done and fan art you did not add a picture this time. At least i thought you slip in there the cover art of you up coming book of the story. Anyway I know you behind on the story do to all the con you been to last few months. But nice to finly get back to readding another chapter. Ohh I have been waiting to say this. "Filly Scouts rule."
9334239
Alrighty
9334264
Added those in.
... Vines and roots sprouted from "every" orifice......
How well "armed" they were........
The last sentence is (in my opinion) off.... Possible rewrite.... "Many more drugs"......(just my opinion)
You may have wanted to say ..Who is they.... okay here we go again.... Wandering Sunrise is more intelligent than that display.... In my opinion... You may want to use "Who are they?"..... Just saying..
First sentence...in "seconds and" turned into ashes.
Okay made it to the end! Neat chapter! Dang cliffhanger anywho..... Hope you don't mind the "opinionated" rewrite comments. Just a grumpy old man as you already know.... Have fun!
9336902
Those help, provide all the re-write comments you want.
9336858
Got it.
9336829
Modified.
9336815
Yep.
9336781
Mr Numbers is great at overall picture but sometimes he misses the little things.
Any others?
9336902
You won't be waiting long.
Man, I have so many stories going on that I forgot how long it had been since the last chapter. I liked the improvised molebomb Good shit
9337363
Be prepared, next chapter is already under edits with MrNumbers and he's quick!
Nice cliff hanger! In the belly of the beast,,,,literally!
9339808
Wow someone knows the next chapter name.
9339829
Or just a good guesser
Nice Cover! And not Today, Sunrise.
Ya know I was actually gonna say that the word “rage” was used quite liberally to describe Sunrise’s scope of anger whether it be as simple a “mildly frustrated” to drastic as “righteous fury”. Sunrise was experiencing rage for things that only warranted mild annoyance in response. However I suppose that revelation she experienced after her hulking out on that ghoul makes sense now.
9699189
She is starting to have her little cracks and breaks in the wasteland.
Ah yes, explosive indigestion. That manticore was killed with such rancor.
10020132
Okay ya know what; I'll give you that pun.
you spent the last chapter trying to avoid sex with nyota, and now you're about to die filling a wet hole! oh, the irony!
Favourite writing boo-boo in this chapter:
spin > spun > spun
There was quite a bit of fighting in this chapter. The tree pony at the beginning reminded me of the episode where Zecora was turning into a tree herself. The molorats were a minor threat, but the manticores... They didn't seem hostile, like they were just going to feast on the molorats until Sunrise instigated a fight. Her fault, honestly, didn't even check EFS for red pips. Now she is at a death's maw and I am starting to wonder if we will see her die for the first time. No spoilers though! She is small and packed is such heavy armor that I think she could be an honorary box pone. Even if the manticore gets her in its mouth that would be quite a jawbreaker.
11786939
I hadn't thought of her armor creating a jawbreaker shell for larger creatures, when I get to finishing this year if this happens again; I should make it like that because well it's now SPOILER layer thick of different armor types.