Caged

by Tirimsil

But Can't Sing

SILVER I CAN'T BREATHE not enough air I'm stuck help no one will help tail stuck heart pounding no one will help not enough air tail stuck I'm trapped pressing in heart attack I'm being crushed I'm dead pinned in can't move I'm being crushed I'm dying can't hear not enough air heart exploding help please help can't scream please help doomed she left me suffocating I'm being crushed I'm dying help please help YONA WON'T FIND ME suffocating no one will help help please help I'm trapped she's gone please help doomed tail stuck pressing in I'm trapped please help so dark it's falling on me too hot chest imploding pinned in I'm trapped chest hurts hot breath it's falling on me doomed I'm stuck I'll die I'm trapped chest hurts heart attack stuck here forever heart pounding can't breathe I'm being crushed so dark can't scream please help hot breath I'm trapped chest imploding pressing in I'll die I'm being crushed I'm dying suffocating can't scream I'll choke I'll die I'm trapped help I'm dead I'm dying suffocating doomed I'm being crushed she's gone no one will help not enough air heart exploding I'll die tail stuck help heart attack scream doomed I'm stuck can't breathe can't scream I'll choke I'm dead where is she heart exploding please help it's falling on me suffocating can't see I'm dying can't move heart attack I'm being crushed heart attack tail stuck too hot hot breath can't see SMOLDER WON'T LOOK too hot no one will help I'll die suffocating hot breath can't move can't scream pressing in heart exploding please help can't breathe pinned in help I'm trapped chest imploding I'm being crushed heart pounding no one will help please help scream I'm dead too hot doomed heart exploding I'm stuck please help chest hurts can't scream can't see please help not enough air suffocating stuck here forever hot breath pinned in help I'm being crushed suffocating heart exploding pinned in I'm being crushed so dark I'm being crushed hot breath not enough air I'm trapped can't scream I'll choke I'm stuck heart exploding so dark stuck here forever heart exploding chest hurts chest imploding she left me I'm dying pinned in hot breath can't scream heart pounding tail stuck it's falling on me heart pounding I'll choke I'm trapped it's falling on me I'm dead can't hear I'm stuck pinned in I'm dead OCELLUS WON'T LOOK tail stuck I'm dead can't scream I'll die not enough air I'm trapped no one will help pinned in I'm stuck I'm being crushed help scream suffocating I'm dying heart exploding it's falling on me so dark hot breath so dark hot breath can't move heart attack where is she I'll choke so dark doomed I'm trapped tail stuck hot breath pressing in help scream she's gone no one will help too hot chest hurts suffocating I'm stuck too hot can't hear I'm stuck stuck here forever chest imploding heart attack can't see chest hurts suffocating can't scream stuck here forever I'm trapped no one will help can't move doomed it's falling on me SANDBAR'S ASLEEP breath suffocating I'll die chest hurts chest imploding tail stuck it's falling on me pressing in please help pinned in no one will help hot breath tail stuck she left me can't see doomed heart pounding hot breath chest hurts I'm being crushed hot breath heart attack pinned in stuck here forever no one will help chest hurts so dark tail stuck doomed tail stuck no one will help stuck here forever heart exploding no one will help can't move heart attack scream can't hear heart pounding can't breathe can't hear can't see pressing in pinned in she's gone chest imploding I'm being crushed suffocating can't move I'll choke please help so dark I'm stuck tail stuck it's falling on me heart attack pinned in so dark she's gone please help pinned in please help I'm dead help where is she so dark can't move doomed I'll choke suffocating please help can't scream stuck here forever doomed I'll die it's falling on me heart attack can't scream pinned in I'm trapped she left me scream I'm trapped doomed I'm being crushed heart exploding I'm dying heart exploding I'm dead pinned in pressing in I'll die heart attack it's falling on me not enough air can't hear doomed chest imploding I'm dead tail stuck so dark can't scream heart pounding where is she hot breath suffocating heart pounding too hot pressing in I'm trapped too hot so dark I'm stuck stuck here forever scream heart pounding I'm trapped heart exploding it's falling on me chest imploding I'm stuck can't see heart attack PLEASE SILVER I LOVE YOU can't scream pressing in heart attack hot breath I'm being crushed too hot can't see scream can't hear chest imploding too hot I'm trapped it's falling on me stuck here forever can't move can't scream can't see can't breathe where is she pinned in no one will help suffocating I'll die heart pounding hot breath heart exploding I'll die I'm trapped chest hurts help heart attack pinned in pressing in pinned in scream heart exploding so dark chest hurts hot breath pressing in it's falling on me I'm dead can't scream I'm being crushed tail stuck too hot chest imploding suffocating no one will help I'll choke I'm stuck help heart attack no one will help stuck here forever I'm being crushed tail stuck pinned in I'm dying I'll die I'm trapped not enough air help chest imploding heart attack scream help suffocating where is she wings stuck I'm stuck can't hear I'm stuck she's gone help heart exploding doomed pressing in help scream pinned in scream heart exploding doomed stuck here forever I'm dying I'm being crushed she's gone help no one will help so dark I'm dead suffocating can't hear suffocating PLEASE DON'T LEAVE ME HERE I'll die chest imploding tail stuck chest hurts doomed chest imploding heart attack suffocating I'm dead can't see I'm being crushed chest hurts no one will help I'm being crushed tail stuck doomed suffocating where is she can't move heart attack I'll choke please help I'm dead heart exploding she left me can't scream chest hurts it's falling on me please help so dark can't scream she's gone heart exploding doomed I'm stuck I'm being crushed I'm trapped can't move heart attack help I'll die pinned in please help can't scream can't scream doomed chest imploding pinned in can't scream I'm being crushed can't breathe can't move I'm dead I'm stuck scream help can't breathe chest hurts she's gone too hot scream I'm being crushed pressing in stuck here forever I'm trapped I'm being crushed pinned in I'm stuck pinned in she's gone I'm stuck help I'll choke can't hear I'm stuck heart exploding suffocating help scream heart attack please help pressing in I'm stuck hot breath she's gone pinned in I'm trapped I'll choke can't breathe pressing in chest hurts too hot it's falling on me hot breath no one will help can't scream scream I'm stuck where is she scream so dark please help I'm dead can't breathe I'll choke no one will help tail stuck scream please help I'm dying can't see suffocating can't see scream help please help too hot can't move heart attack chest imploding I'm dead can't breathe I'm trapped no one will help WHERE ARE YOU

The door opened and he collapsed out into the light and onto the floor, gasping, shuddering in a tight ball, and crying.

Someone gasped.

Light I'm dying it's okay heart attack calm down, suffocating

Someone said something.

Stop, it's okay can't breathe, relax, body tense chest hurts dying

"Gallus..!"

You're, okay, slow, your, breathing

"Gallus!!"

Gallus blinked and looked up, still curled on the floor, struggling to control his breath.

Silverstream had one claw to her mouth, her eyes wet with tears, shaking all over. "I... I... I'm so sorry..! I, I forgot..." she closed her eyes in a wince. "Omigosh I'm so sorry..."

She scooped him up in a gentle hug and cradled him, and his anxieties quickly vanished. With his wits returning, Gallus blinked in confusion and looked around over her shoulder.

This was the hall just outside the girls' dormitory. If anyone had seen a boy hanging around here there would've been trouble. He had been staring nervously at the clock when they'd heard the distinct hoofsteps of Ms. Rarity, who was quite particular about that rule.

And Silverstream stuffed him into that closet without thinking. The one haphazardly stuffed with boxes of supplies and a few coats for good measure, which had pinned him right up against the door so tight he couldn't speak.

"I..." Gallus quivered. "H-how long was I... in there..." He looked at the clock again.

Not even a minute.

Ms. Rarity must have walked right past without noticing a thing.

"P-please forgive me," Silver sniffled.

He nuzzled into her and shuddered. "I'll be okay," Gallus assured her. "... Please don't ever do that again."

"I won't," she promised between sobs. "I won't."

Comments

[Moonlight_Mist]

I don't have claustrophobia, but I feel like I can intimately understand what they go through after reading this.

[Starlight Nova]

Image created by me, edited from traced show vectors.

OK, but why did you make it so difficult to make out? For most of the time I thought the scared Gallus picture was just a black square!

[Scyphi]

11290006
How visible it may appear probably depends on the screen the viewer is looking at it through--if the screen's contrast or brightness are set in such a way, I can see how the details of the cover art would just vanish away completely.

And I say this because it's perfectly visible to me on my screen, so...

[Tirimsil]

11290006

When I started writing, I wasn't sure how obvious I wanted it to be that it was Gallus before he is let back out. My intent was for the image to show there was somebody there but not necessarily be identifiable as Gallus. For me the image is quite clear, especially since I of course knew it was Gallus. And of course, the panic thought storm is fairly intuitively from him right from the jump, so I changed from tagging Young Six to tagging Gallus.

I use the dark theme on all web sites with the option and have a habit of not particularly facilitating light theme users. If you wanted to be able to see you wouldn't be using light theme. Still, I can imagine that being blinded like you opened the door to Kingdom Hearts would make it much harder to see any details of such a dark image... I can probably just raise all the colors into the mid range instead of "literally between #000 and #111" like it is right now.

EDIT: I switched back to the light theme and can still make out the image. Either you guys need to adjust your contrast, or, if you're on like mobile or something, phones need to stop sucking!

[Tirimsil]

Oh dammit, I forgot to actually make my "MAKING OF" comment like I was gonna do.

This is one of them experimental stories. In the show, Gallus is claustrophobic. I suffer from occasional panic attacks and wanted to find a way to represent this in writing. After trying to write it the normal way for a few minutes, I realized that wouldn't work because it was coherent. It read like some mad doctor clinically describing the status of their obviously-suffering patient, and not the account of the patient per se. People freaking out don't stop and notice details and ponder things.

So I sighed and resigned myself to what I saw in so much celebrated prose and poetry in English class and write like a caveman. I took the concept of stream-of-consciousness to its primal extreme. I find this much better matches the repetitive and rapidfire nature of panic-thoughts. However, I soon found that manually writing out a "panic stream" was tedious and too much work given that most people would simply gloss over it.

Soooo I wrote a quick PHP script that is basically a panic attack generator. I plugged in tons of pieces until it wasn't too obviously repetitive. Like a caged chicken in an egg farm, I industrialized Gallus's agony.

I manually edited it to remove specific over-represented thoughts and put in unique ones spliced here and there (roughly evenly spaced over the stream.) While it does not repeat the same piece twice in a row, it can put two similar pieces one after the other, and I edited or removed the more egregious ones that I found.

I also trimmed it down to try to get around 1500 words because that number is my fetish apparently, but perhaps I should have gone down to 1200 or even lower, since I doubt the typical reader appreciates a word wall regardless of the ~artistrie~.

[Fujimi200SX]

...Well then!

[TCC56]

Now that is quite an opening paragraph.