"Wouldn't it be amazing if I could turn into a cat?" Rainbow Dash said. Twilight Sparkle overreacted. Or so most of Ponyville agreed later, among a chorus of meows.

Twilight Sparkle has been poisoned, and only one cure is known: cry the toxins out. She has one week to increase her emotional range, or die.

Easy choice, right?

If only she knew how to do it.

Maud's best friend is dead.

Fluttershy said softly, "You know how your arms are symmetrical? Your left is like your right? I'm not really into that. I think it's gross."

Then it got worse.

In January, my friend Fluttershy accidentally photobombed my video chat with my girlfriend. Now it's just a question of who dumps who first. And who'll be there to pick up the pieces?

Thanks to SquidgeKitten for a helpful preread.

This is an entry for Angel Midnight's "2020 Is So Weird" short story contest, which runs until the end of November.

(The story image is a frame I edited, from an EG music video.)

(Alternate story title: "That Thing on My Girlfriend's Desk")

Starlight Glimmer goes to a mandatory counseling session about suicide.

Also, somepony might be dead by the end of the session. Because it's just that kind of day.

"Time travel?" Sunset Shimmer echoed the words spoken a moment ago by the beautiful, leather-clad redhead sitting in front of her. "THAT'S what I'm supposed to assume?"

_{#sunsetxsunsetshipcontest2021}

"It doesn't count as suicide, if you're wearing a parachute," Wallflower Blush insisted.

Copyright disclaimers: For the same of comic timing, I wrote my own completely independent lyrics and melody for a song that happens to have the same name as a song in our world. Also, the brief Emily Dickinson excerpt really is in the public domain now, having been first published in the 1800s.

This story is a sequel to Naked Behind the Scenes: The Making of Lyra and Bon-Bon's "Prench Art Film"

Wallflower Blush wants to watch Lyra and Bon Bon having lesbian sex.

Will she be disappointed? Probably.

This story should work on its own, but it's ALSO an authorized yet completely unofficial and non-canon sequel to EileenSaysHi's "Prench Art Film" and to "Naked Behind the Scenes: The Making of Lyra and Bon-Bon's 'Prench Art Film.'"