Will the Circle Be Unbroken?

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This story is a sequel to Man of Constant Sorrow

Starlight removes an unwanted cutie mark.

Written for the Writer's Training Grounds '15 #2.

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Comments ( 11 )

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FanOfMostEverything

FanOfMostEverything #1 · May 15th, 2015 · · ·

There's a better home awaiting in the sky, Lord, in the sky...

Well, on the rock farm, actually. Still, it goes to show that Starlight can do some good in the world... though I imagine Trouble Shoes won't be as happy when she equalizes somepony who isn't as strong as he is. Lowest common denominator and all.

A nice twist on a happily ever after that remains twisted at the end. Thank you for it.

nightwalker

nightwalker #2 · May 15th, 2015 · · ·

Nice adaptation of this concept. Good job keeping the flow with the original. Might have been just me but the dialog seemed less stilted and less morose after losing his mark. Well done overall.

Nightcall

Nightcall #3 · May 16th, 2015 · · ·

By reading the title, I have a sudden urge to play Bioshock Infinite... Anywho, good story, original and sad.

berrytone

berrytone #4 · May 16th, 2015 · 1 · ·

I liked this a lot. Like the first story you really captured his voice in the writing. This was good. I dont know if you plan to continue writing more trouble shoes stories, but I'd keep reading them if you do.

howard035

howard035 #5 · May 16th, 2015 · · ·

This feels like it fits Troubleshoes a lot more than being a clown. Well done.

CCC

CCC #6 · May 17th, 2015 · · ·

Wow. Really nice. Well-written. A great sequel to Man of Constant Sorrow, as well.

Dawn Flower

Dawn Flower #7 · May 17th, 2015 · · ·

5981097
Actually, being equalized only them weaker or slower because there were others who also had the equals cutie mark, and that makes it so that no one is better then anyone else at anything. Applejack couldn't buck down the door because there were also foals in the village who also had the equals cutie mark, so she wasn't any stronger than a foal. If Trouble Shoes is the only one at the moment with the equal mark, then he hasn't been affected by it in any way yet, aside from losing his main talent.

FanOfMostEverything

FanOfMostEverything #8 · May 17th, 2015 · · ·

5987805
Yes, I know. As I said, lowest common denominator.

HoofBitingActionOverload

HoofBitingActionOverload #9 · Jun 12th, 2015 · · ·

I think you should very strongly consider continuing this series. I thought the first story established a really strong voice for Trouble Shoes, but lacked a solid story to anchor that voice to. This one has that same excellent voice, but with a really clever plot to go with it. I haven't seen this angle on Starlight's magic before, that there might be ponies who don't want their cutie marks and who could be helped by her magic. I'd love to see the idea and the implied escalation as Trouble Shoes serves as a kind of character testimony for Starlight's powers explored further.

A Hoof-ful of Dust

A Hoof-ful of Dust #10 · Jun 13th, 2015 · · ·

6086072
I had considered a third part, if I could work it into one of the prompts (if EQD doesn't just forget about their weekly writing thing, which they might); Starlight seemed like she's going to show up again, so it felt right to leave the ending of this open for continuation. She's an interesting villain in that she's ideologically opposed to Twilight and co. but her philosophy (if not her exact implementation) is worth exploring. Obviously we're meant to celebrate difference and show that friendship is the ultimate glue to a society and everything, but nobody being unfairly advantaged or disadvantaged is a noble goal too, isn't it?

cowbrony93