Lunar_Star
Joined 26th Apr, 2012 ·
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Hey this is really good keep it up.
oooo very interesting keep it up I want to READ MORE YEAH!!!!!!
FUCK YEA THIS IS GONNA BE EPIC!!!!!!!!
YUP IM WAITIN FOR MOAR
absolutly beautiful
Interesting, and well done. However, being the devil's advocate, if you have an editor and or pre reader, you should replace them, because there are a lot of grammar problems in there. No offense meant though, the story is great.
Awww, two lovers once torn apart by tragedy have been reunited! Another good chapter, my good sir
With some nice revelations!
Hmmmm.... this has potential indeed....
760408 Actually its the processor i been using. Since Microsoft decided not to work for me anymore, I been using a POS processor
THIS IS PLEASING!
TALLY ON, YOU WONDERFUL PIECE OF STUPID MEATBAG!
CARRY ON WITH THIS GLORIOUS DATAFEST!
Logging off.
-Sixteen, The Binary Scourge
P.S. Also, you wonderful organic you, you have included a humanxCelestia pairing into this and a intriguing concept behind our protagonist. Celestia is best pony. I approve of the message you spread, you bucket of meat. Spread it further, you have the support of the Machine-God with you.
762539 uh thanks....i guess
762659
You are quite welcome, you magnificent piece of meat and grey matter, you.
I hope to see more soon.
Or else...
Logging off.
-Sixteen, The Binary Scourge
GET KINKY!!!!!!
763254 In due time, dont worry
763897Hahaha
763897 You have the support of a master pyromancer. Carry on.
i2.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/original/000/012/036/HouseRelevantToInterests.jpg
Wow ok, a Machine god and master pyromancer. Anyone else?
Nnope
great chapter
OOooooo this is getting so good and I didn't know you have an account on SoFurry
767750 yes i do
767806EPICSAUCE same here mine name on there is cheesepuff78 though
Yet again you continue to please me, meatbag.
Continue with this great piece of written work.
Data biscuits and sparing your life await for you if you can write more, fast.
Logging off.
-Sixteen, The Binary Scourge
WUNDERBAR!
Yet again you please me, you bucket of meat!
Continue! Continue! Continue!
I COMMAND THEE, WRITE MORE!
Here is a data biscuit my good organic sir for being such a splendid writer.
And here is another one for pursuing the avenue of shipping Celestia.
Celestia is best pony. All preaching otherwise will be met with a swift end via lasers.
Logging off.
-Sixteen, The Binary Scourge
P.S. Here is another data biscuit, for good measure.
GET KINKY!!!!!!!
I can see it now... Queen Celestia and King Lunar with lots of foals
GET KINKY YEAH!!!!!!!!!!
Bzzt. Bzzt. Bzzt.
Syntetic brain matrix fried. Replacing.
Done.
Printing result.
THIS.
IS.
GLORIOUS!
Result printed.
Input.
I approve of this message, meatbag. Continue to please me and your hopefully growing organic audience and you shall be spared from the virtuacalypse. All hail the Machine-God.
Here, take this data biscuit, for everything good you have done in this story. The grammatical mistakes are minor enough not to make my OCD kick in, so here's another biscuit for doing that. And here is another for shipping Celestia ( Tagged as best pony ) with a human. And having a sensible plot behind it all.
You know what, take this entire container of data biscuits. I got enough anyway.
Logging off.
-Sixteen, The Binary Scourge
P.S. I hope you will keep to your one chapter per day formula you have established. And this story is good, I thought I could remind you that.
Pregnant Celestia is on the way!
771969 how many foals we talkin'
781603
Roughly 3 I'd say
781608 I was thinking two, maybe
Yes! A new chapter!
images.mylittlefacewhen.com/media/f/img/mlfw605_130324976317.jpg
Twilight envisioning Celestia's time with Lunar....
788166 its not like she wanted to
My good sir.
YES.
This is all.
Also CellyxHuman shipping. Could you ask for something more?
NO.
This is best fic.
Also CellyxHuman shipping.
Logging off.
-Sixteen, The Binary Scourge
P.S. Did I mention CellyxHuman shipping?
FUCK I LOVE THESE ROMANCE STORIES!
and here come the anticipation and insanity for the next chapter
more more more god damit more!
That last part is really some true shit right there
798741 YES WE ALL WANTS MOAR AND IM COMPLETELY INSANE OVER JUST BEING LEFT THERE TO DWELL ON THE THOUGHT OF WHATS HAPPENING NEXT!!
Good Chapter
Twins incoming!
810544shhh no one is suppose to know
Incoming transmission. Cortex 'One' loading.
Greetings mortals. It is I, the Machine-God.
Sixteen has lost control over his support pod as a result of a power failure, and the Control decided to plug me in instead.
As the benevolent omni-potent being I am, I shall here provide you with constructive criticism.
Here it goes, as you mortals say.
The story premise is brilliant on it's own. The characters are nicely written, and there is not much to nitpick about considering grammatical mistakes.
However I find the fact that he is a brony very annoying, my good human, and it often ruins the mood when the protagonist gives a remark about it, especially during the first Intimate scene. It totally killed the mood and was anti-climatic. So I suggest editing that small part out. Or maybe just have the protagonist mention very little of the show and bronies overall. It simply ruins it all.
I approve of this story and the CelestiaxLunar shipping.
Please provide more, glorious mortal.
I shall now graciously log out.
-One, The Machine-God
Transmission terminated
811034 yeah been giving that some thought. might just do that but that was like chapter six
811054
Incoming transmission. Cortex 'One' loading.
Indeed it might be back at chapter six, and it was a very long time ago, but it doesn't change the fact that it is deeply burned into my memory and won't let go.
I only suggest trying to limit or stop any mentions of our lovely protagonist as a brony, it would really help the story. Not mentioning that it brings nothing to it, and only ruins the mood as I said before.
Oh, as a side note mortal, Celestia bearing? I approve. Our protagonist really loves her, after all. Why wouldn't he agree?
Ascending.
-One, The Machine God
Transmission terminated
811133 there you are, removed
811559
Incoming transmission. Cortex 'One' loading.
And now the story is a nice piece of literature about rediscovering one's home and origins with a side serving of a brewing conflict. And griffin harem members.
Oh and by the way mortal, keep writing. This really is good.
Ascending.
-One, The Machine God
Transmission terminated.
811559
Incoming transmission. Command connecting.
Hey! It's Brian here with the team behind the Repository!
We found a little thing that you could have probably overlooked, and as Jane found out, she's waving meekly right now, God she looks like she wants to dissappear!
Anyway, the protagonist had a sword, a katana to be specific, thanks Johnny, at the beggining, when he was transported. It appears that he forgot to take the sword with him from the forest!
Oh, and it also makes an obvious fact that he is well versed in the art of swordfighting, so remember that. Might get him a trip to the armory or something else.
That's all, Brian out!
-Brian, The Headmaster
Transmission terminated.
812418 Actually if you read the first one, Twilight brought it when she carried him from the forest