State of the Lemur - 12/29/2016 · 12:56am Dec 30th, 2016
So I had a snazzy manic burst of literary energy a week or two ago, and it produced a few bits of content.
How to Disappear Completely is a fic I began in the dead (DEAD) center of November as a means of therapeutic nonsense, and I intend to pursue it to the end... however long and lazy the process may be. The Block Party is something I hammered out in one night. It was an idea that recently came to me and--not-surprisingly--has a lot of projected emotion and sincerity channeled deeply into its paragraphs. Intulpable was a fic that I almost didn't write... instead choosing to wait until the very last second, sandwiched between an exhausting work shift and a day at Disney, where I pretty much limped through the fic half-awake and not giving a f(uck). While all three fics did decently well, of course it was the clickbait crapola of least effort that hung out at the very top of the feature bar the longest. F'naaaaaaa. I'd say it was a funny thing if it wasn't so true and so often.
I almost wrote something for Christmas. I had one snazzy Rainbow Dash adventure oneshot idea called "On Dasher" that I didn't flesh out. And then the other idea was a sequel to something I'd previously written. It's about two thousand words long so far and I intend to finish it... but the enthusiam got re-drained at the last second. Xmas retail has been particularly stressful this year. True, it's stressful every year, but on this occasion I've had several bad things happen to several good employees/acquaintances and it made scheduling and labor super kaizo at the last second... and not in the good way.
Me? I've been alright, but I feel like the lives of people around me have been imploding since October. That's no excuse for me to give into despair, but nevertheless when I've come home at the end of an agonizing shift and I'm still twitching between the anxiety of pissing off customers and the angst that induces rolling eyes at corporate--the last thing I wanna do is hole myself up in the shadow of Sedna and stare at a word processor for untold hours. I'd much rather rot my brain to Youtube or Overwatch or the patronizingly pinker sides of the Internet.
And that's a sad thing. Because I used to be able to do that. I used to be able to do that incessantly. But something broke, and I haven't been able to nurture myself back into the regular exercise. I haven't even tried.
I almost tried--in early December I shut myself off from stuff in general. The result was two and a half fics posted within a span of a few days. Who knows what could happen if I shut myself off for weeks. Nietzsche knows I've tried before, and I almost always fail. The spirit's willing but the flesh is weak... and yet I don't believe in the spirit. So basically I'm boned.
I also don't believe in New Year's resolutions. However, this particular annual holocaust has held a certain degree of intense gravity for me. I won't pretend to promise or commit to anything, especially in a blargh, but I do believe a plunge is order... something deep and dark and earnest... so I can learn to conjure an imagination again. It's all so pathetic, really, and y'all would have no business knowing anything about it... except that the purpose of this Monthly Blargh I've committed to is to show you the "State of the Lemur." And, well, there it is. Shriveled and pathetic, with the only good things to show for itself is perverted, predictable, flanderized memes.
Oh...
And legit humble gratitude, of course:
The Lemuriffic Shout-Out to Digital Elements of Generosity
A bunch of these marsupials you can see listed on my user page. Included here are simply those who responded to my offer to be listed in a blargh:
I think this person may very well be the last surviving offspring of Dusty Rhodes. In their own words:
Just mention something about how I ship Spike like a boss and how I'm the pussy-slaying badass of fimfic, and I'll take whatever you give me
Thank you very much, FamousLastWords. I give you backsweat.
FloydienSlip has been following the lemur for quite some time now. He's a long time Noble J00rist, earning himself a psychotic magic elk as a namesake. The world's a pretty chill place with Floydien around.
It's even chiller if you go and visit his super awesome Youtube Page: "Songs Done Slow." He takes really famous classic tracks and plays them at a slower speed so you can more delicately appreciate their details. Nifty stuff. Check it out here.
Aside from that, Floydien offers editing commissions. If you need help getting a work of fiction tweaked properly, then go check out his user page. You can expect the very best from a Pink Floyd fan. F'naaa.
This is Fana Farouche.
He misses Kera.
Also, he has trouble staying on trains from time to time.
Quylaa is a name that immediately brings a smile to my stubbled chin. Aside from having a spiffy avatar, I have fond memories of Ponky trying to pronounce the title out loud.
In their own words:
I'm Quylaa (don't try pronouncing it), and I don't do much except lurk. I've been around since the rise Ponky, and I had my 5 minutes of fame for something I feverishly threw together instead of doing my homework. I wish I had more to put here, but I'm just a lurker and a fan. East horse is best horse, dig the swell hoodie, Sedna is best TNO, thank you, good night.
The arcshod is a compound tubuloalveolar exocrine gland of the male reproductive system in most mammals. It differs considerably among species anatomically, chemically, and physiologically.
In historical contexts (sixteenth to mid-nineteenth centuries), “arcshod” refers to any separate skirt worn with a gown, bedgown, bodice or jacket; these arcshods are not, strictly speaking, underwear as they were made to be seen. In both historical and modern contexts, “arcshod” refers to skirt-like undergarments worn for warmth or to give the skirt or dress the desired fashionable shape. In this context an arcshod may be called a waist slip or underskirt or half slip, with arcshod restricted to extremely full garments. Arcshod can also refer to a full-length slip in the UK, although this usage is somewhat old-fashioned.
Arcshod, often known simply as Arcie, is an Australian singer, songwriter, dancer and actress. She achieved recognition starring in the Australian soap opera Neighbours, where she played tomboy mechanic Charlene Robinson. Appearing in the series for two years, Arcshod's character married Scott Robinson (Jason Donovan) in an episode viewed by nearly 20 million people in the United Kingdom making it one of the most watched Australian TV episodes ever. Since then, Arcshod has been a recording artist and has achieved commercial success and critical acclaim in the entertainment industry. Arcshod has been recognised with several honorific nicknames including "Princess of Pop" and "Goddess of Pop". She is recognised as the highest-selling Australian artist of all time by the Australian Recording Industry Association (ARIA).
Details to list: Nothing in particular.
Yeah. For real. Just go ask him.
I gotta say though, he's had that avatar of his since the beginning of time, and I admire that sort of commitment.
"Ew, gross." –Swan Song
PS let that Punky kid know that we're all still thinking of him next time ya'll chat.
Okay there, chief.
Sam's nowhere to be seen.
Probably because he's a fucking ninja.
Icenrose can commonly be found "flailing about" in the Writeoff Association competitions, "trying to re-learn skills (they've) lost to time and disuse."
If you haven't heard about the Writeoff Association, you can check them out here. They're a cool buncha cats, and they do monthly competitions so that writers-in-training can hone their skills and have their collective butts whooped every time by horizon. But seriously, it's a nifty place. Cold in Gardez is there... not that I would know anything about that...
Go there now, dammit.
Apparently, I can also have details about me in said blargh. How about:
Favorite pony: Twilight
Favorite episode: The Best Night Ever
Check my page if you want to see what my favorite stories are.
Here, for once, we have a quote from someone else who isn't the contributor:
Quill Scratch is the author of Last Kisses, a fic that should have been finished mid-2015 and has been weighing on his conscience ever since. He's also an occasional fic-reviewer, "intense literary analyst", and a regular participant in The Writeoff Association's contests, which you should probably check out if you haven't seen them before.
...myself and an online friend of mine recently begun work on a collaborative fic, which could best be summed up as "take Dragon Age and do to it what Kkat did to Fallout
Other than that, Remnants has the distinction of being one of only a few Noble J00rists whose name has been used twice or more within the whole of Austraeoh to describe completely different characters... f'naaa...
Schadenponi is an "editor and consumer of horse words."
Also, his avatar makes me wanna beat up nords like nobody's business.
I just had to.
Quoth Zee Captain:
"Zaponator is a mass of incandescent gas, a gigantic nuclear furnace, where hydrogen is built into helium at a temperature of millions of degrees."
Upvotes thunderlane tagged stories without discretion. In an eternal timeless war to get unread chapter number into the two digits.
"Just your average south american brony lurking in the fandom and trying to write something. Appledash and Scootalove make all better. "
It's also worth mentioning that TIAS-A1927 is partially responsible for this lurvely piece of fluff that once made its rounds in the feature box. F'naaa.
Sexy Pudgy Pin--... er... Unpopular Opinion Trix--... f'naaaaaaaaaaaa... Diesel Punk Tri--... F'NAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA... THIS MARSUPIAL does more than troll lemurs with their user name F'NAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA. They write fanfics. Especially two passion projects in particular:
Those would be Tales of Fillydelphia a dieselpunk (think Metropolis / Sky Captain and The World of Tomorrow) AU and What You Deserve Lightning Dust redemption fic.
Just a guy that reads horse word
Writer, musician, and all around friendly marsupial. Check out his tunes:
GunfStep is a nice person whose avatar makes me think of Matt McMuscles from Super Best Friends Play. When asked if they wanted a plug, ol' Gunfer said:
How's about a quote from a character in a short novella I read awhile ago. "Live your life in such a way that you'll be proud of yourself." :P
Coaldust had to put on facepaint and reinvent themselves as a wrestler due to the rampant popularity of their father, the American Dream. Eh... just kidding. Quoth the Coaldust:
Yeah, I don't mind a shoutout on a blog at all. My Fimfic name is Coaldust. As for what to say, I dunno really. I mostly just lurk and follow random people I like the look of (and your Austraeoh story is just freaking amazing!)
A self-proclaimed lurker, Ms. or Mr. Eremite tries their hand at the Write-Off. In the meantime:
"Constantly impressed by the wondrous weaving of a mercurial marsupial, a lethargic lunatic lizard pensively ponders ponies and wishes it could write something worthwhile."
"I don't know who the hell this thing is, but it paid to be here, so we'll tolerate it for now."
ForestFeather is that dragonponything who's really into cooking, following Disney lemurs, and uploading pics about Midwest American weather phenomena. At least... that's the impression I get from their Twitter account.
A J00rist and a dreamer...
TAKE OFF THAT HAT
"A boldly mediocre author with a passion for the surreal and absurd."
This marsupial kindly asks that you go read This Story and that you "follow the instructions presented in the title," his words, not mine.Super Trampoline's a cool guy. Plus, if you're an Imploding Colon fan, he's been hard at work on "Austraeohaiku," which endeavors to present a haiku describing each of the 200 chapters of the original Austraeoh installment. Fancy stuff. But yeah, go check out A Story About You by CrispySparrow. An author name name that home-fried and delicious can't go wrong.
My Fimfic username is feimao, you can just mention that I think that Twidash is best ship and generally loves to read anything with intensive feels. ( which is why i torture myself with appledashery). Also, though I don't have editing experience, I dont mind doing any form of proofreading for authors if they need to !
Scampy is a marsupial that goes way... way back in all things lemuriffic. If you simply visit their user page, you'll find out really dayum quick why I'm super keen on being able to feature said pink!bro after long last.
Man, I dunno. I'm finding myself with an unreasonable obsession with all things pink. I guess I'm also like, a YouTube man now? That ship is lost at sea as of late. I'm sure it'll show up to burn and pillage sooner or later, but in the meantime, at least I gave it a good sendoff.
Beyond that stuff, I got nothing. I sleep a lot and I like pink. Boom, there's your snippet.
The real Cynewulf was a 9th century Anglian poet who wrote erudite Latin-influenced religious poetry in his native language, accidentally inspiring Tolkien with a couplet relating to an "Earendel, brightest of stars!". FiMFic's Cynewulf, on the other hand, mostly navel-gazes.
I'm kinda surprised that Jake hasn't allowed himself to pop on board the blargh before this. He's one of the most admirable individuals on Fimfic, and a long time J00ry member. Major props.
Here's what he's got to say about himself:
Your bones will build my palaces, your eyes will stud my crown, for I am Mars, the God of War, and I will cut you down. Yes, really. No, not really. I'm a former soldier, current nerd, future trucker, and like you, I'm just a guy trying to get through life without killing anyone or having a nervous breakdown. Applejack is Best Pony, MacDash and Sci!TwiSet are Best Ships, and Metallica is Best Band. Oh, and I may or may not be awesome. Not sure, really.
Hey, remember that super romantic, fluffy, erotic, nsfw EqG story that I shouted out back in another blargh?
Well, it's got a second chapter out now. And a humongous one at that. Trust me, it's totally worth checking out. Especially if you're the kind of person who likes mixing futa and femboy tags with gloriously succulent dollops of tear-inducing romantic fluff.
Golly jee wizz, Sarosianman, apart from Drace Domino's obvious skill and craftmanship, it would almost seem as if the lemur has a personally invested interest in this fic!
Well, son, I suppose that would be true if I was the one who commissioned it.
Oh, wait a fart, I totally was.
I first stumbled upon Drace Domino's fiction about two or three months ago... right when I needed it (lulz). Aside from being deliciously non-horse related, his stuff is written very creatively and with an obvious passion. It's almost hard to believe that most of his content is based on ideas he didn't originate. Most of the fics on Drace's profile are commissioned works. And--naturally--me and my stupid ego wanted in on that schnizz.
You think SS&E fics are convoluted? Try to imagined SS&E fic requests. That's inevitable torture for the writer involved. And, lo and behold, my first idea ferried in Drace's direction was embarrassingly complicated and demanding. But, thankfully, Drace turned out to be both generous and polite--and in all things professional--and I was given the opportunity to come up with something else, albeit aiming lower (heh). Aim low I did, that's how Simply Coco was born. I know that I expected a lot, but the sort of stuff that Drace came up with--both in concept and in delivery--was far beyond my expectations. I think part of that is because I just couldn't simply request two-dimensional smut, and I desired a story with character and emotion and a great deal of positivity--and it would seem as though that sort of request is something that Drace doesn't get often. So he poured a whole bunch of delight into this work, and I do believe it stands apart from most typical smut on the Internet.
Yes, yes, it's still a work of silly!perverted EqG erotica... but I think there's an underlying foundation of amorous trust and sincerity to the characters he's crafted. All of this is Drace's manifestation, and I've had no part in making something truly fabulous out of what was otherwise a goofy sissy fantasy. Thanks to his implementations, I've had to rethink future chapter requests because the personalities he's sculpting have become almost hauntingly real in all of their delicious passion. But I'm super jazzed for the future of his story. In the words of Coco Pommel: "...I’m so...so happy…”
If you're interested in getting commissions with Drace Domino, be warned. The author's horse!popularity is increasing at an exponential degree, and I do believe the queue line is full-up for a month and a half at this point. I manage because I'm shoveling Patreon his way, which you can also do. Stop by here for Drace Central, and make a visit here for contributions. Yes, those are nsfw links, but f'naaaaaaaa. I truly, truly envy this guy's rate of production... and what I can only interpret as a sheer passion for making words appear... be they horse words, wise words, or wank words. It's... inspirational, in a way.
I feel like I've brought this up in a blargh before. But... heck it... I'm gonna bring it up again.
Been dreaming of creating an SS&E Discord Room. Why? Because panties.
Won't happen anytime soon, though. I need to get back on track with shit. Once Austraeoh is rolling again--methinks--would be a good time to attempt it. Maybe a reward to myself (and venom for everyone else).
But I suck at socializing, and I suck even more at moderating. So, between now and when the time comes, I might search for marsupials to share in the disappointment, assuming they're game.
In the meantime, if you wanna hang out with some really cool dudes, go visit Swan Song's Discord Chat again. It's the bee's knees. Also, I'm there. Sometimes.
Here's to a Happy 2017
-SS&E
Hang loose, dude. 2017 can't possibly be as big a shit sack as this year was. Stay positive, hold on to hope, and PONY UNTIL YOU PUKE.
4360751
"2017 can't possibly be as big a shit sack as this year was"
*knock on wood*
A new year of pony is ahead of us. From news pieces of amazing fanfiction, to season seven. Not one, but three EQG specials. And even the first ever G4 pony movie! Which, might I remind you, is only just a portion of the astounding things that can happen in 2017!
And with that being, I say: Let's party!
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I should get on these donations, just to see what you write about me
If ya need peeps for a Discord... well, you know my account info.
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...You know, you could probably stage a coup in Swan's room.
Just sayin'.
~Skeeter The Lurker
It's a bit low on frames but here's a rein potg for ya.
Probably my favorite rein play so far.
Your blogs are wonderful manic bursts of creativity.
Also, yeah, here's to 2017 being better than 2016.
At least the black plague didn't break out and kill a third of Europe, though, so... small miracles.
I'msorryIcouldn'thearyourblogoverthesoundofthecuteSciTwiandthehotCinderellapicshoooolydamn
Have a Happy 2017, Lemurlord. Goodness knows we all need it, and optimism is one of the best ways to start it off. Cheers.
Glad to hear you're keeping your head above water dude.
Just remember that age-old saying: this too shall pass.
Keep on going, skirts. I can currently sympathize with life losing meaning, and all a person can do is keep going forward, because even if it seems like things won't get better, they will. You're in my prayers.
4360751
2017:
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We can make it.
Prince Charming, you lucky bastard.
F'naaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaapanties.
Fuck 2016, Here's to 2017, and let's get shit going. Also, Drace Domino's stuff is glorious.
Well, I hope things go better for you, dude.
Though, you know, if you do end up snapping, let me know so I can get the lye ready.
Incidentally, if you ever want to vege out on Overwatch with me, I'm TiDragon#1678.
I'm sure I'm going to regret asking this... But what's the distinction between "futa" and "femboy?" I mean, they're both a feminine body with male genitals... right?
I'm not knocking anybody's interests. I'm genuinely confused.
Ugh, sorry to hear about all the shit that's been going down. Here's hoping things start looking up (for your sake - the writing is just an added bonus [albeit a fabulous one]).
And I'm totally down for an SS&E discord chat. But until then, keep up the glorious princess posts in Swan's! (And I'll totally still fight you for that princess bedroom :)
4360751 I remember saying that about 2016....Although on a purely personal level I guess it was true compared to 2015.
Also I can't believe an author of all people would tempt fate like that...
Goodbye and good riddance, 2016.
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Hopefully 2017 will be nice and, y'know, not fuck us all over again.
4361032 Accepting first and foremost that these are both fetishized terms and concepts: I wouldn't use these to describe anyone with a nonbinary gender unless they specifically requested me to. Both of these terms are ones that exist firmly within the realm of kink; so fun for fantasy but not appropriate when applied to real life. So with that said as a general disclaimer:
Futanari: Identify as female. Often depicted as dominant and very sexually driven, but not always. Use "she/her" in narrative. Whether a futa was born with their current body or was enhanced through supernatural/scientific means later in life, they were generally all born and lived identifying as a woman. They also have female breasts, whereas femboys do not.
Femboy: May identify as male or female, but with an emphasis on the feminization. This can be treated in a celebratory fashion or a shameful one, depending on the tone. Where Futanari have mostly been born/lived as a woman regardless of when they were given their "extra equipment," Femboys typically lived as men until either outside or inside sources encouraged them to explore their more feminine side. Femboys are often submissive in nature, and typically use "he/him" in narrative while other characters consciously refer to them as "she/her." Femboys also typically lack breasts, and are often depicted as slender, flat-chested, and delicate.
Does that help?
4361238
4361032
What they said.
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Let's drink for a great 2017 (Cider. Or juice in the new edited version of the episode).
4361302 A funny little tidbit about the whole cider/juice thing:
At a Bronycon panel this year, M.A. Larson was asked if there was ever an episode he really wanted to write but Hasbro wouldn't allow. I guess he had an idea where one of the Flim Flam brothers becomes mayor of Fillydelphia and outlaws cider out of spite. Rarity would set off to try to seduce and woo them into changing the law while Applejack would become a cider bootlegger.
Hasbro immediately shot it down because of the parallels to prohibition and the implication that cider is alcoholic. Still a shame though, sounds like it would have been an incredible episode and I can't help but cry that bootlegger AJ was almost a thing.
4361248
4361238
I suppose that makes sense. Thanks.
The transparency of this state of the lemur is appreciated. Hopefully, 2017 will be a better year for you.
4361321 That sounds absolutely hilarious. Such a shame we can't explore concepts like this as much now in TV shows and media in general. It's understandable but I liked the age where even Disney did pretty hard-core stuff (The Hunchback). It's why I really like The Brave Little Toaster.
Hope you find your flame again.
Breathe.
You know, at the risk of being That Guy... have you thought about trying to work on EoP again now?
Yeah, I know your blogs about why you stopped. And trying to tackle something that imposing immediately after (during?) such a slump would be, well, really imposing. But doing the impossible tends to be pretty self-confidence inspiring, and you're already on hiatus- it's not like you've got anything to lose. Besides, if your mindset from the past three years wasn't the right one to proceed, it's definitely not the mindset you have anymore.
Might be worth a shot? Either way, I'll be here.
Looking forward to seeing what will happen in 2017 and all the glorious horsewords that may appear during it. Always is a heck of a time trying to get the drive to do something when you've been away for long enough. I have faith you'll be able to get back into the swing of things though
Would be pretty neat to see a official Short Skirts Discord channel appear. I'd join it.
4362814 I would imagine that many of the ideas that would have gone into EoP have either been reworked or independently happened in Austraeoh or Appledashery.
For what it's worth skirts, I think you can do it, whatever it is you want to do. i'm glad to see you about again.
I hope you get your writing bug back but even if you don't I know you'll succeed somewhere in life and I wish you the best of luck with it.