Friendship Is Magic!
Shipping Battle, 735 hrs
“All hooves on deck!”
“Medics!”
“Port cannons fire!”
“Starboard cannons fire!”
“My leg!”
“Yar har har!”
“Enough with the crappy pirate talk!”
*raspberry noise*
“You’re not even doing that right!”
“Screw you!”
Back and forth the ships exchanged both cannonfire and banter, never letting up for a second with either. Every ship’s hull was riddled with holes made by cannonballs, to which it was a wonder their structural integrity was still sound. Some cannonballs were fired multiple times, retrieved by the crews of ships they hit for use in their own cannons. Because of this, lack of ammunition was a non-issue for everypony, meaning the battle could last indefinitely until every ship was sunk.
And, at the rate it was going, that would turn out to be the case.
“Take this!” a Sparity crewmate yelled as she fired a cannon at the SpikeDash’s hull. The iron projectile struck true, smashing through one side and eventually exiting out the other, scattering wood-chippings everywhere in the water.
“Why you little!” the SpikeDash captain seethed. She was about to order her crew to concentrate all of its efforts on the Sparity when her ship was struck yet again in the stern, knocking her onto her barrel.
“It’s not just your cannons which are pathetic,” the RainbowPie captain said from behind a still smoking cannon. “Your ship is sloppily construed and yet you force it beyond acceptable limits.”
The RainbowPie crew giggled while the SpikeDash captain fumed. “Oh, you think we’re forced, huh?” she sarcastically asked, letting a smirk grace her lips. She turned to her own crew and shouted, “Use the hooks!”
A collective cheer erupted from her crewmates as they ceased firing cannonballs at surrounding ships and began amassing around the cannons facing toward the RainbowPie, whose captain only looked on in confusion and curiosity. The SpikeDash crew began loading special cannonballs attached to lengths of chain into the cannons. They then began aiming the cannons just slightly above the hull, straight at the deck’s railing.
“All hooves brace for impact!” the RainbowPie commanded, to which her crew complied and ducked with their hooves covering their heads.
“Fire!” the SpikeDash captain yelled.
As one, every single one of their loaded cannons fired straight at the RainbowPie, each load connecting head on with resounding crashes. Unlike typical cannonballs, however, they opened up into a flower-petal shape and anchored themselves against the RainbowPie’s railing.
“So, what’re ya gonna do now, huh!?” the SpikeDash captain shouted to the RainbowPie crew as they stood back up.
The RainbowPie captain took a few moments to inspect the damage done to her railing. Finding it to be nothing crippling, she turned to the other ship and replied with, “Your crazy if you think a few punctures in my railing is gonna sink this ship.”
“Indeed it won’t,” the SpikeDash captain replied with a smirk. “As long as our ship remains afloat, at least.”
“What’re you-” the RainbowPie captain stopped short upon realizing her enemy’s goal to bring the RainbowPie down along with the SpikeDash in case the latter sunk. “I want those cannonballs dislodged from my railing, pronto!”
The RainbowPie crew obeyed their captain’s order and began working to dislodge the chain-rope cannonballs from the ship’s railing.
“You’ll never tear us apart!” the SpikeDash captain declared, a manic grin splitting her features.
Meanwhile, the Dislestia captain watched the whole exchange through her spyglass. Despite not being able to hear the back and forth banter between the two warring captains, she could easily deduce the SpikeDash’s plan by looking at the cannonball chains.
“First mate!” she called.
“Yes, captain princess!?” said pony replied as she trotted up to her, ducking to avoid a few cannonballs along the way.
“What’s the status of my little baby?” the captain asked, subconsciously stroking a hoof along the ship’s railing. “Will she remain afloat long enough for us to win?”
The other mare pursed her lips before sighing and hanging her head. “I’m afraid not, your highness,” she replied. “Our rudder is battered beyond use, the portside hull is about ready to fall apart, and the main mast is-”
“Timber!”
*CRASH*
“. . . -out of commission.”
The Dislestia captain nodded her head in understanding. “Then we have no choice,” she said. “In order to ensure our success, we must also resort to playing dirty.”
Her first mate’s eyes widened. “You mean-?”
“Yes, release the O.T.P.”
The first mate gulped. “But your highness, what if-”
“Don’t you dare question me!” the captain screamed. She turned to the first mate, her eyes burning with rage. “I am your princess, and you will obey me!”
“Y-yes, ma’am,” the other mare said shakily, and hurried off to inform the crew of their new order.
The captain turned to look at all the conflict spread out over the bay with a predatory smile. “Soon you will all bow down to me, my subjects, for I am the princess of shipping!”
By this point, every single ship was close to falling apart from all the damage dealt by cannonballs. Wood chippings littered the water’s surface, some big enough to be used as makeshift rafts. Many of the ships had lost the ability to sail since their masts were either compromised or outright destroyed, making them sitting ducks to others. And yet, throughout all the destruction and conflict, the ships’ crews refused to surrender.
So distracted in their fighting, was everyone, that they failed to notice the behemoth-sized object approaching from the bay’s mouth.
“You call that a ship!?” the Rariburn captain called to the Sparity. “Your cannons are all on one side!”
“You don’t even have any cannons period!” was the response.
“And you don’t have any where it matters now!” the SpikeBelle captain declared, positioning the ship to strike the Sparity with a crippling blow at its cannonless portside.
“Oh crap,” the Sparity captain muttered. She was about to give the order to retreat and reposition their ship, but remembered that their main mast was destroyed. Regardless, she could see the SpikeBelle was too close now for them to retreat in time.
With a sigh, the Sparity captain gave the signal for her crew to cease what they were doing and join her on the main deck. They complied, huddling together and staring at the offending ship as its own crew prepped a cannon to fire upon them, bravely facing the end with their comrades.
They saw the SpikeBelle’s crew finish prepping the cannon and, with tears in their eyes, gripped each other as tight as they could, intending to stay together even after their ship sunk.
The SpikeBelle’s captain smirked. “Ready . . .”
The cannon was aimed at the Sparity’s lower hull, just above the waterline.
“Set . . .”
The Sparity’s crew gripped each other even tighter, a few of them even wetting themselves out of fear.
“FIRE!”
It wasn’t the SpikeBelle captain who gave the order. A colorless ball of light shot through the SpikeBelle’s stern, easily tearing through all the way to the bow and utterly destroying the ship’s already heavily compromised hull. The ship’s crew let out a collective scream as their beloved ship fell to pieces and they plummeted into the water below.
The Sparity captain blinked. “Wha-?”
“Don’t let up!”
The Sparity’s crew quickly found themselves joining the SpikeBelle’s crew in the water as their ship was also ripped clean through and annihilated. The Sparity captain quickly broke the water’s surface with a gasp and looked around to find her crewmates were all alright.
“What happened!?” somepony shouted from the SpikeBelle's crew just a few yards away.
Before anything could be said in reply, more colorless projectiles shot by over their heads, heading directly toward the rest of the battle. One by one, every single battling ship was struck by these unusual cannonballs, to which they suffered the exact same fates as the Sparity and SpikeBelle. Whereas the largest shipping battle Equestria had ever seen was occurring just a few seconds previous, now the air was quiet and empty. The crews and wreckage of every ship littered the water, some of the ponies less adept at swimming using the floating wood pieces as makeshift life rafts.
“I demand an explanation for all of this!” shouted a voice from the east, one which everypony in the water instantly recognized, and feared.
As one, all hundred-something ponies turned to behold the sight of what could only be described as a behemoth of a ship, slowly sailing through the water towards them. The main body of the ship was designed much like the Fluttercord and the Dislestia, with the addition of a figurehead shaped like a sea pony variant of Discord. The coloration of its sails was comprised of eight distinct colors in a stripe pattern: lavender, brown, green, purple, butterscotch yellow, cyan blue, magenta, and orange. Its flag had six symbols circled around a dragon skull and crossbones motif, all of which were a color represented on the flag: a lavender star, an orange apple, a cyan lightning bolt, a yellow butterfly, a magenta balloon, and a purple diamond. Printed upon the side was the ship’s name: Friendship.
What drew everypony’s attention, however, was the pissed off faces of Princess Twilight Sparkle and her friends staring down at them over the ship’s railing. Like the ship captains in the water, they were all dressed in colorful pirate garb consisting of a rainbow tri-cornered hat, coats which complimented their respective fur color, and at least one of either an eyepatch, peg leg, fake parrot, or scruffy beard. Twilight was the only one who wore all of them, and she took a moment to scratch at her beard before speaking again.
“Well?”
Everypony would’ve shrank under her intense glare and stern tone, but being in the water made doing so while staying afloat difficult. It was the Twilestia captain who eventually mustered up the courage to reply to the ticked off princess.
“We were merely playing, your highness.”
The mare’s crew could only deadpan in response, while her fellow captains would’ve swam over and slapped her upside the head had they not been intimidated by Princess Twilight’s presence.
“PLAYING!?” Applejack shouted, stomping her hoof. “Y’all almost decapitated Rainbow Dash with one of yer stray cannonballs! Don’t think ya can weasel yer way outta this with foalish excuses like that!”
“I’m pretty sure I wouldn’t have been decapitated, AJ,” Rainbow whispered to the irate farmer, only to be silenced by a glare from her. “But yeah, I could’ve been horribly injured because of your recklessness!”
“As opposed to being horribly injured by your own recklessness,” Spike snarked, only to also be silenced by Rainbow’s own glare.
“I believe I speak for everypony here when I say what you ruffians were doing does not equate to ‘playing’,” Rarity said, eyeing the crowd below with a disapproving gaze.
“We were fighting to see whose cannons were the strongest!” shouted the CheeriMac captain. “And we would’ve won for sure had you not barged in!”
“As if,” the Fluttercord captain said, and smirked. “Your cannons are only on loan, anyway.”
“Why should that matter!?”
“It matters because they aren’t even yours!”
“At least they’re strong, unlike yours!”
“Why you little-”
“ENOUGH!”
The bickering captains immediately ceased in response to Twilight’s exclamation and turned to look back up at her and her friends.
“All this fighting over whose cannons are stronger is completely pointless!” Twilight continued. “And no, pride and bragging rights aren’t valid reasons!”
“You all should be ashamed of yourselves!” Fluttershy practically screeched.
Everypony in the water flinched at the butterscotch pegasus’ sudden outburst before looking crestfallen.
“She’s right,” one of the TwiDash crewmates said, turning to her captain. “There’s a lot we could learn from the other captains about improving our ship's stature.”
“I agree,” the SpikeBelle captain said. “Our ship, beautiful as it was, could've used many improvements.”
“I agree wholeheartedly!”
“Me too!”
“Me three!”
“Yelling is fun!”
“Arrr!”
“Let’s put our differences aside and work towards a common goal,” the DaringBlood captain proposed.
“And what would that be?” the TwiShy captain asked.
“Using the wrecked pieces of our ships to build an even better one, of course!”
“I like that idea!”
“Me too!”
“Me three!”
“Woohoo!”
“Yar har har!”
Twilight and her friends looked down upon the crowds of ponies in satisfaction. Whereas before they were engaged in a pointless battle of ships, now they were joining together as friends.
“Um, Princess Twilight?”
Said alicorn and her friends looked down to see the Dislestia captain approaching the Friendship’s hull, a nervous expression on her face.
“Odd that she looks exactly like me,” Rarity mused.
“It sure is,” Twilight whispered to her before raising her voice to address the captain. “Is something the matter, miss?”
The mare fidgeted and said, “Well, your highness, my crew and I kinda sorta released the O.T.P to help us win the battle.”
Twilight frowned. “What’s the O.T.P?”
“Uh, Twilight?” Spike squeaked out, tapping the mare’s shoulder.
Twilight turned to see her number one assistant pointing behind them, his face one of sheer terror. Twilight looked to where he was pointing, only for her eyes to shrink to pinpricks in response to what she saw. Her friends followed suit, and reacted accordingly upon seeing what was, undeniably, the O.T.P.
“We’re gonna need a bigger ship,” Pinkie croaked.
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- Excy · 1k words · 67 3 · 4k views
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I don't even want to know. *Laughs and applauds* Bravo.
PLEASE TELL ME WHAT THE OTP STANDS FOR AND WHAT IT IS. I AM SO CURIOUS.
4896466 It's whatever you want it to be.
With a boiling of bubbles off of Horseshoe cove a black mass floated to the surface , A lone figure poped out of a hatch and with a canterlot voice anounced 'Warning this is the SSN Hasbro all actions will end at thirteen hunderd hours zulu time"
Or what?
Oh poopie!
Duh What?
Oh Dear
Oh NO
Oh Oh
Make me!
This is the SSN Hasbro . . . .All hands launch the C&D orders.
That's some funny stuff,
4896466
One True Pairing, if you want the actual meaning. And there is no right answer to what that is.