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E

You ended up in Equestria about two years ago, and in that time, you've become quite close with a number of ponies. Of them, Rarity in particular has left a major impression on you. She seems to enjoy having you around, and you appreciate the company.

That said, there is one major roadblock getting in the way of your relationship. More than anypony you know, Rarity is extremely concerned with keeping up appearances. As a fashion designer and all-around fabulous mare, she frequently wants your opinion on how she looks.

Unfortunately for you, you're a human with no way of telling what makes a pony "beautiful."

Chapters (1)
E

You've been waiting all month for this. A day off. A trip to your secret spot in the Everfree Forest. Nothing but you, the fish, and your cider. Truly, there is nothing more you could ask for.

So why do Twilight and friends have to bother you so much?!

Chapters (1)
E

It's been a while since you've had a proper day off. No work, no responsibilities, none of it. So, you're going to make the most of it by doing absolutely nothing. Your hammock is set up, your cooler is nice and full, and the shade underneath these Ponyville oak trees feels quite heavenly. Yup, it's going to be a good day.

Twilight, on the other hand, doesn't understand why you would want to do something so... mundane.

Chapters (1)
E

Princess Twilight Sparkle just made the awful mistake of accidentally giving you the ability to act consequence-free for a short span of time. You intend to make the most of it, but your friends aren't about to let you get away with it.

Uh, what is it you're trying to do, exactly?

Chapters (1)
E

When you woke up one morning, you weren't expecting to be greeted by candy-colored ponies ruled by a tyrant named Nightmare Moon. You also weren't expecting her to take such a liking to you. She's a bit cruel to her subjects, but you admittedly don't mind the preferential treatment she gives you. So... maybe you like her back?

Perhaps love is the one thing she's been missing.

Chapters (1)
E

In a secret underground room near the back of Canterlot Castle, a super important meeting is being held. With figures like Princess Twilight Sparkle, Dragon Lord Ember, Queen Novo, and the now-retired Celestia all in attendance, what could have caused such a tense, dangerous meeting to take place?

And why do you have to be caught in the middle of it?!

Chapters (1)
E

Following a territorial dispute over a few islands along Equestria's coast, a rogue army of kelpies has been threatening Equestria's border. Princess Celestia would like to resolve the situation peacefully, but even after making as many concessions as possible, the kelpies seem intent on taking more and more.

Meanwhile, Anon has an idea.

Chapters (1)
T

This story is a sequel to Anon is Incarcerated Due to His Involvement in the Transportation of Crack Cocaine


AIDHITCC (Anon is Incinerated Due to His Involvement in the Transportation of Crack Cocaine) is the direct sequel to the critically acclaimed AIDHITCC (Anon is Incarcerated Due to His Involvement in the Transportation of Crack Cocaine.)

The current story follows Anon, an immensely powerful creature who has recently been captured by Princess Celestia for his transgressions against pony kind. Usually he is not one to be caught with his pants down, however, his greatest weakness had been exploited at the most inopportune time and now he finds himself at the mercy of the pony leader.

‘What is his greatest weakness?’ You may ask?

Well, I’m glad you’re so curious!

It’s off screen plot convenience.


(Some readers may be disturbed. This is a very serious fanfiction for very serious fanfictioneers. Rated 7/10 by Steve Jobs, who is quoted as saying: “A piece of literature so good, It motivated me to come back to life and get cancer again before dying a second time.”)

Also plz be nic3 firs stry on this site thx ☺️

Shout out to God, my proof reader. And shout out to Lowe’s for sponsoring this story. Perform the Dougie at your local empty Lowe’s parking lot (only redeemable during midnight) to increase the price of your next transaction by 30%. Thank you once again to Lowe’s for sponsoring this story.

WARNING: BY READING THIS MESSAGE YOU AGREE TO THE TERMS AND CONDITIONS. Which means you need to PayPal me money. If you don’t have money, mail yourself to my multimillion shekel mansion and I guess I’ll make due.

Please send thoughts and prays as I’m kinda in a bad place right now. Not mentally, I just live in Canada.

Chapters (1)
T

Anon’s found himself in hot water, and a courtroom. Why is he in a courtroom? Oh, no major reason I can assure you!

Just the transportation of 152,870 pounds of crack cocaine.

Chapters (1)
T

This story is a sequel to Anon’s A Villain Because Of A Bet


Anon was doing great in retirement, but then aliens come along and they’re definitely sure he’s still evil. Oh well, what’s one more rodeo?

Well, not that simple. This time, our villain Anon will have to prove he’s the most villainous of villains in order to take on these new challengers. And how do we determine a villain’s prowess? With a competition of course!

Chapters (5)