Returning to Light's Lab, Mega Man saw Dr. Light approaching with yet another alert about one of the Wub Masters, but Mega Man held up his hand to stall him. "Dad..." he began. "Is it just me...or do the Wub Masters seem...even more eclectic than Wily's Robot Masters normally do?"
"Eclectic?" Tom asked, surprised.
"Normally, they all seem to follow some sort of theme, or serve some sort of purpose together," Mega Man explained. "Either that, or there's a common pattern of design. It all seems to follow some sort of a plan, even if it's odd. But Vinyl's..." Mega Man shook his head. "They mesh in ones or twos...but overall, there's no pattern, no matching theme. It's...it's like she tossed a whole bunch of ideas into a hat and then pulled eight out at random, not caring about the result..."
Dr. Light scratched his chin. "Well...I suppose you could be right..."
"How many more Wub Masters do you have a bead on?" Mega Man asked.
"We know there are three more active," Dr. Light replied. "But we've only got a lock on the activities of two. We can't track the third yet..."
"Of the two, which would you say is stranger?"
Surprised by the qualifier, Dr. Light analyzed the two available profiles. "...I'd say the one that's taken over the mall," Dr. Light replied.
"The mall?" Mega Man asked, shocked. "Okay, this bot I've got to see!" Turning, he raced out to the mall.
Reaching the mall, Mega Man was surprised to find that, in addition to the usual Mets and other 'assistance' bots that normally raced around various locations to help people, the place seemed to be infested with rabid take-out boxes that threw their contents at him before attempting to dive bomb him once they were empty. "Well, I'm pretty sure I know where to look for the Wub Master, then," Mega Man murmured after blasting several of them. He ran up to the nearest mall directory. "Now...where's the food court?" he murmured, looking it over.
Unfortunately, the robots had done quite a bit of damage to the mall, which the directory didn't account for. As a result, Mega Man found himself coming to several dead ends where he was confronted by everything from a rogue vending machine to a mad clothing rack. As he progressed, Mega Man became more and more convinced that this entire effort on Vinyl's part wasn't as well thought out as it had first appeared. It seemed less like a carefully crafted plan and more and more like trying to build off of an idea and a location once selected. Definitely more slapdash than Wily's usual approach.
Eventually, Mega Man found his way to the food court, only to find the place covered in food, oil spills, grease, and...other things he didn't want to think about. Standing in the middle of it was a humanoid robot wearing a stained chef's apron and hat, its entire body so covered in filth that nothing beyond that could be made out. "You're the...Wub Master?" Mega Man gagged, trying not to think about what he'd be fighting in.
"Aye, that be me," the robot replied, its accent thick but undecipherable. "VWM-007, Bad Chef. But ye can call me Stinky."
"...Bad Chef is right..." Mega Man mumbled. "This place is a mess! What are you thinking, trying to serve food here? It's a breeding ground for sickness!"
"Precisely!" Bad Chef proclaimed proudly. "Those who eat here will be winnowed through! The strong will survive while the weak sicken and die, as nature intended, and humanity will be stronger for it! Those weak gutted pansies like the 'Health Department' should go back to their clean little homes and lives, only to die when the sickness comes!" Scooping up a handful of food laying around, he licked it. "Ah, ye can taste the salmonella!"
"...you're sick!" Mega Man gagged.
"And yer dead!" Bad Chef proclaimed, rocketing forward on a blast of fire that seemed to emerge from his ass.
Mega Man dodged desperately, doing his best to manage his charge so he didn't use the Skull Blast. The last thing he wanted to do here was get knocked back into one of these piles of filth. He did notice that the grease and oils spills burst into flames when Bad Chef passed over them, and that he took damage from the flames. A plan began to form in Mega Man's mind, especially once he saw that the flaming charge was Bad Chef's only attack aside from throwing food.
As he evaded to the side of one charge, he turned away from Bad Chef. "This is going to suck..." he murmured, before opening fire with the Skull Blast. Slamming into Bad Chef, he caused him to re-angle into one of the filthier food stands, causing it to explode.
"Not bad!" Bad Chef barked out as he climbed out from the rubble. "Maybe yer tougher than ya look! But ya ain't beaten me yet!"
"Yes I have," Mega Man muttered. "I turned off the pilot lights but turned on all the gas burners in that kitchen before knocking you in." With that, Mega Man leapt behind a concrete planter.
Bad Chef turned towards the kitchen as he smoldered. "Oh f-"
As Mega Man climbed out of the wreckage that had covered him, he stared at the crater where Bad Chef had been destroyed. Glancing at his arm, he saw the readout regarding the Master Weapon he'd gotten. "'It Burns!'?" he murmured, only to burst into laughter. "I get it now!" he laughed out. Turning to a nearby camera, he flashed a thumbs up. "Enjoying the show, Vinyl?" he called out. "I know you're watching! And Wily, turn your safe search on! She's only 12!" Chuckling, he turned to go. "All this just to mess with my head...and every one designed to push me to my limits physically and mentally...but be incapable of killing me! Vinyl, there is a limit to messing with a friend's head!"
Albert blinked as he turned from the screen to his equine daughter. "Is it true?" he asked, shocked. "Did you really design them to be incapable of destroying him?"
"Of course!" Vinyl replied. "If one of them did, all the work on the others would go to waste!"
"And...where did you get the ideas for these?"
"4chan!" Vinyl proclaimed proudly. "They had the best ideas...even if some of them didn't make sense. I liked the potty humor ones better, but the polls said the sex ones were better." She frowned, scratching her chin. "That's how Da Bomb and Love Machine got selected...but what do those have to do with sex?" As Albert groaned, she asked one last question. "What is sex, anyway? Grown up humans sure seem to be obsessed with it..."
Protoman quickly held a pillow between Wily's head and the wall as he began to rhythmically bang against it.
> 4chan designs a Mega Man game
Seems accurate.
Wait... Bad Chef is named Stinky... Indescribable accent... Issues against the board of health... Great, now I gotta play Sam & Max again.
LOL I loved the update!
Also, a typo.
polls
... I-I can't even. Great job... but so much wut
That was fun, may I have another? Looking forward to more.
Keep up the good work. Deus tecum.
6820603 are u sure its a typo?
Somehow I bet you asked a 4chan thread to come up with this.
I was kind of hoping for one of them to be Mettaton.
vignette4.wikia.nocookie.net/vsbattles/images/2/20/Mettaton_ex_knock_%27em_dead.png/revision/latest/scale-to-width-down/350?cb=20151204140752
And the "Bad Cook" reminded me of the cooking robot from "Cubix". I wasn't able to find a picture...
6820755
No. It was just a good joke.
Bad Chef really had a fire in his belly. Especially the lower intestine.
Imagine him being in an advertisement with the catchphrase "Feel the burn! Work those buns!".
And suddenly everything snaps into place in my mind. You, sir, are sadistic.
6820814 Square Enix and Disney would likely take issue, "Got it memorized?"
Vinyl, sweetie, that's the last place for good ideas.
6820772 Darn, would have been even funnier if it were the case.
Why do I get the feeling that the one in the fortress will actually be a problem?
6820989 Seeing as how she got her ideas from 4chan.. I get the feeling the last Wub Master will be Anonymous.
So... does this mean the runs over or will he finish the run just to see what else Vinyl cooked up?
Another enjoyable chapter. Good work.
This is going to make the talk rather difficult...
and so megaman turns high and mighty again, I really hope bass gets to feed him his own face soon.
Vinyl...got the ideas for her Masters...from 4chan...
...
6820585 you know there is a story with Trixie? Look in older stories.
6820585
Yes, Bad Chef's personality was based off Grandpa Stinky from the Telltale Sam and Max games.
I can imagine a chibi Protoman holding a pillow over is head while Dr. Wily slams his face into it with cute little "pomfs" with each hit.
6820585 I was thinking Barf from "You can't say that on Television" good to know I was wrong
6820771 Seriously! MTT would be a great idea! Hitting on Megaman and being more fabulous than Da Bomb and Love Machine combined but cleaner!
6820771
Oh man, Cubix! Now that's a classic! I love that show!
so, she just got a bunch of these ideas, put them in a hat....
Should I Feel bad about my previous comment about vinyl or be even more glad I made it now that this chapter is out?
6821822 PTS.......is the wierder one....
As Albert groaned, she asked one last question. "What is sex, anyway? Grown up humans sure seem to be obsessed with it..."
Protoman quickly held a pillow between Wily's head and the wall as he began to rhythmically bang against it.
6822480 i was joking that earlier in the chapter...
Real One: Well, a cooking chapter without any Gordon Ramsay reference, not bad, I would love to see that, maybe in a different game I suppose.
So ya sayin' he was able ta defeat him? But he's not but a wee bairn!... Eh, but what do I ken, this was humorous nonetheless.
is that normal? not knowing at that age? cos where i grew up everyone knew of it at least the age of ten..im actually confused of which is normal.
*head banging commences*
Sounds more like megaman walked into the Earthbound universe.
6822945
There's knowing about the word sex and then there is knowing what sex is. Though I doubt what Vinyl would find hot would tip off most of the dumber humans, given that she's an equine. She could probably watch a few episodes of national geographic on the subject of Zebras without it tipping off anyone else to what she's REALLY looking for. Though given that she was raised in a world of Humans maybe she'd find cowboys hot.
6823036 i meant they know what it is. the entire process.
i0.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/000/239/448/1c8.jpg
Sums it up quite nicely, doesn’t it?
please make one of them metatton
6820772 well, you could do another VSW arc with actual polls
And that is Rock's revenge. I'm half convinced Vinyl knows the answer to her question and is just messing with her dad, but half scared she doesn't. If that's the case and true for Kalinka, I can see Wily and Cossack giving the girls 'The Talk' and then retiring for the evening to get roaring drunk in Vodka so the memory is wiped clean.
Well, of course 4chan made those ideas
Yeah a tad late for safe search now.
For some reason, Bad Chef makes me think of the Dead Rising 2 Psycho. Own Little World kept playing in my head when I read the Battle with Bad Chef.
7318731
Actually, bad chef reminds me of rancid chef man from jailhouse blues.
that last paragraph
Oh Dear.