Good ending for a really interesting Story

Spike: "Mom. Dad. I, uhh, I got my sister pregnant!"

Wow that's a lot of kids for a guy

pretty good story despite all the broken english

Really good

9405220
Dad e Mon: * holding rifles and carrying *

sequel?

9405800
In a way yes

We've seen older harem stories but what about Young Harem stories?

9405768
Sir, they don't carry rifles, they carry Shotguns!, It is a Shotgun Wedding!!

9405994
Just curious here but would we eventually learn how Majesty met her end and if she is truly dead or not?

9431428
Oh she is dead, as for how well have you read that all of it let?

I may have to re-read, but when did Starlight use a fertility spell on these girls? I mean, they are got Spike on separate occasions, so when did Starlight get the chance to even use the spell on all of them?

EDIT: I read the trip to Canterlot parts. The way it was worded in the second chapter, I thought he got them on separate occasions. Chapter Four told me different. Never mind.

9405589
My apologies. I thought I fixed all the broken English. Or at least fixed all of it enough to be legible. I tried to not have to re-write the entire story from scratch. Guess i didn't do a good enough job.

9489289
I think you did

If u haven't read the story, don't read this. It's a good read....

"I'm fine with that part, as far as I can tell right now anyway, but those guardmares. I don't even know their names and I just found out I got them pregnant?! That is nowhere near the same thing as finding out we are having kids!" Spike said

I agree with Spike on this. They should've told him from the beginning. Exactly what his Royal Duties are.

"That bring us to why we had you do them. Think of it less as sex and more as donating sperm directly. All those mares wanted strong healthy foals and come from happy herds. That is why we picked them and before you ask, to them and their children you will be no more their father then any other sperm donor." Luna said

And, If I was Spike that would've pissed me off more than anything. Did I sign up to be a sperm donor? Did I Have A Choice?! NOO! YOU JUST TRICKED ME INTO BREEDING! NOW YOU'RE TELLING ME I'M NOT EVEN GOING TO BE A PART OF MY KIDS LIVES!! I mean honestly there's so much wrong with that shit man.

But, besides that and all of the forced anal play on SPIKE it was a good read. I mean when I read anal I thought it would be spike doing it, not having it done to him. I was cool with the finger up his bum and the rimjob. Cause I know niggas who've told me they had they're girls do that for them.

"Cadence honey if you like that vanilla stuff then you're going to love this!" Celestia said as she made spear hand signs that she impaled deep into the anuses of both Spike and Luna.

But a whole fist my nigga? Butt Plugs?? Especially since you wrote about how much he dislikes the shit.

Spike never thought of making a list of things he didn't want to cum because of, but between Luna’s and now Celestia’s insane fetishes he was thinking he might have to. And this would be near the top of the list if not the top of the list. Unfortunately for him Luna's own orgasm was enough to set him him off, causing him to fill her up yet again with his rich seed.

Like come on bruh for real.

9546808
Well they did give him a reason for all of this

9546821
Yep afterwards. When it was to late, and his only options where to regret, or forget about it. It's a good read.

But, a lot of dudes would lose trust after going through something like that fam. It's the type of thing that can, and has ended friendships.

Think about it like this. Would you want me to tell you that I've Stabbed holes in your condoms before or after you had sex. Yea they told him...

It was to late though because he didn't have a choice. When you go to donate sperm. You made a choice to donate. With me stabbing holes in your condoms you didn't get that choice.

Furthermore not only did I take that choice from you, but I also decided that you can't see your future kids. Like I said man it's a good read. But, there are some fucked up things in here bruh.

9547356
And that the only fucked thing you are going with? Because add things that are probably worst or did you mess thoses? Because I'm not saying I didn't add fucked up things in this story, I'm saying you're probably going with the least fucked up things I put in. And wait till you read the sequels

9547890
I look forward to it my good sir.

Wish you warned us of the watersports......

9584707
Well it was more of a joke then anything, so I don't think it counts

He is a pet.

Wow... What a end...

This was an interesting read. You had some good lore for the story. Yet I will say could have used an editor and pre-reader.

My biggest issue is how they just How Spike willing breed unknown mares. Spike being the nice guy that he is would still want to be part of his kids lives even if it was a direct sperm donation. Spike would have been asking questions before just fucking something and not pulling out.

Still decent. The middle chapter dragged out cause of having so many mares to breed. Could have been cut short to avoid being boring. And the swallowing pee part since it did nothing for the story could be taken out all together.

ok, i gave this story another chance, and there's soooo many either misspellings or wrong words it almost pained me to read the 2 or 3 chapters i missed earlier (using Dictate instead of direct, for instance) So, i'm gonna be skipping all its sequels as i'm gonna haveta expect them to have the same problems

10180924
I have to agree (although I think the author does get a bit better in the sequels). Bad grammar and spelling can really ruin an otherwise-decent story.

10708509
Well, if he can't be bothered to edit them out, then he doesn't really care about the story, and I was already Iffy on how Spike was basicly being treated as a glorified sperm donor instead of a person in this one, they don't even ASK him about some of the things they do, I'd have run off before the end of that first day in the castle, and they STILL haven't told him what he is by then. They only spill the beans after the Mane 6+ come up and say what he is.

10708737
No videos please