New Bosses
Celestia sized up the two newest arrivals. Cassidy was a woman of average height, dressed in a customized black Team Rocket uniform that doubled as a mindress, with long white gloves covering her arms and very long high-heeled boots that reached to the top of her thighs. Her long blond hair split into two lengthy tails, and she wore long pink, triangular earrings. Her partner… whatshisname had short green hair notable only for its prominent bangs. He wore more conservative and practical attire, a long-sleeved black Team Rocket uniform with regular white boots and gloves.
The duo walked down their vehicle’s stairway as all but the trio offered them salutes. Cassidy had her hand on her hip and looked imperious, while the other guy just looked sullen and slouched a little. Upon setting foot on the ground, Cassidy immediately started towards Jessie, James, and Meowth.
“Well well well,” she said with a smirk on her face. “What have we here? Team Rocket’s biggest failures again?”
The trio glared daggers at her, but kept silent.
“The boss told us that we were going to take over from a gaggle of incompetent nitwits, but he never mentioned it would be you three. Of course, it’s not like we didn’t figure it out immediately. I mean, who else could possibly bungle such a simple operation?!” Cassidy put a hand to her mouth and laughed.
“Honestly,” her partner waved his hand dismissively. “How you three are still in the team is a mystery even Uxie couldn’t solve!”
The two burst out laughing. Jessie, James, and Meowth stood there with fists clenched and teeth gritted, visibly trying not to break their attention.
“Ha ha ha ha ha!” Cassidy chuckled, wiping a tear from her cheek. “Good one Bill!”
“Bill?” the green-haired man’s eye twitched.
“Grrr…” Jessie growled. “Listen Cassidy, why don’t you and Chuck there take a hike already?! Kalos is our turf, Giovanni said so himself!”
“Not anymore, sweetie,” Cassidy said. “The boss sent us to manage the operations in Kalos from here on out. That puts you under our direct command!”
“Yeah, so you’d better get one thing straight!” the man got in their faces. “My name is Butch, you got that? Not Bill, not Bob, not Buffy, not Chuck, not Boris! BUTCH! I’m your boss now, so you’d better not forget it!”
“Oh, quit your whining, Barney!” Cassidy scoffed. “One mustn’t lose one’s temper before one’s inferiors.”
“Bar…ney…”
Celestia could swear that she could make out the faintest traces of steam coming out of the man’s ears.
“MY NAME IS BUTCH!” he screamed, grabbing Cassidy by the shoulders and shaking her like a ragdoll. “BUTCH! NOT BARNEY! WE’VE WORKED TOGETHER FOR YEARS! HOW CAN YOU NOT KNOW THAT?!”
“You know,” Celestia commented to Meowth. “I find that I don’t much care for this Cassidy, or this Bruce. I assume you have history?”
At the sound of her voice, Butch took a break from putting his partner through a localized earthquake. His head turned towards the trio, and he looked past them to where the princess stood. His expression drooped into one of weary sullenness.
“You know,” he said with a sigh. “I can’t understand a word that Pokemon is saying, but somehow I just know that it’s mangling my name.”
Cassidy, meanwhile, shook her head frantically to clear the swirls from her eyes, and then shoved Butch’s hands off of her. She too turned to look at the three, and then advanced towards them.
“Stand aside, peons!” she waved her hand at the trio.
Grudgingly, all three of them parted to let their new superior through.
“What have we here?” Cassidy walked directly up to Celestia.
Two pairs of eyes locked as both sized up the other. The two females stood at almost even height, with the alicorn just edging out the human, not counting her horn. Butch very quickly moved to join his partner, also giving the princess a quick once-over.
“This is your Pokemon, I assume?” Butch asked.
James nodded, tightly.
Butch and Cassidy eyed Celestia one more time, looked at one another… and burst out laughing.
“Ahahahahahahahaha!” Butch roared. “It looks like something out of a little girl’s coloring book!”
“I think I saw it once before – when I was four!” Cassidy laughed along. “Sweet Arceus above, it’s got a rainbow mane and a cute little nose and everything!”
“Its hair even sparkles!” Butch chortled. “Is this a Pokemon or a three-year-old’s crayon drawing?!”
“What type is it?” Cassidy clasped her hands together. “A pretty rainbow unicorn princess Pokemon? With sparkles and glitter and magic pixie dust? Will it play tea party and dress-up with us?”
“You’re wrong!” James finally broke his silence, fist clenched. “That’s Celestia, and she’s one of the strongest Pokemon you’ll ever see! You don’t want to make her angry!”
Butch and Cassidy looked over at him, blinked, and then resumed their laughter louder than ever.
“Oh no!” Cassidy mock-swooned. “The little girl’s toy will get mad at us! Oh Brutus, whatever shall we do?”
“It’s Butch!” he snapped.
“Should we tremble at the painted toes of her dainty feet?” Cassidy continued, oblivious.
“Or offer it frilly dresses to appease its dread wrath?” Butch rejoined the mocking.
Celestia gritted her teeth, wishing to deliver a retort but know that they had no way of understanding her. She wondered whether or not she should give these mockers a little demonstration of her power.
“Hey Bryce, maybe she’ll spare us if we feed her tea and cakes!”
Celestia wondered a little harder.
Cassidy and Butch continued to laugh for a little while longer, to the point where they were beginning to tax even Celestia’s patience. She restrained herself for the sake of her friends. They might well be blamed if she did anything, and she did not wish to cause them any further difficulty. Eventually, the duo managed to calm themselves down.
“Even if I’ve never seen anything like it,” Cassidy said. “This thing is way too frou-frou to be of any serious value to Team Rocket.”
“And besides,” Butch added. “You losers managed to capture it. That means it can’t be all that, no matter how rare it is!”
“Face it: you idiots screwed up in catching this thing. Again!” Cassidy smirked.
“But what else could we expect from Team Rocket’s biggest failures?”
The duo high-fived one another before walking onwards, laughing all the way.
Later that afternoon, Celestia sat beside Jessie, James, and Meowth, watching as Butch Cassidy began a presentation. They, naturally, had made the trio set up the entire stage set, sound system, and rows of chairs. Then the three were made to sit on three rickety wooden stools in the back. Celestia sat on the soft grass, staring irritably up at Kalos’ new Team Rocket leadership.
“Alright people, listen up!” Cassidy half-shouted into her microphone. “Giovanni himself assigned us to the task of taking down Team Flare, and we’re going to show the boss exactly why he was right to do it!”
“Since a certain group of unnamed morons,” Butch continued, earning chuckles from the audience. “Bungled the last attempt so horribly, we’re gonna have to work double time to fix it all up!”
That only earned groans.
“Shut your pie holes!” Cassidy barked. “Where’s your Team Rocket spirit, you lackies?! We’re going to go out there and kick Team Flare’s badly-dressed behinds like they were month-old tuna salad sandwiches! We’re going to save the world and boss will shower us with glory and rewards! Now who wants in on that?!”
The Rocket grunts raised their fists, cheering.
“That’s what I wanted to hear!” Cassidy pumped her fist. “We’re Team Rocket, the biggest baddest bunch in town! A bunch of freaks in clown suits can’t hope to stand up to us! So let’s go and get ‘em! For Giovanni!”
“For Giovanni!” the crowd echoed.
“For Team Rocket!” she continued.
“For Team Rocket!” they cheered.
“For riches and glory!”
“YEAH!” the Rocket grunts applauded wildly, while the duo waved and looked eminently satisfied. Cassidy even took a moment to glance over at the still-miserable trio, giving them a smug little wink and wave. Jessie bared her teeth.
“Now,” Butch went on after the noise had died down. “Team Flare thinks they got away with beating us last time. They think they’ve already won! But what they don’t realize is that they’re more vulnerable than ever! Because we’re here, and with us at the wheel Team Rocket is going right for the throat!”
The screen behind the duo lit up, revealing a picture that Celestia found uncomfortably familiar.
“For our new battle plan, Team Rocket is going right for the big boss himself, Lysandre,” Cassidy explained. “We’re going to jump that chump and drag him kicking and screaming right back to Giovanni himself!”
“Then, without their leader the rest of Team Flare will be easy pickings,” Butch said. “We can wrest the names of the rest of their leaders from him, and then take them down one by one,” the picture behind him shifted again, this time to a Dark Ball. “And then we’ll hunt down and destroy every last one of these. Giovanni doesn’t want a single one escaping our sight, so keep your eyes open, you got that? Each Dark Ball that you find and destroy earns you a bonus.”
The grunts cheered again. Celestia didn’t care about money and very much disliked these two, but at least they were on the same page. Those devices were evil, and needed to be destroyed as soon as possible.
“And if we catch any one of you so much as thinking about keeping one of those things,” Cassidy glared out. “Giovanni said to tell you that you’ll answer to him, personally!”
Celestia could practically feel the temperature dropping at her words. But that was hardly an unreasonable position to take. She would force anypony she caught doing something similar answer to her as well. Giovanni seemed well-intentioned enough, for all his gruffness.
“To maximize our effectiveness,” Butch pulled out a sheet of paper. “We’re going to be splitting the lot of you into teams with individual assignments. When I call your name, stand up and receive your first assignment.”
And so Butch and Cassidy went through the Rocket grunts one by one. Each man or woman stood up when called, learned the names of their team members, and was given an initial task to do. The process took a few minutes to complete.
“Last,” Butch said at length. “And certainly least, we have Jessie, James, and Meowth.”
Reluctantly, the trio got up from their stools.
“You three get the most important task of all,” Butch smirked a little.
“You get to go set up for our victory celebration,” Cassidy declared, hands on hips. “We’ll need accommodations for, say, a hundred for five days.”
“A fully-stocked buffet.”
“A DJ… no, scratch that. A live band.”
“A reserved section of the Kalos coastline.”
“Oh, and don’t forget to schedule our appointments at a spa,” Cassidy stretched. “Humiliating losers always gives me a yearning for a nice massage.”
“And as punishment for your previous failure,” Butch chuckled. “The whole thing is coming out of your paychecks!”
Jessie, James, and Meowth sank miserably to their knees while the rest of the crowd roared with laughter. On the stage, Butch and Cassidy high-fived one another.
“A huge party and those morons have to pay for it?” Cassidy smiled. “Oh Hutch, you and your brilliant ideas!”
“MY NAME IS BUTCH!”
Stats
Page generated in 0.053 seconds
Total duration
809 users online
1,150,005 hits today, 2,280,440 yesterday
FIMFiction
My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
Designed and coded by knighty & Xaquseg - © 2011-2024
Follow & Support Us
Support us
SubStar
Chat!
Discord
Follow us
Twitter
MLP: Friendship is Magic® - © 2024 Hasbro Inc.®
Fimfiction is in no way affiliated with or endorsed by Hasbro Inc.®
...
Huh?
*Reread*
orig14.deviantart.net/7ea4/f/2008/029/6/3/chuck_boris_by_stavrozinio.jpg
Hey look, it's another type of incompetence.
Oh Barny. You never cease to make me laugh
Also, I'm glad we are getting more updates now. This was one of my favorite MLP/Pokemon crossovers, and I can't wait to see where it goes.
Oh Barry, you and your ideas
Godammit Bitch.
6511593 Who the hell is Butch? You mean Mitch?
I can't wait to see Cassidy and Brad get stuffed.
Man, Bilbo's a real pain huh?
You're still using those scene breaks that are invisible in medium light colors.
does barney have a little Pinkie in him?
and seriously Celestia should have done a beam attack just to shut them up. Doesn't have to aimed towards them.
Man buck get over yourself, and don't insult Celestia like that, or else twilight and luna will send you too the moon.
Hah, can't wait for when the dynamic duo's plan explodes in their faces. Smug pieces of crap. Awesome chapter.
Nice.
I can't wait to see how Luna's getting along.
Welp. That happened.
And I get the distinct impression that Celestia is going to have to bail this particular duo's derriere's when they inevitably get in trouble.
Cassidy and Mitch are going to keep poking the hornets nest known as Celestia, then THEY will be the one's blasting off at the speed of light.
freaks
My, my. The bigger you brag, the harder you fall. By the unwritten rules of the pokemon world, the new "leaders" are in for quite a humiliating defeat.
6511722
Nah, I ment Bareny
Bowly is very angry, I wonder why.
Anyways, not much to say here, besides can we see how Luna is?
Ego and boasting can only get so big before it collapses under Cassidy and Buff's weight. This ought to be good.
Another enjoyable chapter. Good job.
...Once again, just a few pounds of pressure with Psychic and boop, no more human. But then the big story conflict that's being built up would never really amount to much.
Once again, poor Butch gets the shaft
At least he's currently above Jesse, James, and Meowth at the totem pole.
6511593
You mean there are others? WHAT DARK SORCERY IS THIS?
Also, who the buck is Butch? You mean Carl?
I eagerly await more action and suspense.
Oh, how I long to see how badly Cassidy and Buttch screw things up.
Boy, I can't wait to see Celestia lay the smackdown on Cassidy and Baldwin.
I'm gonna go with a compromise here and call you Butt instead.
It kinda suits you anyway.
6514782
6514440
"Butch and femme are terms used to describe individual gender identities in the lesbian, gay, bisexual, transgender and cross-dressing subcultures to ascribe or acknowledge a masculine (butch) or feminine (femme) identity with its associated traits, behaviors, styles, self-perception and so on." - Wiki
6514866
Yeah, no. They're named after the American outlaw Butch Cassidy, just like two members of our trio are named after Jessie James. There's also a duo called Annie and Oakley after, well, take a guess.
6514990
Well I can't wait to see what will Luna do next, and when Twilight goes to see Oak park's pokemons (and meet Ash and co), and also to see Celestia buck Butch's butt!
6514990 I see.
Well. I now know I HATE Cassidy and Arnold. I hope Ash appears again and whips their butts and they have to be saved by Celestia.
Can't wait until Tia loses control! That'll be fu-un!
I really need Celestia to kick Cassidy and Bryan's butts. I sure want to.
These comments are just people trying to come up with clever names for Binder.
Man, it's a shame no one can get such a simple name right. Poor Baloney.
6521860 I know! Why can't they just get Barry's name right?!
Hello there Barney.
What's Mulch's problem? You'd think he'd be a little more professional.
I get the feeling that Team Rocket, our Team Rocket, won't just sit around planning a party while Cassidy, and Benson take all the glory.
6511575 Damnation upon thee, thou madest me rolling!
Well, now we've got two new characters: Cassidy and Bitch. Or Buttch? Both fit.
Meh name is Jeff
Bruce is hilarious. Also, great chapter! AND FINNALY. It's hard going from daily updates to none at all
Poor Bardini, always getting his name wrong...
I always enjoy when Biff's name is said incorrectly.
HutchButch: MY NAMES BUTCH YOU GOT THATNow that's just cruel. But seriously, where is Ash?!
6546319
Points to the fanfic tittle.
6547635 ......touché.
6547615 Let's hope.