It's been three months since the changeling invasion was put down. Twilight Sparkle has been working on a spell that can call the Elements to their holders to make it much easier to prevent another attack. When she goes to try it, things don't work out as planned.
The six bearers are teleported to a place they've never seen with technology far more advanced than they had ever dreamed of. The beings on the ship call themselves the "Terran" and resemble the humans of legend.
oh dear sweet jesus you know the story is going to be bad when there are spelling mistakes in the short Description
Hmmmm............So this is the beginning of Liberty or HoTS?
Will you make the story goes off rail? Because ponies are very off rail-ly.
Amethyst Blade. this is gonna be the beginning of Liberty
I look forward to the next chapter. However. I have to take my doubt. Do you plan to return to some pony or be equetre a zerg? or just integrate them in the terran
Javier162 i am sorry i don't now what Do you plan to return to some pony or be equetre a zerg? or just integrate them in the terran.
mien you mite have to explain it to me.
one or more ponies will become part of the swarm ... or deliver them to them Terran technology to help the raiders ... ahem: Twi get a ghost costume and capabilities ... Fluttershy becomes an Broodmother
Moar....
no esta mal , buena idea de seguir como base la historia original . pero debes de recordar que cuando pones una persona en una historia ya conocida cambia las cosas no hagas que sigan la linea al pie de la letra eso te podrán problemas y bloque de escritor ,no dudo que tienes una idea de lo que quieres y espero leerlo pronto ,solo no te detengas cuando llegue la inspiración , juega starcraft cuando necesites apoyo pero no trates de ajustarlo al juego solo de apoyo xD
en espera de mas
8223821 in English please
I am sorry, but you seem to have no understanding of the history of Starcraft and Starcraft II. And you are in dire need of the proper lore.
>It was Sons of Korhal.
>You skip over an entire campaign and state that Kerrigan disappeared on Mar Sara when it is Tarsonis.
>You skip over the fact that Kerrigan is alive but is corrupted by the Zerg. PINKIE PIE, WHAT THE F*** ARE YOU DOING HERE?
Oh well she got them right. These examples are blatant disregards for the lore of the Starcraft universe, and that could lead to people who would otherwise read this story further when you keep going. I will continue to read, and if you mix up more lore that I happen to notice, I will be happy to point it out so that you can attract more readers.
8223937
Using Google Translate erias velam said, in Spanish,
8224392
i thank you for your Thoth on the chapter and will love all the help i can get.
8224534
You're welcome.
I started following you so I can keep up to date on potential updates to the story easier.
plz moar!
A fair decent start with a rather good flow and pace, and a nice cliffhanger at the end. Spotted some errors here and there--some recurring in direct speech, but it wasn't enough to make me stop reading.
hay do continue it
Cool
Quotation marks exist for a reason, especially when writing dialog, as such being proper grammar. Please use them, using bold and italics for dialog is needless and confusing. I legitimately can think of zero reason to not use proper quotation marks.
Yeah, sorry but I can't bring myself to continue reading this.
This needs quite a lot of work before I even think about giving it another shot, to be completely honest. As it is, it's just painful to read.
en espera
11621589
Don’t worry with the help of my editor everything will be fixed right now my editor is working on the second chapter. Once he’s done with that I’ll have him look over this chapter and fixed up any grammar problems. Thank you for your thoughts they help me become a better writer.
11621738
I have no idea how to read what you sent me
11624975
Cool, sorry if I came off as a bit harsh, I tend to not sugar coat things when I speak. Looking forward to it, there is surprisingly little starcraft mlp crossovers...... heck I'm pretty sure this is the only one I've found so far lol
Personally I think you best do a recording of the game season, than make a chapter out of it.
I see at least one Starcraft story bring written from the first game until the Saga ended.