Time Waits for Nopony

by Berry Delight

My "Gift"

Hi. My name is Minuette. I'm a unicorn who lives in Canterlot, capitol of Equestria and unicorn central. Most ponies here are well-to-do, with talents to match. What's mine, you ask? Well, my cutie mark is a simple hourglass, which makes ponies automatically assume my talent has something to do with time. It does; just.... not in the way that most think.

Some think I'm a clockmaker; others, the world's most on-time secretary. Some think I'm a dentist (I have no idea where that one comes from), and some even ask if I'm some kind of time travelling pony, if you can believe it.

Oh, how I wish it was one of those.

As I said, my talent does have to do with time. Time, as in, how much someone has left. For some reason, when I look at a pony, I can see these numbers, counting down like a clock timer, with slots that show the number of decades, years, months, weeks, days, hours, minutes, even seconds that pony has left. When the time on the clock runs out, so does theirs.

Obviously, having an ability like this is quite a burden. Do you have any idea what it's like to look at a family member or friend and know the exact time they're going to die? It's something I can't even begin to describe.

You may be wondering how I discovered this ability. I'll never forget that day.....

-------------------------

I was somewhere in the second grade at the time, and did not yet have my cutie mark. My parents were taking me and my older brother to see our Aunt Colgate and Uncle Crest (my Mother's brother) for our Uncle's birthday, at their house in Vanhoover.

We arrived around suppertime. Aunt Colgate had made Uncle Crest's favorite: oat tacos. We had all been seated at the dining table and begun filling our plates when suddenly, it happened: I saw a bright flash of light.

I blinked to clear my vision before looking around the table at my family, but none of them seemed to have noticed anything. I was about to shrug it off when I glanced at my Uncle.

There before him was a set of numbers, just kind of floating there. They read: 00:00:00:00:00:00:00:20. Once again I looked at my family and, once again, no one showed any signs of seeing what I was.

I looked back at the strange numbers and realized they were counting down, one with each second. What happened next was almost like slow motion to me.

15: Uncle Crest took a big bite of his taco.

12: Uncle Crest began choking.

09: Aunt Colgate screamed in alarm, rushing to his side as my Dad tried giving him the Haymleich.

07: Mother sent my brother out to get help.

05: Uncle Crest began turning blue as I started hearing a loud ticking noise.

03: The ticking was joined by the sound of a tolling bell.

02: I covered my ears with my hooves as the noises got louder.

01: I heard a snipping sound followed by a loud *SNAP* like a thick cord being cut.

00: Uncle Crest collapsed, lifeless, as the bell gave a final chime.

I sat there in a daze, everything happening around me in kind of a blur.

Aunt Colgate, crying out in panic as she shook her husband, not wanting to believe he was dead; my Mother sobbing as Dad held her, silent tears streaming down his cheeks. And my brother, rushing in the door with help only to find he was too late.

And then, I blacked out.

-------------------------

When I woke, I saw my parents standing over me with worried faces. My Mother let out a sob of relief at seeing I was awake, and pulled me in for a hug.

When they were sure I was okay, they gently asked if I remembered what happened. I could only nod, still too shocked to speak.

The funeral came and went, and honestly, I don't remember much of it. I was pretty distant for quite some time after that. I never told anypony about the numbers or the bells and other sounds. I didn't want them to think I'd gone crazy. Besides, I still wasn't sure what had happened, myself.

I didn't see any more number sets after that, and began to wonder if it was just a one time thing.

Sadly, I was wrong.

-------------------------

One morning, we were sitting at the breakfast table. Dad had already finished and was reading the newspaper. He turned the page, and I happened to notice the headline: STRANGE ILLNESS STRIKES GRIFFONSTONE. Before I could ask about it, Mom was rushing us out the door so we wouldn't be late for school.

That day, our class was going on a field trip to the Canterlot Castle Statue Garden. I was following along after the teacher next to two of my friends, Lemon Hearts and Twinkleshine, when all of a sudden, I began to hear that dreadful ticking sound.

I froze, unmoving. My friends, noticing I'd stopped, looked back at me and said something. I saw their mouths moving, but couldn't hear them over the noise. It was only a few seconds before the ticking was joined by the sound of a tolling bell, only this time, it sounded as if there were hundreds. The noise was overwhelming, and as I heard the first *SNAP*, I felt a pang near my heart.

It was all too much. I cried out in despair and collapsed to the ground in tears as the noises continued, *SNAP* after *SNAP*. It seemed as if they were getting louder, and I covered my head with my hooves, just wishing it would stop.

And suddenly, it did, as I felt a hoof on my shoulder. I opened my eyes to find myself looking into the face of Princess Celestia. Her face was calm, and her voice was gentle as she whispered, "Are you alright, my little pony?"

I hesitated. The noises were gone, yes, but I was afraid they'd come back, and that was not alright.

I shook my head, and the princess looked thoughtful before asking, "What's your name, young filly?"

"Minuette," I managed to say.

The Sun Princess nodded before pulling away and standing straight again. She extended a hoof and helped me off the ground and then asked, "Minuette, will you come with me please?"

I hesitated, nervous, but decided it would be best to follow Her Highness' orders. I nodded.

Princess Celestia turned to the teacher and said, "It's alright; I simply need to speak to this filly. You can continue on with your tour, and we will join you when we're finished."

The teacher looked like she had a question, but before she could ask, the princess looked at me and motioned for me to come with her. I looked back at my friends, who were giving me worried looks, before turning and trotting to catch up to the princess, who had already started walking. Behind me, I could hear the teacher reluctantly resuming the tour.

-------------------------

I walked alongside the princess for several minutes. I was nervous. Why had the ruler of Equestria asked to speak with me? Me, of all ponies? Had I done something wrong? Was it illegal to scream on the castle grounds?

Finally I opened my mouth to ask, but before I could speak, the princess stopped walking and held out a hoof for me to do so too.

"Minuette," she said to me. "Look around us. Tell me, what do you see?"

I was confused by her request, but did so anyway. That was when I realized we were standing on a street corner, just outside the castle. And there were tons of ponies, rushing about.

And they all had numbers floating before them.

There were numbers in front of me. So I turned to the left. But there were numbers there too. So I turned around again and again, but no matter where I looked, I couldn't escape those awful numbers.

I sat back on my haunches, and couldn't stop the tears from escaping my eyes. Was this to be my life? Forever haunted by these.... life clocks?

As I had these thoughts, I saw a bright flash of light from the corner of my eye, but I was too caught up in my thoughts to care what it was.

Just then, I heard Princess Celestia speak. "Oh dear...." she muttered. "It's just as I feared...."

I looked at her in confusion. Did she know what was going on?

"Hang on," she told me. "I'm going to teleport us back to the castle." And sure enough, we were surrounded by a bright, golden light, before being whisked away by the alicorn's magic.

-------------------------

Seconds later, we appeared in the throne room. I shook my head, slightly dizzy from experiencing my first teleportation. Travelling through time and space to get from one location to another by becoming a temporarily being-less magic form for a matter of seconds before returning to normal again tends to feel odd the first few times.

When the dizziness faded, I stood there in awe. I had never expected to enter the castle, and certainly not the throne room. Not only that, I was there for a private meeting with the ruler of all Equestria!

That thought reminded me why I was there in the first place, and my nervousness returned. I gazed up at the white alicorn, who was easily four times my size, and gulped.

Instead of going to her throne to be seated, she sat down right next to me on the long red carpet. As if sensing my thoughts, she gave me a reassuring smile before she spoke.

"I'm sorry, Minuette," she began sadly.

"Why?" was all I could think to ask.

"For what happened on the street a moment ago," she explained. "But I had to be sure."

"I don't understand," I said. What did she have to be sure of?

"First, let me ask about what happened in the statue garden," she said. "Can you... tell me why you were crying?"

I bit my lip. After hesitating a moment, I answered, "I.... heard some noises."

The princess put a comforting hoof on my shoulder. "Did those noises include.... bells, perhaps?" she asked.

I looked up at her in amazement. "And... ticking and snapping..." I said. "But... how do you...?"

"I was afraid of this," she admitted. "You see Minuette, you are not the first I've come across to have this ability."

"I... I'm not?" I clasped my hooves together and pleaded, "Then please, what's wrong with me? Why do I see those numbers? And hear those noises? How do I make it stop?" I could feel tears welling up in my eyes.

"There is nothing wrong with you," the princess replied firmly, but gently. "The reason you see and hear those things is because you have 'inherited', so to speak, this ability from the previous one who possessed this talent. I suppose they must have passed recently."

"What do you mean by inherited?" I asked.

"By my understanding, there is one pony like you for every generation. Many have come to me, seeking help and understanding. Over time I've become able to recognize the signs of a pony who has this talent, but I could not be certain until I saw your cutie mark."

"But.... I don't have a...." I trailed off as I turned to see that there on my flank, there was, in fact, a cutie mark: an hourglass. "But..... when?" Suddenly I recalled the flash of light earlier.

"All the ponies before you have all had that same cutie mark," she explained. "Though usually, they did not gain this ability so young."

"So... my talent is... knowing when others die?!" I exclaimed. "Please, Princess! I don't want to live with this my whole life! You have powerful magic! Can't you take it away?" I begged.

The Sun Princess hung her head. "I'm afraid not even my magic can remove somepony's talent," she said sadly. "However, there is something I can do to help you with it, at least."

Her horn lit up with magic, and she summoned a small, rectangular box. She opened it to reveal it held two clear oval shaped... somethings. I looked up at her in confusion. "What're these?"

"These are contacts," she explained. "They are usually worn to help improve eyesight, for ponies who prefer not to wear glasses. These, however, are special."

"How so?" I asked, curious.

"I can cast a spell on them that will help to block the sight of "life clocks"," she told me. "However, it will not last forever. The spell will only last for about ten years, and cannot be cast again for the same pony. But at least this way, you can spend your fillyhood without having to see the clocks."

"And... the noises?" I asked hesitantly.

"I'm afraid I can't do anything to prevent that, unfortunately. I'm sorry Minuette," she apologized.

"It.... it's okay. I understand," I said quietly.

The princess gave me a pained look before levitating the contacts out of the case, and then began casting the spell. The light became so bright, I had to turn away to shield my eyes. Even from behind my closed eyelids, I could still see the light.

Finally, it faded, and I slowly opened my eyes. I looked at the lenses, still floating in the princess' magic, and gulped. "Will it... will it hurt?" I asked.

She shook her head in response. "No, they're perfectly safe. Though, they may take some getting used to. Would you like me to put them in now?"

"O-okay." I forced my eyes to stay open as the special contacts got closer. A second later, they were popped into my eyes. I flinched at the strange feeling. After blinking a few times, I looked around. Everything still looked the same. When I looked at the princess, I didn't see any numbers; however, I realized I hadn't seen any before either.

"I am sorry that is all I can do," Princess Celestia said, breaking the silence. "All I can do now is offer my support. If you have any questions for me, or just want to talk, please don't hesitate to contact me, alright?"

"Okay. Thank you, Princess," I said. Then, without thinking, I ran forward and hugged her in thanks.

After a moment, Princess Celestia stood. "Shall I escort you back to your class now?" she asked.

I nodded, and, for the first time since my Uncle's death, I smiled.

-------------------------

It's been some time since the spell on the contacts wore off. It's a hard thing to live with, but I refuse to let it keep me from living my life, though I still see the numbers, and occasionally hear the sounds telling of the death of someone, somewhere.

If there's one good thing to come out of this, it's that it's taught me to appreciate what you have while you have it, before it's gone. That's why I make certain to never miss a chance to spend time with my family and friends. For the most part, I've become able to look past their clocks, so as to not dwell on it, even though they're still there.... and they'll never let me forget it.

Even so, I can't help but have those days where I sink into depression. I still remember the last thing Princess Celestia told me, clear as day: Never look in the mirror.

I can't help but wonder what she meant by that. Would I be able to see my own life clock? Would it not start counting down till I did so? Or would it cause it to run out instantly? Sometimes on those depressed days, I consider looking, even if it means risking it.

But I never do.

Maybe someday I will. But for now, I'm going to live for what I have.

To this day, I've never told anyone about my "talent". Princess Celestia is the only other one who knows.

Except for you, Dear Diary. So-

"Minuette? Minuette, are you here?" a voice called out.

The blue unicorn dropped her quill in surprise, before turning to the door and using her magic to open it. There she found a white unicorn with a pink mane and a cutie mark of three blue stars standing on the doorstep.

"Oh, hey Twinkleshine. What's up?"

Her friend frowned. "Did you forget? We're supposed to go meet Lemon Hearts and Moondancer at Donut Joe's," Twinkleshine replied.

Minuette face-hooved. "Oh yeah! Just give me a minute, something I need to finish."

Her fellow unicorn nodded and waited patiently on the doorstep as Minuette closed the door and trotted back over to her desk. Picking up the quill again and dipping it in the ink with her magic, she wrote one last thing.

So be it a gift cursed,

Or a curse gived, I know not;

But I shall carry the burden,

Till my days end; so none else need suffer. - Minuette

And with that, she closed the book and tucked it safely back in the drawer, before trotting outside to go and meet her friends; who, she happily noted, all had lots of time left on their clocks.

The end.

Author's Note:

This was pretty much the complete opposite of my other story. i don't plan on writing much dark stuff, i prefer comedy/slice of life/adventure stuff etc. But, when an idea pops into my head, well, you probably know how it goes thanks for reading!

Comments

[Cracked Egg]

OH-KAY.

Cool idea, done before, but cool nonetheless.

Have a like.

[CCC]

Here's an important question for Minuette to consider.

Can she change the value on the clocks? If she sees Donut Joe about to cross the street with ten seconds left on his clock, and then she calls out to him so that, instead of getting run over by traffic, he turns aside and greets her... does that reset his clock?

[Berry Delight]

7256773 hmmm.... That's a really interesting idea.... i hadn't thought about that. Perhaps this calls for a second chapter? Or you could write that, if you'd like.

[The Fiction Fanatic]

Whoa, this was a really nice read. Thanks for posting it so I could shove it in my eyeballs.

[TheYellowShoe]

I think CCC has a good idea.

[Berry Delight]

7256836 thanks! and.... you're welcome?

[PaintedNovel455]

so deep, i can't imange. but what if when she looked at celestia she saw 999999999999,9999999999999.555566666676.0000000000.12345567778

[The Lunar Toaster]

If I had that ability, I'd be the asshat who'd go up to my friends and be like,

"Buddy, I am tearing apart on the inside, but mister Grim Reaper's comin for yah in about 5 minutes. Go say bye to your family."

[kombi]

cool...

[Troublesome Beast]

I think this is a classic example of why there are very few tragic-tagged stories that I like. You have excellent technical skills and a great build up, but the catharsis feels cheated and perhaps worse yet, the story doesn't fit the setting.

She's not committing suicide because she doesn't wish to force this ability on someone else, and this is prior to Starshine Glimmer's little crazy crusade so there's no mentioning it to one of her oldest friends and having a potential cure be found. But there's no suggestion that Celestia has tried anything other than... a temporary solution for fillyhood. One that she doesn't teach a student at her school so she can renew. Oh, and she hasn't thought of ear filters.

The meeting with Celestia, I'm afraid, comes out as a combination of deus ex machina-- this is why she isn't suicidal or insane-- and missed opportunities. We don't see what she sees over Celestia's head. Celestia doesn't explain why this has to happen or what possible use it can be; even if it was never explained to her, she has lived long enough to see some form of pattern.

You've got a well-written melancholia to the reflection that seems completely out of place with Perky Minuette from the show, and you don't seem to really be giving a suggestion that she's learned not to just hide this sense of inevitability under hyper, near Pinkie displays. There's no sense of-- well. Of Minuette. You could just as easily have described this as an OC with a digital display on the flank and had the same result; possibly easier in some places, like the idea that an hourglass mark would be a clockmaker.

Which all leads into one of the biggest problems with the fic, and it's one that affects almost all tragedies that aren't a part of a larger story: it doesn't fit into MLP without some major stretches. It requires an AU without really having a story to go with the AU-ness. The thing is, cutie marks are specifically and repeatedly treated as the synthesis of a person's life and interests; in fact, that's more or less what we're explicitly told they are. They're not just "something unusual about the pony," nor are they "something the pony can do really well." That's the lesson the crusaders had to learn again and again.

Cutie marks represent not a special talent in the abstract sense of a talent, but in the sense of "this is what makes a pony's life feel complete." This is what they can do well because it's their personality and contribution, their calling and quest. The fic is asking us to believe that Minuette's life and personality can be summed up in: "knows how long it is until someone is going to die, gets big alarms going off when it's about to happen, can't do anything about it." It feels deeply wrong as a result; the issues with Celestia not bothering to investigate or find better means of mitigation, or share her means of mitigation is just really a side matter.

Purposeless and angsty tragedy work (sometimes) in fics about humanity and created worlds that match with human experience because they're something we have and experience. For a non-AU MLP fic, you either have to be satisfied with something like Cranky Doodle's tragedy (you can cut off before the Pinkie moment, but then there's the sense of huh? Why? still) or work in a story to fit it. It's even more so with cutie marks, because they exist as a culmination and sign of purpose.

You have excellent technical skills, and the fic floats on the edge of possibility. I agree with some of the others that it would work better as a part of a larger story. Why does Minuette have this strange ability? What is the purpose? Why must the ability remain unblocked? Etc. Heavily important is why is Minuette so cheerful despite all of this-- is it really just "Well, my friends aren't about to have their tickets punched, so hey, no worries!" or is there something greater? I'd also recommend looking into rewriting both the marking and the interview with Celestia with an eye to looking at how the mark speaks both to and about Minuette as a pony, and to add some awe into Celestia's appearance within the marksight and give some hints as to what you plan about it later.

[Berry Delight]

7257552 You make some interesting points (though i think you may be taking a fanfic a little too seriously). i didn't want to end it with her being suicidal, because a main point i was trying to make at the end is that no matter how hard things are, and even though she does have times when she's seriously depressed (and considers risking causing her own death), she's found a way to look on a brighter side because she still has things to live for. perhaps i'll write a second chapter or a sequel someday, but for now i have a lot of other story ideas i'd like to start, as well as life stuff, so it may not be too soon.

[ABronyAnonymous]

7256773
7256823

Nothing can stay the reaper's hand. You save him from the cart just for him to have a heart attack or aneurism.

[CCC]

7260266

Well, yeah, that's one way to handle that sort of plotline.

[Loganberry]

Not sure how Equestrian this fic really is -- there's an echo of the "lifetimers" from Discworld -- but it's an interesting idea and it made for good reading. My one real sticking point is Minuette, who I just can't reconcile with canon Minuette. If she'd been an OC, I think the story would have been more satisfying.

[Amethyst_Dawn]

*Slow clap, before crying*

[Bronyxy]

Poor Minuette; what a terrible gift to have.
Good story well written.

[Revan]

Excellent work.

[Berry Delight]

8515661 Thank you!