- Member Since 28th Apr, 2013
- offline last seen Yesterday
concordion
an amazing balance between feelings and emotions and incredibly hot M-scenes
concordion
Joined 28th Apr, 2013 ·
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concordion · 19k words · 129 24 · 2.7k views
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I've read all the stories in this series, what I don't understand is why the first one pissed me off more than the rest of them. Decent series though.
Love this series, especially how it seems to avoid every cliché. Even in good erotica I don't often get a feeling that I just read something very new, here I have it to the highest degree. The editing is also great, specifically cutting everything unnecessary; it seems these stories consist entirely of the good parts. Hope to see more, especially Spirit's fate.
Funny how my first thought after reading that one part of this story was "how can Cadance know it's Steward's?", and by the end the story agreed. Knowing baby's sex before pregnancy is even visible also sounds suspicious.
Also, I spent some time trying to find Flamingo in previous stories, because I remembered clearly there was a character with such name. Looks like the old Flamingo goes by Carnaval now.
That doesn't really apply to time bombs. Oh sure, you can exist in blissful ignorance for a little while, but eventually that timer hits zero and the whole thing blows up in your face. Considering just how reckless Cadance is being, that fuse may not be very long at all.
This one didn't really get me like your others did, it just made me feel sad. Mostly for Shining and Twilight. I hope Twilight gets her wish someday. I hope Shining learns the truth soon.
I really hope that this line of stories ends with all this shit backfiring in twilight and cadences face. It would be amazingly funny and justified given the lengths of shit they go to here.
yeah, the description was promising, but you should have mentioned that big fat OC you have put in, lost my interest thanks to him right at the beginning.
Thinking back on it, this fic pretty heavily reminded me of this picture.
derpicdn.net/img/view/2018/7/13/1779963.png
Good times.
I hate this series and yet feel compelled to read it. I don't think I even get aroused by them, especially not this one.
Probably has to do with the cheating. It's probably the one kink, besides cuckoldry, that's pretty universally hated. Because humans are hardwired to despise traitors. And what betrayal could be worse than the love of your life cheating on you? At least the last one gave me some hope things might improve. This one just makes me wonder when the bomb will go off.
It's also frighteningly easy to imagine how Shining would react to learning the truth about things. I'm not sure Steward would survive long after, if at all. Shields can be terrific weapons if applied right. And he knows all about shields. Could crush the arrogant jackass with slow, deliberate force, listening and watching him scream his last breath. Probably scare the hell outta everyone.
Yeah, I put way too much thought into him getting revenge, and punishing his wife and sister. I don't think he'd kill the girls, but politics in Equestria would get might sticky after he tosses them in the dungeon. Celestia and Luna might not approve, but I don't think they'd approve of the lifestyles of the two other Princesses either. Then again, this is your AU, so maybe I'm holding out false hope.
I could say so many other things, but I'm content to watch and just say my piece. Doubt you'd listen to anything I'd tell you to do, so I won't bother. And in any case, if you keep piling on the BS, I won't be the only one to call you out on it. I just hope nobody considers any of this healthy or normal. Because it's not. And it can only end in tears and possibly bloodshed. It doesn't work any other way.
10413847
).
The first one is netorare, basically unwilling cuckolding. The story is seen through Spirit's eyes.
The second and this one are mostly cheating (with the 2nd one having some loli) seen from Twilights and Cadances POV.
The third one is netori, netorare but from the view of the cuckolder (is that a word?
So, yea, three different fetishes about cheating. I'm hoping for the next one to be netorase, so we get a full set
10413847
You've read all the stories in this series? Thanks! Why did the first one arouse you more than the others? Meh. I'm probably a one trick pony. (See what I did there? 'Cause it's MLP porn?)
10413946
Shit, that's some super detective work. I appreciate the dedication. Yes, I retrofitted the off-handed name. I just liked Flamingo more.
10415818
Hey, don't feel too sad. Maybe Shining is into it? Or maybe he's got his own thing going on? Plus, it's implied that he and his little sister bumped uglies all night long. Can't complain about that!
10417489
Maybe? I think it's more likely that things will grow to be somewhat normal.
10417495
Sorry to let you down, friend. Each of these stories has been pretty OC heavy, though.
10420035
God, that's a good comic.
10466378
I'm ... sorry? I think? Also, thanks! I love that my writing is so ... I'm gonna say compelling? Provocative? ... that you'd keep reading despite not liking it.
Like heroin.
10478618
I learned a new word today. Little insider scoop: the next one will include another of the Mane 6 and Spirit. I don't think it'll be very NTR, though.
To everyone else who reads and likes and favorites, thank you! I promise I'm working on more, but I have a bad back and real life takes up a lot of time.
10481181
Not aroused, pissed. I'm not entirely sure why but the way she was being treated for some reason made me angry. I've read other stories with similar premises but for some reason that first one just made me mad.
I can't... I just don't get why so many people make these docs where they just rag on Shining. I honestly feel like he deserves better. Even if he wins, he somehow loses!
10481181
Compelling, yeah. Though I dunno if I'll keep reading it or not. Still not a fan of the whole cuckold stuff. There's a reason it and adultery are pretty reviled kinks, even among those who say "don't kinkshame" in all seriousness. =P May just be a natural human reaction to such matters.
10484556
I agree. I also hate how often he seems to get turned into a sissy, or even a mare. I don't quite understand why people want to take a perfectly good stallion, one who's faithful, brave and kind, and then mistreat him. I could maybe understand the darker stuff, like Sombra raping and breaking his mind, but the rest... I dunno. People seem to have a weird fascination with corrupting the good guys. The more good they are, the stronger the desire.
Heh. Maybe I'll write a reversal someday. Someone corrupt being taught that there are things much better than slutty sex. And that, yes, they can have it, whether they feel they deserve it or not.
10486624
Yeah, and this one went way far with mistreating him. His wife is unabashedly having multiple affairs, and she doesn't really care about how it would hurt him.
10417489
I second this
The thing I don't get is why people get so upset about Shining. Yeah, I noticed it too when reading, left a bit of a weird feeling at the end of the fic, but it's Porn for a reason and really, if that's the one thing I have to suspension-of-disbelief, it's still leagues better than the vast majority of porn fics.
Also, TwiGuard is amongst the hottest things in existence, thanks for writing more of it!
10504378
Aww, thanks! Can I ask what it is about Twilight and her Guards that makes it hot?
10503392
I sincerely want it all to blow up in their faces. I could go into detail, but it gets... Pretty dark.
So now we know the origin on how and why Twilight became a whore in the first place and why she lets her own Royal guard fucks her while also treating them the way she does.
I read the comments in the first book. Some people saw Twilight as a victim of real rape and thats how she ended up the way she is. Only to find out that she was in love with Shining Armor, rape him after he started dating Cadence, and he would fuck her like a whore every day.
So the real victim in all this is Shining. Despie his role in this Twilight the one who rape him and took advantage of his moment of weakness. But now that he married to Cadence; he moved on and wanted to be a good husband to his wife. Sad that she's not doing the same for him and cheating on him behind his back and the child shes pregnant with is probably not even his.
Twilight on the other hoof couldn't move on; she loved how Shining would just take her when ever he wanted, she loved that he needed her to sate his lust. But when it all came to an end, she couldn't accept that. Twilight is too addicted to it all; which why she lets literally anypony do her; and her guards remind her of Shining but she treats them like crap because she doesn't want them to be anywhere near like him, its why she wants them treat her badly.
I know boots want to save Twilight from herself; but part of me hopes he doesn't succeed. I love whore Twilight to much.
10505328
I might answer this one...
Personally i find the twi-guards situation to be really good because from the get go they explain that twilight could stop them at any time, but she doesn’t, she likes being dominated, she likes the strength and power of her guards even while despising them and herself for her “kinks”
It plays to both one accepting their inner most desires while also being ravaged by one or many pent up stallions.
There’s both domination/submission and free will dueling each other and it makes for a very interesting set up.
it’s also cute to see Twilight forced to accept her inner desires while also trying to fight them, and her guards usually convincing her to go with what feels good rather than what her neurotic mind fears and pressures her to do.
I think this chapter is really good becasue i think it explains a significant feature of all the princesses...
Not only do we learn that Twilight and her guards are not a unique situation, Cadence’s staff screw her as well (she’s more accepting and less prone to fighting against those feelings/desires)
but we also see that all of the princesses have serious doubt about their leadership, their responsibility, one reason that those like Twilight and Cadence also try and curb their fears and self doubt with sexual encounters, and or are more open to them becasue of those things.
I always figured Twilight’s guard fetish came from Shinning, but at the same time i think it’s interesting, almost like loyal, determined and chivalrous Shinning became her go to model for what a guard should be, only for her current guards to disappoint her in being lecherous, molesting pigs (even if she secret has desires for that kind of thing)
None of them match up to Shinning or the ideal he crafted for Twilight of what a proper guard is supposed to be.
Honestly one of the very few fanfics I am still excited to read continuations off. Just something about the strangely messed up and yet emotional world you have created. Swings from sexy to depressing to sappy.
Glad it still sees continue, even when best boy Boot/Spirit is not in it.
10486618
cuckold is fundamentally different from cheating...
The cuckold person is aware and consenting to the thing. The cheated person isn't.
That is a quite important difference.
About this one...
Cadance is a HUGE hypocrite...
And she IS aware of being fully in the wrong.
It is written well but... Don't know...
10589482
I did say "it and adultery", so I'm pretty sure I'm aware of that. Still think it's weird. I just don't understand the appeal of it. And I'm not convinced that it's healthy at all. It's certainly not conducive to child-rearing.
Please don't try to change my mind. I'm pretty sure it's made up and I really don't have the patience for such a conversation. I'm pretty sure I know where it'd go.
I don't know why I read these stories even though they rub me the wrong way(no pun intended).I mean, the characters and the relationships are so...toxic.They just feel irredeemable.I'm usually a person of high morals and seeing these characters trying to justify cheating and abuse and rape...oh god...
How the absolute fuck did I not read this earlier?
Good god, concordian. You can fucking write. This series s far and away my favorite thing on the site, and I've seen some shit. To me, this is as inspiring as coxswain's "Breaking Twilight," as memorable as xenophilia, and more enchanting than the mare on the moon. I fucking hate all the characters, every fucking one of them, and it's the hottest thing on the site. I'm not even sure what or how.
The words you use are just normal words, but they paint a relief of Michelangelo's Sistine chapel of debauchery while the rest of us can only turn them into crayon doodles of stick figures with tits, and sometimes if we're lucky, an oddly shaped cock.
You are the reason I don't go to bed and the reason I get out of bed. I hate you like Twilight hates her guards, and I'll read any lecherous drivel you post with a smile on my face and your literary cock wherever the fuck you decide to put it. Thank you, from the bottom of my soul.
Because you killed the rest of it.
This was damn hot!
I didn't expect that I would enjoy Steward's character so much but I actually did, and quite a bit. Him being absolutely shameless about cucking Shining was reaaaaly fun. I loved the parts where he taunted Cadance and Twilight about fucking and impregnating them in front of Shiny. Hope he'll eventually do it too!
People here love to fantasize about Shining finding out and 'punishing' them or whatever, but given that in this universe everyone seems to be inexplicably lenient on cheating I wouldn't count on that. More like he'll be into it and see it as a kind of taboo pleasure. Maybe he'll even tolerate Steward taunting him to his face about it, getting off to that. Now that would be great! Given your answer in this thread this seems closer to what you're going for, no?
One thing that I did find a bit difficult to grasp in this story was the conflict between Twilight and Cadance. It's presented as Twilight basically trying to tear away her brother from his new family, which is obviously a super shitty thing to do, even by the standards of this universe. Though I don't understand what she's counting on, since it's clear that Shining is not going to just abandon his wife with an unborn foal.
And yet at the end of the story, Cadance is confident that Twilight will not spoil the secret of her illicit affair for the fear of breaking up their family... which was exactly the thing Twilight was trying to do just a day ago? And the reason why Cadance kinda hated her? Cadance had mentally chided Shining for thinking that Twilight would get over her crush after a year, so it's not like she would seriously think that Twilight had completely abandoned her goal after a single day.
And if Twilight never actually intended to break their family and simply wanted to have sex and a closer relationship with her brother, then I'm not really sure what the conflict in the story is about. Seems like that's something Cadance would be all for, given how she gets off to the idea of Shining fucking Twilight. Overall, I feel like it has some internal contradictions that have not been fully resolved.
Anyway, sorry for trying to nitpick the plot here, it was just something that got my attention I wanted to mention it.
Kinda regret I didn't read this story sooner, cause I've enjoyed it a lot. It got lost in my "Read Later" shelf together with a bajillion of other fanfics. But this one definitely stands out both in terms of quality and hotness so I'm glad my hands finally got to it.
Cadence is a pretty massive hypocrite in this, but I'm definitely liking this weird universe.
Ironic giving what Cadance did this chapter.
But I guess her being a hypocrite is kind of the point.