Xx-Sniper_Masters-xX
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Saw theme song - Hello Zepp. Play it on repeat.
I like this.
The first chapter makes little sense. I know it's the Venus Fly Trap from Saw II and I would normally suggest that something like this not be effectively the same scene as in the movie. Where this fails is the execution and above all the reason for everything.
Jigsaw didn't just kill people with traps, he designed them specifically for the person, or in this case pony, in question. The Venus Fly Trap was set for a person who was a police informant. In other words a person who used his eyes specifically to spy on others. In your story you simply have the same trap put on Trixie and she's told it's because she's a bad pony. The punishment doesn't have the same impact.
Then we have the second problem. She's a unicorn and could use her magic to disable or even destroy the trap in question. Meaning this whole scene and her refusal to do anything is pointless.
I'm going to assume that Pinkie Pie, possibly in Pinkamena form, is the one behind all this. An interesting twist would be for her to show up dead later and it be shown that she's been dead for weeks thus meaning that another pony is actually responsible for all these murders.
3238355 I know I know... It's just that my brain is so messed up in many ways. Honestly I never watched the whole ENTIRE Saw franchise. Only the 6th and 7th one. So I need to constantly go to youtube to know what to do and shit. And this story will not be deleted for one specific reason. I'm that type of brony that likes DEATH. So it shall not be deleted. Not unless if it gets like 50 dislikes
But I doubt that will happen. Wait a second where am I going with this? Ah forget it. I'm keep it no matter what.
3238355 Oh one more thing... No I don't wanna spoil it. (It's probably already spoiled)
3238382
Did I say you should delete it? Did I mention at any point that you shouldn't write about death?
I pointed out a major flaw with your story. I didn't bother with the second chapter although you have some major problems there with your characterizations and possibly spelling / grammar but I will admit to skimming through it because it wasn't enough to hold my interest.
Do whatever you want with this. Chances are you're going to get a lot more thumbs down on this than you might want.
3238397 Meh I don't really care. I just type in what comes into mind.
I like it
3240495 O_o The story starts with 8 dislikes and barely any likes... but in the end there are more likes than dislikes? LADY LUCK IS ON MY SIDE TODAY!
3241100
Well I like it. I'm waiting for more
3241110 here da link to theme song. Open it in new tab.
Saw Theme Song - Hello Zepp
Okay now looking back... I made a mistake there was supposed to be 7 players not 8. I guess the ending will have to be changed a bit... :/
This is good stuff!! Can't wait for more
3287021
3241110 Well it's cancelled :/ But I have made the ending so you wouldn't be left hanging. Go to my user page and there will be a hunk of words on this one blog called 'SPOILER ALERT!'
K? Good.
3238355
For me, it seems like he put Trixie due to she's like Bobby from Saw 3D (they both falsely states about something and soon profited by it) and yeah, partly agrees with you. The trap need to be something about her mouth not her eye.
That's amazing! Trixie is choosen very well for this! Good Job!
I want to play a game...........
I hope this is continued some day.