• Published 12th Nov 2017
  • 928 Views, 49 Comments

Jack Spicer's Quest to Conquer Equestria - CrazedLaughter



Jack Spicer and Wuya are teleported to Equestria after a fight with Omi and his friends. Jack, using his evil genius, plots a magnificent and fool proof plan to take over the new land he finds himself in. Also Wuya is there.

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Chapter 31 - Xialoin Showdown! The Final Battle!

"You think You're all big and bad with all that power? How about I make it where everypony is equal! We challenge you to Battle Square!" Scootaloo placed her hoof on the comic book, giving an arrogant smirk to Wuya

"SCOOTS! WHAT ARE YOU DOING?!" Jack screeched. He didn't want her to be involved "DON'T DO THAT!"

"B-but why? I want to help too! We're in this together! right?" Scootaloo looked into Jack's eyes.

"Yes Jack...aren't you two together in this? Because I accept the challenge...with an adjustment of the wager of course." Wuya gave a sinister grin.

"Wuya! She isn't part o-...oh no" Jack winced as all three of them started to glow, as did their wagered objects.

"Yes! I'm part of it!...you're going down Wuya!" Scootaloo hopped down from Jack's arms and entered a battle ready position.

"Not so fast...You have yet to wager something...so..what Shen Gong Wu will you be betting? hmmm?" Wuya's teeth were as sharp as a shark as her grin grew more sinister.

"Wuya! She's not pa-MMH..MH" Suddenly Jack's mouth shut. He frantically tried to get it open. But he couldn't.

Wuya's hand was glowing and pointing towards him. "Quiet Jack...can't you see we are negotiating? now then..." She looks down at Scootaloo "Your wager, if you don't mind"

Scootaloo realized she had nothing to wager with "But...aren't I wagering the comic book?" Her ears lowered, she was hoping this was an acceptable bet.

Wuya shook her head and waved her finger "noooo...Jack is wagering the comic book" Jack tried to pull Scootaloo away, but suddenly he was being held down by Wuya's magic. She kneeled down and looked straight into Scootaloo's eyes. "what's wrong little one...don't you have anything of your own to wager?"

Scootaloo stepped back "N-no..."

"Well, then let me explain something....Since this isn't a normal showdown trio...but one that would put me at say...a handicap. Then I can force a being such as yourself who has no Wu to wager something much bigger than usual....to dragon rule levels...such as your life....I've always wanted a little butler...how does that sound?"

"No!..No!" Scootaloo started to yell, closing her eyes and barking at her "I'LL NEVER SERVE YOU! NEVER EVER!"

"You don't have a choice...or a chance..." The throne room began to expand and sink into the ground into a square shaped arena "I've already accepted and I get the choice of your major wager. I hope you're ready to serve me eggs on a side of toast in the morning" Wuya released her hold on Jack as the arena placed them on two different corners.


"YOU WON'T WIN! BAD GUYS NEVER WIN! ISN'T THAT RIGHT JACK?!" Scootaloo looked up at him.

"...." Jack sighed, suddenly recounting countless failures, then said half heartedly "...it sure is"

"Well then, little horse. how exactly does this challenge work?" Wuya asked, looking around. "It looks like a normal fight to me."

Jack started to panic "OH MAN! SHE'S RIGHT! SCOOTS WHAT WERE YOU THINKING?!"

"I I dunno...I thought something was su-....hey..what's that?" Scootaloo noticed a white cube float down from the sky and into the middle of the arena. And it started to glow. All three of them looked at it intently before it suddenly released a gigantic flash. They all covered their eyes.

"What in the world was that!?" Jack said as he went to rub his eyes, but instead he ended up poking them "ow!..what happened? that's o-HEY!" Jack ended up falling to his side "Why don't I feel right? Scoots...are...hey..your head"

"uhhh...Jack" Scootaloo was staring at Jack with a very odd expression. However from Jack's perspective, he could see a horn on her head, and her wings were bigger

"Woah, Scoots...you got a horn now....uh...wait...how did that happen? What's going on?" Jack tried standing, but only ended up falling to his other side.

"huh?" Scootaloo looked up as high as she could and could see the tip of her horn. "Woah...it really did work"

"What worked?! Why can't I stand up! I feel really weird!" Jack started to panic again, and started to bounce and flail

"Jack...c-calm down. I mean...uhh...do you have a mirror?" Scootaloo slowly inched towards him, trying to avoid his flailing

Jack slowed his flailing and focused his attention to Scootaloo "No....w-why?"

"...uh....take a look at your..umm...hooves..." Scootaloo said, almost giggling at his panicked form

"hooves? I don't have.." Jack looked at his...hooves. Suddenly, the gross reality hit him as his pupils shrunk "......AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH I'M A PPPOOOOOOOOOOOOONYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY" Jack screamed in the highest pitch he'd ever screeched since he was hit in his balls.

"A-actually...you're an alicorn pony...eheh" Scootaloo corrected him

"I DON'T EVEN KNOW WHAT THAT IS! AHHH! THIS IS HORRIBLE! WHAT HAPPENED TO MY BEAUTIFUL BODY AHH!" Jack started to flap around as sparks emitted from his horn. His fur was pale white, his mane still in the shape of his hair. His helipack gone, replaced with large wings. "AHHHHHHHHHH!" He flapped about until suddenly crashing back onto the ground "OWWW MY FACE! WHAT'S GOING ON?!"

"Well...it's sorta why it's called Battle Square...because I thought everything would be square as in equalized...pretty clever huh?" Scootaloo smiled happily

"NO! I DON'T EVEN KNOW HOW THIS BODY WORKS! WE'RE DOOMED, DOOOOOOOOOMED" Jack screeched, still being unable to stand up right.

"Don't worry Jack, I got a handle of having a pony body...since..hehe..I am a pony. I just need to learn how magic works.shouldn't be too hard. I bet Wuya is having a.." Scootaloo turned towards the ponified Wuya, Who was standing in a menacing way. Her chest puffed out. Her dress was reshaped to fit her brownish fur. Her mane, dark red and wild like her original hair. It seemed she had already gotten used to her new alicorn form. "...a massively...hard...time" Scootaloo gulped

Wuya raised her hoof and moved it from side to side, getting a good look at it "Hmm..not bad, I didn't think I could pull this look off...Nowhere near as good as my original body. But atleast I finally got to see a pony who actually looked good....even if it had to be myself."

"This isn't good....maybe" Scootaloo began to feel worried and turned to Jack "Come on Jack, you gotta get used to being a pony and quick!"

"BUT I DON'T WANNA BE A POOONNYYYYY!" Jack whined

"Any time now. I do have a whole multiverse to conquer, you know" Wuya didn't seem the least bit surprised in being a pony. She even began to internally wonder if she was getting too used to the world she found herself in.

"Give us a sec!" Scootaloo turned to Jack "Jack! Come on! Stop being a chicken and get up! Just do it one hoof at a time. Like this!" Scootaloo lowered herself, then slowly moved each hoof one at a time to stand.

"o-ok...ahrm..ok" Jack nodded, and slowly tried it. managing to successfully stand in his first try. "H-hey! look at me! I'm doing it!" His legs were a tad shaky

"Good Work Jack. you managed to do what a foal can do. Aren't you proud?" Wuya chuckled

"SHUT UP WUYA! I'M STILL GETTING USED TO IT!" Jack retorted

"Temper Temper, I suppos I should get used to this body myself...let's see" Wuya trotted at first, then began to do an elegant dance, filled with spins, loop de loops with her wings. and then finally using her horn to blast the ground to create a double explosion on both sides of herself. "A little rusty, but I think that was rather alright...what did you think, Jack?"

Jack looked at her angrily, puffing his face "Show off"

"hehe...well...as much as I enjoy being a prime specimen of your own pathetic species. I'd rather not wait any longer. Are you ready to lose or not?" Wuya was growing impatient

"One more minute! Geez!" Scootaloo was really beginning to worry "Jack, come on. We have to be ready!"


"I know, I know" Jack was carefully trying walking, he was getting used to it "Ok..so everything is equalized right? I'm gonna guess we are all ponies because of you right?"

"Yeah I think so" Scootaloo nodded

"Ok...and the super magical power we have. That'd be from Wuya right?" Jack wondered

Scootaloo nodded "yeah, that was the idea when I came up with this challenge."

"Ok....so....what did we get from me?" Jack really wanted to know

"oh ummm...uhh.." Scootaloo couldn't think of a thing "...We don't really have time to think of that right now. are you ready? I don't think we can hold off forever."

".......wait! I wanna know what everyone got from me!" Jack was super curious

"......uhhh...you're..mane..hair?" Scootaloo took a guess

"Really? HAHA! I always knew my hair was the best evil hair ever. But for it to translate to everyone having the...uhh..hairness of my hair! That's gotta really mean something!" Jack chortled

"...yeah..sure..Jack! Focus! You gotta focus! We gotta beat Wuya!" Scootaloo was doing her best to get him to focus on the task at hand.

"R-right. ok!" Jack turned to face Wuya "Ok Wuya, you're going down! You can't beat the both of us! We are as powerful as you are. So there!"

Wuya wanted to make a witty comment about that. but she didn't want to overplay her hand. "Just get on with it!"

Jack was itching to show her he was the best. Pony body or no Pony body "Come on Scoots. We can take her. are you ready?"

Scootaloo floated up and hovered in place, her movement was more graceful with her new wings. While Jack's helipack changed into large white wings. Scoots Helipack remained, only made more powerful due to her new powerful wings. "I'm ready, it's all or nothing. It can't be too hard...it's one versus two!"

All three looked at eachother and nodded.

Then they all yelled out. "Gong Yi Tanpai!"

The moment the battle started , Wuya aimed her horn at Jack and shot a yellow blast at him that immediately sent him into the wall.

"JACK!" Scootaloo yelled as she saw him fly backwards




"Well that was disappointing...ahh well" Wuya shot a second shot at Scootaloo, who managed to fly up and dodge the shot. "Of course, I always forget that EVERYONE is better than Jack." She started shooting short bursts at Scootaloo "Stay still you little brat!"

"Ngh!" Scootaloo dodged backwards, forwards, and side to side as she tried to do something with her horn "Come on..I already know I'm bad at being a pegasus..don't tell me i'm bad at being an alicorn too!..ngh!..COME ON!" in intervals at which she could aim her horn, she was trying to shoot back. But she was only producing sparks.

Jack slid down the wall and felt dizzy"ugh...uhng" He shook his head to get back his senses "Man...it's a really good thing I'm used to being thrown into walls...or else that probably would have really really hurt". He slowly got up to see Wuya firing at Scootaloo "Scoots! Don't worry! I'm coming!"

Jack got up and made a mad dash towards Wuya, only to trip on his first step. "OYGH" He quickly got up and rushed towards Wuya "I'M COYGH" He tripped again. He got up and again...then tripped again. "ARGH! FORGET IT!" Jack started flapping his wings and started to fly up "Finally! now!....SCOOTS I'M COMING!” He tried zipping forward, but ended up zipping backwards right into the wall. "AGH!"

Scootaloo was getting tired of dodging and tried thinking up a barrier to at least block Wuya's shot. A thin orb appeared around her. But wuya's shots easily broke through and hit her. Knocking her out of flight! "AGHH!" she whined as she spiraled into the ground and crashed. "OMPH"

Wuya chuckled "Like zapping an insect"

Wuya walked up to Scootaloo, her horn glowing a malicious red color "Nice try, now it's time to take you out of this competition. Who knows...this might actually take you out of this life! HAHAHAHAHA!" The glow on her horn began to glow

Scootaloo was slowly trying to get up, aiming her horn at Wuya. But she couldn't get a blast to come out of it. "ngh...I can't lose...not now..."

Jack slid from the wall again and fell on his back, he slowly raised his head and saw Wuya was about to blast his defenseless friend. suddenly, he felt an energy build up within him "SCOOOOTS NOOOO!" Jack aimed his horn at Wuya to try to blast her with...something. But instead it heavily misfired and rocketed him along the ground, his mouth taking in massive dirt as he sped towards wuya through a huge magical burst firing constantly at the opposite direction like a thruster.

"say goodnight!" Wuya aimed her horn towards Scootaloo as it finished its charge. But suddenly her attention was disrupted by a familiar screeech "That sounds li-OOOMPH!"

Jack propelled right into Wuya's face, sending them both flying straight into a wall.

Scootaloo cheered "WAY TO GO JACK!"

Jack walked away from the huge crack he made from the wall, dizzy and not walking straight. "no problemo silly blue dolphin, ah can always leave it up to meh...ugh" Jack fell over



Scootaloo rushed over to Jack to help refresh him, but Wuya bursted through the wall, angry as a hornet before she could reach him.

"JAAAAAAACCCCKKK!" Wuya's eyes were glowing a furious red as she looked around for him, seeing him laying on the ground. "EAT THIS!"

She shot a giant ball of energy towards Jack. Scootaloo jumped infront of the blast as it exploded. Causing a giant burst that spread dust everywhere.

"....and so it's done...a two in one too. Classy" Wuya chuckled softly and evilly.

She couldn't see through the dust. But she had assumed she won...until she noticed things were not returning to normal yet. "What's going on? It should be over by now."

the dust slowly cleared. and within sight. Scootaloo was standing over Jack. Her horn aglow as a light purple barrier was around them both. ".........woah....."

"What?!" Wuya was surprised "What is this?!"

"Jack! Look! Look! Look at what I'm doing!"

Jack slowly got up, shaking his head. and could see the barrier protecting them from the blast. "Scoots...how are you doing that?"

"I...dunno. How did you do that magical rocket thing?" Scootaloo asked

"dunno...unless...you don't think..." Jack began to ponder

"oh no way! our friendship and worry for each other makes us a powerful team! right?!" Scootaloo smiled at him while she kept the barrier up

"...oh....right...that works too" Jack nodded

"Friendship?! Are you two serious?! Friendship?! You two aren't friends! Don't you remember the pain he caused you!" Wuya was preparing another blast.

"Yeah...but...I've come to understand something. Even if Jack is evil. He is also my friend. And he threw away the world to save me! He helped our friends to help stop you! He....he let me experience what flying really felt like...without asking anything in return. He gave it to me as a gift with no strings attached. We have our differences...but when it really mattered he came through...and then he came through again...and so...I came through for him. This barrier is a testament to our friendship!" Scootaloo held firm.

Jack grew tears in his eyes "Scoots..."

"Please. Jack is a worthless little worm that would sell you out for even the lowliest of Shen Gong Wu. Do you truly believe everything you just told me?" Wuya growled, her power fully charged

"I do" Scootaloo said, as she turned her head back to see a teary eyed Jack.

"Very well then. We'll see how strong that little bond lasts when I turn you both into ash! PREPARE YOURSELVES!" Wuya let out her strongest blast yet. a bloodred laser constantly digging into Scootaloo's barrier.

Scootaloo held the barrier as long as she could. It was holding the shot back. but her barrier was starting to fluctuate. And she was sliding slowly backwards "nnnggggggggghhh"

"You can do it Scoots!" Jack cheered her on.

"J-Jack...I don't know how long I can hold it..y-you gotta do something!" Scootaloo was groaning in pain as she did her best to hold the barrier up.

Jack started to panic "what can I do?! I mean..that was a good speech and all but! but!"

"JACK NGH!" Scootaloo was doing her best, but the barrier was starting to crack

"Ha! Figures! All that talk and you both are still going to fry! I want you to watch Jack. Because I'm going to destroy her first. I want you to see exactly what "Friendship" has gotten you. HAHAHAHAHA!" Wuya cackled as the barrier started to shatter. Scootaloo was doing her darndest to hold it.

Wuya's words echoed through Jack's head. instead of making him back down, or panic. It actually sent him into a fury. "WUUYAAA!" He yelled "NO ONE DESTROYS SCOOTS EXCEPT FOR ME!" His horn started to glow a dark red.

"what?!" Scootaloo yelled as she was losing her grip

"NO TIME TO CHANGE MY WORDS!" Jack jumped in front of her "DROP THE BARRIER!"

"B-but!" Scootaloo couldn't hold it much longer anyway

"JUST DO IT!" Jack yelled

Scootaloo, without another word. dropped the barrier. Jack blasting his own blast and holding it against Wuya's. He was actually matching her blast.

"What is this?! How can this be?! How are you doing that?!" Wuya was starting to groan, trying to output more power.

"I don't know exactly myself. But I know. That I can't let Scoots down! I won't let you destroy her! I won't let you destroy the ponies! I won't even let you destroy Omi...BECAUSE DESTROYING THAT BALDY IS MY JOB! GRRR" He was beginning to overpower her.

"NGRRR! IMPOSSIBLE!" Wuya was stepping back

"I ALREADY MESSED UP ONCE! HECK! EVEN IF I CAN NEVER GET BACK HOME! AT LEAST THERE'S ONE THING THAT CAN MAKE ME HAPPY! ONE PONY! AND I WON'T LET YOU RUIN THAT! I'LL SAVE THE WORLD...FOR HER!" Jack's blast had almost overtaken Wuya's.



"N-no! You can't! You don't believe in friendship! You don't believe in that tripe! You're evil! the same as me! You can't possibly stop me! Rgghhh" It was almost over

"You're right. I am evil. But I'm nothing like you. I'm willing to compromise. I'm willing to understand. And I've actually managed to learn a lesson in this world...and that is....THAT FRIENDSHIP IS MAGIC!" Jack's blast had now fully overtaken Wuya's, smashing her entire body in a gigantic beam.

"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" Wuya screamed as she flew back and into the wall. the blast still hitting her and sending her through it. It just wouldn't stop.

Jack released all the magic he had. Enough to stop Wuya's attack. and finally...to stop Wuya. He couldn't even see her anymore.

The arena began to disappear. And in an instant. They were back in the throne room. Wuya was nowhere to be seen. and Jack stood back in his normal form. the comic book in one hand. and the amulet in the other.

He held up the amulet and cackled "FINALLY! I GOT IT BACK! NOW I CAN GO BACK TO TRYING TO RULE...this....world" He looked down, Scootaloo giving him a mean look.

Jack sighed and tossed the amulet to her "fine....it was a good thought at least."


The battle was over.

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