• Published 11th Jun 2015
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Celestia's Rocket Adventures - Snake Staff



Celestia winds up in the Pokemon universe. And captured by Team Rocket. Oh dear.

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The First Battle

“Good job, James,” Jessie said, taking a few steps forward and putting on hand on her partner’s shoulder. “I’ll admit I’m impressed how quickly you caught that thing.”

“Yeah,” Meowth added, strolling leisurely up. “But what is it? I never saw a Pokemon like ‘dat before.”

Jessie looked down at the Poke Ball, frowning. “Some kind of weird mutant Rapidash, you think?”

“A Ditto what ate one too many Big Mushrooms?” Meowth guessed.

James shook his head. “No, I’ve seen plenty of Rapidash… and I don’t think it’s a Ditto…” His brow furrowed.

“Well whatever it is, it’s definitely very rare!” Jessie declared. “We should send it to the boss right away!”

“No,” James shook his head again.

“What?!” Jessie looked startled. “Why not?”

“Did ya forget last time we sent the boss a rare Pokemon when we wasn’t sure what it did?” Meowth berated her. “He didn’t even want dat Togepi! We were a laughin’stock!”

“He’s right, Jessie.”

“Well,” she considered. “I suppose you do both have a point. Okay, send it out and we’ll see what it can do.”

“Not yet.”

“What now?” she sounded exasperated.

“Couldn’t you tell? The poor thing was plain tuckered out. It needs a good long rest.”

Jessie sighed. “Fair enough, I suppose," she straightened out. "Let’s keep going then.”

“Right behind you.”

James replaced the now-filled Poke Ball on his waist. The two humans resumed their walk down the dirt path towards their hidden balloon with slow, sedate steps. Their Pokemon companion found it easy enough to keep up and, as he was prone to do, began to daydream.

“Just imagine,” Meowth said as they went. “What the boss’ll say when we bring him ‘dis Pokemon and Pikachu!”

“We’ll get a promotion for sure!” Jessie clenched her fist, eyes shining.

“And a raise!” added James.

“And I’ll be Giovanni’s top cat! No doubt about it!” Meowth laughed.

Jessie continued. “So today’s the day, team!”

“The day we finally beat the twerps!”

“An’ catch Pikachu!”

“Let’s go get ‘em!”

All three cheered, “Team Rocket’s rockin’!”


“Prepare for trouble, ‘cause trouble’s what you’re in!”

“And make it double, because we’re going to win!”

“To protect the world from devastation!”

“To unite all peoples within our nation!”

“To denounce the evils of truth and love!”

“To extend our reach to the stars above!”

“Jessie!”

“James!”

“This day’s gone our way at the speed of light!”

“So surrender now or be crushed in a fight!”

“Meowth, that’s right!”

“Wobbuffet!” Jessie’s blue Pokemon added, as always.

“Team Rocket!” Ash Ketchum shouted up at the rapidly-rising Meowth-shaped hot air balloon. “Not you guys again!”

“Yes!” Jessie laughed. “Us again!”

“And we’ve got your Pikachu this time, so ‘dere!” Meowth gloated from the basket’s edge, holding up a remote.

Attached to the bottom of the balloon was an extendable robotic arm ending in a powerful, thoroughly insulated three-fingered hand. In that hand writhed a small, yellow, mouselike Pokemon: Ash’s Pikachu, the trio’s obsession and primary target for years. Pikachu unleashed the same electric volts that had sent Team Rocket flying countless times, but to no avail against the arm.

“Well, I hate to steal and run, but we really must be going! Ta ta!” James taunted as they gained altitude.

“Oh no you don’t!” Ash grabbed a Poke Ball from his waist and tossed it upwards. “Go Frogadier!”

The red and white ball exploded into a brilliant flash of white light, which quickly formed itself into a blue, froglike Pokemon. Frogadier posed confidently, looking ready to leap.

“Frogadier, use Water Pulse on Team Rocket’s balloon!” Ash ordered.

“Froooo” the Pokemon began forming a blue-white ball of energy between its two forelegs. “Gadier!” It flung the orb upwards, directly at the retreating trio.

“Oh no you don’t! Wobbuffet, Mirror Coat!” Jessie countered.

“Wobbuffet!” her Pokemon jumped onto the edge of the balloon’s basket. Swiftly, it surrounded itself with a layer of shimmering, semitransparent energy. Frogadier’s attack smashed into that layer, only to immediately bounce off and back the way it had come. Ash’s Pokemon jumped to avoid the projectile, which hit the ground with a tremendous explosion.

“Go Pumpkaboo!” Jessie called, throwing a Poke Ball.

“Inkay, you too!” James added his own.

Ash’s friends weren’t idle either.

“Braixen, let’s go!” Serena called out her first and primary Pokemon.

“Luxray, you’re on!” Clemont shouted.

Four Pokemon burst onto the scene at the exact same moment. On Team Rocket’s side were a flying orange-black pumpkin and a miniature floating cuttlefish, while the “twerps” had a bipedal fiery fox and a large, blue-black feline.

“Frogadier, Water Pulse!”

“Braixen, Flamethrower!”

“Luxray, Discharge on Inkay!”

A blue-white orb, a trail of orange flame, and streams of yellow electricity hurdled skyward.

“Dodge and use Shadow Ball!” Jessie commanded.

“Inkay, Psybeam!” James directed.

Team Rocket’s Pokemon flew sideways, attempting to dodge around the incoming attacks. Pumpkaboo soared nimbly around fire and electricity alike before forming a small purple orb near its mouth. It grew rapidly into a ball almost as large as the Pokemon itself before plummeting down to explode against Braixen, slamming Serena’s Pokemon into the dirt. Inkay wasn’t quite so lucky. It managed to aigly weave between the electricity and fire, but one of its tentacles clipped the edge of Water Pulse, which exploded on it.

“Inkay, no!” James called, holding out a hand.

“Discharge, one more time!” Clemont ordered.

Luxray again formed a yellow field of energy around itself, before sending it all flying up into the air. The attack converged rapidly on the stunned Inkay, scoring a direct hit and thoroughly inundated the little Pokemon’s system with electricity. James’ Pokemon flew up and backwards, directly at Team Rocket’s balloon. Inkay crashed full on into Meowth, sending both tumbling backwards into the basket.

“Inkay!” James hurried to the downed Pokemon’s side. “Are you alright?! Speak to me!”

“Kaaaaay…” mumbled the clearly incapacitated cephalopod.

“Forget da squid!” Meowth’s voice cut it. “Da remote!”

“Huh?” Jessie and James said simultaneously, looking down. Meowth was holding up two cracked, sparking pieces of the remote that had controlled their trap. Their eyes widened.

Below the balloon, the robotic arm holding Pikachu was going haywire. Its processor receiving a dozen mixed signals at one time, it jerked this way and that without direction, giving its occupant a thorough shaking. At last, the three fingers flew open, and Ash’s Pikachu plummeted towards the earth. Frogadier was on the case, leaping dozens of feet into the air in a single bound. It caught Pikachu in its forelegs as they fell, and landed with all the effortless grace of a ninja frog.

“Pika Pika,” Pikachu voiced his thanks to its friend as it hopped back to the ground. “Chu!” he glared at Team Rocket.

“Alright, everybody!” Ash pointed. “Get Pumpkaboo!”

Jessie’s Pokemon dodged frantically through the air as attack after attack from four separate Pokemon converged on it from all angles. Nimble and small though it was, the effort was taxing it to its limit. Pumpkaboo cried out in pain as it was clipped by another Flamethrower from a vengeful Braixen.

“James!” Jessie grabbed her partner’s shirt, shaking him. “Pikachu’s getting away! Do something!”

“But Inkay’s the only Pokemon I have with me!” James protested, shrinking before her.

“What about that thing you caught this morning?!” Jessie demanded. “Use that!”

“But it hasn’t had enough chance to rest! And I don’t even know what it can-”

USE IT!!!” Jessie shouted at the top of her lungs. As if to punctuate her sentence, Pumpkaboo shrieked as it was caught full in the face by yet another Flamethrower. The little Ghost/Grass Pokemon looked very shaky after that blow.

“Right,” James nodded weakly, reaching for his Poke Ball. He tossed it downwards at his twerpish foes. “Go!”

Ash and his friends looked on as yet another Pokemon took shape before their eyes. When the brief white flash faded away, they all gasped as one.

“What’s that?” asked Clemont’s little sister, Bonnie.

“No idea,” Ash pulled out his Pokedex and held the machine’s camera up to the strange creature.

“Pokemon unknown,” said the Pokedex in its calm monotone. “No data.”

“No way!” Serena gasped. “Since when does Team Rocket have a Pokemon like that?”

“I bet they probably stole it,” Ash growled, picturing the misery its old trainer must be going through.

The strange, white, rainbow-maned Pokemon, for its part had turned around. It was looking up at Team Rocket’s balloon with its purple eyes and speaking rapidly. “Les. Les,” it said. “Tia!”

Ash gritted his teeth. “Well, whatever it is, we’re not gonna let it take our Pokemon! Pikachu, Iron Tail!”

“Pika!”


“You brigands!” Princess Celestia was saying. “You tricked me! How dare you attack my person! How dare you lure strangers in with kindness only to steal them away! Do you not know what the penalty is for abducting Equestrian royalty in such a manner-”

So great was her indignant fury that the princess had not been paying particular attention to what was going on around her. She would not have had a proper frame of reference regardless, but at that moment her attention was focused entirely on berating her treacherous captors. Yes, she had heard something about an iron tail – what was that anyway? – but wasn’t truly listening to Ash.

At the last second, Celestia spotted out of the corner of her eye a small yellow creature leaping into the air at her, its tail glowing a bright white. As it flew through the air, it brought its tail around and smacked her in the face.

Pain like Celestia hadn’t known since her niece’s wedding exploded throughout her. Despite her vastly greater mass, the yellow creature’s attack sent her soaring through the air. The princess smacked against the dirt once, twice, three times before rolling a considerable distance through the dirt to lie in a crumpled heap.

“Super effective,” Celestia could vaguely make out a mechanical monotone reciting. “Type identified: Fairy.”

“What in all the worlds did you do that f-” she mumbled, struggling to stand.

Celestia was cut off by a shouting boy in blue clothing and a red hat. “Frogadier, hit it while it’s down! Water Pulse!”

“Taaaaake…” a blue frog said. “This!”

“GAH!” Celestia screamed as a blue-white orb slammed directly into her chest. She was flung backwards yet again, this time completely soaked in icy-cold water. That’s what her rational side thought it was, at any rate. From the way it burned on her skin, it might as well have been acid.

“Super effective,” said the same mechanical voice that the princess was rapidly growing to hate. “Type identified: Fire. Pokemon classified: Fairy/Fire type.”

“Pikachu, Thunderbolt!”

“Luxray, Discharge!”

Celestia screamed again as she was hit with thousands of volts of electricity at once. What the hay was going on here? What had she done to these creatures? Had she harmed them? Deceived them? Even been impolite to them? No! And for that she had been rewarded with abduction and then pain, and lots of it. The princess was a famously forgiving soul, but there were limits. And so despite her injury and weakness, she felt a fire seizing her insides.

“You,” she began to force her trembling legs upwards. “Little,” her eyes looked practically ablaze. “VERMIN!

A powerful wave of force swept out from Celestia, smashing into ground, plants, and Pokemon alike. Pikachu, Braixen, Luxray, and Frogadier alike were bowled over and sent hurdling backwards across the ground, landing at their trainers’ feet.


“Whoa!” Ash marveled, having barely kept his own feet even at a considerable distance. Bonnie and Clemont hadn’t been so lucky.

“Move identified,” the Pokedex said blandly, as if nothing of note were happening. “Psychic.”

“That’s powerful,” Ash gritted his teeth, but then looked down at Pikachu and smiled. “But nothing we can’t handle, right buddy?”

“Pika!” Pikachu nodded as he picked himself up.

The attack seemed to have taken a lot out of Team Rocket’s new Pokemon. It was looking down at the grass beneath its hooves, breathing heavily. Ash could clearly make out sweat dripping down its face.

“Pikachu, use Iron Tail!”

“Braixen,” Serena shouted. “Use Flamethrower on Pumpkaboo!”

Pikachu darted forward on all fours, while Braixen waved its stick and sent another stream of fire skywards. Almost simultaneously, the attacks connected. Jessie’s Pokemon took the full fury of the fire directly to the face, while Pikachu’s tail hit the underside of the other’s chin. Both Pokemon flew upwards, crashing into Team Rocket’s balloon one after the other.

“Now Pikachu!” Ash pointed. “Thunderbolt!”

“Pikaaaaa… Chuuuu!”

An enormous bolt of electricity arced skywards, impacting directly against the Meowth head balloon. Humans and Pokemon alike screamed as the electricity coursed through the entire craft, giving ample attention to each inhabitant. And then the overstressed balloon exploded.

“Looks like Team Rocket’s blasting off again!”

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