• Member Since 18th Aug, 2013
  • offline last seen 9 hours ago

Olden Bronie


"Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind" Dr. Suess and Bernard Baruch

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Source

Hearth's Warming Eve is a time to spend with family and friends, making special memories. Octavia enjoys the pomp and tradition of the holiday in Canterlot. But when an unfortunate circumstance has her spending the holiday in Ponyville with Vinyl, she will learn more than she knew about her friend and the true meaning of the season.

Written as part of the Jinglemas Secret Santa as a gift to Mavinator5.

Chapters (1)
Comments ( 13 )

Mmmmmmmmmmm not bad for a first story indeed!! :raritystarry:

Comment posted by Olden Bronie deleted Dec 30th, 2017

8638288
Thank you! I'm glad you liked it.

What did you do to the characters/signs/letters?
It is horribly hard to read like this x.x

8638863
Yes, sorry about that! I'm going to fix those tonight. Hope you'll give it a re-read.

8639031
i will, DJ-Octy is one of the best ships.

I enjoyed this story. It warmed my hearth :> Thanks for writing, and I'm glad to see you've finally posted a story :D

8655182
Thank you! I'm glad you enjoyed it and thank you for the favorite.

For your first published story, this was a very nice premise! And a Hearth's Warming story at that! :twilightsmile:

If you'd like I can go through it with you and edit. It could use a run-through. :twilightblush:

8936134
I'd like that. Thank you for the offer. I'll catch up with you about it tomorrow.

8936144
Sounds good. Talk to you then!

Thank you for directing me to your story while we were in line for the burlesque. This was a nice little story, especially for a first one. I'll definitely look out for any future ones. Thanks again.

Well, this was quite an interesting read. It meandered a little at times and was a bit exposition-heavy here and there, but overall it was rather enjoyable and definitely falls among the better first stories I have seen on this site. Furthermore, there's quite a bunch of typos littering the text and a bunch of runaway commas--There is never a comma between the closing quotation mark of a dialogue line and the dialogue tag/beat. Also, when I opened the story on my PC, I noticed there are some empty white rectangles signaling the use of some odd symbols. I cannot see those on my phone though, but maybe a formatting check is in order.

I apologise if people already told you all this, as I see the story is quite old and you already got some feedback :twilightsheepish:

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