Eye of the Storm

by TheDriderPony

Day 15

Derpy knocked twice on the front door, then wobbled alarmingly as the enormous box she had balanced across her back tried to fall one way and the much littler box balanced atop her uniform’s hat tried to fall the other.

After a few unsteady moments she righted them, then set both down. She fetched a key from her pocket, unlocked the door, and walked inside.

It was her house, after all.

Now inside she turned around, signed for the delivery (she could take the paperwork back to the office tomorrow) and brought the boxes inside.

Even more than a week later, it felt strange to move so freely. Her body felt so light compared to when it’d been a block of pegasus-shaped rock. While freeing, the downside meant she was knocking over even more things than usual.

Once she was inside, alone and with the curtains drawn, she allowed herself a giddy giggle of anticipation. Finally. After days of waiting, it had arrived.

Grabbing the letter opener by the door, she sliced through the tape that separated her from her purloined prize, lifted the lid… and smiled.

Within the box… was rocks.

Hundreds— thousands, even— of obsidian shards. Some were big enough she could recognize the curve of a horn or the knuckle of a finger, but most of it was so much gravel. But it was all there. Every single pebble. The Royal Guard had made very sure to get every last piece.

It was her good fortune that they hadn’t been nearly so rigorous in checking their shipping labels. By the time anyone at the Tartarus mail depot realized a package was missing, it had already been routed through a dozen redirects and loopbacks. Anyone who even tried to trace the web she’d woven would wind up fruitlessly digging through the Las Pegasus dead letter office.

Not even the most thorough gumshoe would think to check in Ponyville.

And yet here he was. Her mail-order husband, some assembly required.

She opened the second box, one that had traveled through more normal channels. Luckily, it too was exactly what she’d hoped for. A fifty-two bottle case of Dr. Whoopsie Daisy’s all-purpose superglue. More than her usual order, but this was a big job.

Derpy sighed in contentment. Nothing was missing. Everything was in place. Sure their first time together had ended in him being stoned and shattered and sentenced in absentia to Tartarus while she was flung through a window, but she’d been on worse first dates.

“Dinky!” She called out. “Do you want to help me with a jigsaw puzzle?”

“What? Yeah! I love puzzles!”

“I know,” Derpy tittered, “So I got an extra hard one for us!”

It was going to take many long nights (and no shortage of sticky hooves) but in her heart Derpy knew without a shadow of a doubt…

…she could fix him.

Comments

[Kikio3000]

Interesting story but, "Entry for the May Pairings 2022 Contest.
Cover art provided by Mutter_Butter"

A. There is no cover art, and B., Isn't it the May Parings 2023 contest, not 2022? https://www.fimfiction.net/blog/1013210/may-pairing-contest-2023

[TheDriderPony]

11598120
Whoops. Thanks for catching that. I copy and pasted directly from another fic since making hyperlinks is always so fiddly. Should be good now.

[Kikio3000]

11598121
Haha, you are welcome! Don't forget the cover art!

[TCC56]

Now that is an amazing last line.

[Anonymous Potato]

And yet here he was. Her mail-order husband, some assembly required.

Dr. Whoopsie Daisy’s all-purpose superglue.

Drider, don't ever change.

[FortressMaximus]

I'm curiously terrified wondering about the amount of rule 34 artwork this story generated.

I love Derpy, and she's totally on brand here. And Storm King actually feels like more of a character here than in the movie itself.

As I write this I'm hoping there is/will be a sequel showing what happens next. A really fun story!

(There's a joke running around in my head about hoping Derpy gets that special delivery to her mailbox, but I'll leave that alone for now).

[TheDriderPony]

11602970

I'm curiously terrified wondering about the amount of rule 34 artwork this story generated.

Given that the current viewcount is comfortably sitting at a hair over 100 views, I'd wager not much (unless this is your version of asking for permission, in which case go for it. Knock yourself out!)

And I'm glad you enjoyed it. Storm King did a bit more fleshing out because I rewatched the movie to try and accurately capture him, but it turned out he only has a few minutes of actual screen time (and not a lot of it speaking).

[howard035]

A fantastic story!

[Octoskan]

This is amazing.

[huntar21]

Thedriderpony will you make a sequel for this story when the storm king wakes up in derpys home and keeps him prisoner there