Star Swirl the Bearded is freed from over 1,000 years spent in Limbo, but a dark presence is released with him. So he decides to be a complete jerk about the whole thing.
I mean. I can't really agree with Sunset there in the bar. I know that's how people want to see it, especially since everyone's a villain-apologist in the fandom. But if you see some dude grabbing the source of your super-mojo without asking your first thought shouldn't be "maybe the little guy needs hugs" it's "holy fuck that fucker's 'bout to stab me in the back!" otherwise chances are high you wouldn't live that long.
8846182 Other characters would probably be more sympathetic to the Pillars. Sunset (and Starlight), would have somewhat different opinions on the matter. That being said, that doesn't mean that they're right in 100% of cases, just that the franchise does love to throw these tragic backstory unicorns at us.
8846182 I think Sunset's angle in the bar was more that the immediate response from the Pillars should not have been to flick matches at Stygian until he cried, wet himself, and ran away, and then banish him to a hell-dimension because he wouldn't get off Star Swirl's lawn.
Seriously, I get that getting angry at him for taking their stuff was probably the appropriate response, but there is no way anyone can deny that everything the Pillars did to him after that was completely disproportionate. He's bothering ponies around him with terrible music, and the solution they adopt is to basically murder him. And the only reason he's even doing that is because they destroyed his self-esteem and shit on him (maybe literally, for all we know!), when he's the one who got them altogether and may well be the one who is actually responsible for keeping Equestria from being destroyed by the Sirens.
There is no version of the events in this story where the Pillars are not to blame for literally everything that is happening right now.
8846198 To be fair, this story has played up Starswirl's jerkishness quite a bit, so as meta-commentary for the ep, I can see how Sunset is maybe being a tad unreasonable here at least in that she's not really letting the Pillars better explain themselves, but given her past, of course she's going to take umbrage with how Stygian was treated. Even without the backstory provided in related fics.
That being said, I kinda felt Starlight in the episode proper was really underplaying just how wrong Star Swirl's plan was. She did say the line about herself being banished if Star Swirl was around, but she really only fires off a few lines here or there to try to convince Twilight... though, the fact that its Starlight and she's probably not super great at dealing with these situations still might follow.
To be fair, at the time that I was pointing out, she didn't know that's what happened, so that can't really be used against my point. And just 'getting angry for taking your stuff' is something you do over like, DVDs, or your phone, or your pogs or something. But the magical artifacts that allow you to move mountains and defeat incredibly powerful eldritch beings, generic anger is not the stop. He stole the nuclear launch codes and left town. What do you do with these magical artifacts which they use as weapons? Well, you defeat powerful beings with them... you destroy things with them. Someone steals them, regardless of WHO, your first thought should be that they are going to use them for their purpose - defeating powerful beings/destroying things - and the fact they stole them doesn't lend any faith to that being in the service of goodness and justice.
It seems they lived in a time period where you couldn't afford to be an idealist. The desire for power is all-corrupting, it is said, and they likely lived (we know for sure at least Mistmane did) lives that proved this to be true, where someone who took power for themselves was going to become the next foe for them to defeat. Going back to Mistmane, the pony we know of who did this to her was her friend. Just like Stygian. So assuming your friend would never steal and abuse your magical super-whammy doodad is off the table since it's likely happened to all of them multiple times. Stygian would be no different to them if this is the case, a friend who went mad with (for) power and had to be put down.
In this instance, Starswirl and the Pillars were right to suspect that this is what was going on. Could everyone involved have handled the situation better? Definitely. Starswirl of this story is, as ever, a beard with a jerk-ass hanging off of it. Even before we ever saw him in the show Celestia pointed out he didn't understand friendship as well as Twilight, and honestly Twilight wasn't the world's greatest friend even by the time she got her wings for being the world's greatest friend. So that's definitely saying something about Starswirl even in canon, but far more about this idiotic codger we all love to hate.
Stygian also could have done the right thing, canonically, and point out that he had a way to become of more use to them but that it would require their cooperation. Laid everything out, gotten their expertise on the issue, have his work double-checked. If everything was green, I don't see why they would have said no. Except in the case that we're talking about Jerkassverse, in which case the Pillars would be too drunk to care in order to not go insane from listening to Starswirl who would refuse simply because he didn't need another pony stealing his spotlight with their meager abilities and small intellect and lack of bell caps. ... You get my point.
Our perspective is as such because we know things didn't turn out that bad/we know already there was another way. Canonically speaking they had no idea of any of what we know and had to act on what they did know. Jerkassverse speaking, everybody is at least a little bit of a jerkass and that is its comedy, so we are meant to laugh at it. Which I do, heartily, because everyone is stupid in various ways and that's funny to me.
Oh, completely. You did a good job keeping everyone's individual perspectives straight, which feels like it could honestly be a bit difficult given the number of characters and their viewpoints. Characters can say whatever fits the situation and whatever they think - even act on it, but it doesn't mean they're as morally, ethically, or factually correct as they think. Because they have their own selfish biases.
That particular part was the few times where I used lines directly out of the episode. Order piping up is somewhat highlighting how far from the original I've strayed, I suppose, or rather, I thought the lines where of use even in this somewhat bent version of events, but some of the lines are kinda silly when talking around the dog who "sees all".
Sunset picking on Starlight though is all the fact that some of Starlight's lines are just kinda nonsensical even in context of the ep.
“They got smashed on grapes with Sunset and then she convinced them all to head out to the nearest bar,” Starlight said in an even tone.
I can't blame her.
“WHY ARE YOU STILL IN MY PRESENCE, EVIL ONE!”Star Swirl snapped.“HOW DARE YOU POLLUTE THE VERY AIR WE BREATHE WITH YOUR EVIL THOUGHTS AND MAREISH WAYS?!”
Stealing his cutie mark would take him down a peg, but it would only prove his point...
“Preposterous!” Star Swirl declared. “I’m the closest those ponies will get to meeting agodwhile living!”
They've met Celestia and Luna several times, Twilight studied under Celestia for YEARS and they're friends with FUCKING DISCORD.
Starlight’s face tightened. “Right, ‘hero worship.’ What did I say?”
World domination.
Order’s eyes crossed slightly. “Wait… where’d you even pick up that reference?”
Fuck you, that's where.
“Wha…No ‘Jamestown,’not Jaynestown,” Order shook his head, “Guessin’ Sunset isn’t shy about sharin’ some earth culture with you.”
Hey, good shit is good shit. I need to see Firefly one day.
“Well, an old, broken, obnoxious clock is right twice a day,” Order quipped.
Apparently.
Order and Starlight exchanged another glance. Starlight gave Order a small smile. “Well… there’s the second time.”
HAH!
Sunset looked at the mare to her immediate right. “Don’t worry! I know a resurrection spell…” Sunset’s turquoise eyes rolled up towards the top of her eye sockets as if searching her memory for something. “I think…”
You worry me.
“Oh! Tragic backstory time!” Sunset exclaimed. She smiled to herself and leaned forward on the bar, placing her forelegs down on it like a pillow for her head. “Go oooooooon~!” she warbled.
Always a good start.
Sunset’s eyes widened as the words, ‘Don’t be a unicorn! Don’t be a unicorn!’Repeated over and over inside her head.
Has a pegasus or Earth pony ever tried to take over the world? And have we had any good Earth Pony antagonists, barring Suri?
Above the ponies, a trio of massive aquatic-looking creatures with pony-like features, massive fish-tails, and teeth that would make a cutlery drawer envious floated above the ruins of a city.
Ah, those 3.
Aria rolled her eyes. “Oh, whatever, Adagio. I just want to figure out what Lady Gripes-a-lot is mad about now.”
Hey, that's pretty good.
“WHAT?!”Adagio snarled.
... That's also possible.
With that, the tiny village redoubled its efforts in going all TV-Y7 version of Kingsmen Freebird on each other.
Stygian nodded. “Right, right. All very valid points. Well, he is the living personification of all things wrong with Equestria, but right now, he’s right about one thing. These Sirens need to go, and we need your help to get it done. For five minutes, please just ignore everything this stallion says that’s spiteful, derogatory, and all-around unpleasant while we deal with the greater threat at hoof… After that, you can kill him.”
Even HE doesn't like Starswirl.
Sunset stared blankly for a moment, her back straight after hearing the tale, her eyes unusually focused. After a few more moments, her eyes narrowed. “Maaaaaaan, fuck you guys.”
Yeah.
She shook her head in a slightly exaggerated fashion causing her fiery red mane to sway one way than the other.
ThEn the other, Justice.
“Well, Star Swirl is quite the bitter pill to swallow,” Flash Magnus said, “but he is clearly the wisest amongst us.”
Because you're DRUNK.
Mage Meadowbrook pursed her lips into a small frown. “We tried, but Star Swirl only gives the three of us girls a collectiveonevote, Rockhoof and Flash Magnus one each, then ten for himself!”
Of course.
Oddjob’s body seemed to relax slightly, and she let out a small titter. “Believe me. I will.”
I don't think she's gonna forget after dealing with you.
“Try to keep up,” Sunset said before she blew out all four drinks with a single breath before drinking each down in rapid succession.
Considering the alcohol in you, I'm amazed it didn't make it worse.
Twilight nodded. “In case of cosplay emergencies.”
Why am I not surprised?
Twilight’s face suddenly lit up enough to shame even one of Rarity’s Hearth’s Warming displays. She began to nod vigorously. “Oh, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes!”
Goddammit Book Horse.
Fluttershy nodded. “Oh goodness, yes. On account of how fucked up everything is.”
Something about hearing Fluttershy say that amuses me to no end.
Her face making the same expression as Starlight’s, Rarity’s head also tilted so fast that cartilage let out a crackling protest. “Seeing one of my best friendswearthat horrid ensemble has likewise filled me with a wave of anger I have never known.”
Makes sense.
With a flash of blinding white light, Star Swirl appeared, his hat and cape now grey, but no-less covered in golden bells. “Behold, fools! I bring you theElements of Harmony!”Star Swirl declared as the six symbols of Laughter, Loyalty, Honesty, Generosity, Kindness, and Magic orbited around Star Swirl’s hat, held aloft by his magic.
They know. They've used them before.
“Yo! Yo! Yo! Yo! Sunset in the giant crystal HIZHOOOOOUSE!”Sunset Shimmer bellowed as she swayed, stumbled, slipped, and staggered her way into the room, the five Pillars behind her in an onlyslightly betterstate.
Don't think I've seen anyone that plastered in a while.
Rockhoof grinned, his steps notably more wobbly than normal. “We drank, we fought, she made her ancestors proud.”
That'd do it.
To the left of Oddjob, Luna shot the mare a somewhat concerned look then turned towards Celestia. “Sister, I feel we’ve left this situation go unchecked for quite long enough.”
Agreed.
“Tia, stop being in insufferable douchecanoe!”
That's a thing now?
“Dude! Have you MET me?!” Sunset exclaimed.
She has a point.
Twilight gave Sunset an unamused glare. “Starting to wish I hadn’t…”
... Ouch.
Without warning, Twilight found herself wrapped on Sunset’s warm, booze smelling embrace. “Oh, Twilight…” Sunset murmured as she hugged with forelegs and wings. “You’re just so… sooo… so awesome. Why can’t you see it?”
This would be infinitely more touching if she wasn't smashed.
Twilight’s face contorted in irritation. “Okay, are you doing drunken confessions or are you playing me right now?!”
Sunset broke the hug and smiled. “Little from column ‘a’, little from column ‘b’!”
Why does that not surprise me.
With a crimson glow of her horn, Star Swirl was suddenly airborne, and with a flicker of her magic, he soon found himself hitting a crystalline wall as his body went rag doll where a portal above him opened and hundreds of newspapers fell out to bury him.
Stop talking, old man.
“Sunset!” Twilight exclaimed. “That’s too far!”
I disagree VERY vehemently! He's been nothing but a sexist, useless asshole this entire time!
“Er,” Rockhoof began, “mayhaps we were a bit hasty to agree to Star Swirl’s first plan...”
Very.
Starlight spoke up, “I’m not sure whether to laugh or commit a murder.”
Commit a murder while laughing?
“Which time?” Rainbow Dash asked.
I love Rainbow so much. She's great.
Mistmane pursed her lips slightly. “Well, Stygian wouldn’t bedead, exactly. Just trapped for all eternity in a dimension devoid of all substance with only his sad, tortured thoughts to keep him company…”
That's worse.
Pinkie grinned widely. “Wi-fi, orTwi-fi?!”
Not now.
Pinkie grinned and shrugged. “Comedic convenience.”
Fair.
“Er… We all did,” Fluttershy added. “You two aren’t really whispering so much as having a loud conversation together…”
GOOD!
Sighing, Starlight’s horn glowed electric blue for a moment and gently shifted Sunset so her forelegs were pointed in the direction of her and not Twilight.
It's more Super Saiyan teal.
Rainbow Dash narrowed her eyes. “Okay, but the only way to take that statement is, ‘Your taste in musicsucks, Rainbow Dash, and you should feel terrible about yourself.’”
I wouldn't know.
“Oh,” Star Swirl said, “I only ask because I think your solution sounds adequate and not at all a temporary, at best, solution that’s essentially just absolving me of all responsibility and making a future generation deal with the problem.”
...
To everyone’s great surprise, especially Star Swirl’s, his eyes widened. “Strumpet… You… This might actually work!”
Is this the first time he's ever praised a female? Wow.
Star Swirl continued, “Perhaps if this works, you’ll deserve a small note in the history books, after my grand and glorious exposée! And that’ll be the closest I get to suffer being in your presence ever again!”
*Sigh*
The change to Twilight’s features was sudden but ever so slight. Her eyes widened, and though still smiling, her lips pulled taut. And unbeknownst to all ponies in the room, something behind Twilight Sparkle’s eyes suddenly snapped.
I have a bad feeling about this.
“That’s right, ‘oh,’” Sunset said. “That’s the look of a pony who just ran out of patience. That’s the look of a pony whose fresh out of fucks to give.” Sunset shook her head. “I was trying to get Star Swirl to do that, but he broke Twilight first and well… Forhissake, he better hope she’s not fresh out of mercy, too.”
Oh she is.
“What is it, boy?!” Sunset asked with mock enthusiasm towards the table. “Is that where little Stygian is hiding down a well?!”
This amuses me far more than it should.
Starlight raised an eyebrow in Spike direction. “Are youmethodacting here, or are you not getting enough attention in the castle?”
Eh, bit of both?
“The Hollow Shades,” Applejack said before she rubbed her chin. “I think a branch of the Apple family lives there.”
Wouldn't surprise me.
“Heeeeeey,” Starlight said cheerfully, “fuck you, weather station exploder,” she added, not so cheerfully.
HAHAHAAAA! The snark is amazing! I love your stories man, I really do.
Sunset raised an eyebrow. “It sounds like everypony has maybe been locked in a sort of statis, but okay.”
Let her have this.
“Right!” Starlight agreed. “It’s pretty much per primary modus operandi, and it usually WORKS!”
If it works, it works.
Rockhoof frowned. “Actually, Star Swirl threw lit matches at Stygian and called him names until he started crying, wet himself, and then ran away.”
Wow. I think that when Twilight finally explodes, it's going to be SPECTACULAR:
Sunset chuckled darkly. “She will. This is just the calm before the murder-storm…”
Oh I HAVE to use that line at some point.
“The Pony of Shadows was not interested in reconciliation!” Star Swirl declared. “Once a villain, always a villian.”
Try saying that to Luna's face.
Starlight got back up to her hooves. “It’s fine… I think I got this… I know Star Swirl is a guy who also uses magic and is of some renown.” Starlight couldn’t help but cringe at her own modestly offered sentence.
That hurt to say, Starlight?
“It is fine, Starlight Glimmer,” Twilight said in a near robotic tone. “Everything is going to be just fine.”
Oh dear.
“Now, friends,” Twilight continued, “if that is all, I would ask that you please leave me for a little bit.”
Oh this is going to end poorly. She's probably this close to exploding.
“Mama plays a queen on the hill built on a dream~”
Luna quickly thrust a hoof up and covered her sister’s mouth. “We can pay you your weight in gems to rebuild and keep quiet about this event until we get a handle on the situation.”
Celestia said nothing, instead opting to glare at her sister.
Oddjob thought about this for a moment. “Can I have her weight in gems?”
“HEY!” Celestia protested.
“Deal!” Luna exclaimed.
“What?! LUNA!”
Way to go, Luna. You just bankrupted the government.
8846493 Probably ... At least half the budget but at least it's not as bad as when she needs to be forced into a diet lest she needs to be carted around in a wheelbarrow.
So the government will only loose a metric ton of gems. Rather than several metric tons.
“Hehehe! WHOOOSH!” Sunset said as she flung her forehooves and wings into the air before falling backward.
Sniffling under the darkness of a bed only dimly lit by sunlight peeking into the room, Oddjob rambled on in a weepy tone. “And…and… she kept on screaming…. ‘HE IS NOT AN ANIMAL’… and… and…*sniff* she broke all my glasses…and… and… SHE BURNED DOWN MY BAR!”
You forgot to add a scene break (is that what its called?)
“Ya can’t sacrifice the Elements!” The sound of tiny doggy feet running up tiny stares was heard as Order appeared once more atop the table from the trap door. “Ineedthose,” he stressed. “Their magical powers arecriticalto the operation of what I do. The lightning bolt gives me electricity, the balloons give me gas to heat up the place, the diamonds give me water, for some reason, the butterflies are also my air conditioning, and the star thingy gives me wi-fi!”
Sunset raised an eyebrow in confusion. “Wait… “Wi-fi?”
Pinkie grinned widely. “Wi-fi, orTwi-fi?!”
“I’d groan if I wasn’t looking for my bags,” Sunset replied. Her head turned one way then the other as she scanned the room. “Wait…did I even bring a bag?” she asked.
“I gotcha, boo!” Pinkie said as she reached into her mane and pulled out a pair of saddle bags, handing them over to Sunset.
“Thanks, Pinkie!” Sunset said. “I’m not going to ask how or why you managed to do that!”
Pinkie grinned and shrugged. “Comedic convenience.”
“I said I wasn’t going to ask!” Sunset declared. With a scarlet glow of her horn, Sunset opened up her saddlebags and floated out a rectangular device that she held in front of her face. “Holy Christ on a bike! I’ve got a signal!And bars!?”Frowning, Sunset raised a forehoof in front of her face. “But no fingers, unfortunately.”
Sunset let out a groan. “I think I just died a little more inside…”
Applejack brow furrowed as she looked at order. “What does the apple do for ya?”
“Oh, that? Uh…” Order gave Applejack a terse frown. “You know what? You can have that one. I mean… it makes food, but only apples.” Order frowned slightly. “An unlimited supply of apples gets old pretty quickly.”
Applejack let out an annoyed snort. “Beginnin’ to think Rainbow Dash was right that knowin’ ‘bout ya brings no joy whatsoever…”
You know, watching this episode wasn't too bad. However, reading it kinda makes it confusing with the Twilight/Starlight and Sunset/Sunburst conversations. Regardless, fantastic MEGA chapter! I love the alternative personalities, and can't wait for the next one
Twilight was suddenly shaken from her stupor, her face lit up brighter than that time Rarity got into a Hearth’s Warming Eve decoration war with Vinyl Scratch and they almost burnt down the town.
"But it was so fabulous, Darling!"
Distant wubs bounce in the distance over the wailing screams of the Flower Sisters calling out 'The HORROR!'
I know I wrote that in the pre-read, but I felt the need to comment something, and it was either that or the reply-off TOM and I had with Sunset and Starlight going full LOTR on Star Swirl clones.
Twilight was suddenly shaken from her stupor, her face lit up brighter than that time Rarity got into a Hearth’s Warming Eve decoration war with Vinyl Scratch and they almost burnt down the town.
I don’t know if this was an actual episode or a fanfic on here, but I desperately want to see it.
“Heeeeeey,” Starlight said cheerfully, “fuck you, weather station exploder,” she added, not so cheerfully.
I don’t know why, but this line almost made me crap myself I was laughing so hard.
“I am absolutely doing that right now!” Order stated. “Do NOT run off on a bunch of time-wasting trips to try and find- Pinkie! I see you! Put down that map of Manehattan! Yes! Down, girl! Down! That’s a good girl!”
Sit, Pinkie. Sit. Good pony. : Bark
(If you get that joke, I luv ya.)
”Listen to Starli…Oh GODS, Starlight is the one talking sense! Batten the hatches everypony, it’s the buckin’ apocalypse!”
Yep, when Starlight is the voice of reason, you know you’re bucked.
I truly LOVE this chapter! Really hoping that there is a gang-bang ass kicking coming to Star Swirl at the end of this story. With gangster music playing in the background!
This is a wonderful work that makes me want to liberally beat the shit out of Starswirl. That last line though with the scream.....I think even Discord will feel that and have an 'Oh SHIT!' reaction.
8864870 Or better yet, he senses our interest and brings us in with popcorn, soda, and recording equipment for the inevitable destruction of Starswirl. Multiverse theory hopes at their best!
After all who doesn't like the idea of being able to watch the fireworks as Twilight makes it nescessary to make an entry in the dictionary for "pain", and "done goofed".
Comment posted by Noctis Prism deleted Apr 14th, 2018
8865032 We can only hope my friend, we can only hope. Though I think the best entry link would be for the word "dematerialization". Cause there will be nothing, even an ATOM left after that, or at least it won't WANT to be left and feel the pain.
Wow Starswirl is a phenomenal jerk. I kind of skipped most of the episode this is based on, but I think he would irritate me to the point of laughing every time he started talking as a defense mechanism.
As she unmade the very air around her.
Oh yay! Twilight's finally gotten into the grown-up version of magic. I've been wondering how long that was going to take. Oh wait, this is still fanfiction. Still, now at least a blade of photons forced into a solid by the internal pressure of the black hole from which it was conjured is at least feasible. Come to think of it, it's pretty funny how powerful magic can be made with modern knowledge of how stuff works. Sunset should be piecing together a truly monstrous power from her time in both worlds.
Sunset tapped at her chin thoughtfully as her lips twisted. “Huh… Kinda starting to wish my human friends had committed some borderline terrorist acts for situations similar to this one.”
Well, there was the time Pinkie Pie at a hospital took out two SWAT teams... which Sunset learned the details of back when she was researching her dossiers against the Humane 5. Might not have come to mind, though. And I suspect Sci-Twi did stuff growing up which could look even more dubious from a sufficiently removed and incomplete perspective, but the subject wouldn't have occurred to her to bring up either.
I mean. I can't really agree with Sunset there in the bar. I know that's how people want to see it, especially since everyone's a villain-apologist in the fandom. But if you see some dude grabbing the source of your super-mojo without asking your first thought shouldn't be "maybe the little guy needs hugs" it's "holy fuck that fucker's 'bout to stab me in the back!" otherwise chances are high you wouldn't live that long.
... Still, it's funnier this way.
8846182
Other characters would probably be more sympathetic to the Pillars. Sunset (and Starlight), would have somewhat different opinions on the matter. That being said, that doesn't mean that they're right in 100% of cases, just that the franchise does love to throw these tragic backstory unicorns at us.
8846182
I think Sunset's angle in the bar was more that the immediate response from the Pillars should not have been to flick matches at Stygian until he cried, wet himself, and ran away, and then banish him to a hell-dimension because he wouldn't get off Star Swirl's lawn.
Seriously, I get that getting angry at him for taking their stuff was probably the appropriate response, but there is no way anyone can deny that everything the Pillars did to him after that was completely disproportionate. He's bothering ponies around him with terrible music, and the solution they adopt is to basically murder him. And the only reason he's even doing that is because they destroyed his self-esteem and shit on him (maybe literally, for all we know!), when he's the one who got them altogether and may well be the one who is actually responsible for keeping Equestria from being destroyed by the Sirens.
There is no version of the events in this story where the Pillars are not to blame for literally everything that is happening right now.
8846198![:twilightoops:](https://static.fimfiction.net/images/emoticons/twilightoops.png)
To be fair, this story has played up Starswirl's jerkishness quite a bit, so as meta-commentary for the ep, I can see how Sunset is maybe being a tad unreasonable here at least in that she's not really letting the Pillars better explain themselves, but given her past, of course she's going to take umbrage with how Stygian was treated. Even without the backstory provided in related fics.
That being said, I kinda felt Starlight in the episode proper was really underplaying just how wrong Star Swirl's plan was. She did say the line about herself being banished if Star Swirl was around, but she really only fires off a few lines here or there to try to convince Twilight... though, the fact that its Starlight and she's probably not super great at dealing with these situations still might follow.
Awesome. Also I love the Kingsman reference. Never knew I needed to see Colin Firth murder a building full of people to Freebird until I saw it.
Everyone ignoring Order part aside, this chapter was GREAT and exemplifies everything I'm loving about this series so far.
8846198
To be fair, at the time that I was pointing out, she didn't know that's what happened, so that can't really be used against my point. And just 'getting angry for taking your stuff' is something you do over like, DVDs, or your phone, or your pogs or something. But the magical artifacts that allow you to move mountains and defeat incredibly powerful eldritch beings, generic anger is not the stop. He stole the nuclear launch codes and left town. What do you do with these magical artifacts which they use as weapons? Well, you defeat powerful beings with them... you destroy things with them. Someone steals them, regardless of WHO, your first thought should be that they are going to use them for their purpose - defeating powerful beings/destroying things - and the fact they stole them doesn't lend any faith to that being in the service of goodness and justice.
It seems they lived in a time period where you couldn't afford to be an idealist. The desire for power is all-corrupting, it is said, and they likely lived (we know for sure at least Mistmane did) lives that proved this to be true, where someone who took power for themselves was going to become the next foe for them to defeat. Going back to Mistmane, the pony we know of who did this to her was her friend. Just like Stygian. So assuming your friend would never steal and abuse your magical super-whammy doodad is off the table since it's likely happened to all of them multiple times. Stygian would be no different to them if this is the case, a friend who went mad with (for) power and had to be put down.
In this instance, Starswirl and the Pillars were right to suspect that this is what was going on. Could everyone involved have handled the situation better? Definitely. Starswirl of this story is, as ever, a beard with a jerk-ass hanging off of it. Even before we ever saw him in the show Celestia pointed out he didn't understand friendship as well as Twilight, and honestly Twilight wasn't the world's greatest friend even by the time she got her wings for being the world's greatest friend. So that's definitely saying something about Starswirl even in canon, but far more about this idiotic codger we all love to hate.
Stygian also could have done the right thing, canonically, and point out that he had a way to become of more use to them but that it would require their cooperation. Laid everything out, gotten their expertise on the issue, have his work double-checked. If everything was green, I don't see why they would have said no. Except in the case that we're talking about Jerkassverse, in which case the Pillars would be too drunk to care in order to not go insane from listening to Starswirl who would refuse simply because he didn't need another pony stealing his spotlight with their meager abilities and small intellect and lack of bell caps. ... You get my point.
Our perspective is as such because we know things didn't turn out that bad/we know already there was another way. Canonically speaking they had no idea of any of what we know and had to act on what they did know. Jerkassverse speaking, everybody is at least a little bit of a jerkass and that is its comedy, so we are meant to laugh at it. Which I do, heartily, because everyone is stupid in various ways and that's funny to me.
8846196
Oh, completely. You did a good job keeping everyone's individual perspectives straight, which feels like it could honestly be a bit difficult given the number of characters and their viewpoints. Characters can say whatever fits the situation and whatever they think - even act on it, but it doesn't mean they're as morally, ethically, or factually correct as they think. Because they have their own selfish biases.
8846257![:twilightsmile:](https://static.fimfiction.net/images/emoticons/twilightsmile.png)
Glad you're enjoying it.
That particular part was the few times where I used lines directly out of the episode. Order piping up is somewhat highlighting how far from the original I've strayed, I suppose, or rather, I thought the lines where of use even in this somewhat bent version of events, but some of the lines are kinda silly when talking around the dog who "sees all".
Sunset picking on Starlight though is all the fact that some of Starlight's lines are just kinda nonsensical even in context of the ep.![:trollestia:](https://static.fimfiction.net/images/emoticons/trollestia.png)
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Maybe, after so many years together, he deserved at least the right to speak in his defense before the others casted judgement.
I can't blame her.
Stealing his cutie mark would take him down a peg, but it would only prove his point...
They've met Celestia and Luna several times, Twilight studied under Celestia for YEARS and they're friends with FUCKING DISCORD.
World domination.
Fuck you, that's where.
Hey, good shit is good shit. I need to see Firefly one day.
Apparently.
HAH!
You worry me.
Always a good start.
Has a pegasus or Earth pony ever tried to take over the world? And have we had any good Earth Pony antagonists, barring Suri?
Ah, those 3.
Hey, that's pretty good.
... That's also possible.
Man, that scene was so fucking cool!
Yes.
Even HE doesn't like Starswirl.
Yeah.
ThEn the other, Justice.
Because you're DRUNK.
Of course.
I don't think she's gonna forget after dealing with you.
Considering the alcohol in you, I'm amazed it didn't make it worse.
Why am I not surprised?
Goddammit Book Horse.
Something about hearing Fluttershy say that amuses me to no end.
Makes sense.
They know. They've used them before.
Don't think I've seen anyone that plastered in a while.
That'd do it.
Agreed.
That's a thing now?
She has a point.
... Ouch.
This would be infinitely more touching if she wasn't smashed.
Why does that not surprise me.
Stop talking, old man.
I disagree VERY vehemently! He's been nothing but a sexist, useless asshole this entire time!
Very.
Commit a murder while laughing?
I love Rainbow so much. She's great.
That's worse.
Not now.
Fair.
GOOD!
It's more Super Saiyan teal.
I wouldn't know.
...
Is this the first time he's ever praised a female? Wow.
*Sigh*
I have a bad feeling about this.
Oh she is.
This amuses me far more than it should.
Eh, bit of both?
Wouldn't surprise me.
HAHAHAAAA! The snark is amazing! I love your stories man, I really do.
Let her have this.
If it works, it works.
Wow. I think that when Twilight finally explodes, it's going to be SPECTACULAR:
Oh I HAVE to use that line at some point.
Try saying that to Luna's face.
That hurt to say, Starlight?
Oh dear.
Oh this is going to end poorly. She's probably this close to exploding.
This would mean more to me if I knew the song.
... Holy fucking shit...![:rainbowderp:](https://static.fimfiction.net/images/emoticons/rainbowderp.png)
I was gonna say "I highly disagree." And then Order said this
So instead I say, you're just straight up wrong.
*pulls out the popcorn and waits for the beat down via Twilight on the Bearded SOB* The part I have been waiting for! <3
HNGGG THAT CLIFFHANGER COMEON UPDATE SOON!
Oh, this is going to be GOOOD...
Way to go, Luna. You just bankrupted the government.![:facehoof:](https://static.fimfiction.net/images/emoticons/facehoof.png)
Ah
_________
Seriously love all of Luna's lines in this chapter. And I like the thought of super-ultra-mega pardons with glitter.
Awesome chapter.
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Probably ... At least half the budget but at least it's not as bad as when she needs to be forced into a diet lest she needs to be carted around in a wheelbarrow.
So the government will only loose a metric ton of gems. Rather than several metric tons.
You forgot to add a scene break (is that what its called?)
You already used this in the previous chapter
...Twilight has stopped giving fucks.
...next chapter as soon as possible please.
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Whoops. Thanks. Did a search and couldn't find it. I'll scrub it.
You know, watching this episode wasn't too bad. However, reading it kinda makes it confusing with the Twilight/Starlight and Sunset/Sunburst conversations.![:twilightsmile:](https://static.fimfiction.net/images/emoticons/twilightsmile.png)
Regardless, fantastic MEGA chapter! I love the alternative personalities, and can't wait for the next one
not nice knew you star swirl,
also if twilight kill star swirl can she give her self a pardon???
All I know is drunk, snarky, Sunset Shimmer is awesome.
"But it was so fabulous, Darling!"
Distant wubs bounce in the distance over the wailing screams of the Flower Sisters calling out 'The HORROR!'
I know I wrote that in the pre-read, but I felt the need to comment something, and it was either that or the reply-off TOM and I had with Sunset and Starlight going full LOTR on Star Swirl clones.
I don’t know if this was an actual episode or a fanfic on here, but I desperately want to see it.
I don’t know why, but this line almost made me crap myself I was laughing so hard.![:rainbowlaugh:](https://static.fimfiction.net/images/emoticons/rainbowlaugh.png)
Sit, Pinkie. Sit. Good pony.
: Bark
(If you get that joke, I luv ya.)
Yep, when Starlight is the voice of reason, you know you’re bucked.![:pinkiecrazy:](https://static.fimfiction.net/images/emoticons/pinkiecrazy.png)
I truly LOVE this chapter! Really hoping that there is a gang-bang ass kicking coming to Star Swirl at the end of this story. With gangster music playing in the background!![:moustache:](https://static.fimfiction.net/images/emoticons/moustache.png)
This is a wonderful work that makes me want to liberally beat the shit out of Starswirl. That last line though with the scream.....I think even Discord will feel that and have an 'Oh SHIT!' reaction.
Finally. FINALLY.
That...is the sound of a mare with no more patience left.
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I think it'd be one of the few times he shat himself out of fear. That or he'll pop in to give a good "I told you so".
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Or better yet, he senses our interest and brings us in with popcorn, soda, and recording equipment for the inevitable destruction of Starswirl. Multiverse theory hopes at their best!
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Maybe Luna will bring the popcorn, Discord can bring the cotton candy seats, and Celestia can bring the video recorder so everyone can watch the outcome over and over again.
After all who doesn't like the idea of being able to watch the fireworks as Twilight makes it nescessary to make an entry in the dictionary for "pain", and "done goofed".
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We can only hope my friend, we can only hope. Though I think the best entry link would be for the word "dematerialization". Cause there will be nothing, even an ATOM left after that, or at least it won't WANT to be left and feel the pain.
Wow Starswirl is a phenomenal jerk. I kind of skipped most of the episode this is based on, but I think he would irritate me to the point of laughing every time he started talking as a defense mechanism.
Oh yay! Twilight's finally gotten into the grown-up version of magic. I've been wondering how long that was going to take. Oh wait, this is still fanfiction. Still, now at least a blade of photons forced into a solid by the internal pressure of the black hole from which it was conjured is at least feasible. Come to think of it, it's pretty funny how powerful magic can be made with modern knowledge of how stuff works. Sunset should be piecing together a truly monstrous power from her time in both worlds.
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I said Starswirl, not Sunset.
Have I said that I love this story? Because I love this story.
Well, there was the time Pinkie Pie at a hospital took out two SWAT teams... which Sunset learned the details of back when she was researching her dossiers against the Humane 5. Might not have come to mind, though. And I suspect Sci-Twi did stuff growing up which could look even more dubious from a sufficiently removed and incomplete perspective, but the subject wouldn't have occurred to her to bring up either.