• Published 11th Jun 2015
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Celestia's Rocket Adventures - Snake Staff



Celestia winds up in the Pokemon universe. And captured by Team Rocket. Oh dear.

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New Faces

When Princess Luna awoke, she was in a good deal of pain.

Her insides felt as though somepony had flushed acid through them, leaving raw, quivering alicorn organs behind. Her muscles too felt strangely wet and raw, stinging with the cold pain of wintery winds. Her stomach grumbled incessantly between contractions, as though trying to decide between purging itself and begging for food. Her skull was practically split by a pounding headache, which pulsed and throbbed with every loud beat of her heart.

But pain, Luna could take. Pain was a good thing. It meant that she was still alive to feel it. Besides the pain, she could feel something cool, soft, and wet beneath her prone body. The air itself seemed cool and damp here, in contrast to the muggy oppressiveness she last remembered feeling.

With a will born through the innumerable travails of millennia, the princess forced her creaking, aching neck to rise a little. And then she lifted her heavy eyelids and took in her surroundings. Her vision, she immediately noted, was much better than it had last been. Her blue eyes could make out what she now recognized for a decent-sized, damp cave easily, piercing the dark as well as they ever did. This place was almost entirely lightless, wet off-white rock as far as she could see, save for a small speck of white light in the far distance. When her gaze shifted downwards, Luna noted that she was sprawled atop what appeared to be an improvised mat of long green leaves.

“Oh,” came the sound of a soft, high-pitched voice. “You’re finally awake.”

Luna’s ears stood on end.

“Who…” she managed, voice raspy and hoarse. “Who goes… there?”

Moments later, her eyes picked up movement in the dark. Gritting her teeth against the pain, the princess forced her neck to swivel about and give her a clear view. The figure she saw was a tiny thing, not even the size of her head. It seemed to float in the air, hanging by some miniature umbrella.

No, Luna realized as it got closer, not an umbrella. The tiny white creature hung in the air from an odd-looking flower. Its upper body was white and vaguely humanoid, with two arms, a neck, and a head. In place of eyebrows, odd blue shoots seemed to simply sprout from above its eyes, white red lumps with trailing white protrusions took the place of ears. Its lower body was a blue, tail-like thing terminating in a heart shape. The flower it seemed to cling to was a red thing with six sharp petals arranged in twin triangles, with patterns of black on the larger three.

“Hello,” the creature said in its distinctly feminine voice. “My name is Floette.”

Luna wasn’t entirely sure what to make of this creature, and something of it must have shown in her face.

“Don’t be afraid,” said Floette, gently shifting her flower to point the petals at Luna. “I’m not going to hurt you.”

The flower lit up gently, and from its end came a small cloud of soft pink. Luna immediately held her breath as it washed over her. She tried to rally her weakened body to get up, to run, but for the moment that seemed beyond her. She managed almost two minutes before she had to give in, sucking in air and a great deal of pink in one massive gasp.

Immediately Luna’s quivering body began to relax. The sweetest aroma she had ever smelt rushed down her trachea and into her lungs, permeating her body. The pain began to recede at once, while her muscles felt as though they had turned into a soft jelly. She sank slowly back onto her mat, smiling almost in spite of herself.

“My Aromatherapy,” Floette said. “It purged the poison from you. It will help you get better.”

“Mmm…” Luna managed a vague nod.

“I can also use Wish. That will heal you more, alright? But I’ll need to get basically on top of you.”

“Do it,” Luna said.


Twin massive piles of books, easily mistaken for fortress walls, surrounded Princess Twilight Sparkle. Professor Oak, as she had hoped from an academic, had a massive collection of literature for her browse through. The first step, obviously, had been learning to read. Fortunately there were a great many similarities between the written language of this land – called Kanto, she now knew – and that of Neighpon back home. At any other time such a comparison would have made for a fascinating subject of study on its own, but for the moment the princess was simply glad that learning to read hadn’t been too hard.

This world was very different from Equestria. The sun and moon, as in the other human world she’d visited, moved on their own. The climate was uncontrolled, and the weather up to nature and plain luck. Far more important were the creatures known as Pokemon, which existed alongside humans in a strange relationship with no exact parallels to home. Though they were sentient, and in many cases sapient, no Pokemon species had ever achieved civilization. Though fully capable of using it if supplied, none had ever built technology. They could tap into a strange phenomenon known only as Infinity Energy – Twilight suspected it to be magic by another name – to cause physically impossible effects on their own or under human command. The creatures were a strange mix of mythical beast, wild animal, and intelligent being.

And, insofar as Twilight knew, she was one.

As she recovered more and more the princess submitted to several of Oak’s tests, one of which indicated that she was a Fairy/Psychic type Pokemon. That meant that she should resist Fighting and Psychic moves, while being vulnerable to Ghost, Poison, and Steel attacks. It was useful information to have, if she ever got into another fight here. If she had time, Twilight decided that learning some moves of her own might be useful. And whatever ability she had, if any, was still an unknown.

But more important than anything to Twilight was trying to decide what to do next. The way that the princess saw it, she had two primary options: attempt to locate the other princesses first, or start by seeking a way back home. Each had it pluses and minuses. On the one hoof, what if Celestia or Luna was in danger? On the other, would she even be able to find them without her magic? And even if she did, could she get to them? The world was very big, and they could have landed absolutely anywhere in it. By herself, finding the two of them could take years – decades even!

But if she were able to find, or create, a way home first, the process might be greatly expedited. Not only would she be able to perform proper scrying spells, but she could call in backup. Her friends, the guard, Discord even. Together they would stand a much better chance of actually locating Celestia and Luna. And the diarchs of Equestria were strong, not easily beaten down. They could take care of themselves for a little while. Right? So it was only rational that the first thing she should do would be to seek to establish a stable route home instead of blindly wandering through this strange world in the hopes of blundering into them. That made sense, didn’t it?

Twilight wasn’t entirely without her doubts about the idea, but the more she pondered it the more convinced she became. She was in a laboratory with one the world’s preeminent scientists. She had all the knowledge of her world and his right her at her hooftips. This was an excellent place to research, to plan, and to build. And she wouldn’t have to break her silence on the subject of her fellows. She wouldn’t even have to lie about what she was doing to Professor Oak. That seemed to her the most level-headed course, the one most likely to produce results for them all.

So Twilight Sparkle began to plan.


The journey back to Laverre City and Team Rocket’s deflated balloon took almost three days on foot. From there Celestia watched the trio pack up their camp, contact their superior, and re-inflate the Meowth balloon to its full extent. Then it was a mere few hours balloon ride to a random patch of wilderness only noteworthy for the collection of Rocket grunts already waiting there. Celestia noted the resentful stares the men and women gave Jessie, James, and Meowth. Some of them stared at her with something more akin to envy, though none of them said a word.

A few hours of waiting, a quick meal, and some idle chit-chat later all four of them stood among the ranks of the other Rockets. Save for the princess herself, every one of them was ramrod straight. High overhead a black aircraft with whirring rotary blades could be seen in the distance, rapidly drawing near. As it did Celestia briefly found herself wondering for the umpteenth time if this whole thing was a good idea, whether she might be better off on her own. Then she remembered what she had felt from the Dark Ball, and such doubts vanished. That thing was evil, and morality demanded that she do everything in her power to destroy it and defeat its wielders. And besides, she found she kind of liked “her” trio.

A minute later the transport touched down in the open field where they stood, rotary blades slowly coming to a halt. A latch on its side opened up, and a small staircase descended towards the ground. Shortly thereafter two figures appeared at the entrance, a man and a woman.

As one, Jessie, James, and Meowth gasped.

“Cassidy!” they looked at the woman, and then turned their heads to her partner. “And Bob!”

“THE NAME IS BUTCH!”

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