Evacuation
Marco Hernandez awoke with a ZAP as the defibrillation pads on his chest delivered a massive shock to his cardiovascular system.
>>Revival procedure complete.
It took a second for him to open his eyes, which he instantly regretted. Smoke filled his vision, and he barely made it out of his tube before he began heaving sickeningly as he tried, and failed, to stabilize himself by the railings next to his tube. Instead he doubled over and wretched, half-kneeling on the floor, trying desperately to recover.
The first thing that stood out to him was the gravity. He wasn’t in weightlessness, as he had expected to wake up in. Instead, he was being pulled to the floor at what he estimated to be about two thirds of earth’s gravitational pull. The next thing he noticed was just how opaque the air outside his tube was. It was impossible to make out distinct shapes past the crew cabin, and lights were flashing along the walls, guiding the him towards the exits of the ship.
And then it hit him.
They must have crashed, seeing as the ship recognized that the safest place for him to be was outside (hence the guidance lights). The air was filled with smoke, but Marco still opened his eyes to see if his fellow crewmates were awake. 6 of the 7 other tubes were empty, and the last one showed no signs of opening to let its prisoner out. Assuming that the rest had already made it to safety, and wondering why they hadn’t woken the poor guy next to him, Marco manually initiated the defrosting procedure on his crewmate’s tube before fleeing the crew cabin. He would have stayed and helped the kid to safety, but the smoke was clogging his lungs and he could tell that he wouldn’t survive the 20 minutes it would take for the tube to revive him.
Marco’s eyes hurt. That was an understatement. He would have been fine with the heat surrounding him, or the lack of oxygen as the smoke gummed up his lungs. But the pain in his eyes was unbearable. He screamed as he ran, climbing up sideways hallways and opening his eyes to slits so he could follow the pulsing lights that would lead him to an exit. Turning a corner, he spotted a blurry figure wearing a gas mask and completely covered in a yellow hazmat suit.
“Help me! Get me out of here!” He cried, only to realize that the figure wasn’t human. For one, it was extremely short. It barely reached above his waist, and Marco wasn’t a really tall guy. Second, it was distinctly quadrupedal, standing on four latex-covered legs, its head balanced upon a neck far longer than any human’s. Most importantly, the silhouette didn’t react like he had expected it to. Marco had been trained over many years to know that emergency personnel would save anyone, no matter who or what, in any circumstance, no matter how dangerous, as long as there was a small chance that they could make it out alive. Hell, he was an emergency personnel, he knew he would have.
But the figure looked less concerned or helpful than frightened. It backed off a few feet before nervously looking behind it, where Marco spotted a few more of the creatures. To Marco’s horror, however, he noticed that they were holding... Hacksaws, crowbars, and hammers. Fleeing, he dashed toward the exit, opened it with a grunt, and dived out, hitting the floor 20 feet below and dissipating the impact with a forward roll.
Looking back at the burning wreckage, Marco wished his still-trapped crewmate luck before assessing his surroundings. They appeared to have crashed in a forest, although the trees unlucky enough to be in the obvious path of the ship were either smouldering or completely obliterated; charred and splintered wood littered the landscape. The trees surrounding the crash site farther away were bent away from the ship, making it painfully obvious that the vessel had crashed with a massive amount of speed, causing the trees to become partially uprooted with only the kinetic energy dispersed by the ship’s impact.
Looking around, Marco noticed that still more of the quadrupedal creatures that had been inside the craft were surrounding the place; and more worrying still some of them had spotted him and were alerting the others. Marco began to flee into the forest, sprinting for his life as an army of spear-holding possibly-canids chased him, close on his heels. He didn’t make it far, though, before he was tackled to the ground by a winged variant he hadn’t spotted before. Grunting, he threw the creature off of him and began to get up. It was for naught, though, as he was completely surrounded. He stood up, feeling the extra strain his muscles had to exert due to their atrophie, and turned toward the creatures.
Before he could get a word out, however, two more of the flying variant had grabbed him by the arms and lifted him off the ground, carrying him toward a large wooden cart carried by more of the winged things.
Marco screamed, struggling for freedom as he was lifted into the air. He had never been afraid of heights, but the sudden view of the ground rushing away from him was enough to make anyone scared. His thrashings caused the creatures holding him to wobble, before one hit him on the head with the butt of its spear.
Defeated, Marco was dumped into the carriage and instantly secured by a number of wingless creatures, who held him down before a smaller version with a single menacing horn on its head but without the gold linings on its coat, approached him with its horn glowing.
Marco struggled against his captors, but realized he couldn’t move as his limbs slowly became numb.
What’s happening to me? What are these things? Where are we? He thought, as he slowly drifted back into the dark abyss of sleep.
*****
Tough Runner had been working on the ship for a solid 12 minutes. Add that to the time it had taken them to reach the crash site and begin cutting away the ridiculously strong metal that made up the outside the of the ship, and the crash site was around 23 minutes old. He had to hurry if they were going to rescue whatever alien technology lay inside. Or... What if there were actually still aliens inside? He pushed the thought out of his mind. He didn’t want to consider it; the prospect of entering an unknown ship was already terrifying enough.
Finally, the metal yielded, and smoke poured out of the rough hole they had just created. Fastening his gas mask, Runner stepped into the burning ship, looking around him as he did so.
The walls were made entirely of metal, with hanging wires snapping with some sort of magical energy. Motioning to his squadmates that all was clear, he began to explore farther into the depths of the ship. Lights pulsed along the sides, shining through the thick smoke.
Celestia, thought Runner, this is creepy as all Tartarus. Anywhere he could see through the smoke was covered in shadow, lit up occasionally by the strange lights. A minute or so into the expedition, however, he heard something.
As if on cue, a massive creature came running through an adjacent hall, standing on two legs with long, menacing forearms clutching its face. The hair on the back of Runner’s neck stood as the creature stopped and turned toward him. It let out a shrill scream that was greatly muffled by Runner’s mask before turning and running away, leaving the terrified pony looking back at his equally scared squad. Raising his crowbar, he continued down the long shafts, finally coming to a stop in a well-lit room whose walls were lined with massive, vertical glass tubes. Most of them were sealed and empty, but one was opened and another contained what appeared to be a block of ice with some indiscernible object inside of it.
Walking toward the filled tube, Runner was taken aback. Another of the aliens he had seen earlier stood inside, completely unmoving within the ice. As the rest of his squad followed him to the tube, they all stared at the thing before them. It was about twice to three times as tall as any normal pony, with sickeningly jagged joints placed around its body. It had no hair to speak of other than a very short mane on the top of its head, and its skin was an unhealthy white. Its eyes were tiny compared to a pony’s, and its nose and mouth laid completely flat on its face, rather that on a protruding snout. Its forearms were long and thin, ending in flat hoofs with five menacing tentacles each.
Deciding that his mission was more important that personal safety, Runner ordered his teammates to pry the thing out of its cell. Before they could touch the glass, however, the ice began to melt. Slowly at first but then increasing in speed, the crystals turned to liquid and drained away into a grate on the floor, until only the creature remained, standing lifelessly inside the tube. A garbled voice announced something Runner couldn’t make out through his gas mask before a large panel descended from the roof of the tube and placed itself over the creature’s chest.
--ZAP!--
The ponies jumped as the creature arched its back as magical energy flowed through it, snapping its eyes open and screaming. The voice came again, the panel raised itself to the roof, and the door to the tube opened up to the outside world.
Motioning for his squadmates to help, Runner grabbed the creature before it could attack them and restrained it against the floor. One of the unicorns in the group, Mint Dreams, put a sleeping spell on the creature as it laid on the floor, coughing. Picking up the now motionless creature, the group fled the vessel, practically diving out of their exit hole before handing the creature to a group of pegasi.
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Are we going to see the glorious military power of the human race? Don't you dare tell me that they don't have weapons on board.
1812257
Thanks for the feedback, I'll see about making those corrections.
1812264
I do believe I mentioned an armory somewhere in the first chapter? Don't worry, my friend, your entertainment is safe with me.
1812275
Yes, but you said those weapons weren't for killing, but merely displaying humanities technological strength. Also, what level of technology where the humans at before this? Laser guns? Plasma? Power Armour? Force Fields? Fusion Reactors?
1812305
Because I think this is a necessary point to flesh out, I don't consider this a spoiler. Humanity is still using projectile weaponry, although think more along the lines of handheld gauss rifles and rail-guns. Older technology such as bullet-based assault rifles and slug/buckshot-based shotguns also exist, although they are improved upon in ways that you would expect over the course of a hundred or so years (computerized sights, etc.). Primitive power armor, live HUD's, portable thermal scopes, and others are all there. Plasma weaponry exists, and there is a weapon that utilizes such technology on the ship, but it is rather inefficient and meant more for display than anything. Human technology has not advanced enough to allow Fusion Reactors or Force Fields, and as you can see the ship runs on old Oxygen and Hydrogen fuel technology. Essentially; Humanity has advanced itself in the fields of robotics and engineering, as well as information technology (see: holo-display), but such technologies as shields and invisibility cloaking have eluded them.
On the subject of how the weaponry is meant for display rather than killing: it is all very much active, and can easily kill, but it was never put in the ship with the intent to be used. That's all I'm going to give you for now.
Nice chapter, bro. I have but one gripe.
Y U NO MAKE LONGER CHAPTERS!
Seriously. It was over too quick.
1812390
But we're working on invisibility cloaks right now, in real life, how can we not have them in the story? Anyway, pretty sexy story, fav'd and thumbed up.
**EDIT**
Shouldn't they at least be using Thorium reactors?
And like, favorite, watch.
1812331
Fix'd, thanks for the feedback
1812399
The first few chapters are short and to the point to get the story started. Later, I might start writing some longer chapters, but be prepared for longer waits.
1812404
Both your original and edited points are very good. On the invisibility point, you're correct, we are already getting close... But the options currently are limited to usage underwater and on very small objects. The best anyone's done thus far (IRL) is to cloak a small object from microwaves, and don't get started on radar cloaking. This story runs on the assumption that humanity just never really figures out the whole practical invisibility thing. As for the Thorium reactors, I anticipated your question and tell you only to be patient.
I must read later.
Moar!
More
1812515
Google: quantum invisibility
I have no idea if it is a hoax, but apparently several armies have seen, and are interested in it.
Hm it does seem like they aren't really friendly to aliens in Equestria.
They didn't even attack them and yet they immediately restrain and put them to sleep.
Nice first contact on their hand.
So far first contact looks great. *sarcasm*
Awesome story though.
1821854
Um... I fail to see what's so wrong with it? It helps to separate out the computer's dialogue from the rest of the story. If you're worried about it being associated with greentext (4chan) or meme arrows (not sure who came up with this, but it's the same thing with a worse name), don't, it's a reference to old computer terminals and text-only UI's, from a time before GUI's existed. Although, my version takes a sort of "meta" approach to the concept; the format is normally "diskname">: text, but I'm going >>, which implies that the computer is granted complete root access to everything (as it would be in the case of a custom OS made for the upkeep of an manned intersolar craft).
1821877 Censoring.
He doesn't like that you censored shit.
I seriously hope that the humans don't get massively butt raped in this story. I also hope their technology doesn't get compromised way too easy. That irks me to no end.
Is this the end?
1911558
No sir, I just had a bit of a family issue for a while. Next chapter is still in production.
Maybe some dialogue would help, and what all the characters are thinking.
For Example:
Fleeing, he dashed toward the exit, opened it with a grunt, and dived out, hitting the floor 20 feet below and dissipating the impact with a forward roll. It was either this and hope that the atmosphere was breathable, or the aliens with hacksaws.
Then maybe curse something as he flies through the air and hits the ground.
Also this part, it would seem more interactive if it was a dialogue, not just a thought.
Celestia, thought Runner, this is creepy as all Tartarus. --> "Celestia, this is as creepy as Tartarus." Runner said as he explored the interior of the metal corridors.
Just some suggestions. Can't wait to read more! :)
Moar! Moar! MOAR!
Ponies are douches in most stories on fim. why?
WRITE MORE PLZZZ
1992955
Xenophobia. See: Zecora episode.
Comments were posted nine weeks ago, new chapter soon?
2009348
Second.
Dude you said you'd update over eleven weeks ago.Sorry to be predictable and complain about the lack of updates, but...
bitch asshole ponies
no offense, but that's what I got from this.
2455546
Better than big bad evil humanity V.S. perfect goody-goody two-shoes ponies.
To those complaining/otherwise (deservedly) angry about my extremely long, unannounced hiatus, I will tell you why the aforementioned gap occurred and give this story a much-needed update in a little while. Seriously, this time.
2458111 c:
to be fair, I would probably act the same way if aliens came crashing down and I was sent into the spaceship to like, look at stuff. . .
I like the story but just one thing.
With all the smoke, a gasmask would be mostly worthless. An SCBA (Self Contained Breathing Apparatus) would be better. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Self-contained_breathing_apparatus
If the ponies had something similar anyways. (Though with SCUBA gear, they should)
I have a strange feeling that you are dead. There hasn't been an update in five month.
So a ship crashes, one alien is seen fleeing in fear and is assaulted, while the other comes out of an unknown state of health and is assaulted and hit with a spell that may or may not kill him.
CELESTIA'S FUCKING ELITE. GOOD JOB GUYS. DEFINITELY NO WAR. HERE'S AN AWARD. favim.com/orig/201107/31/fuck-you-lilly-allen-separate-with-comma-shit-text-Favim.com-118244.jpg
Really man, you need to think this stuff through before writing.
2855742>>2855913
First off staying space is not all hyped up as it is said even when the ISS is in low orbit they are more radiated than the normal human. Imagine that in orbit of the sun without EMF (electromagnetic field). Over time the object the object that is supporting you will be radiated thus infecting you even with lead shielding that is for short span exposure. On the flip side humans could also use the background radiation of the solar winds to power a Madison Dynamo that would stave off solar winds or a generator. Though I do agree on the 10,000 years s not a lot of time to evolve it takes a lot of time for genetic lines to mutate or change (except with with irradiated particles). On to the space landing lol, and would you expect this to be a normal way something comes into a planet if it was crafted. In addition we base the ponies claims on ourselves. Tell yourself you wouldn't charge in there (though with a item to protect yourself with) to see if what it looked like with a large group. Peace hope to see this story continue.
2874221 would you expect this to be a normal way something comes into a planet if it was crafted
You mean how it crashed, right? Yeah I understand what you mean, but I'd still at least wait a few minutes to see if there's any activity. Maybe take that time to get a perimeter to stop things from getting in and out. All I'm saying is they rushed in way too quickly.
2874328
Ya it was a bit rushed but the "landing" I think was suppose to be that way to add the feeling of desperation. But this is the most action this story has seen for six months. Really hope for more of this story
MOAARR!
I really like the idea behind the story and the grammar and structuring isn't bad either. I could review what may be wrong here and there, but I can't right now.
does anyone here even know what a M.I.R.V. is? it's a Multiple Independably Targetable Re-Entry Vehicle. used for nuclear payload deliverance. so your character is riding a 3-7 warhead containing nuclear missile. congrats you killed all dem ponies
How long is this next chapter exactly?
I need MOOOOOOORE IN MY MIND ASAP
2140287 I was going to make my comment, but then I saw your Luna Profile pic, and I wanted to see it. I stopped and then looked at your comment. I looked at last update, and that stopped me from wasting my time. Thanks.
Why do the ponies instantly go towards breaking into an alien ship and attempting to take control of aliens they know are more advanced than them. I doubt any group of intelligent beings in their right mind would do this.
I like this story! Please continue it!
6908730
Because they recently smoked some macguffinium earlier
4883657
.
That is one definition of M.I.R.V., true. But M.I.R.V. could mean anything, depending on what it means. And just because we fit them with warheads, doesn't mean that all MIRVs have them. A 'Multiple Independent Re-entry Vehicle' could also be a group of shuttle-style ships that can cluster together for launch, then split apart for landing.
Personally, I think that the Ponies of Equestria act way too aggressively. Once they find the “Aliens” they immediately pin them down and put them under a sleep spell. No checks to see if they are wounded, no attempt at communicating peacefully. Any and all options for a peaceful first contact are thrown out the window when the guards and hazmat unit take an aggressive approach. One of the survivors was fleeing for his life for Christ’s sake. This story spells out ponies are NOT the peaceful and social creatures that thy normally are. I understand that it is an alien spaceship, but isn’t invasion of property and assault a little much?