Chapter 20: I'm still a Person, Right?
I was released from the hospital about four days ago. If I'm thinking right that means today is Monday; didn't think I had been in town for two weeks already.
Even though I was discharged from the hospital I still have to go there daily. After all Arrow still has to deal with those burns, and I'm his new assistant so I have to do a few things for him. Things like turning the channel, bringing him news, throwing a banana at the bitchy nurse. The usual things he'd do if he was able to move more freely.
Today though was his day to finally get out of there. When I saw him yesterday he said that we were going to have a serious conversation about what happened, and about this assistant thing. That wasn't what I thought was important though because I still had to make sure that I didn't destroy his life.
I shouldn't have gotten angry like that. I can't control myself if I get to emotional, and bad things happen. I shook my head of these thoughts as I made my way up the grassy hill to the ponyville hospital.
"Hey, Chance," Diamond said when she walked up behind me.
"Hey, Diamond. What's up?"
"I saw you so I figured We'd talk about your new cutie mark," I stopped in my tracks when she said that. I didn't pay much mind to the new ass tattoo, but it was these ponies destinies. That begs the question of why I have one if my destiny is to go home.
"I'd rather not talk about it,"
"Why not?" She asked as she picked up her pace to walk in front of me. She turned around to look me directly in the eyes before continuing,"It's a big deal,"
"Not to me. All this thing says to me-" I said as I patted the picture on my rump, "- is that I can roast marshmallows"
After saying that I moved around her so I could get to the hospital at the top of this hill. I knew she was still with me, but I didn't turn to face the filly. This mark doesn't make me any more of a pony than I already was, right? Yeah, yeah I'm still the same old Chance who likes cake and hates jackasses.
When I finally reached the top of the hill I saw Arrow standing by the entrance talking with a grey unicorn. Why was my therapist here; he isn't supposed to be around for another week? Arrow noticed me and directed Insight toward me as well before walking over.
"Good to see you, Chance," Arrow said with a grin plastered across his face. "I was just talking with Insight about you,"
"Really?"
"We were discussing your problem," Insight said as he walked up beside arrow. Of course they'd go back into my humanity when I didn't need help with it.
"I don't need help," I said in a spiteful tone. Insight held up a hoof before continuing,
"No, no we meant your magical problem and your fear of Ms. Heartstrings,"
"Who?"
"The unicorn from the day you woke up," Arrow interjected. I remember that unicorn; she seemed almost identical to Jungle Vine except her fur was a lighter tint of green. "I have a solution to both,"
"I really don't believe-" Insight tried to voice concern, but Arrow cut him off with.
"He's a quick learner, and if she teaches him he'll lose his fear,"
"I know how to use my magic. I don't need teaching," Of course they'd try to get me to be taught magic over that surge, but really that only happens when I'm extremely angry.
"Chance, you need to learn to control your magic. That is why I've requested a professional teacher," Insight said. In all honesty I hated both options because one I'm near someone that might be a sociopath, and the other is a professional. So my choices were crazy and hostile or boring and excessive amounts of work.
"Like I said, I know how to use my magic,"
"We can have this conversation another time. Arrow, please ask him when you get the chance," That was a strange request, but Arrow just nodded. I was about to ask what he was going to talk to me about when Diamond spoke up,
"My daddy can find you a teacher. I can ask him if you'd like,"
"I know how to control it. I just need to stay calm and it's fine,"
"I can-"
"It's fine!" I couldn't stand it when people kept pushing me for something. They just don't know when to stop harassing me about things I don't need.
Diamond looked a little hurt by my outburst, but she didn't say anything and instead trudge back down the path. I looked at Arrow who had a disapproving gaze across his face.
"Don't say it," I said to him before walking back down the path with him beside me. We were about half way down when he began speaking,
"Things have been pretty rough for you, haven't they?"
"What gave it away? My lack of judgement, my fear of that mare, the fact that I keep hurting people?"
"You know, we can help you," What did he mean by help me? What could he possibly do to help me out of this situation? "Insight knows a spell that-"
"NO!" I yelled at Arrow before he began. I didn't want to lose myself; I can't lose the only part of me that's still me. I still have my mind, but everything else is gone! My brother GONE, my body GONE, my life GONE. The only thing that keeps me from breaking down in tears is the fact that I might have a way back and that is fucking sketchy at best.
I felt Arrow start to hug me, and he wiped away the tears that I didn't even notice had formed in my eyes.
"I don't want to lose myself Arrow. I don't want to," I started hugging one of Arrow's legs. They were still covered in bandages, but I had to hold something to keep myself from curling up.
"You won't lose yourself, Chance. I promise," I felt him pat my head before letting me go. "Now, we are going to have to talk about what happened in that cave,"
I wiped the few tears left on my face away before giving Arrow my full attention.
"First is the fact you attacked Celestia. She is one of the princesses, Chance. If it wasn't for the fact you are a kid, and she knew about your mental health she could of given you a much harsher punishment,"
"I understand," I said looking down to the ground,
"If any one else was in there you can bet it would of been worse. She wants me to keep tabs on your treatment Chance,"
"Why?" I asked looking up at Arrow with a perplexed expression.
"She wants you to get better Chance, but if you keep fighting your treatment she'll force that spell on you,"
"She wouldn't dare," I could feel anger starting to rise in my tiny being over this. She can't do that, and even if she tried I'd just jump of a damn cliff first. If I forget who I am it was going to be my choice!
"She would, Chance. Now you have to understand she wants you to get better Chance, but you aren't leaving us much of a choice."
"I thought you understood that I can't forget myself Arrow!"
"If it wasn't for me you would of woken up without any of your memories!"
"What..."
"They wanted to go ahead and erase your memories. I told them not to because I believed you could get better on your own," They were going to make me forget? I really screwed up didn't I?
I looked back down to the ground in shame. I wanted to be angry; I wanted to do something to spite them but that really wouldn't help my situation would it?
"Just try to get better, for me," Arrow asked in a low voice.
"If I try, will you stay with me? I mean afterwards,"
"I'm supposed to protect you, Chance. I wont leave until I have to,"
"Thanks Arrow. Can we go home now?"
"Only if you get me another Super Duper Splatter milkshake,"
"I am not buying another one of those! It took up half the money I won from you!"
"I'll fly us there," Once he said that I jumped up onto his back and yelled,
"Onward Buttstallion!"
Over a hundred likes and still less than ten dislikes, good job you're doing way better than me.
6401375 I never expected any of my stories to hit fifty likes let alone a hundred. This is an achievement, but that doesn't mean I can just let this go to pieces. Now if you need me I'll be reading one of your stories so I can give it an upvote.
Edit: You wrote that story! I didn't notice you were the author. *begins bowing* all hail Eon! all hail Eon!
6401391 My stories not doing bad, it's actually doing way better than I expected just like for you and your story. Yours is just doing better than mine currently is for example I had around 25 dislikes when I hit 100 which was already more likes than I expected to get. You're certainly right you can't let this story go to pieces, you're doing a good job with that so far. If you do let this story go to pieces then I'll ................................... be really sad
but you're doing a good job.
6401400 I may have a rushed pace, be bad at the big moments, and forget to add details but that doesn't mean I'll give up on a story. Thanks for commenting and before I leave,
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6401406 You're welcome, and I'm sure you'll get better and better as time goes on. Thanks again.
6401441 I don't know what you're talking about.
It's always nice to see Chance have a bonding moment with Arrow.
6401576 Is there supposed to be something here? If there is I can't see it.
Edit: The comment has finally revealed itself!
I think Celestia needs to apologize to Chance. I mean she was going to kill Fire Catcher, Chance's friend meaning that she would've murdered an innocent if Chance stood by and did nothing, and that was his friend there's no way Chance was going to lie down about that. It was wrong to hurt the Princess but it was also wrong what she did so they are both at fault in some way, but it seems like Celestia is getting off scott free (which she probably could if she wanted to but Celestia's not like that), sure she rewarded Fire Catcher with new gemstones but that hardly seems like a suitable repayment for nearly killing him to me. Maybe she wasn't going to kill him but it sure seemed like she was and maybe she apologized to him and you just didn't write about it. I feel like a scene where the Chance and Celestia really discuss what happened in the cave and they both sincerely apologize for what they did would benefit the story. It would help both parties come to terms with what happened and understand fully the consequences of their actions and that they need to make up for them. Celestia and Chance apologize Celestia leaves end scene. I think something like that would be good, and maybe you're actually planning to do something like that already.
Anyway sorry this comment is long but I hope it helps in some way, have a good day.
6401750 Clearly you're new here. If you go back through the comments you'll see I love long comments (even the bad ones). As for your idea of that scene it's good, but I can't find a situation where they'll see each other without cramming her in randomly.
Actually scratch that I just thought of something.
6401768 You're welcome, and thanks.
6401808
6401750 It depends on what you think she should apologizes for and to how. Being the sovereign, she can't just say she is sorry on just anything, even in private, because it would fragilises her political authority and positions as well as her public image and all her institutions and make her a target of her political opposition. Now if you think about no one was truly in the right, all parties had made mistakes and had handed the situation poorly over a massive misunderstandings. In this situation Celestia only had to rely apologizes to Fire Starter, for nearly killing him over a misunderstanding and gave him restitution for the mistake, but he is also at fault in this two. In the eyes of the law, Fire Starter shouldn't have let Chance in his cave and should gone to tel the guardsponies that a lost colt was in his cave and should not have open fire, literally, which count as excessive use of defense on a pony that was no clear threat to him or Chance. In this situation, there is no apologize need to Chance as he is the cause of all of this.
6402365 I was struck with a desire to write!
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6401941 An apology may not be "needed" per se but I feel like Celestia and Chance should have some kind of one on one talk with each other about what happened, I think she would be willing to apologize for attacking one of his friends once she fully understands what happened, and likewise Chance would apologize for causing the trouble in the first place, there'd obviously be more to it than just an apology though for example Celestia at one point thought Chance had Stockholm syndrome so she might have a few questions about that. I'm not suggesting they meet just for the sake of apologizing but more to understand and discuss what happened.
6402827 I agree, a destitution on the issues of that events would be beneficial for closure on Chances' part, but I think that at this point for the story, would it would be best to move on and come at this later when tension are less high.
6402854 Yeah I wasn't trying to say it needs to happen immediately, I just wanted to suggest the idea before the author actually goes too far into the story and he couldn't possibly fit in. One of the Crowd said he had an idea to fit it in somewhere so we'll see where he goes with it.
6402890 One of my better skills is finding ways to make something work. Trust me when I say school has taught me more than just how to bullshit well.
6403034 Okay I trust you
6403040 That just might be the worst mistake of your life.
6403057 Probably not I'm always prepared
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Not much to say this chapter, because everyone else said everything already, other than this made my crappy day a little better
thanks
...Wasn't that last line a name Handsome Jack had for his diamond horse he bought?
6404014 maybe.
6403530 It's good to hear something I made helped you.
6404125 How many people did you expect to pick up on that?
6404140 The name is kind of iconic. I expected at least a few to.
So Celestias being kind of a bully - erasing memories? Desth penalty? Whut. - and Diamond Tiara is being considerate.
Yyyyeeeeeaaaahhhhh, quite a bit ooc.
6409064 This version does. And I understand she's out of character but I can't have Chance get off scott free. Celestia also can't be extremely forgiving toward him because of the fact she is a ruler that he attacked. She can't appear weak to others of political power.
Skipping the story for a moment to come and post on the title.
It may not make him feel any better but my definition of person is not the same as most people's or as one might find in a dictionary. Mine goes more along the lines of "If you are sentient enough to have your own personality (and yes I meant sentient not sapient), you are a person." Example; I would not consider a worm to be a person but I would consider a cat to be a person. And since ponies are definitely not a sack of flesh that are without even the most rudimentary of thought they qualify as a person. And yes, if you could find a way to make an AI, a robot, whatever sentient enough to follow that definition then I would say they qualify as a person too and all privledges that go with it.
High ho butt stallion the diamond pony
Many of the characters are coming across as artificially ignorant to cause drama and further the story. Celestia in particular. I find her to be poorly written and nothing more than a deus ex machina. Semi-immortal ruler over a country with one thousand years of peace or more jumps straight to conclusions and can't be reasoned with? Maybe if it was Luna. Maybe. Instead she's willing to murder in cold blood against all evidence to the contrary, and then points out that she could have the person who stopped her executed. Nope.
What's more, anyone even slightly familiar with stockholm syndrome knows it wouldn't set in that bloody fast.
Even besides that, the peacekeeping force is even more incompetent than demonstrated in the show. Can't capture a single unicorn.
But the clincher? Is that they're saying his delusions are coming from illegal magic to erase his memories and they want to treat it against his will with... illegal magic to erase his memories. For goodness' sakes, pretend Chance is not the center of the bloody universe and write accordingly.
im guilty of this myself occasionally, and its unusual for me to b a grammar nazi but and doesn't need a comma before it.
Brain rape? This is how you think Equestrians would treat a traumatized child? BY ERASING HIS MIND?
I've given you ONE thumbs down, I want to give you TWO.
I think you should rewrite this and previous chapters. Why the hell is Celestia like that? Too much OOC. And abusing child's memory? Well, if OOC can be used to Equestria, then it is! No, really, you should revwrite the chapters.
(snort) Buttstalion