Twilight's Nightmare

by Nightsclaw

Fragments: ?????

Author's Note:

13/12

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With a soft movement of her quill, she wrote the last words that would ever be written in the current book. "Well, this is a precarious plight thee find thyself in Celestia… whatever will thou do?"

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Comments

[Nightsclaw]

11823500
All up now sorry for the wait

[Mister Morden]

Damn, I am left with more questions than answers. This series of chapters was a trip...

What happens next? Is the story reaching it's end?

[Nightsclaw]

11823534
This is not the end of the story just the end of this act. The end of act one out of three. The next chapter is almost ready to be edited so there is still more left to this trip yet.

[PixelBat]

11823539
ACT 1 OF 3?!?!?!

My god I did not think this story still had so much more to go, but I will be enjoying every step

[Dagon M Dragoon]

Hot fucking damn, that was one hell of a ride.

[Jest]

11823539
Huzzah!

Hot damn, after the chaos of those chapters, I am in need of some aftercare and explanations. Great work.

[Nova_Wings]

Reading this group of updates is like:

[CharonX]

Wow, a true banger of a chapter (well, chapters)

Also, what a mess. While I still don't believe that Celestia's intentions were truly malicious (and I am very happy to read that I was somewhat wrong what was going on with her Warmind - really love the characterization), I can see how Celestia's character flaws (e.g. her excessive desire for order/control, leading to unbreakable rules that end up screwing things over - first Discord, and now the Warmind) were a main factor in creating this perfect storm. Getting serious "paved with good intentions" vibes here.

Wow, again, thank you for the story so far and I can hardly wait to read more.

[Killer20]

Holy fuck that was the biggest mindfuck I ever experienced!!!

I love it!!!

[Killer20]

11823539
Knew it!

This FELT like just the beginning, like there was still SO MUCH to be covered, especially after that Harmony Chapter!!

Let me just tell you: This Story is peak Storytelling!
A solid 10/10!

The ONE thing you could criticize is how you handle Candice sometimes, but the Story isnt over, so lets just see where Candice is headed. I always accepted how Candice was written because I always thought you knew what you were doing and this Series of chapters just proved it BEYOND a Doubt.
We can take a side trip to Bikini Bottom and I‘ll just be like: ok sure, This will all make sense by the end of this!

This Story was ALREADY up there with some of my Favorites of all time but These chapters just bumped it up to the Very top I feel!

[Bloody_Tofu]

Bwa!!?!!

[Thing56]

So Fucking Hype!!!

[Corax Morn]

I'm catching up here!!!!!!? What heinous crime did I comit to deserve this?

[Kairee]

And so it all breaks apart, because of arrogance. Because of an oversight. Because of an absolute set in stone and forgotten. Nothing will be the same anymore.

[Nightsclaw]

Thank you everyone for your comments. They all mean a lot to me and help me stay motavated to keep this project going.

11823542
11823854

Thank you, glad you liked it.

11823544
Thank you. This has been what the story has been building towards since page one. It is both a relief and very satisfying to have finally gotten to this stage. I think the characters are also going to need the same. Both will come in time.

11823624
Yep, that about sums it up.

11823634
11823804
Yep. it's such a good and crazy mental image. if I was richer there would be art of it,

11823640
Thank you and you are most welcome. I started this to share my story and get better at writing. I think I have achieved both.

11823674
11823757
If I did a poll I think a lot might say yes to that.

11823720
Thank you for all your comments and I'm happy you liked the story.

11823697
In this world, one single second is a very very long time in a real fight between fully ascended Alicorns. So if you can cheat.

11823807
New band name: Buring Crystal Alicorn?

11823861
Sorry, I have not found a way to send my work back in time. There is more in production atm so I will try not to keep you waiting too long.

11823894
Arrogance and meddling from others all added together to make these moments happen. But yes it was the arrogance that meant Tia had no hope to avoid it.

[Mezilsa]

So...basically the whole disaster that threw the biggest wrench we could find in the gears of "everything get's better" was a VERY UNLUCKY "If-else BURN DOWN EVERYTHING" - code statement?

A spoiler question:
So...I don't understand how PP, AJ and Rarity got hurt. Can someone explain?

[Agent of Chaos]

11823974
if I read the part correctly, they were also caught in the explosion that hit fluttershy

[MadCelly]

O M G

[Nightsclaw]

11823974
11823980

Yes that correct, they were there when the sacrifice ritual was activated. As Fluttershy was linked to Twilight (becasue of the Bats issue) Twilight saved her remotely by swapping in a thestral wellspring to replace the one she had ripped from her. The link to the others were not as strong and as they were members of the three main tribes as Mr. Scroll defines them the magic ripped most their wellsprings away ruining the parts of their bodies they channel their magic through normaly. So unless Twilight saved them they were going to die in pain. It was only their conection to the EoH that allowed them to stay alive long enough for her to get there in the first place.

[Nightsclaw]

11823996
ok, sure.

[Killer20]

11824005
When I first read that Chapter I was totally losing my mind because I thought the PoV Character was The Original Twilight, and I thought: „That makes ZERO SENSE WTF?!?“

Like I mean OG OG Twilight from way back when.

But rereading it now it almost seems like the Twilight that was making all the desicions in the Previous chapter was a FRAGMENT that probably was tasked with keeping their friends safe at any cost, maybe not even consciously created by Twilight?

[Nightsclaw]

11824030

Only read this if you really want the answer
part of her was willing to give up everything to save her friends... The part what would do anything to live she ingnored so hence a fragment. The only question is which one is the fragment and which one made the other by accident.

The pov is the part too frantic to survive to drift off in to memories of a happy moment. It can happens anytime an alicorn is in conflict with themselves.

Hope this helps.

[Killer20]

11824037
Makes sense, thank you!

[Max Stroberger]

11823539
So everything you've written so far is act one, and act two is gonna be just as long if not longer, dude you rock.

[Killer20]

11824037
Now I regret reading the answer because my brain already made up a theory… why did you have to write that it can happen anytime an alicorn is in conflict with itself?

because now my brain jumps to Daybreaker and Mask right away and thinks if maybe THAT is how they were created, Celestia wasnt sure if she wanted to Act on a situation or not, and therefore created 2 fragments for both sitiations, one for staying passive, and one for Acting swiftly.
Maybe because she saw it as a waste later on, she repurposed the Fragments later to be her Warmind and her Mask
Maybe even Nightmare was created this same way!

DONT TELL ME IF I AM RIGHT OR WRONG, I DONT WANT TO KNOW YET!

[Nightsclaw]

11824125
Becuase it is a fact that came up way back when Night was teaching Cadance about what it realy ment to be an alicorn. There is a lot of things , sometimes very small things that are imprtant to what happened so I thought a reminder would be helpful.

[2tail]

The rules really mess with Celestia. Daybreak was forced to act in a away she hates and even forced to try to kill Twilight till Celestia was able to allow her to try to spare Twilight.
Early in the story I was thinking that Daybreaker was going to be evil. But it sounds like if not for the rules forcing her, she would have allowed Twilight to do what she was doing.

I love the mask the most.
Edit:
Now I am just thinking what it would be like if Celestia does not return soon. A few chapters of time of seeing the inside of her head as Daybreaker (still tied up) and Mask working together to fill in for Celestia.
Stuff being so far from what the rules expect, so they get more freedom.

Giving how Celestia was with plans and rules, would she had planed for dying and leaving the other two behind, or think that she knows so well that could never happen?

We know that Little star will not react well to one of her mommy dying. But what about Little star. Or even Little star?

[DivinePanzer]

The last few chapters are really annoying me with how fragmented and confusing they are.

1) HOW DID CANTERLOT GET NUKED?! After all, why would Moonlight Scroll want his ritual to send power to Celestia's residence? It should be focusing that power on him, whereever he may be, so he could ascend. Sure, him being tortured in Twilight's bastion could have screwed up that part of the ritual, so...

But it's probably not a consequence of the ritual, Instead...I have no idea. Why would Celestia teleport PAST twilight and Ponyville, so that when she has to act, and miss, she hits Canterlot?! Also, I wasn't sure where Twlight was when she was trying to deflect Celestias attack, but how would she deflect it past Celestia without hitting her friends?

2) Did Celestia Prime die? I was under the impression that it's impossible to kill an Alicorn in her Bastion. I could buy Nightmare having enough time and enmity to research a way to do so...but that scene still confused me because why would Daybreaker have been restrained if CP is gone?

3) Did Nova do anything? Or did she blow up Canterlot wanting to hug her parents?

4) The scene with Candice's twin was confusing, because I can't remember names well and was she sheparding a Twilight fragmeny or Celestia's Chosen or a bystander...

5) Is Grey now permanently an owl familiar?

Might have been more but that's all off the top of my head with a day to reflect on it.

[dragonus85]

Ok I liked the mini chapters for each fragments pov. Loving this story.

[Max Stroberger]

Well I guess every fragment will probably hate Celestia's guts now I highly doubt Luna is ever gonna forgive her sister for what she's done.

[Nightsclaw]

11824332
1) HOW DID CANTERLOT GET NUKED?!
The city did not get nuke nearly the mountain has a new tumble melted through it.

Once patchwork was sure everyone else alive in the area would be safe behind Candice's reinforced protections she did not care where the redirected energy went.

2) Did Celestia Prime die?

No she was dumped in to a nightmare by Nights last attack.

3) Did Nova do anything? Or did she blow up Canterlot wanting to hug her parents?

She used her fire to fight back against Celestia's and attacked in the physical world as others attack Tia's bastion.

4) The scene with Candice's twin was confusing, because I can't remember names well and was she sheparding a Twilight fragmeny or Celestia's Chosen or a bystander...

She was given one of the parts of Twilight.


5) Is Grey now permanently an owl familiar?

No like before she is just driving the body Little Star made

Hope this helps and thank you for reading.

[MadCelly]

11824558
and will be able to act accordingly now that the limiters are off...

[Trixie Hugger]

Nightsclaw, I really, really thank you for this story. I am not exaggerating my feelings or writing this impulsively, but wow, "Twilight's Nightmare" is something, lad. It is freaking berserk level, like "My Little Pony" by Kentarō Miura. It is so, so good. I repeat myself, it is so, so, so freaking good. I am amazed, astonished by so much quality. Only side effect, it's really difficult know to enjoy something else, be it a movie, a book, or something else. Nightsclaw, do you know how good you are, how much your story touched me? It's crazy. Thank you again lad.

[KatieBreeze]

Fimfiction is being mean to me ;-;
It doesn't wanna mark this chapter as read, so I keep seeing it in my tracking folder and thinking there's something new. STOP TEASING ME, FIMFICTION

Edit: Commenting seems to have fixed the bug. I was curious if it would, but I'm surprised that worked.

[Nightsclaw]

11828653
Thank you very much, my readers are one of the main reasons I have the motivation to keep writing.
I hope you continue to enjoy the story as it continues.

All the best.