So Cheesy...

A royal servant sees a rogue group of dragons setting up camp near Canterlot and must tell Twilight. The issue: he couldn't resist grabbing a quesadilla for later that day, and the guards won't let him into the throne room until it is no longer in his hooves.

Attempt at comedy to break up the rather heavy story I'm writing now. Figured I may as well try my hooves at something a bit out of my comfort zone and actually get a proper little something out there. Made for the second Thousand Words Contest in the comedy category.

Thanks to danatron1 for pre-reading!

Era: Post season 9

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Comments ( 14 )

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danatron1

danatron1 #1 · Jun 27th, 2023 · 3 · ·

I loved this; hilarious premise, and a really solid final punchline.

I like to imagine that the guards knew about the dragons the whole time.

Mystic Sunrise

Mystic Sunrise #2 · Jun 27th, 2023 · 6 · ·

"Oh, the rogue dragons? Spike already told me about them."

"... Mother fker!"

Take your fav and upvote.

AndyHunter

AndyHunter #3 · Jun 27th, 2023 · 5 · ·

BROTHER THIS IS A GOOD ONE, YOU GOT ME DYING.

Hillbe

Hillbe #4 · Jun 28th, 2023 · 5 · ·

Spike the Hero of the Crystal Empire, Spike the Changeling King Maker, Spike The winner of the Gauntlet of Fire. Spike the Royal Advisor... Why am I here again?
Because quesadillas look worse coming out then going in darling and the theatre awaits
More rope! and Spike get the mop going over there!
How's the view Princess Cheese?
The castle ceiling has a new skylight!
Discord stop it you're not making it better
Wow a Taco Bell review Dancing Quesadillas?
I'm still here you know

Rewan Demontay

Rewan Demontay #5 · Jun 28th, 2023 · 4 · ·

A story on eating cheese for Equestra's safety with weirdness, parody, and laughs within? Weird Al approves.

SpoonierThanThou

SpoonierThanThou #6 · Jun 28th, 2023 · 4 · ·

11622677
Holy frick I didn't even think of this. If anyone who passes through here happens to know Weird Al, send him this, pronto.

That is just too funny. I wasn't even going for that.

Moproblems Moharmoney

Moproblems Moharmoney #7 · Jun 28th, 2023 · 5 · ·

Tanking Heartburn and Indigestion for the Princess, true loyalty right there

Rewan Demontay

Rewan Demontay #8 · Jun 28th, 2023 · 4 · ·

11622697
This story doubly works with Cheese Sandwich, his official character. Could be a sequel.

NaviNautical

NaviNautical #9 · Jun 28th, 2023 · 5 · ·

What a fucking trooper lmao, I want him as a messenger!

plapoco

plapoco #10 · Jun 30th, 2023 · · ·

The story is very funny.

ThePinkedWonder

ThePinkedWonder #11 · Jul 1st, 2023 · 2 · ·

That last bit got me

And way to make me hungry with all those quesadillas being so cheesy. Something being too cheesy might make Twilight want to run for her life and hide, but it makes me drool

Bicyclette

Bicyclette #12 · Sep 18th, 2023 · 1 · ·

"No can do. Princess doesn't want us holding onto quesadillas"
"Thanks for-" My brain processed what the guard said. "Wait, what?"
"She thinks if we hold onto quesadillas they'll trap us in their gooey cheese and melt us into em." The guard handed the take-out box back. "Morbid stuff."

ahaha i love it

"I... have to eat all this?" Inside the box was not one, not two, but three entire quesadillas. They had a deal at the place and I had gravely underestimated just how much food three quesadillas were.

this is the most relatable pony i have ever read about in my life

"Yeah, yeah, just give me a minute." I picked up the quesadilla on top. It was heavy, rich, and oozing with cheese. I held my breath for several seconds.
I must do this.
For Equestria.

oh hey i say the exact same thing to myself in this situation

The silence intensified as the guards exchanged awkward glances. The only sound was me wolfing down food. Ugh, what a place to eat, I must be getting crumbs everywhere, too.

um why would a quesadilla leave crumbs, unless the tortillas were somehow baked to a crisp? LITERALLY UNREADABLE

I tore into the remaining half of the quesadilla, this time more slowly and methodically, ensuring I didn't repeat my mistakes. Why did it take so long to chew? Every bite felt minutes apart. My adversaries had a way for wasting my time.

dang if only this pony’s cutie mark were in competitive eating. also wasn’t there something about dragons earlier?

"Princess, there's danger! there's-"
"Oh, the rogue dragons? Spike already told me about them."

ahaha, perfect ending!

a delightful and all-too-realistic consequence of our beloved Sovereign’s unfortunate phobia. thank you for writing!

FanOfMostEverything

FanOfMostEverything #13 · Sep 18th, 2023 · 3 · ·

So… couldn’t he have just told one of the door guards?

I do appreciate the melodrama and punchline, but this story crosses the line from silly to almost cruel by the second quesadilla. The joke overstayed its welcome just a bit too long for me. Still, thank you for it.

donutmasterjoe