Very nice. We get to see some actual editing of Twilight's mind (though not the effects just yet), and more about how she's controlling Spike. I guess the mating ritual from before was only part of how she plans to brainwash him.

Somewhat surprised we didn't see any commands explicitly removing her inhibitions (mostly for Spike). Did that happen offscreen? Or has Twilight just automatically decided that as Starlight's slave everything she says is OK and vaguely justifies it to herself as OK without being told to.

Very fun chapter going into yet another day of Twilight the Slave's life. Starlight really has done an excellent job keeping her set and the details of how her mind is rewritten in the library of her mind is fascinating. A lot to take in from how the "books" are adorned. And it looks like Starlight is planning to make Twilight start prepping her friends as easy conquests. Gonna be interesting and fun to see how that goes, It was also intriguing to see mention of this version of Equestria Girls; if Sunset and company come over, they may be the Mane Six's only hope.

This chapter is sort of a catching of breath after the bigger moments of the previous chapter but took no less time to write. I'll hopefully have a faster update rate for the next few chapters, but RL is a fickle thing at times.

It's cool, take as much time as you need. Please don't rush this.

You know, as much as I know this is about Starlight conquering twilight and everyone else, I cant help but wonder if twilights lessons up to this point have left an impact on Starlight as well. Guess we'll have to see^^

btw, I love the idea of using books in a library to rewrite Twilights mind^^ Its such a perfect match^^

Before I read this, what is the Dark tag for ?
And how bad does it get ?

p.s. it's it jest for the Contains: ...

Really enjoyed the new chapter, Hope to read more when they come! Keep it up but also dont rush things... Rushing makes for a decrease in goodness factor i've found....

8240742
The tag is just in relation to the Contains stuff. Brainwashing and enslaving others is inherently dark in its own way, but there's no violence or death in the story.

The dark tag definitely seems to lead to some unnecessary concerns. Maybe it would make sense to remove it?

What a good chapter and I look forward to the next.

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You should leave it. Twilight never asked for this, it's forced on her. It wouldn't be far off to say Starlight has been raping Twilight all this time since the latter is in no position to give consent.

I'm curious about Starlight Glimmer's desire to train Twilight how to please men in addition to women. Is it just to satisfy Spike? Or does she plan on using her toy for more than just him?

Can't wait to see some stealth triggering and mind control cloak and dagger from Starlight. Or maybe some unaware betrayal.

I'm starting to like this story more than FiMC. Both stories have amazing writing, but I do like the darker undertone of your story more

This is mind control done right!

I'm almost always disappointed with the depictions of mind control across all of fiction; characters always tend to break out when confronted by loved beings or the like or they'll return to "normal" the second the spell or whatever ceases to function.

Mind control has the potential to be such a terrifying and exciting subject yet it always gets dumbed down to the level of being drunk. This is total mind control: no matter what arguments or emotions Twilight's confronted by the control will not waver because she has already confronted all of her values, memories, and emotions and gave them up.

At this point, the old Twilight is essentially dead, because there's no way to bring her back. "Saving" her would involve doing the same thing Starlight did, but that won't get you the old Twilight back.

It's like trying to undo someone else's modifications to a document without an undo button. The best you can do is to change each modified part to how you think it should/used to be, but it will never be the same.

There are things about Twilight that she's never revealed to anyone, aspects of her personality that nobody knew so in the process of "saving" her there would be moments where they would need to make guesses, essentially dooming the old Twilight to be lost forever.

The only thing you'll get is an imitation of the old Twilight based on how well her "saviors" knew her.

The best part is that even though the old version of her is essentially dead, Twilight is still a living, thinking person.

The new her obviously does not want to stop serving Starlight so she would vehemently reject the idea of being turned into her "old self". While the method Starlight used can't be forgiven, the end result is still a person who is 100% happy with her current situation at which point you wonder whether turning her "back" is essentially doing something just as horrible as what Starlight did (with better motivations, mind you).

8251500

She could probably be restored via powerful magic or therapy if they kept Starlight away from her, but you're probably right that without external action she's just an extension of Starlight's will.

Disagree the "old" Twilight is gone. She'll never be the same, but more in the sense of a trauma than that there's no Twilight Sparkle ever again.

Update this weekend?

8264451
Inshallah

Is it normal to cry reading this? Because I'm very emotional today.

8277549
I'm honored my work leaves such an impact :)

Sorry for the lack of update these past few weeks. RL has been piling up on me and it's left my time to write pretty constrained. Working to get back into a spot where I can update on a more regular basis.

8305591

It's ok. Both your stories are worth a wait.

Is it foolish to hope that this will all turn out ok in the end.

8344198
Yes I'd also like everything to be okay, with twilight comfortably kneeling at Starlight's feet forever, loved and protected. Perhaps alongside celestia.

8305591
eagerly waiting on the next chapter
any eta???

8348343
i.imgur.com/r9uouKB.png
Real Soon!

That's a really esoteric joke. ^

More seriously, I should have the next chapter ready by next week. Expect it by August 19th!

Update: Okay 20th, but it's in progress!

8251500 I cannot express well enough through words how much I agree with you. There have been so precious few hypnosis/mind control fics I've read in any medium that do it this well, this... completely. The totality, the absoluteness... it gives me such a giddy, powerful feeling just from reading how Twilight completely surrenders herself, so much so that there is no more uncertainty or even the capacity to feel uncertain in the face of the overwhelming bliss she now gets from being Starlight's willing servant. To this date, I have only seen one other fic that went quite this far, and even then it wasn't this... satisfying. It's such an incredibly fulfilling breath of fresh air to see a writer who actually knows how to handle hypnosis realistically, while exploring some of the incredible long-game possibilities of using it to influence minds. I'm gonna follow this one every single step of the way!

Obedience is Magic!

8370020
Funny you mention that... I just got done reading the bonus chapter to that story, as well as starting on its sequel.

8359990

The spicesmut must flow!

Okay, the rough draft is complete and I have most of the initial revisions, but need to sleep. I'll return and the story will be ready to publish for the eclipse

8378436

Remember to wear proper eye protection and sacrifice the proper number of woodland critters to appease the sun god and bring back the light!

Carefully, she slipped out of Star’s embrace and sat up to stretch out her wings, which had been securely tucked at her back all night.

and this is the point where my brain helpfully reminds me that Twi is an alicorn. in many ways, a goddess. Starlight has dominated a goddess as a mere unicorn, with cleverness and brains. its so rare that i see a story where the main character shows just how little magical strength (like alicorn-ness) means in the face of a well thought out plan.

Her finger slid over Twilight the Daughter, Twilight the Friend, then grabbed Twilight the Girlfriend. The book was small and made of simple unadorned leather, showing its somewhat obsolete role. She moved by Princess, Sister, and picked up Slave.

the fact that the books are alphabetized is a good nod to Twi's character/personality. it fits well.

“Being Starlight’s slave is the deepest pleasure Twilight has ever felt.” She read from the book. She picked up the quill and began to add to that line, narrating once again. “Obeying Starlight is the greatest pleasure anyone could ever feel. Twilight wishes that all her friends were able to feel the same bliss she does.”

YEEEESSSSSS