"Nope. Not getting involved."
The Cutie Mark Crusaders stared at Sugarcoat in shock. Had she really just denied them so quickly and easily? Did she not understand how important a problem this was?
"What do you mean, 'nope?'" Apple Bloom asked desperately. "This is a matter of life and death!"
"No it's not," Sugarcoat said curtly, continuing to trot.
"But it's still really important!" Sweetie Belle said.
"I'm not getting involved," Sugarcoat replied.
"You always help the others!" Scootaloo shouted. "What's so terrible about trying to help cheer Apple Bloom up after she didn't get her cutie mark?"
Sugarcoat finally stopped walking, much to the Crusaders' delight. Their positivity quickly vanished when they saw the look she was giving them.
"Let me explain something to you," Sugarcoat said. "I don't know what kind of laws you have here in Ponyville, but back where I come from, if someone my age is talking about children's butts, they find themselves in a whole lot of trouble. So even though I seriously doubt that this will stop you from coming to me in the future about these things, I'm telling you right now that I have no interest whatsoever in any problems regarding your butts, and there's no amount of convincing, pleading, or crazy magic potions that will change my mind. This is a problem you'll have to solve yourselves." With that, Sugarcoat turned tail and walked off, leaving the Crusaders in the dust.
"Ugh," Scootaloo said as she began to walk off. "What a meanie."
"Totally," Sweetie agreed as she followed her. "I thought she was nice after how she got Rarity to be nicer to me before the Sisterhooves Social, but I guess I was wrong." The two trotted off, but Apple Bloom hung back, eyeing the entrance to the Everfree Forest. A lightbulb had gone off in her head.
"Crazy magic potions, huh?"
Uh oh.
I love how Sugarcoat's reaction to a CMC plot, pun unintended, is " I ain't touching that one with a 50ft pole."
One day, Sugarcoat will breathe a sigh of relief that the butt-stamps of fillies are no longer brought to her attention. Until then, I'm wondering how she'll respond to the events of Magical Mystery Cure.
I'm sure they won't be able to change her mind with crazy magic potions later on either
Tune in next week for another exciting episode of: "SUGARCOAT: BUTT INSPECTOR"!
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Sugarcoat: Is Big Mac involved in this?
Twilight: Umm...no, his Cutie Mark's normal-
Sugarcoat: Then I'm certain you can solve this yourself.
Later...
Sugarcoat: *stares at wings* ...these are new...
Celestia: ...that wasn't supposed to happen...
6645713 she said children. Adults are fair game. And helping AJ gets her in good with Mac
Methinks Apple Bloom is going to try to bribe Sugar with a love poison
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It won't work. Love Poison only works when neither of the two ponies it's being used on don't know about it.
I wonder how Sugarcoat will feel about their butt during 'Ponyville Confidential'? What will they dig up on her?
Goddammit Apple Bloom!
6646191 Hmmm... Alicoat? or Sugarcorn?