Yeah, these sex scenes are always awkward to write.

2613809 yeah, trust me, took forever too.

2613826

.....

Wow...just wow..

FlutterSpike. 2nd fav Spike Ship.

just wow.

Well at least it got a new chapter.

But how did I read this ? I turn off my mature tag.....

0//////////////////////////////////////////////0

2613847 that was almost right, i use their personality and their backgrounds except the one spike have. The rest is from the show, and of course i might delete it, i published that shit chapter for nothing

2614178
because its under the Teen tag

2614237 can't a guy have some fun.

2614305
AAWWW YEA Finaly! someone who gets it!

2614225
Ehh? But it's very like you, there's a foreigness to this chapter that is much like your other chapters. If anything while this was... Strange to read it was still good. I wonder what Cole would say on this?

2614237
Oh that

2614483
Its alright

Well, why can't a guy have a little bit of fun right? But I think you shouldn't delete it, it shows their feelings.

2614225
Do not be so hard on yourself.

The chapter is great about the way you explored the growing relationship between Fluttershy and Spike. It was especially interesting to note that Spike despite finding that the relationship was a lie, begins to feel increasingly attracted to Fluttershy (it would be why he's never been in a real relationship before?).

As for writing, but you wrote that her eyes were purple, blue light would not.

Now, I hope the next chapter will not take much.

2614541 no, What she did to him was worse than just rejecting him.
Spike is in a special guard team for the night guard, you'll hear about it in another chapter longer on.
no, almost all of it was wrong, sorry.

2614610 i won't. i got at least 50 faves in two hours.

ok did i miss a prequell or somthing because i have no idea wtf is happening. 3 chapters in and nothing even remotly related to the premise of spikes "magic" being revealed. Then fucking anthro out of no where, why? Was it just to make the clop scene easier to write? This shit is just too confusing i love the premise so im following hopeing that it pulls itself together in the coming chapters.

Matureee

Should probably change the rating for this if you can. They have em for a reason and it could lead to this getting removed... also, slapping a 'mature' on the chapter title doesn't count.

Sorry to say but I hate this chapter too.
Besides the fact that it has a lot of description and capitalization error's, the personality of Spike and Fluttershy is just way to off to be believable from what you wrote in the last chapter.

Also you should really reframe from referring that the character's see each other as family when just being close friends would be good enough. Say that Spike and Big Mac see Fluttershy or any other close friend as a sister/brother is just going to complicate things. But if you still want Spike and Fluttershy to get together, I really think this chapter needs some major editing.

2615590 true, i respect your judgment but to be honest. It bores me to tears, i hate the story and if not by slip up of my finger i wouldn't have this cursed shit uploaded

2615620I hear you, but it is your story. If it bores you that much, just answer the question's about what happen to Spike, get to the action and be done if it.

2616674 that's what i'm trying. but once i lose interest in something it's hard to continue

I love the plot of this story. As well as this original world it is set in. This story has many more intricate complications in terms of conflict and plot turns than most I have read. I love it when I don't know how I want the story to go, leaving the author with free reign on my emotions through the rest of the story. I am truly looking forward to more.

2618006 thank you very much. Hopefully i can have the next chapter to make sense.

i uhh just um well that was exciting to read as i found it and i knw wear this was going any way's

2615620

Oh pleasepleasepleasepleasepleseplease don't change it to mature. I hate to turn on the mature tag. Please don't change it.

2618026

NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2619234it was either that, or admin would remove the story

2618830 are you sure you know where this is going

2619072 i will, it's a motherclopping Pinkie promise

2619351
Its okay. Its a FlutterSpike fic yes ?

2619537 it's a harem fic, with ten different sequels and a prequel. I Wrote that this is the first of the Unbound-series

2619546
So this include that Peach Pie and that mare in the 1st chapter ?

All OCs or ?? Is the sequel/prequel too be like this ? Mature tagged ?

Wait why 10 sequel/prequel ?

2619356

oh i have had enough XP with this and yes i'm sure i know where is going my good sir

2619561 i was bored doing my writing block and ended up making a buttload of stories. Most are finished, other's involve in spikes friends, their perspective from a point of view. Even made a final story about Spike's future or rather worst enemy.

2619707 we'll see about that, the fifth chapter will send you into a world of pinkie pie

2619724
Will it be also rated mature ?

2619749 not the one involving spike's nemesis, but the one where ______ send him to ____ _____ where he has to ______ his magic. Sorry, my brain is against spoilers.

2614739 that's good,
I forgot to add that why can't fluttershy have a little bit of fun too. Am I right?

2624071 true, but i had to flash forward a few years so she wouldn't act as shy as when she was 17 and have some courage to do thing's

2619729

GOOD! personally from personal XP'S pinkypie is better at it than flutter's sorry if you catch my drift ;)

Please, moar. I love this story.

2624310 I know what you mean. *wink wink *

2624122 yea, that might explain why she isn't her usual shy self but anyway, i wanted to ask, when in the next chapter coming, i can't wait for it even though the last one was a little bad, i still want to see the aftermath.

2625584 im not sure, to be honest it might take a week.

2627573now one thing is, when does magic come in?

2628513 the next chapter.

Watched a bit much of Doctor Who in the beginning have we? XD
But really an awesome and interesting story

2630645thank you very much. I'll make sure I don't disappoint.

2628643 ahh alright I just didn't understand where a 2 normal and one flutterspike sex chapters had ANYTHING, to do with magic