Awkward Conversations And Other Stories

by No one is home

Madame Alias' Fantastic Pandemonium of Wonders (Zap, Diane, and Glenda): Love On The Midway

Opening theme music is a thing when I want it to be.

“Come-one! Come all!” the buzzy little changeling barker pronounced to the passing crowd, “Come see what the fates hold for you! Love? Wealth? Disaster? Only Ba’al Zebul Master of the mystic arts knows for sure!”

“Let’s get our fortunes told!” Zap danced excitedly.

“Oh please,” Glenda rolled her eyes, “You would go straight for the little foal’s stuff! Everypony knows fortune telling is a sham!”

“I don’t know…” Diane said shyly, “I went to a fortune teller once… he’s kinda how I found my mom and my sister…”

“See,” Zap argued, “Diane want’s to go, and that’s why we’re here right? So Diane can have fun?”

“Fine,” Glenda rolled her eyes and huffed, “But you’re paying.”

“I’m paying for everything, Glenda,” the unicorn colt reminded his friend in annoyance.

“Well, you wanna take two dates, you better have the bit’s for it,” Glenda grinned, drawing a deep blush from Zap as the three approached the line.

“Five bits each,” the changeling at the entrance buzzed, then grinned at the three, “But I’ll let you in for twelve, just don’t tell the boss.”

“T-thanks,” Zap stammered as he paid the attendant.

Zap and Diane entered the tent the tent nervously. Glenda followed, full of bravado. They were greeted by a large zebra with an oily smile perched over a glowing crystal ball.

“Well, now, what have we here?” the zebra’s sing-song accent rang clearly through the incense smoke, “A schoolyard love triangle perhaps?”

“Hey!” Glenda protested, “Don’t get weird, I’m just doing this for my friends!”

“Ah, a non-believer, we shall see what you think when you leave my tent,” the Zebra gave a crafty grin, then turned to Diane, “And what of you little one? Do you believe in the art of divination?”

“Is it anything like tarot cards?” the little changeling asked, innocently, “Because I had a reading from the blind goat once…”

“The son of Baphomet?!?!” the Zebra’s voice took an edge of agitation, perhaps even fear, “He is here? In this city?!?! This show is closed… for maintenance!”

As the zebra moved to leave Zap protested, “Hey I paid my bits!”

“Fine,” the zebra rolled his eyes in a huff, “The griffon has a crush on the unicorn. The unicorn has a crush on the changeling. The changeling has a crush on a ghost. Deal. With. It. You stupid brats!”

With that Ba’al Zebul was gone in a huff and the changeling attendant rushed the trio towards the exit. Once outside the Glenda gave Zap a rough shove.

“I told you it was a waste of time,” the griffon rolled her eyes, “He was a total fake! You should demand you bit’s back. I’ve never seen such a rip-off! I mean, sure he called that you were sweet on Diane, but anypony could see that!”

“What about what he said about…” Zap started only to be quickly cut off.

“Zip it Zap!” Glenda snapped, then turned to Diane, “Is it true that you’ve seen the goat?”

“Well, just once…” Diane admitted.

“‘Just once’, she says,” Glenda laughed out loud, “Like anyone ever goes back to the goat for seconds! I can’t believe you! How can anypony be so cool, and so casual about it! You see Zap, this is why I gotta keep you away from Diane, she’s just way too cool for you.”

“Yeah, I’m sure that’s the reason,” Zap griped, only to catch the back of a talon to the mouth, “Hey! What’s that for?!”

“For stupidity,” Glenda stomped off.

“You really are dense, Zap,” Diane rolled her eyes and followed the griffon, leaving Zap to catch up in confusion.

As they progressed down the midway a sweet scent assailed their young snouts, followed of course by the voice of the eager vender, “Welcome everypony! Have we got a treat for you here at Sugar Hoof’s Sweet Surprise Shoppe! Once you taste our sweets you’ll never get enough! You’ll wonder why you ever settled for anything else! And remember everypony, here at Sugar Hoof’s Sweet Surprise Shoppe, the secret ingredient is love!”

“Hey, Zap!” Diane pulled the unicorn aside, “Maybe you should get some candy for Glenda. You know, to make up for before.”

“What do you mean?” the dense colt asked in confusion.

“Jeezac of prozation,” Diane said, mimicking her late uncle’s favorite swear, “Do I have to spell it out for you? Go buy Glenda some sweets, before you totally blow it!”

She pushed the unicorn towards the candy stall, and ran to catch up to her angry griffon friend, “Hey, Glenda, wait up!”

“Leave me alone Diane!” the young griffoness sulked, “Haven’t you done enough already?”

“Glenda, you know I’m not trying to take Zap, right,” the hurt in Diane’s voice silenced any angry reply Glenda had in mind, “Even if I did like him that way, and I don’t, but even if I did, I wouldn’t do that to you. You know that right?”

“I know,” Glenda walked to a bench and sat down, “It’s not your fault, heck, it’s not even Zap’s. How stupid do you have to be when you constantly tell someone how lame the are to show how much you like them?”

“It’s not that bad,” Diane giggled, “And Zap IS pretty dense.”

They both laughed as Zap returned with a box of assorted sweets, “Hey Glenda, I’m sorry about earlier. I guess I really put my hoof in mouth. I- well you know what a doofus I am…”

“I’m not even sure why I put up with you sometimes,” Glenda smiled as she popped one of the sweets into her beak, “Ack, why do I always pick raspberry first?”

“You don’t like raspberry?” Diane asked in confusion, tasting the waves of emotion roiling from her friend as she quickly downed three more of the bitesized treats.

“Can’t stand raspberry,” Glenda complained as the continued to tear through the candies, “Mmmm, I can’t stop eating these things. You know, I really think I love these candies.”

“Yeah,” Diane looked sideways at her friend.

“No, I mean, I really LOVE these candies!” Glenda said with enthusiasm.

“Yeah, I know. Changeling remember?” Diane raised an eyebrow at the amount of love pouring out of her friend, “Come on, let's go find something else to do before Glenda starts getting weird with the box of candies…”

“Hey!” Glenda protested, as she finished the box and hurried to catch up. She noticed happily that Indigo Zap had fallen in place beside her, allowing Diane to lead the group down the Midway to their next adventure.

Author's Note:

Glenda-Zap shipping intensifies. The Zap-and-Diane ship was sadly lost at sea with all on board.

I'm sure it's perfectly normal to start radiating pure love when you bite into your worst flavor of candy. 100% sure there's nothing to be concerned about...

Comments

[Not so New Brony]

Zap and Diane entered the tent the tent nervously

Extra words

eager vender

vendor

And here comes the love drug. guess they intend to get the whole city addicted to the stuff though I suspect it's a red herring for what the real plot is...or is it?

[Daremo]

entranced buzzed - entrance buzzed
sing song - sing-song
school yard - schoolyard
rip off - rip-off
vender - vendor
bite sized - bite-sized
rasberry - raspberry

*****

Seems mostly harmless at the moment, but I figure that's only because the circus hasn't made a move to start the evil quite yet.

[No one is home]

7308410 Typos have been led into a dark corner by smiling clowns...

[Daremo]

7309334
Darn, now I feel bad for them.

[Boulder]

Zap and Diane entered the tent the tent nervously.

How many tents they enter?

As they progressed down the midway a sweet scent assailed their young snouts, followed of course by the voice of the eager vender,

'vendor' I'm concerned these were pointed out by Not so New Brony already.

How stupid do you have to be when you constantly tell someone how lame the are to show how much you like them?”

they