Fuzzy Fluffy Fables

by Fuzzyfurvert

70. Celestia is Coming

Celestia
Celestia
6 foot 8 is the bestia
Students beware
Students beware
She's coming
She's coming
She's coming

Let me lay it on line she had two on the vine
I mean two sets of tits so divine
On a horse made of nightmares she patrolled the land
With her Mason ring and phoenix in her perfect hands

Here comes Tia in control
Women dug her muff and her gallant stroll
Ate students brains and invented cocaine
She's coming
She's coming
She's coming

Celestia
Celestia
Six foot twenty fucking killing the restia
Part part Canterlot
She's coming
She's coming
She's coming

Sue me if I go to fast but the moms of her students wish she was their dad
Got a hip for her hips got a brain for her heart
She'll kick you apart
She'll kick you apart

She'll teach children but not the Beanis children
She'll teach children but not the Beanis children
She'll teach children but not the Beanis children
She'll teach children but not the Beanis children

She had a pocket full of horses fucked the shit out of bears
She threw a knife into heaven
And could kill with a stare
She made love like an eagle falling out of the sky
Imprisoned her sister and she never said why

Celestia
Celestia
Twelve stories high made of sextia
The present beware
The future beware
She's coming
She's coming
She's coming

Did I mention her four nuts
Well she also had four dicks
If you took off her boots you'd see the dicks growing off her feet
I heard that motherfucker had like thirty goddamn dicks
I heard she once held the hand of one of her student's dad's hand in a jar of acid at a party

Author's Note:

Old memes give me life in these troubled times.

This is official Beanis canon.

Comments

[FanOfMostEverything]

Silence reigned for minutes as the rest of Beanis Inc. looked on in a blend of shock, disgust, and awe. Finally, Sunset broke the lull. "Pinkie, your rapping privileges are revoked."

"Forever," said Twilight.

"Yeah, Celestia doesn't even have one dick." All eyes turned to Dash. "What? She doesn't."

[lillytheomegawolf]

well.. whatever i was expecting.. it sure wasn't that.

[PresentPerfect]

9162113
This.