2022)

August 29, 2020

Sweet Apple Acres

It had been almost a week since Jack had learned of Apple Bloom’s true feelings. The first couple days of being aware of his friend’s attempts to flirt with him had been awkward, to say the least, but he was starting to get the hang of ignoring them.

Today, Applejack insisted on showing him and the Crusaders something before they could get up to their usual mischief. They followed her through one of Sweet Apple Acres’ many orchards, not knowing what to expect.

“Where are you takin' us?” Apple Bloom asked.

“We're almost there, young'uns,” Applejack responded.

“That doesn’t really answer the question, AJ,” Jack pointed out.

“I've never been here before,” Sweetie Belle said, curiously glancing between the apple trees.

“It’s kinda overgrown,” Jack noted as they brushed through thick growths of ferns.

“Ouch!” Scootaloo exclaimed, having been slapped in the face by one such fern as she followed Apple Bloom.

“Oh. Sorry,” Apple Bloom apologized.

“Are we there yet?” Scootaloo asked.

“I would assume the answer tuh that question is the same as it was the last seventeen times ya asked,” Jack answered irritably.

“Here we are,” Applejack said.

“Or not,” Jack corrected himself.

“What are we lookin' at?” Apple Bloom asked.

“I have no idea,” Scootaloo answered.

“What is that thing?” Sweetie Belle asked.

Jack knew exactly what it was and had to resist squealing like a schoolgirl with all his might.

“Cutie Mark Crusaders, welcome tuh yer new clubhouse!” Applejack exclaimed.

As the Crusaders looked up at the worn-down treehouse, no one spoke a word.

“Well, don' thank me all at once,” Applejack said, leading Jack and the Crusaders up the rotting ramp. “This was mah clubhouse when Ah was yer age. Sure it hasn' been used in a while, but it's empty and on a secluded, private part of the farm. And it's all yours,” Applejack said as a small section of the roof caved in. “It just needs a little, uh... TLC.”

The Crusaders looked like they were about to complain, but Jack interrupted before any of them could let out a peep.

“This is awesome, AJ!” he exclaimed. “I haven’t built a fort since I was a… since before I came to Equestria!”

“Ah’m glad ya like it, Jack,” Applejack said, leaning a hoof onto the clubhouse wall. “Maybe ya’ll will get yer cutie marks fixin’ this place u- waaah!!” she cried as the wall she was leaning on collapsed.

August 30, 2020

Sweet Apple Acres

Despite their initial misgivings, the Crusaders had quickly grown fond of their new clubhouse, having spent the entire day prior rebuilding it to a usable condition. They’d grown so fond of it, in fact, that they went right back to working on it as soon as they woke up the following day.

“So, Jack. Ah was wonderin’ if ya might wanna go see another movie with me this Friday?” Apple Bloom asked as they worked on the tree house’s second coat of paint.

“This Friday?” Jack asked. “Um… I’m afraid I have plans.”

“What kinda plans?” Apple Bloom enquired.

“Um…” Jack started, thinking of an excuse.

Luckily for him, they were interrupted by a buzzing sound. As the noise grew closer, a flash of orange and blue burst through the bushes.

“Oh, hey, Scoots!” Jack exclaimed as the orange filly dismounted her scooter. “How’ve you been? Nice entrance, by the way!”

“Thanks!” Scootaloo exclaimed. “Wow, you two did all of this?” she asked, pointing to the clubhouse, which looked good as new.

“Yep!” Apple Bloom exclaimed. "We've fixed the broken shutters, sanded off the splinters, rebuilt the roof, painted....”

“That's so cool,” Scootaloo complimented. “What's Sweetie Belle up to?”

Apple Bloom showed Scootaloo through the brush to where Sweetie Belle had been working.

“There ya are, Sweetie Belle!” Apple Bloom exclaimed. “See? Ah told ya we could find her by following her totally awesome voice.”

“What's that sweet tune you're singing?” asked Scootaloo.

“Oh. I was just working on our new Cutie Mark Crusaders theme song,” Sweetie Belle answered, blushing bashfully.

“Cool!” Apple Bloom and Scootaloo said at the same time.

“Teach us?” Scootaloo asked.

“Well, I've only come up with one part... but okay!” Sweetie Belle agreed.

Cutie Mark Crusaders Clubhouse

Sweetie Belle spent the next few minutes teaching Jack and the other Crusaders the song she wrote.

Jack thought they sounded pretty good. Perhaps Scootaloo could use a little work, but otherwise, it seemed as if the girls had a natural talent for singing. Then again, most of the ponies Jack had heard singing seemed to have a knack for it.

It was at that point when Applejack chose to check on them. Complimenting them on how well the clubhouse had turned out, she then enquired as to what they would do next. The answer, of course, was crusading.

And that’s what they spent the next few hours doing. They started out trying to take care of Applejack’s pigs, but, despite all the slop they wound up slathered in, still no mark. Their next stop was taffy-making at Sugar Cube Corner, but they only wound up stuck in the machine having to be rescued by Pinkie Pie as Sweetie Belle gave Sakura the stink eye (The latter responding with an innocent wave). From there, they moved on to Carousel Boutique to try for hair-dressing cutie marks. Unfortunately, the clown afro hairdo they offered was not as big a hit as they’d hoped. Next, they moved back to Sweet Apple Acres to try their hooves at a card-guessing game which turned out as well as the rest of their attempts. They tried mountain climbing at a rocky outcropping just outside town limits, they tried snorkeling in the pond, but nothing worked.

Eventually, they found themselves in the library attempting to get research cutie marks (as they had tried librarian cutie marks already.) Unfortunately, their research had left Golden Oak Library an absolute mess with books and scrolls piled up on the floor, much to Jack’s dismay.

“I had nothing to do with this!” Spike denied as Cheerilee walked inside.

“I’m ashamed to say I did,” Jack sighed, lamenting the mistreatment of Twilight’s collection of primary historical sources.

“What is going on here?” Twilight asked, her voice raised.

“Hmm... well, we sure aren't gettin' our cutie marks for bein' researchers,” Apple Bloom said.

“No! No, you most certainly are not!” Jack shouted in anguish.

“Girls, I think you're going about this the wrong way,” Twilight explained. “Instead of trying to do things in areas you're not familiar with, why not try doing things in areas that you already like?”

“And I have the perfect place to start,” Cheerilee said, pulling a flyer from her bag.

“Showcase your talents...” Apple Bloom read.

“...for all to see,” Scootaloo continued.

“Perform in the Ponyville school talent show!” Sweetie Belle exclaimed.

“Hey, that should be perfect,” Jack noted. “Instead of constantly trying things that you don’t know, you can hone the skills you already have by being the best at the talents you already have.”

“There'll be all sorts of awards,” Cheerilee added. “Best dramatic performance, best comedy act, best magic act... surely you can find your talent.”

Instead of taking this advice to heart, the Crusaders began listing a slew of new talents, like juggling, that they could try.

“My little ponies!” Twilight exclaimed. “You're missing the point. Think about the things you already enjoy doing. Think about what you're already good at.”

“Sure! We can do that,” Scootaloo agreed.

“Yeah! Sure, we can,” Sweetie Belle nodded.

“Well, whatever we do, we'll do it as...” Apple Bloom started.

“...The Cutie Mark Crusaders!” The girls finished together.

Outside Golden Oak Library

The Crusaders rushed outside to prepare for the talent show. As Jack followed, he heard something from beside the doorway.

“Pst…”

Turning to the source of the noise, he saw Diamond Tiara, Silver Spoon, and Sakura Blossom standing next to the door.

“What do you want, bitch?” he asked, glaring at Diamond Tiara.

“Be careful how you speak to me, ape,” Diamond Tiara smeared. “My father…”

“I don’t give a shit about your father,” Jack interrupted. “What do you want?”

“I was just wondering why you hang out with those losers,” Diamond Tiara explained with a smirk. “I mean, it’s obvious they only hang out with you to make them feel better about their blank flanks.”

“I thought it was because they have a cru…” Silver Spoon tried to interject, only to be silenced by a glare from Diamond Tiara.

“Is that the best you have?” Jack asked. “You’re going to have to do a lot better than the whole your friends only hang out with you to feel better about themselves line. I heard that one and far worse growing up.”

“Growing up?” Silver Spoon asked. “But you’re our age?”

“Shit,” Jack thought realizing his slip up. “I meant at my old school,” he corrected. “Sometimes words just mess up in my mouth! Heh heh.”

“He’s broken, Silver Spoon,” said Diamond Tiara said. “Anypony who saw his outburst when he started class knows he belongs in an asylum.”

“Been a while since you made a slip up like that,” Emerald Jack said as Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon walked into the library. “You’re lucky these kids haven’t learned any critical thinking skills yet.”

“Shut up!” Jack said. “Why don’t you try to come up with more convincing lies?”

“Sumimasen, Jack-sama?” Sakura asked.

“Huh?” Jack asked, having forgotten she was there.

“I wanted to thank you for keeping my secret,” Sakura said. “I was worried you and the Crusaders would tell everypony.”

“Her secret? Oh, from the other night!” Jack realized. “Don’t mention it. If you aren’t comfortable with the rest of the class knowing, I understand. I know what it’s like getting bullied for being different,” Jack said with a sad sigh. “Speaking of which, why are you hanging out with Diamond Tiara?”

“She and Silver Spoon-san said Cheerilee-sensei would be taking applications for the school talent show in the library,” Sakura answered. “I came to sign up.”

“Oh, well, good luck with that,” Jack said. “I’m actually supposed to be helping the other Crusaders prepare for the talent show now. So, I’ll see you later, I guess.”

Cutie Mark Crusaders Clubhouse

Jack arrived at the clubhouse to find that the Crusaders hadn’t returned yet.

“Guess I can’t really do anything other than wait,” he thought.

The Crusaders arrived around 40 minutes later with six wooden planks, four-by-eight plywood, a box of nails, four cans of paint, four brushes, four pallets of fabric, a fan, and a copy of Ghosts, Goblins and Ghoulish Figures from the library.

“What’s all this stuff for?” Jack asked.

“A super awesome dramatic song for the talent show, of course!” Scootaloo answered.

“Right! With super-cool scenery and amazing costumes!” Sweetie Belle added.

“And mind-blowin' dance moves!” Apple Bloom said, standing upright and shaking a hoof.

“That sounds great!” Jack said encouragingly. “I assume Sweetie Belle will be the lead singer?”

“Well, actually, I was kinda hoping to design the costumes instead,” Sweetie Belle said. “Singing in front of a crowd doesn’t sound very fun to me, and I know a little bit about sewing from watching Rarity.”

“I’ll be the lead singer!” Scootaloo announced. “I’ll come up with a wicked rock ballad!”

“So, I guess that just leaves Apple Bloom with dancing and me with set design,” Jack said.

Jack did pretty well with the set design, all things considered. His experience with painting had mostly involved bathroom walls at the state park and never anything artsy. But for the most part, he’d managed to keep all the colors within the lines he’d drawn to plan the designs out.

The Crusaders, on the other hand, were wholly incompetent with their tasks. Scootaloo had no clue how to write lyrics and was forced to turn to Sweetie Belle for help. Sweetie Belle had no idea how to sew and had to turn to Apple Bloom. Finally, Apple Bloom couldn’t dance to save her own life and had to take pointers from Scootaloo. By the end of the day, it was not looking like they would be winning any prizes.

August 31, 2020

Cutie Mark Crusaders Clubhouse

It was the day of the talent show, and practice was not going well. The music and outfits were decent, but unfortunately, the girls weren’t able to dance without tripping over each other.

As they exited the clubhouse for a break, they noticed Applejack backing away from the clubhouse.

“Hey! Did you see us practicing?” Scootaloo asked.

“Uh... yeah,” Applejack answered awkwardly.

“Well? How'd we do? How'd we do?” Apple Bloom asked eagerly.

“Uh...” Applejack started, unable to think of a constructive response.

“Speechless!” Scootaloo exclaimed. “See, girls? I told you that's what we're gonna do. We're gonna leave them speechless.”

“Yay!” the Crusaders cheered.

“‘Speechless’ is right,” Applejack muttered as the Crusaders went back inside.

Once they were inside, the Crusaders put on their costumes. When Jack saw them, he couldn’t help but notice that Scootaloo and Sweetie Belle’s make-up vaguely resembled what glam rock bands like Kiss would wear.

Ponyville Schoolyard

The talent show began just as the sun started to set. The first act was performed by Twist and a few other fillies from Jack’s class and was basically a magic show using sweets that twist had made the day before—making a candy cane disappear and pulling a chocolate bunny from a hat and whatnot.

What followed was a fashion display by Diamond Tiara and Silver Spoon and a wide variety of performances from the other students.

Presently Sakura Blossom was nearing the end of her performance. With the help of Snips, Snails, Rumble, Featherweight, and Pip, she put on a Noh play about a lonely Neighponese demon pony who went to live with her Germane father after angry villagers killed her mother.

It was done quite professionally. The props were minimalistic, allowing for greater emphasis on the characters. The masks were expertly carved from quality wood, the outfits were made of silk, and the performance was accompanied by chants and instruments courtesy of Snips, Snails, and Pip. Most importantly, the lines were few and far between, with the narrative being told more so through exaggerated movements.

The play ended with Sakura bowing to her father (Played by Rumble), showing her fealty.

“How about a round of applause for this highly imaginative work of theatre from Sakura Blossom?” Cheerilee requested as Sakura, and her lackey's exited the stage. “Now for our next act, we have Sunny Daze and Peachy Pie reciting their favorite poem... on roller skates!” she announced as the two fillies skated onto the stage.

Back Stage

Knowing they were next, the Crusaders were quietly preparing for their song.

“My little ponies! How are you doing?” Twilight asked, having come to check on them.

“Nervous...” the fillies admitted.

“Don't worry. You're gonna be amazing,” Twilight said confidently. “Remember, just stick to what you know best. I can't wait to hear you sing, Sweetie Belle.”

Sweetie Belle wasted no time explaining she wasn’t the lead singer. As Twilight learned that Scootaloo was the lead singer, Apple Bloom was in charge of choreography, and Sweetie Belle was in charge of costume design, she grew increasingly concerned.

“I won’t be going out on stage tonight,” Jack said. “Singing in front of other people just ain’t my thing.”

“Really, girls? Are you sure...?” Twilight asked the Crusaders.

“Cutie Mark Crusaders, you're on next,” Cheerilee called. “Break a leg!”

Jack had seen the entire disaster from the stands and cringed as the props came crashing down on his friends. He’d designed them to be sturdy, but there was never any accounting for how clumsy and destructive the Crusaders could be. As the Crusaders walked off the stage with their heads down, he could tell that things hadn’t gone how the girls expected.

Less than a minute later, Cheerilee and Spike came out from behind the curtains along with the Crusaders, who tried their best to hide behind the other contestants to avoid further embarrassment.

“Let's hear it for all our talented fillies and colts,” Cheerilee called.

The crowd in the stands began stomping their hooves on the ground as Jack awkwardly clapped.

“Our first award goes to... Twist, Toola Roola, and Coconut Cream for best magic act,” Cheerilee announced.

“Thith ith stho awethome!” Twist exclaimed as Spike placed the medal around her neck.

“The next award goes to... Sakura Blossom, Snips, Snails, Rumble, Featherweight, and Pip for best dramatic performance!” Cheerilee announced.

The crowd of foals moved to receive their medals, exposing the Crusaders, who quickly ducked behind Sunny Daze and Peachy Pie. As Sakura received her medal from Spike, she gave Jack a wink. However, this went right over the boy’s head.

“And finally, the last award of the night goes to... the Cutie Mark Crusaders!” Cheerilee announced. “For best comedy act!”

Jack smiled in relief as Spike handed the girls their medals. Everything seemed to have worked out. Wasting no time, he rushed backstage to find Twilight already there.

“You here to congratulate them too?” Twilight asked.

“Yep,” Jack nodded.

“Let’s go then.”

They found the Crusaders disappointedly staring at their flanks. Clearly, they had been hoping for cutie marks.

“Congratulations, ponies!” Twilight exclaimed. “Job well done.”

“All things considered, I’d say that went well,” Jack agreed.

“Thanks,” The Crusaders said sadly.

“Hey, you don't sound too excited,” Twilight noted.

“What’s the matter with you guys?” Jack asked. “You won a prize; you should be proud.”

“Yeah, but we didn’t get our cutie marks,” Scootaloo said sadly.

“Which is the prize we really wanted,” Sweetie Belle added glumly.

The Crusader’s melancholy didn’t last long. As Twilight was about to comfort them, Apple Bloom declared she knew why they didn’t get their marks. When Twilight asked them to elaborate for a friendship report, the Crusaders revealed they thought they were trying too hard and that they should embrace that their true talent is comedy.

Jack facepalmed. They had learned nothing!

Author's Note:

I feel like I relied too heavily on the transcript for this one. Oh well, I can edit it more later.
Next Time: The Order of the Yellow Rose makes their move in the Royal Court with an immediate vote on reorganizing the Equestrian government. Taken by surprise, the more Conservative representatives of the court are approached by a mysterious foreigner who offers them support in exchange for a favor.

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