High above the world so high, like a diamond in the sky, a space station races towards the ground.
Written for the Science Fiction Contest. Told you I'd make it, Bicyclette! Thanks for reading Those!
Special thanks to Atomic Rockets for giving me all the info I needed for this story.
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I have to appreciate any sci-fi story with a ship named Heinlein's Folly.
I especially appreciate how the description of Cetus's quarters shifts the mood from Gravity to LANCER.
Ooh, nice little Changeling Space Program reference.
Point of order: Both flying objects have been identified at this point. Also, isn't the point at this stage to lose speed?
There are some points where it feels like humans with a thin coat of Equestrian paint—the name brands do not help—but overall this what a lot of fun. Thank you for a delightful bit of madness, and best of luck in the judging.
11110380
hey man, i changed my account tagline for a reason. My paradox is i love Furry Reminders but i also love using ponies to write about human concepts.
That's what they want you to think.
Depends on your landing type, though gravity does want to pull you down faster, air resistance does help in slowing one down.
Once in thicker air, a lifting body can go into glide mode to slow down even more, non-lifting bodies need other help ...
This is a delightfully weird and wacky story.
I absolutely love the idea of using Kirin as missiles.
On one hand, characterization and worldbuilding is great. There's just enough to provide context for the story (which I think is heavyweight lifting since it's both a short story and a sci-fi fic with fantastical elements, even when you do break ordinary physics), and the limited POVs for each of the characters are well done, telling me their personalities in their short snippets and how they're introduced/where we see them (Cetus being quite peaceful in her... operating/driving/engine room(?), Batu at a cafeteria-that-might-as-well-be-a-bar, and, most especially, Azure, with as little screentime as he has here).
On the other hand, there isn't much of a point made after the climax. There is a story going on (large scale: stop the spaceships from crashing into each other; small scale: what Mohs learns about each ship [and their crew] and how he reacts to them in the end, how he ends up taking control of the situation versus him being helpless in space at the beginning), but once the spaceships land, much of the progress made seems to be thrown away with a, well, throw-away joke about stupid people and non-stupid whales.
While I understand that this is a comedy and a random one at that (so take this paragraph with a grain of salt), the length of the story doesn't really justify a rather throwaway ending (which I would accept if it were, say, 2k words or so); it doesn't help that Mohs makes a grand speech around the climax (along with his plan afterwards to save as many creatures as possible), so at least that part of Mohs' character arc (and the general point of him, again, taking control of his situation and becoming a hero in the process) should've been acknowledged after the climax, even (or especially) if in a joking manner.
That might be fixed either by removing the final section about whales and/or extending the second-to-last scene to showcase more time to flesh out the new dynamic between Ursa and a now-hero Mohs (as a nice book-end to how Ursa and Mohs interacted in the beginning).
Overall, this is a fun experience with a more than decent story. Keep up the good work!
11154661
The finale is a remaining piece of an early draft. Oh my folly, keeping the Achilles heel.
very genre-savvy title!
SCP reference?
that is a very fun nonsensical technology idea
this is very meme-y!
between this and the description of the yak space program earlier, yaks seem to be analogous to Orks from WH40K, from what little i know of the lore!
aww, what an adorable weapons system
i did really like this sequence, very fun
whew! was getting worried there
well, it did say "Random" on the tin! and definitely OCs to spare! i really liked Cetus, with her blasé attitude toward the absurdity of her powers and role, not to mention how fun her paradoxical accoutrements were. and Azure's character just shone through really clearly in the little screentime he had, one that was very fitting for a living explosive. but i admit it was hard for me to connect with the other characters, and i think it's because their interactions sometimes felt like comedy skits strung together, when the point of skits is to not have to imagine the story past their ending. it's also likely that the type of comedy in those parts just didn't really fit with my sense of humor, preferring the drier Cetus/Mohs interactions, which i did like quite a lot.
but the idea of an impossible pirate spaceship held together with duct tape and inexplicable yak engineering, contrasting with a very by-the-science-book Equestrian spaceship hobbled by institutional rot and uncaring leadership, is a really awesome one. thank you for it!
11221500
Hell, that's right, I did something with this story.
It's good to see you enjoyed a largely nonsensical romp for what it is, and I appreciate the attention I got during that contest. I look forward to your next. You've really built a name for yourself in the last 2 years on here.
11224423
the current one is ongoing, and thanks!