• Member Since 27th Aug, 2014
  • offline last seen Feb 15th, 2016

TheStupidCupid


Howdy. I work with animals and I love ponies. And I love when ponies are in love. Because we all do stupid things when we're in love. :D

Comments ( 158 )

Hmm, I wonder why this has so many dislikes. Clop may not be my thing, but this isn't badly written by any means. :trixieshiftright: Maybe they where jealous of the fabulouscity of BarbieCord.

5965237
Yeah, I'm a bit confused myself. I didn't think I was doing too badly actually. :(

This is hilarious and amazing!

Why does it have so many downvotes? Please continue!

5979578 I have a theory...

With the new episode coming up, the tensions between Fluttercord shippers and Dislestia shippers is petty high. Maybe this is just some blind hate? Shipping wars are crazy man.

But that doesn't matter! This is very well written!

5980441

I've noticed both Fluttercord and Dislestia stories get a huge load of downvotes when first posted. I'm sure the mad shippers don't even read the stuff sometimes!

I'm really enjoying this so far, and the Godfather bit was hilarious.

I'm guessing that FlashLight is the main reason for downvotes. I haven't seen single Flash story without couple dozen dislikes.

OMG this is the best mature Fluttercord fic I've ever read. It's really refreshing to see this sort of content done humourously- it's very in character.

The pillow shot to the other side of the room

/Crying :rainbowlaugh:

This is so hilarious. Grinning ear to ear XD

They're so awkward XD has Discord never smelled a mare in heat before? Then again he was trapped in stone for 1000 years, lol

6000589

My theory in my own fics with regard to Discord's awkwardness is he's been in stone for so long he's forgotten how to feel things, including how to interact with mares who go into season. He knows something tantalizing is going on but is so used to feeling numb in stone that it's taking him a while to realize his attraction to Fluttershy.

Otherwise I don't think he'd be that naive--but that's a minor point because I'm loving the hell out of this fic.

Oh dear! Am on the edge of my seat!

"A colt is a male pony!"

Snort. Well done, Discord.

finally this is getting good ^_^

6009107
Either that or draconequui are only affected by ponies in heat if they actually care about the pony, which presumably he never did before.

Given that:
- the fact that he's affected by her heat suggests that he's biologically compatible with her and could be fertile with her;
- the normal response by pre-sapient ponies to a draconequus cub would probably be fear, and abandoning it or killing it
- a pony who is acclimated to a draconequus and affectionate with one would not have such a reaction, and would fight to defend its cub if it doesn't perceive the cub as too weird to be its foal

...there's actually a potential evolutionary explanation for this. Male draconequui shouldn't mate with female members of their "parent" species, even if they are fertile with such, unless that female is accustomed to draconequui. So if a male draconequus is affectionate to a mare (or presumably a female dragon), this makes it significantly more likely that she would actually take care of his child if he mated with her, and it's a waste of his time to mate with ponies that fear draconequui. Now that they're all sapient, this biological response would translate as draconequui being vulnerable to pony or dragon heat pheromones if they are friendly with that pony or dragon. So Fluttershy would be the first pony in heat that Discord cares enough about to be affected by.

6014292

True. Lots of creatures in nature have similar mating patterns and it's all down to female sexual selection. Fluttershy feels safe around him so paradoxically (from his point of view) she's chosen him as a mate--of course Discord doesn't think she's safe around him, but I have a feeling Fluttershy isn't going to complain about that!

:flutterrage: Do ME Discord!

:raritystarry:Spikey did you hear that?
:moustache: Lucky shy !

:twilightoops: He's over a thousand years old

:raritywink: and I thought I had strange tastes
:moustache: exotic ?
:duck: Yes exotic erotic come Spikey to the boutique we have work to do
:moustache: didn't we fin.....
:raritywink: come precious scales
:facehoof:

6009107 That is the only way this story makes sense. But it is a good explanation.

This story is hilarious. This is awkward, sexual comedy done right. And they seem pretty in character. Well, as much as they can feel when you take characters from a children's cartoon and put them in a plot like this.

The derailing chain of thought comment was brilliant.

You have a few mistakes here and there, mostly superfluous words, like two "is" in a sentence that only needs one and such.

Still fun. Lots of mistakes though. This needs another proofreading to get all the little mistakes. Oddly placed words, missing words and more superfluous words (many unnecessary "the"). You even shifted to second person narrative for a moment, in "In a heartbeat, you put her hooves to her mouth with a horrified squeak.".

Also, a chest doesn't beat, a heart beats.

Also: "breath" is the noun. You "take a breath". But "you breathe".

Also, you are well within your right to use caps for shouting but if you do, you can't write "“YES!” She squealed in a voice barely above a whisper." Because then she is both loud and silent and that makes no sense. And not in the fun kind of way just in the "messy writing" kind of way.

Also, also: She leans into his paw, but the narrative never mentions him putting a paw on him. That is a mistake. You can only lean into something that is already touching you.

Please tell me this isn't going to turn rapey. Please.

Cautiously optimistic about the next chapter. Happy writing.

6015777

Please tell me this isn't going to turn rapey. Please.

I admit I have similar concerns, but would like to give the author the benefit of the doubt- after all, Discord is only assuming she isn't as into it as him, when it's clear they're both under the influence of hormones and gravitating towards each other.

6015777

Yeah, you're absolutely right. I've noticed a lot of spelling errors in this chapter and changes in tone that I didn't get to catch since I didn't get a chance to proofread before I posted. I will be more careful with the next chapter.

As far as rapey, no rape will occur. But there is going to be a lot of confusion. This is only like 15% of the story at the moment.

6018866

Confusion is good. It means more funny. :trollestia:

“I’m a barbie girl, in a barbie world. Life in plastic! It’s fantastic.”

Haha! Nice.

Hahahaha!
The last few lines were brilliant.
Only Discord. :trollestia:

Of all the stories I have ever read, this is the most anticlimactic one-by far. That's not a bad thing, though, if there are more chapters incoming.
Anyway, this story seems like it could go on forever at this rate :derpytongue2:

I absolutely died at the wrestling with his paw bit.

But ooooh shit. Now what? Poor Fluttershy. Poor Discord. OTOH, it might be better for them both to make love when they're a bit less...under the influence!

Aggh I love this story! Discord is so in character it's awesome!

Omg only now i realized that Discord personality remind me of Tyrion Lannister, especially with his sarcastic talk and jokes. They also had troubled love life in the past. And Sansa Stark was also more like Fluttershy
Anyway it's a great story, narration from Discord point of view is hilarious and i love that someone finally addressed sexual encounters in FlutterCord shipfics without creating a plain clopfic but actually making a realistic scenario within the boundaries of the established universe.

This is quite a lot of fun. I must admit it does feel just a bit rapey to me, considering most of Fluttershy's thoughts kinda amount to "no". But it's not so bad that I can't stomach it.

A few comments:

"Her mind was completely blown to the point where the 3rd person narrative persona had to step in to try to explain what was going on until she could finally Oh my goodness! Oh my goodness! Is he kissing me?? I can’t breathe!" Please don't break the fourth wall like that. Your writing is better than that.

" Fluttershy giggled as she got into a catcher’s position. “Throw me the key and I will catch it and unlock the door.” I burst out laughing here, mostly because I immediately thought of what that is slang for, along with "receiver"... But then again, it is your fault for getting my mind in the gutter.

"Discord froze as a cold chill seized his body. His eyes shot open and he pulled back from the prostate pegasus quickly." It is "prostrate". That means "lying". "Prostate" without the "r" is the little thing men get cancer in... Ya know, in the back?

Fun though.

Great chapter. Fun and with some good emotion.

One thing, I think it is "god-like" with a hyphen. Now go write more!

Happy writing.

lol I knew Discord wouldn't be able to keep away from her. He has all the willpower of a lettuce.

“Yes, the right mates,” he wondered dreamily. Both males became lost in their thoughts for a moment, each dreaming about their own pony. Spike came to first and coughed awkwardly. “Um...Discord?”
“Yes my love?”
“What?!”

bahahaha

My one nitpick is I don't think Discord would be that naive about same sex relationships, but that's probably just a personal bugbear of mine because I write him as pansexual. :)

So... is the book way overestimating the effect of the heat on others, and the girls know what they're doing by distracting Fluttershy...

Orrrr are they just as clueless and the boys fears are justified?

Either way it's going to end badly!~

6092608 Well Applejack kept inside all her first heat, I'm guessing the other girls got similar instructions from parents or female guardians. They're probably unaware of the effects. Even Twilight hasn't read every book in the library she just gave Shy what she needed.

6092734
yes, not to spoil too much but yes this is exactly the case of not knowing.

I love this
I actually enjoy Discord being clueless about gay couples and i think he would also be clueless about sex since as the only Draconequus he never had an occasion to mate with other of his kind and since he had no friends, he also had no occasion for romance. I also doubt he would ever force himself on anyone. So i guess instead pansexual i see him more as not-entirely asexual. As in, when he discover first love, then his body react for the first time, maybe like something similar to Doctor Who or Sherlock, who are just not really focused on sexual intercourse. I know many people see him as someone who had a lot of experience but i think it would also fit since he act as immature as Spike in canon XD

6092194

My one nitpick is I don't think Discord would be that naive about same sex relationships, but that's probably just a personal bugbear of mine because I write him as pansexual. :)

To be fair, this version of Discord is clueless enough that he didn't even recognize Fluttershy's heat at first. If he's not a virgin, he's plainly pretty close to it.

6093100

You can be good at sex but terrible at relationships. It fits with the Trickster archetype. I'm willing to buy the fact that Discord is clueless about pony reproduction though as his previous flings may not have necessarily been ponies. For example, Baast.

6093145

Oh snap, I just addressed this in my reply to Conred. Good timing, Mammoth. lol

Well he know he's a not a virgin in this fic as his having sex with Baast was mentioned. But he does seem to be a virgin when it comes to ponies.

6093087 It doesn't really seem like a spoiler just cause logically they wouldn't do that to themselves.

6093145
6092194 Discord was in stone for 1000 years, back when he was loose same sex couples just simply may have not been a thing.

6093152
Yeah i know he isn't a virgin in this story becasue he met Baast who probably played a role of a teacher but storywise she could just flirt with him in the comics for the first time and it woudn't be so wierd for such god like creature to have billions other things to do than learning about reproduction when he is immortal and doesn't need an offspring to maintain his species (nor females of his race)
He can travel thorught time and through different dimensions, to worlds so bizzare that they consist of sock puppets and other wierd stuff. Sex for Discord could be as familiar to him as camels to tribesmen living on the North Pole, maybe heard about it but were never curious to bother learning. After all there are infinite amount of chaotic activities he can do. As opposed to human and ponies he doesn't need to be driven by the need of food, drink and sex as they are important to someone who age and die.

6093274

EVERYONE seems clueless about sex in this story, and that's fine with me because it means more comedy. :D

Rather than shirking away, she returned another moan to his growl. Discord traveled his tongue to her ear and stuck his lips in her ear. “I’m going to tear you apart and fill you to the brim,” he breathed, attempting dirty talk. It worked with Baast.
Fluttershy’s look of ecstasy vanished and her eyes shot open. She looked at him suspiciously. “What did you just say to me?” she demanded between pants.
Discord sweated nervously. Right. Baast is not the same as Fluttershy. No one could be the same as Fluttershy. He growled in response and bit her again in the neck, being careful not to break her delicate skin. He smiled in success as this seemed to distract her from his failed attempt and he made sure to file this attempt in the “Do Not Try” list.

But er...regarding Baast, at least in this story...that...wasn't just flirting.

6093293
yeah i know in this story they went further but i meant Discord overall in canon

6093241
Not really likely. In the course of human history same sex couples have always existed. Some societies demonized them, some societies held them up as a gold standard, and in some societies they were just there. The idea that it would work differently for ponies doesn't make sense. More likely, Discord previously had no interest in pony sexual habits, and if he's not gay or bi himself, then his self-centeredness might lead him to never notice any pairings except whatever he was doing with whatever female he was sleeping with.

YES! Finally another chapter :yay:

“...Same team?!”
“...Same team!!”

Haha nice!

Brilliantly written. I'm looking forward to the next chapter very much.

6093393

You guys do a way better explaining than I do. :D

6093393 Yes, but Discord ruled torturing and tormenting the ponies, so really there's a decent chance there were just not that many couples at all. One simply seemed obvious, the other had never really occurred to him.

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