• Published 11th Jun 2015
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Celestia's Rocket Adventures - Snake Staff



Celestia winds up in the Pokemon universe. And captured by Team Rocket. Oh dear.

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Recuperation

“You idiots!” Giovanni’s image roared. “You brain-dead ignoramuses!”

Jessie, James, and Meowth cowered in the dirt before the holographic projection of their wrathful boss.

“Do you blundering incompetents have the slightest idea just what you’ve allowed to happen?! You sat around and abused your authority instead of doing the job quickly! You allowed yourselves to be delayed and thwarted by mere children! Because of you there are undoubtedly now anywhere from dozens of hundreds of Dark Balls floating around in enemy hands!” Giovanni folded his hands together and closed his eyes. “The situation has suddenly become much direr. I continue to receive reports suggesting a Flare project to revive the legendary ultimate weapon. Combining the two…” he fell silent, seeming thoughtful.

Eventually, Meowth worked up the courage to poke his head up and speak. “So, uh, boss? What do ya want-”

“Silence!” Giovanni barked.

Meowth promptly pressed his face back into the ground.

“Now then,” he said, a little while later. “Here is what is going to happen. I am going to be sending new agents to the Kalos region. Competent agents. They will take charge of our operations in the region. They will deal with Team Flare in a quick and efficient fashion. You will do everything they tell you to do. Without question or hesitation. Do I make myself clear?”

“Sir, yes sir!” the trio’s jumpy shouts were somewhat muffled by the ground in their faces.

“Consider yourselves very fortunate that you happen to be one of the few teams operating in Kalos and that time is a pressing factor,” Giovanni looked balefully over the trio. “Replacing you would not yet be worth the time and expenditure necessary. And you did bring me actionable intelligence on our enemies,” his tone was hard. “So consider this your chance to partially redeem yourselves in my eyes. Fail me in such a manner again and the consequences will be… most dire.”

The hologram vanished.


“So,” said Celestia, several hours later. “How did it go?”

James replaced the princess’ Poke Ball on his belt and held up another bottle of Super Potion.

“Now hold still and close your eyes,” he said. “This will sting a bit.”

Celestia did as she was bid, squeezing her eyes shut and folding her ears back. She quickly received another dose of the stinging fluid, particularly concentrated on her neck, chest, and right wing. Her body stiffened up and shook just a little beneath the pain, but soon thereafter it faded away into the familiar cool, soothing sensation of her body healing itself. For that was what it was – she now knew that Potions and the like drew on innate energy within Pokemon themselves to induce rapid healing. Infinity Energy, it was called, and it was speculated to be the source of Pokemon attacks as well. For whatever reason, humans did not possess it.

Around a minute later, when James had finished spraying her down and applying bandages to her wings, Celestia opened her eyes again. It was midmorning, the sun shining down on Team Rocket’s improvised camp. Lacking access to their supplies, the trio had been forced to hunker down and spend the night on the dirty forest floor. Looking at Jessie, James, and Meowth, seeing their dilapidated state and the haggard looks in their eyes, Celestia found herself feeling guilty for spending the remainder of the night in her warm, snug Poke Ball.

“Feeling better?” asked James.

“I am,” Celestia nodded.

“Good to hear,” he smiled wearily, giving her a slight scratch behind the ears before walking over to sit down next to his teammates. Whereupon he promptly joined them in staring mutely at the ground, faces downcast.

“This must be so hard for them,” Celestia thought, her own eyes drifting downwards. “To try to stop something so heinous, only to fail… because of… because of…”

Gently, in a manner that could almost be described as tiptoeing, Celestia made her way over to where Team Rocket sat. She lowered herself to the ground next to James and allowed her own eyes to drift to the patch of ground they were all staring at. For some time they all simply brooded in silence, Pumpkaboo and Inkay orbiting lazily overhead.

Eventually, Celestia cast a worried eye back towards her trainer. They’d been sitting there for almost an hour and not one of them had said a word or done anything. It was such a change from how they had been…

She nuzzled James gently on the shoulder. “Is there anything I can do? Would you like to talk about it?”

James was unresponsive.

“I doubt dat’ll help much,” Meowth said mournfully, a few seconds later. “Da boss is really steamed at us dis time.”

“Oh,” Celestia’s ears folded back, her eyes downcast. She’d expected that, but hearing the news made her feel even worse.

“He said he’s gonna replace us,” Meowth continued. “Some new bigshots are comin’ over and we’re gonna be at da bottom of da heap.”

“I’m sorry to-”

“And if we screw up again,” Jessie interrupted. “Then we’re finished.”

“And after how we botched that last job,” James’ tone was miserable. “Who do you think will get blamed if anything goes wrong from now on?”

Celestia looked back and forth between the three, and then hung her head.

“I’m sorry,” she said in a low voice. “I’m so sorry. This is all my fault. If I had been stronger… If I hadn’t been so easily brushed aside…” her teeth clenched, her eyes squeezed shut. “I’ve failed…” small tears trickled down her soft white cheeks. “Again.

Celestia thought of her dear sister. She thought of her niece’s wedding. She thought of the Crystal Empire. She thought of Discord and of Tirek. It seemed that everything she had done lately was a massive failure, wasn’t it? Her plans never worked as intended, always needing to be bailed out by Twilight Sparkle or somepony else just to avert disaster. And when she tried to fight directly, she was bested. Last night, she had been bested again. What good was an outdated princess who could neither think nor fight half as well as-

“Stop that!”

Celestia was yanked from her head by the sound of her trainer’s voice. When she reluctantly opened one eye, she could see from the angle of his chest that he was sitting up much straighter than before. James’ gloved hand gripped her chin firmly, forcing her upward into eye contact with him.

“Now you stop that, do you hear me?!” he said, expression serious.

“But I-”

“Listen to me,” James continued. “I don’t even need Meowth to tell me that you’re blaming yourself for this. As your trainer, I’m telling you to cut that attitude right now! Last night’s failure rests on all of us, not just one of us!”

“But if I had been strong enough to defeat that Gyarados we-”

“No backtalk! I won’t hear of it!” James frowned. “Besides, we can’t just sit around moping about it! We may have failed that one time, but we’ve been through worse! The important thing is that we’re all here, ready to come back better than ever! To just give up and blame ourselves and cry…” he got to his feet, fist clenched. “Why that’s the opposite of what Team Rocket stands for!”

“I never thought I’d say this, but James is right,” Jessie stood up herself. “Look at us! We’ve been moping around like a bunch of sad sacks while Team Flare gets a head start on us! This isn’t the first time we’ve screwed up! This isn’t the first time we’ve blasted off! This isn’t the first time the boss was mad at us! And have we ever given up before?”

“No!” Meowth joined in. “So why should we dis time?!”

“So we’ll work together…” James began.

“Track down Team Flare…” Jessie continued.

“And make ‘dem all pay for insultin’ da dignity of Team Rocket!” Meowth jumped to his feet.

“YEAH!” the three cheered, fists pumping. Inkay and Pumpkaboo raised their own voices in support.

“So no tears!” James whipped back around to Celestia, eyes alight with determination. “No more moping! Now is the time for action! So are you just going to sit there and blame yourself like some kind of weepy little baby Togepi? Or are you going to show true Team Rocket spirit!”

“I…” Celestia hesitated. “I don’t know if I’ll be of any-”

“Come on!” James extended one gloved hand. “Get up! And together we’ll show those Team Flare freaks just what a big mistake they made when they tangled with us!”

“I don’t-” Celestia looked into her trainer’s eyes. For a precious few seconds, they stared at one another Then her own brow creased. “Yes,” she rose gracefully onto all four hooves. “That’s what we’ll do. For the sake of all. And for Team Rocket.”

“That’s the way!” James smiled.

“All for one,” Jessie said, reaching a hand out.

James and Meowth put their hands atop hers. “And one for all!” they echoed.

“Team Rocket’s rockin’!”

“Wobbuffet!”


Shortly thereafter, Celestia was flying high above the dense, swampy forest that seemed to stretch on forever. As the best flier, it naturally fell to her to find a path out of this place and back to Laverre, where Team Rocket’s balloon and supplies still waited. It should have been easy to find one from so high up. Unfortunately, there were a few… complications.

First and foremost was the fact that Team Rocket seemed to have landed in a truly abysmal location. There weren’t any paved roads, buildings, or other such signs of civilization in any direction that Celestia had been able to pick out in the last few minutes. What she could see were a few dirt paths that went hither and yon. Some were obvious dead ends, but others stretched out a good ways away from where Team Rocket now stood. Celestia would have preferred to figure out a route more quickly, but it looked as though she’d just have to follow a trail a good ways until-

Alternatively, she could just ask that man walking along a trail down there.

Why not? She had a decent enough grasp of the local alphabet now. Enough to etch a simple question into the dirt, at any rate. And as a captured Pokemon, she needn’t fear any Poke Ball. It would save a bit of time, and with Dark Balls and perhaps an ultimate weapon about, time was now precious.

“Excuse me, sir?” she called out as she descended towards the trail. “Would you mind-”

Celestia paused as she got a better look at the man. He was, for lack of a better term, enormous. The largest human she had seen in this world, by far. Nine feet or more, easily. His clothing was ragged and battered, as was the red hat atop his head. Long white hair hung down to below his chest, while a green scarf concealed much of his lower face.

But when the man took notice and looked up at the princess, the primary sense that she got from him was one of age. Age and a supreme, all-consuming sense of melancholy. Though what she could see of his expression was neutral and entirely disinterested, Celestia still could almost feel her mood dropping at his mere presence. Not wanting to be rude, she suppressed it and landed in front of him.

“Excuse me,” she said to the towering man. “My friends and I are looking for Laverre City. I was wondering if you could point us in the direction…” she blinked, then chuckled half-heartedly. “What am I saying? Of course you can’t understand me! I need to-”

“The Pokemon…” the man said.

Celestia jumped slightly,

“The flower Pokemon…” he continued, his voice deep but sounding raspy as if from disuse. “The Pokemon that was given eternal life…”

The way he said the last bit made it sound to Celestia’s ears rather like a question.

“I’m sorry,” she shook her head. “I don’t know of any such Pokemon, but I’m-”

The giant simply walked around her, saying nothing more. Despite his slow pace, he seemed to cover ground unnaturally fast.

“Wait!” Celestia called out, despite feeling a little foolish. “Sir! I need to ask you one question! Which way is Laverre from here?”

One of the man’s massive arms pointed, though he did not turn.

“Um…” Celestia glanced in that direction. “Thank you!”

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