• Member Since 17th Feb, 2012
  • offline last seen May 17th, 2019

JustMoth


T

Set 100 years after the war with the zebras violently ended, this is the story of an unlucky trader who suddenly finds himself dead and his afterlife somehow tied to two strange ponies. He now has to try and figure out daunting questions such as:
Who are these ponies?
Why is he stuck following them?
How did this happened?
Where are his hooves!?

This fan-fic is just a third of a much larger story...
-Hear another side of the larger narrative with Fallout Equestria: Sounds.
-See the bigger picture, take a look at Fallout Equestria: Sights.
-Follow the progress of all three tales at the Sights Sounds Souls Tumblr(and ask Colt questions).
-See all the parts in one place at the Project Hub.

Chapters (11)
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Comments ( 89 )

well now let us all see where this goes. I have liked your previous crossed story lines.They were much more in tune with My Little Pony then Fallout, more stories of personal interaction then fighting, action, sacrifice, and legends.

911026 Thanks! :pinkiehappy: This one will be along the same lines, mostly because I can't write fighting, action, sacrifice, or legends very well (I fail at Grim Dark too). :twilightsheepish: Yet even MLP has a giant monster fights every now and then... :trollestia:

good chapter

914767 Thanks :pinkiehappy: but this is actually only a segment of the first chapter.:twilightsheepish: It's a self contained bit that dosen't actually show any of the main story line (kinda like the memory orbs in FoE) just so people could get an idea of the writing. :twilightsmile:

lol @ the whole fetch quest. Classic RPG stuff.

"After asking a friendly hobo for directions"
I see what you did there! :rainbowlaugh:

Overall, great stuff. I love your style, and can't wait for the rest :pinkiehappy:

Another great part into the project, I gotta admit I really like how we got a lot more detail into the entire project just from this chapter. Really helped explain a lot more about the previous two parts. It was amazingly written, and I can't wait to see what else is coming from all three mediums! Good luck!

Ok, so confirmed female, double clothing in the desert (to hide the mutation? certainly not to avoid the heat. Then again I know little to nothing of desert survival beyond "Take/Drink lots of water" and "Travel at dusk/dawn"...), and has possibly retained her personality (she changed the given name, which her "previous regeneration" did not like). Also possible she wanted to give herself a new name as she was starting over completely.

I like her new name.

Moth, it seems all links messed up in the conversion from GDocs. You might want to fix that :derpyderp2:

(on that note, that should be "whose constant encouragement" after No One)

1118467 Thanks, again! :pinkiehappy:
1118698 Well even if a picture is worth a thousand words, 7,000 words can tell more of a story. :twilightsmile:
1120026 Yay for speculation! Shows that the story is interesting enough for people to think about. :yay:
1121178 Fixed it (I think), thanks! :twilightsheepish:

1123389
You didn't fix my second remark:
> who’s constant encouragement
Should be "whose", otherwise it means "who is" :twilightsmile:

[edit]

And if I really turn up the nitpicking (which I should; you'll most likely be copying that part to the end of EVERY chapter), there's a double space in "My Souls editors"

I'm loving this. All of it.

wait when he said extra parts did he mean what I think he meant? Cant wait for the next

The mysteeeerious extra parts. Hehe :pinkiecrazy:


Well, the addition of Sights sure cleared up a lot. Death by tomato soup, lol. Gotta agree with Cookie though... how the hell do you not know your entire family is deadly allergic to potatoes and tomatoes?
Makes you wonder what happened to the doc though... he wasn't allergic, or killed by angry dying ponies. I guess he just... left.


Buh, looked like I missed some stuff when prereading. Sowwy. :twilightblush:
> looked incredulously at the satiation
I supposed that last word should be "stallion"?
> After turning both both handles to full
Double 'both'

Oh, also? Still an extra space between "Souls" and "editors" in the end piece. Fix that! And in the previous chapter too! :twilightangry2:

1139342 Thanks :pinkiehappy:

1196157 Well depending on what you think he meant, possibly...:duck:

1198754 Hey, no spoilers or you won't get to see chapter 5 (if i ever finish it). :flutterrage:

In my head the Goldberrys were a super rich family (they could a ford to have their own private mini-Stable built) who only ever ate the rarest of flowers that were specially grown just for them, eating anything the common pony folk ate was beneath them (think Blueblood's snobbishness x10). :facehoof:

There was a line in Sights 2 that the Doc planed to escaped just after telling the family, while they were distracted going after Cookie, but I had to cut it for room. The pony skeleton near the shelter entrance that Zest and Clutch come across was the Doc's (the radiation level was still to high to live in).:fluttercry:

Mistakes fixed. :derpytongue2:

1201193

Hey, no spoilers or you won't get to see chapter 5 (if i ever finish it). :flutterrage:

Nope, no spoilers. Just some harmless teasing :rainbowwild:

In my head the Goldberrys were a super rich family (they could a ford to have their own private mini-Stable built) who only ever ate the rarest of flowers that were specially grown just for them, eating anything the common pony folk ate was beneath them (think Blueblood's snobbishness x10). :facehoof:

Hehe. Makes perfect sense :rainbowlaugh:

Mistakes fixed. :derpytongue2:

:yay:

Sorry for the wait in commenting. Busy with college stuffs. Or things. Not sure which :twilightsmile:

1201193
You like being a giant Mutationtease, don't you?

Ok, so some ponies in the stable were killed by tomatoes. The question is, WHAT THE TRIXIE KILLED EVERYONE ELSE!? It's really unlikely, even from Stable-Tec, that all the ponies in a stable would have been related to each other, and would have the same problem. Since the Goldberrys would have been dead from tomato, were these the servants who lived? Also, they were all killed in the same place, after they dragged a pony to be killed in front of everyone either just be stabbing, or ritualistically. So, was that the guy who installed the soup talisman, or was this a regular basis kind of thing?

Cutie Mark!!! Spider with a web. Networking? Obviously a great deal of skill with magitech and circuitry, so she was someone who would have been insanely useful inside of an Earth Pony only stable, which focused more on technology. There is, of course, the obvious (World wide web, lol).

1251418 "You like being a giant Mutationtease, don't you?"
No, not at all... *looks at Souls 3* Ok, yeah :scootangel:

"WHAT THE TRIXIE KILLED EVERYONE ELSE!? "
It's not a stable, it's a privately owned shelter built by Cookie for the Goldberry family. Only ponies in there were members of the Goldberry family (about a dozen ponies), Cookie, and Doc. All the sick and dying family members dragged Cookie there to kill him at the machine that killed them all. Then they were either too weak to leave the room or had a strong sense of dramatic imagery. :pinkiesick:

Yay for cutie mark speculation! :yay:

1251713
I would have expected the Goldberrys to be smart enough to have some friends around to prevent complete inbreeding. I feel silly.

Member...

cdn.memegenerator.net/instances/400x/20523091.jpg

Also seriously? How could Second not know about that tradition?

Right. Analysis. A variation on the Animal Friend perk that works on insects? Second was obviously an idiot for not just leaving it alone when it wasn't attacking. I'm almost surprised he isn't a Stable Dweller himself. It also appears that, while snug, the jumpsuit is not snug enough to make whatever mutation she has readily visible without prolonged inspection. It's pretty obvious between this one and last one that while she hasn't retained memories, she has retained emotions about certain subjects. I seriously hope that what was implied in the previous chapter, and what we all suspect, is not true.

Also, I never did thank you for clearing up that bit of confusion regarding the Pip-buck and journals.

Has Second's mark been revealed? I don't remember...

1269714"Member..."
Hey, I had that joke stuck in my head for the past 5 months,so I feel bad enough as it is. :pinkiecrazy:

"How could Second not know about that tradition?"
What tradition?

"A variation on the Animal Friend perk that works on insects?"
Or it could be an unusually friendly ant. Although Zest is no Queen Daisy... :pinkiehappy:

"she has retained emotions about certain subjects."
I'm following along the side effects of memory modification that were established in Project Horizons, although a little different due to story related complications. :pinkiegasp:

"I seriously hope that what was implied in the previous chapter, and what we all suspect, is not true."
What is implied may not be what you suspect, but then it might be exactly what you suspect, it all depends n what you suspect I suspect. :pinkiesmile:

"Has Second's mark been revealed? I don't remember..."
Nope, It dosen't come up until Souls 1-5 (it's been covered by his trader outfit so far). It's not really much of a story issue though...

1275435
"What tradition?"
Of separating the new guy from ALL TEH CAPS

"Zest"
I thought we were keeping the names separate between fics...

"convoluted"
But I didn't. I only knew that you'd know that I knew. Don't you think? [/moviereference]

“What in the wild wasteland did you do that for!?”
Hahaa... sneaky reference to the infamous trait.

(and yay Knife Ant reference!)


Woah, looks like I missed a few errors when prereading this. Time for Round Two, I guess.
(I better go reread part 4 before you publish it, to see if missed more there)
> in front of the white manned pony
"Maned".
> Flower backed out of necklace
Seems like a word is missing between "of" and "necklace"
> the limitations of memory orb
orbs

Oh, and in the editors part...
> whose constant encouragement is what got this insanitary off the ground to begin with
...insanitary? I do hope you mean "insanity" :rainbowhuh:

1275984 "Of separating the new guy from ALL TEH CAPS"
Well given Clutch's real background, it's not all that surprising... :twilightsmile:

"I thought we were keeping the names separate between fics..."
With all the names and aliases I have in this story (most not even published yet), I tend to stick with the character's "real" name to avoid confusing myself :applejackconfused:
1280978
"...insanitary? I do hope you mean "insanity" "
Well it's a dirty job but some one has to do it... :facehoof:
Thanks for the corrections, all fixed. :twilightsheepish:

1282779

Well it's a dirty job but some one has to do it... :facehoof:

Actually, that was about the part No One did :rainbowlaugh:

1284202
If no one did it, why assign blame?

1289442 Irrelevant. The blame was on the one who wrote the accreditation, and that's still Moth :rainbowwild:
(The blame WOULD be on me as prereader, if not for the fact he never included that part in the drafts)

I love how this chapter led right into Sounds. This was a pretty good chapter, I found it fun. So you must be doing something right! Good job so far, can't wait to read more! Keep up the fantastic work!

The mutation? Good job. Not many people would have pulled that off.

The Mine? Should have realized. I'm with stupid. I keep forgetting that you can modify things in real life because of the game, and whenever an artist pull something like this out I don't see it.

The Haunting? I had absolutely no clue. That came out of nowhere.

Orange Zebra? I think I should stop talking and let a man who's very accurate with Chekhov's Gun sight his target.

haahahah hes haunting the gun good chapter looking towards the next

1328012 "Good job so far, can't wait to read more!"
Thanks! :pinkiehappy:

1334131 "Good job. Not many people would have pulled that off."
Thank you. I knew once I surprised all 4 of my editors with the reveal i knew that it would work. :twilightsmile:

"That came out of nowhere."
Yay! double reveals for the win!:yay:

"Orange Zebra?"
He's certainly a colorful character :rainbowlaugh:

1334884 "good chapter looking towards the next "
Thanks! With the "Mutation Mystery" arc over, next will be the "Colt Conundrum" (with 30% more pronouns)!:twistnerd:

1341466
Are we also acquiring awesome alliteration?

Hey, Moth. Just wanted to say that you're one of my favorite fan-fiction writers out there. Something about your style is so captivating, the language is simple, yet the flow is constant, the characters - relateable, the structure - solid, the humor - strong, and your stories are overall very fun to read.

What I really like about your stories is that you take a simple concept that has been used times and times before, and you re-create it in a brand new light (e.g., "Wings" - a diary concept taken to the next level).

You are a very talented writer, and I hope you go far.

Sincerely, a failed editor of yours.

~Freeloader

:facehoof:
A slave, Desert Rock Flower Blossom? Man, some stable ponies just can't be left alone without them doing something foolish.

I'm rather uncomfortable with the Slavery, though there is a difference between Slavery (Using someone as labor without pay, against their will) and Indentured Servitude (Using someone as labor as a mutually agreed upon amount by both parties to pay off a debt, usually a large one). All things considered, this is essentially a very, very long term Temp. Agency.

"Cobra"
YO JOE!

“Well, what’s left of my name after a heavily armed scribe took a rocket launcher to the sign.”
Applejack or Regular? Or this one's version of 'Riley's Rangers'?

"The young light blue unicorn mare, with a silvery mane and cold blue eyes"
How closely is Colt related to Trixie? Trick Question: Trixie's been Reincarnated for a second chance.

"E.D.A."

WHERE ARE THE FILLINGS!?

1342891
Completely coincidental coupling of common consonants.:pinkiehappy:

1358067
Thank you. I have very little skill with writing (or art, or acting) but I think that I at least come up with original ideas (or at least ones too insane for others to try). :twistnerd:

1403967
Well at least it's not another DIY WMD:rainbowlaugh:
Although, given Colt's back story...:rainbowderp:

1404144
The slavery topic was one of the things I was rather worried about including, Colourful will be going into more detail about it next chapter. Like all things in this story, the morality of it is seen differently by each protagonist.

They are about 100 years to early for Applejack's rangers, so regular kind (sort of...) :ajbemused:

Trixie's hair has a blue streak, while Colt's hair is... different.:trollestia:

YES! So glad that some one got that reference! it's one of my favourite python sketches.:heart:

1404728

You will just have to be somewhat careful about how you deal with slavery. It can work as shown by Sir Leadhead's story "FOE:Morality of Property" . But still, it is a touchy subject.

Now onward to more chapters and development!

1404728
But it's sunny, and they're in Equestria itself... that implies that the cloud curtain has come down (as well as the fact that people know who the Enclave are)

"Trixie's hair has a blue streak, while Colt's hair is... different.:trollestia:"

Good god, how many extended family members did Celestia HAVE!?

1406583
When was it said it was sunny? The sun was stronger in the desert as mentioned in part 1 "Even with the cloud cover, which was thinner here than most of Equestria, the hot afternoon sun was beating down on them.", but the clouds were still there.:facehoof:

When has the Enclave ever been mentioned?:rainbowhuh:

Also, many times in the story it's been mentioned that the war happened 100 years ago. :twilightsheepish:

wait Colorful is a slaver so is he like the other slavers that are brutal, evil and beat their slaves and does he sell them to people are like that? Anyways good chapter again :trollestia:

1406835
I forgot that everyone knew that it was the Pegasi that closed the clouds. I was wrong.

No One's Home...


I see what you did there.

1404144

How closely is Colt related to Trixie? Trick Question: Trixie's been Reincarnated for a second chance.

Um, seeing as this is roughly 100 before Littlepip, Trixie is still very much alive at this point. Did you miss that in FO:E? :trixieshiftright:

What are the odds of all them getting the wild wasteland trait?

Another good chapter.

"After being fired for not adequately servicing the ponies of Dise"
Fixed that for you.

Lio Coh Jwei Ji Neong Hur Ho Deh Yung Duh Buhn Jah J'wohn
TOO. MUCH. WHEDON.

Rajah Ghoul.
So long as he doesn't have a daughter that comes by with a relatively poor plot idea.

That all went south after the noodle incident…
I miss him too.

"'Piezo?' Hoof puzzled over the strange nickname. Don’t ask me, I don’t get it either."
I DO

Speculations? I got nothing.

Was... was that family a Night Court reference? Not only that, but in reference to my favorite characters in the entire series? :rainbowlaugh:

1420910
I certainly hope you did. :pinkiehappy:

1466100
Considering all they went through so far, somepony in the group mus already have it :)

1466958
"TOO. MUCH. WHEDON"
You can never have too much (unless you're the FOX channel) :trixieshiftleft:
"I DO"
Oh? :duck:

1467012
Now would I make an obscure reference about a couple of Yugoslavian recidivist knuckleheads? :twilightblush:

I'm so glad I caught that Half Life: Full Life Consequences reference. It made the whole chapter amazing when I read that. Very good job not making it too surreal with the ghost guy.

Wheee it's posted :pinkiehappy:

This chapter was a real trail to get done on time, and it was really down to the wire. Nyerguds and Hidden_Treasure went out of their way to edit this chapter, which was dropped on them at the last minute this morning! I hope this won't happen again...

Could be worse. One day Midnightshadow sent me a mail to inform me the new chapter of King of Diamonds was ready for prereading, which I saw about half an hour after it was sent. I barely replied that I'd take a look before getting a second mail (eight minutes later) saying he posted it anyway. :facehoof:

btw, Hidden_Treasure's fimfic user link seems to derp. There's an -s too much :rainbowderp:

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