• Member Since 9th Oct, 2012
  • offline last seen Last Thursday

Gamer Script


Writer, singer, dancer, voice actor, gamer, streamer, and wide open for commissions.

Comments ( 10 )

Ok, not bad, this was a fun little read. However you might wanna work on the description as i didnt see any instance of oral or hardcore at any point but correct me if im wrong.
Also it was a bit difficult and even confusing to keep track of the positions the way they were written. And it would've been nice to read the extra 3 rounds these two made after the first instead of just stating that it happened as i really enjoyed going through this and would've liked to see more.

8913351
You're correct as in writing this I forgot those two aspects. And I do plan to come back to this and add more but I've had a good bit of life hitting me for the last few months, so I've had no time.

8923691
Understandable, when you decide to make some adjustments feel free to send me a message as i would like to go through this again.

Bravo, im impressed. Although i have to say it was such a long time since i read the old version that its hard to make a comparrison but this is definitely much better and more satisfying than the last one, plus the ending was really sweet :twilightsmile:
Overall i would say this was a good retelling of the story, good job.

9142373
Thank you. I know it's been a long time but I'm glad it was worth it regardless.

Damn that was HOT, any chance of a sequel to this story, maybe where Sunset finds out she got pregnant from Comet during that night of fun for them?

9255462
Hmm... I never say no to a possible continuation but that story would be an extreme shift in genre. I will think on it though.

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