• Published 11th Jun 2015
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Celestia's Rocket Adventures - Snake Staff



Celestia winds up in the Pokemon universe. And captured by Team Rocket. Oh dear.

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Terminus

Hours passed, or so it seemed to Princess Luna. Her body continued to deteriorate as Vileplume’s toxins ate away at it. Every step now sent lances of pain up her legs and through her chest, muscles worn almost to the breaking point. Her vision was all but gone, the world around her reduced to random blotches and flashes of color that offered no real sense of anything, much less direction. Eventually she shut them altogether and navigated by her other senses as best she could.

She fell on her face a lot.

Though the princess continued on and on, her pride and determination to find a way home driving her to ignore pain and sweet cry of rest, there was nothing she could find. Without any knowledge of the area she was at a loss for any direction. If there were any other sapients about besides the accursed Haunter, deceased Vileplume, and cowardly Nincada, Luna did not find them. Even finding the massive river again proved a formidable challenge, though at least its cool waters quenched her thirst.

Despite all the pain, despite all the misery, and despite the increasing sense of hopelessness that began to beset her, Luna refused to give in to the part of her that wanted to give up. She was a Diarch of Equestria, Princess of the Moon, Maiden of Dreams, and Vanquisher of the Wicked! She refused to simply lie down and die, no matter what the situation. She would keep going until the last embers of her eternal life faded into cold nothingness.

It was after an indeterminate length of time had passed that gloomy realization sunk in: she was probably going to die here. She, Princess Luna, after all her trials and tribulation, face-offs with the greatest of villains and heroes alike, was going to be killed by poison in another dimension. There was no story to it, no dramatic conclusion, not even a proper burial to reward a life well lived. Just the random dance of predator and prey in world she was not meant to be in and did not understand. Her body would be defiled and consumed. The mere thought of it was… it was…

Luna sank to her knees, then collapsed to the ground altogether. She laid her head gingerly on the damp leaves of the forest floor, and waited.

She did not have to wait long.

Slowly but surely the wind began to pick up. It grew colder, more whispering and malevolent. Laughter hissed through it and into the princess’ ears, malicious and triumphant. At length, it began to speak.

“So,” said Haunter. “You’re finally done. I’ll admit you’ve lasted longer than any other prey I’ve chosen in a long time, but in the end Haunter always gets her way. So,” the creature’s voice got louder. “Now I get to find out what your life force tastes like,” there was a note of anticipation in her tone. “I haven’t tried a new flavor in so long.”

The sound grew closer and closer, until Luna could virtually hear Haunter breathing on top of her.

“I know you can hear me in there,” a cold, clammy claw descended onto Luna’s shoulder. “And so before the end I want you to know-”

She never got the opportunity to finish, for that was exactly what Luna had been waiting for.

With a sudden, wild burst of energy, Luna burst upwards and grabbed for what she calculated had to be Haunter’s central body. It was freezing, clammy, and vaguely insubstantial in her forelegs, but somehow they found a grip. Luna rolled over on the spot, pinning the surprising, writhing Haunter underneath her body.

“GAH!” Haunter screamed. “Get off of me! Damn Dark types to the deepest-”

“If I die here,” Luna’s expression was pure rage. “YOU DIE WITH ME!

With that, Luna plunged one hoof down at Haunter. Raw and unfettered emotion leant it strength, bizarre new rules leant it magic. The upshot was, when it connected, it did so with all the force of a runaway freight train.

Luna’s hoof burst straight through Haunter and out the other side, diving deep into the marshy ground below them both. Her enemy screamed and writhed underneath her, swinging desperately at the princess’ flanks with its claws. It did her no good – Luna simply jammed her horn into the Haunter as well. She gave off one last unearthly shriek, and then there was an immense explosion of icy-cold wind. The sheer force of the localized hurricane was enough to strip trees bare, scour the earth, and send Luna sprawling into the mud.

The princess waited for her foe to pounce. And waited. And waited.

Gradually, it dawned on her that Haunter wasn’t coming back again. Whatever she had just done, it had been enough to put the creature down – or so she hoped. In any case, she was alone again. That was good enough.

Luna attempted to rise. And then attempted it a second time. A third. A fourth. A fifth. By the thirty-seventh, she was starting to get the hint. Her body was finally succumbing to the toxin, shutting down utterly in defiance of her wishes. Perhaps her own use of power against Haunter had sped up the process.

She didn’t regret it.

Throughout her seemingly-endless life, Luna had never really contemplated death in a personal sense. It had always seemed to her that she was destined to live alongside her sister until the end of the world itself and beginning of the next. She had been injured before, and badly too, but the possibility of dying had never seemed as imminent as it did in that moment.

That didn’t mean she was going to blubber and beg fate for more time. On the contrary, Luna spent her last few breaths whispering prayers to the gods above, asking them to watch over her sister and her nation, now that she no longer could. This done, Luna allowed herself to relax and take in the surprisingly peaceful sounds of the nighttime.

The last sound she heard before the darkness of unconsciousness claimed her was that of footsteps and a thin voice.

“…here! This… pretty badly!”

Then her eyes rolled back in her head, and she knew no more.


By the time Celestia returned to Team Rocket’s camp the moon was high in the sky, the fire was burning low and most of the team were curled up in their sleeping bags. Save for James.

“Where have you been?!” he demanded, pointing a finger at her. “You can’t just go running off like that!”

“Actually I can. Further, I can leave at any time. I am not a servant, nor a child,” Celestia paused. “And why am I even bothering to reply? I know you can’t understand me. Do I just enjoy hearing myself talk?”

“Do you have any idea how worried I’ve been?! It’s dangerous out there! I was on the verge of running off into the forest after you!”

“I apologize for causing you concern,” Celestia dipped her head a little. “But I had a good reason for it,” she pointed a hoof at Meowth, curled up tight by the fire. “I suggest you wake him so I can tell you. Your master will want to know this, I think.”

“Uh, you want to wake Meowth?”

Celestia nodded.

James sweatdropped. “Um… that may not be possible. He can get a little… cranky when someone gets him up early.”

Celestia sighed. “Then I will wake him.” She took a few steps over, ignoring James’ uneasy expression, and gently tapped Meowth with one silky-soft feather. “Meowth,” she whispered softly. “It’s time to-”

“HOW DARE YOU INTERRUPT MY CAT NAP?!” he screamed out of nowhere, leaping up to grab Celestia’s muzzle. “TASTE MY FURY SWIPES!!!”

Meowth’s claws shot out and lit up with a bright silvery glow. He raked them across Celestia’s face in swift, diagonal motion, cutting thin lines of red across her snow-white fur. That lasted about a second before the princess’ eyes lit up and a golden glow held the cat Pokemon suspended in the air.

“That was uncalled for!” Celestia snapped, rubbing her stinging face with a hoof.

“DA HECK IT WAS!” Meowth yelled, struggling against her Psychic. “YOU DISRUPTED MY BEAUTY SLEEP! YOU MUST DIE!!!”

In the background, James was waving his hands and looking embarrassed. “Sorry,” he said. “Meowth gets this way sometimes, especially if he’s having nightmares.”

“So I see…” Celestia muttered.

“What is going on here?!” Jessie was rising from her own sleeping bags, rubbing her eyes. “Can’t you great lummoxes keep quiet for just one night?!”

“Sorry! Sorry!” James held up his hands. “It’s just that Celestia had something to say and she needed to wake Meowth and…”

“And it couldn’t wait until morning?” Jessie stretched her arms and yawned.

“Uh…” James sweatdropped. “I don’t know yet.”

“Well then hurry it up and get on with it! Some of us have important beauty sleep to attend to!”

“Meowth, care to-”

“NO!”

“Grrr…” Jessie gritted her teeth and marched up to Meowth. “You listen here, you little furball! I have just been rudely pulled from my bed by your incessant screaming!” she grabbed him by the scruff of his neck. “Seviper made me mad the day I captured him. Do you want to make me mad?”

“Ummm… no?”

“THEN GET ON WITH IT!”

Jessie tossed Meowth to the ground. He landed nimbly on his feet, grimacing and rubbing his neck.

“Alright, alright,” he said. “Geez lousie.” Meowth turned to Celestia and put a hand on his hip. “So, whadaya got ta say, “princess”?”

“I believe that I have determined the identity of Team Flare’s leader, or at least a high-ranking figure.”

“Uh huh,” Meowth looked skeptical. “Go on.”

“The man Lysandre, the proprietor of Lysandre Labs, is involved with your enemies. Just this evening I observed him giving orders relating presumably to the upcoming strike against the Poke Ball Factory. Your stolen documents and your master Giovanni were explicitly mentioned. Lysandre ordered them to proceed as planned, with specific instructions to watch out for Team Rocket.”

“Well Meowth,” Jessie demanded the instant Celestia stopped talking. “What did it say?”

“It’s sayin’ dat the Lysandre Labs guy is in deep with Team Flare. Claimin’ it saw him givin’ orders about the Poke Ball Factory tonight. And dat dey know Team Rocket is onto ‘em.”

“Lysandre’s with Team Flare?!” James looked shocked.

“Well, it would explain the tacky hairstyle…” Jessie mused.

“And I also saw him in possession of a Dark Ball yesterday, though I admit that I cannot confirm this. By the time I saw him next, it no longer appeared to be in his possession.”

“Ahahahahaha!” Meowth laughed. “Now I know she’s makin’ it up!”

“Why?” Jessie asked.

“Cause she’s sayin’ dat she saw Lysandre with a Dark Ball!” Meowth chuckled. “Does were all destroyed years ago!”

“A Dark Ball?” James said. “You’re certain?”

“I admit that I cannot be 100% sure of what it was,” Celestia admitted. “But I do trust my… intuitions.”

“Well I don’t,” Meowth crossed his arms and waved one hand airily in Celestia’s direction. “Dis broad is clearly havin’ another one of her episodes, so I say we just go back to bed and leave her ta talk to da grass or whatever else she feels like doin’.” He turned around and began walking back towards the fire.

“Really?” Celestia’s tone was flat. “You of all people?”

“Hmmm?” Meowth’s ears twitched and he glanced back.

“After stealing my idea for searching the briefcase, then ignoring my advice on the wind to your friend’s peril, you’re simply to brush off what I have to say about this?”

Meowth’s expression said nothing.

“Think about it. Do I seem insane to you? Am I some kind of raving lunatic or compulsive liar? Think what you will about my origins, but at the very least you must admit to yourself that my observational skills are not lacking,” Celestia spread her wings. “Please, consider. What have I to gain by lying to you? Why would I wish to oppose your mission to protect the world from devastation? Please, just believe me when I tell you that Lysandre is involved with Team Flare, and that he was carrying a Dark Ball.”

Meowth hesitated, glancing back and forth between the princess and the ground.

Celestia’s own gaze quickly caught his. As they stared, she invited him in, imploring the cat Pokemon to see the truthfulness in her eyes. It was an old, non-magical diplomatic ploy she’d perfected millennia ago. The two Pokemon stared at one another for some seconds, Jessie and James just looking on in confusion.

At last, Meowth broke the eye contact.

“Guys,” he said. “I think I believe her dis time.”

“Really?”

“You’re sure?”

“I don’t think she’s lyin’ about dis,” Meowth sighed before clenching a fist. “We gotta tell da boss.”


“You are certain?” Giovanni’s projected image said, almost an hour later. “Lysandre, a member of Team Flare?”

“We have it on good authority that he is at the least involved in directing their operations in the vicinity of Laverre City, sir,” Jessie answered.

“Then he and his company will need to be tagged for surveillance by other assets,” Giovanni said. “You did well to notice this. But… a Dark Ball? You are absolutely sure of this?”

“Our intelligence there is… less clear,” James admitted. “The witness sighting cannot be confirmed.”

“It is hard to credit,” Team Rocket’s leader stroked his Persian. “Those were supposed have been destroyed years ago. To hear of one popping up now… in Kalos of all places…” he shook his head. “It is not something that one would expect to hear. One might almost think you were lying to me.”

Jessie, James, and Meowth shrank back from the screen a little.

“Fortunately,” Giovanni continued after a brief pause. “I don’t believe you three to be the type of agents who would make up such a wildly implausible story. If you say that it could have been a Dark Ball, I am inclined to take you at your word.”

“Thanks a million, boss!” Meowth said, fists clenched and stars in his eyes. “Ya won’t regret dis, I promise!”

“I should hope not.”

There was a pause in the conversation while Giovanni stroked his Persian with one hand, putting two fingers of the other on his chin. The trio’s boss considered for about thirty seconds by Celestia’s count before continuing.

“The question now becomes, what do we do about this?” he mused. “I think it is clear that if Team Flare has indeed come into possession of a Dark Ball, then the upcoming move on the Poke Ball Factory must be related. The most likely scenario is that they wish to use the machinery there to replicate it in bulk. At full capacity that factory can create hundreds of Poke Balls of any synthetic design per hour,” he sat up straight, gaze firm. “They must not be allowed to succeed in creating a run of Dark Balls.”

“What do ya want us ta do, boss?” Meowth asked.

“I will be sending more agents in the region to the vicinity of Laverre immediately,” said Giovanni. “To be placed under your temporary command. Your success so far has convinced to allow you to take the lead in this operation.”

“Really?!” all three gasped in perfect unison.

He nodded.

“THANK YOU BOSS!!!” they cheered.

“You will keep the factory under constant surveillance. Be aware that Team Flare likely has spies among the workers, and plan accordingly. The night before they are due to strike, I want you to move in and sabotage all of the factory’s vital components. There is no sense in taking chances. And then, when they do attack, take your men and ambush them. Bring as many as possible back alive.”

“Sir yes sir!”

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