So...you don't wanna do me?

by Dr Atlas

Just stay at the farm

Nothing

That’s all there was...Nothing.

Nothing but an empty field surrounded by a fence with a barn out in the distance and trees that were even farther. Mac could only stand and stare in amazement.

He looked back and forth, still unable to comprehend what he was seeing. “B-But how?” He thought. “Why is it so empty, I expected at least ten mares waitin’ for me with their tails in the air, seein’ as how it’s the middle of the month and they’re probably gettin’ desperate.” He took his first step on the porch, flinching as it creaked. “Ah hope no one heard-”

*BARK BARK*

Big Mac jumped and hit the back of his head on the wall. “Ugh...what in-Winona!” Big Mac looked over and glared at the tail wagging dog. “Shush, girl, you want every mare in the town commin’ here!”

Winona only barked again in response, forcing Mac to flinch and look around more. When he saw no eye or tail of a mare, he stepped over to Winona, going nose to nose with the canine. “Winona, I know for a fact you ain’t feelin’ the heat every since we got ya fixed, so I don’t wanna hear any of it, alright?”

She then sneezed, making him back up and wipe the snot off him. He grumbled to himself and made his way off the porch.

He took his first step on the grass, still keeping his eyes peeled for any sign of mares. “Just keep calm, Mac. You’ve made it this far.” He looked ahead, seeing the barn. “Alright, just slowly make your way...and...with every...little step…”

*BARK*

Mac then went into high gear and ran at the barn with full speed, smacking into the red wall seconds latter. He rapidly shook his head and ran to the barn doors, flinging them open and quickly dashing inside. He then shut the doors and slammed a plank of wood in between the handles, making sure it wouldn’t open.

He backed away and slumped on a support beam. “It’s okay Mac. You’re safe...a-ain’t no mare gonna know you’re in here…” Mac knew that was a lie. He was sure some mares outside saw him, and any minute now they would be banging on the doors, trying to get in.

Minutes passed before he stood back up, surprised that it was still quiet. “Wha ain’t they bangin’ in, I thought for sure they would...w-wait…”

Big Mac slowly turned around and looked at some of the stacks of hay that he had to organize. He gulped and realized how much danger he was in. “This ain’t good, they’re probably in here right now, waitin’ to strike, and they’re probably outside too, just to make sure I won’t git away.” Mac hugged the support beam and trembled in fear. He scanned the entire room to look for a hiding place, but everywhere he looked, he was sure a mare would be.

“Uh...h-hello…” He squeaked out. He then fell to the floor and shielded his face from anything that might come his way. Mac raised one hoof and looked around the room again, “Still no mane or tail of one?” Mac was sure that would get their attention, just one word would drive a mare right to him. “Maybe they’re just teasin’...Ah know mares do that from time to time.” He shivered, remembering things he’d rather not think of.

Then Big Mac’s ear twitched, making him yelp and dash under a nearby tool table. “N-No...n-n-not now, f-for Celestia’s sake it’s only been five minutes!” He knew for a fact he heard something, ear’s don’t twitch without a reason. “I-It’s had to be the wind...y-yeah, wind! In a barn that has it’s doors shut!” He silently grumbled to himself and, with some courage in him, he stood up from under the tool table and looked around the room again.

“Still the same?” He thought. “Oh, wait. I know what they’re doin’. They’re waitin’ for me to come to them! Well, it ain’t gonna work.” He then took a step forward toward a haystack, which then led to another step, then another, then another, then ano-

“HOOVES! Will ya quit movin!” He clamped his mouth shut with said hooves. “D-did I say that outloud...s-since when was I this talkative?” He then looked down to see he was now in front of a haystack. His imagination went wild and thoughts of horrible things popping out of this pile of hay coursed through his brain.

“J-just one pile, Mac...just one, then you can move on to do...even more dangerous duties.” He knew he still had to harvest apples and till the fields, and both jobs were equally as dangerous. He ignored the future and focused what was happening to him right now. Just one pile…” He thought to himself

He slowly raised his front leg and reached into the hay, closing his eyes and looking away while doing so, he was certain he would be touching something that wasn’t even close to feeling like hay. The further he reached in, the more his heart rate and adrenaline when up, “J-Just grab a stray, Mac...not a bale...I said a STRAW Mac! NOT A-”

*SQUEAK*

Mac’s eyes went wide once he heard that noise. He then turned to the hay stack again, his hoof still in it. “No…” He wanted to pull out, but he could still feel it, it wasn’t hay, it wasn’t hair, it wasn’t a squeak toy. He could feel exactly what it was and, for some strange reason, he pressed harder, making the same noise.

Seconds later, the hay stack exploded and straws of hay went everywhere, one of them landing in Mac’s mouth. Mac backed away and shielded his face. Once everything settled he lowered his hooves and looked forward, wishing he didn’t.

Right in front of him stood an all too familiar looking pony, the one that divided bombed him from the clouds years ago, the one that tackled him to the ground when he was getting apples, the one that relieved him of his dignity in under ten seconds...it was...

“R-Rainbo-”

“HEY!” The spectrum haired pegasus yelled. “Quit poking my flank and find your own...hiding...spot.”

The two of them stared straight into each other's eyes, the only movement was Dash’s wings that were keeping her in the air and the only sound was Mac’s heavy breathing. After minutes of silence, Big Mac decided to break it the only way he could.

“AHH!” He screamed

“AAAHHH!” Dash yelled back.

“AHHAH!”

“EAH!”

“GEAH!”

“AAAAAAAAAAAAAH!”

“AAAAH!”

“EAAAAAAAH!

“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!”

“AAHUH!”

“EUUUAHH!”

"BWAAAHAA!"

“AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!” Rainbow Dash ended it by flying away, faceplanting right into the support beam Mac was holding earlier. She slumped to the ground and groaned in pain.

Mac darted his eyes around in hopes to find an exit. He looked past Dash to see the doors. “Got no other option.” He dragged his hoof across the ground like a bull and ran toward the doors head first, intent on smashing them op-

*SMACK*

Big Mac then tumbled backwards and landed into the support beam again, smacking Dash into a wall. Mac turned to his side and realized what will happen next. “This is it, this is where I get violated. I didn’t even make it out of my property…” He sighed and laid on his back again, figuring it wouldn’t even be worth getting up. “Alright mares,” He said. “what are ya gonna...huh?”

Mac craned his head up to see what looked nothing like a mare, in fact, it wasn’t a mare at all. It was a light blue stallion with lidded green eyes and a rose in his mouth.

“Oh Dashie~” The light blue stallion said as seductively as possible.

Rainbow Dash gasped and flew into the air. “Get away from me, Soarin’” She glared at him, but still had fear in her voice.

Soarin’ slowly flew up to her and dropped the rose into his hoof. “Aw, come on Dashie, I just wanna spend some time with you.” He extended it toward her and raised his eyebrows twice. "You know, as coltfriend and mare-"

Without another word, Dash flew past him, out the door, and soared up into the sky. Soarin’ bit the rose and sat beside Big Mac, who was still laying on the ground. “Don’t you just love it when they play hard to get.” He sighed.

Big Mac raised an eye. “Uh...what?”

Soarin’ nudged him. “Come on, big guy, I’m sure you’re still trying to find a mare, right?”

“Uh…what?”

Soarin’ laughed. “Crazy guy. Hey! Thanks for finding her for me, by the way. The yell is pretty easy to hear, and it gets really hard to find her when you can’t see that trail of rainbows she leaves behind, am I right?”

“Uh…what?”

Soarin’ started making his way outside. “Welp, better get going, this heat ain’t gonna get rid of itself.” He nodded toward Big Mac and few into the sky, leaving the red stallion with a straw of hay hanging out of his mouth and an expression of bewilderment, and the only thing he could say was...

“Uh...w-what?”

Author's Note:

What?

Comments

[GeneralLiberator]

A world where roles are reversed? And males experience a state where they are uncontrollably horny?
........
...So...a normal world then?

[SageBrony07]

I"m loss. What just happened?

[Lionblaze103]

5866337 I don't think that's quite it. I think it's that a lot of stallions probably want to take advantage of the heat and get in some one night stands.

[Iron Comet]

The stallions are in heat and not the mares. I sense Discords hand in this.

[tranhdxrbntd]

when is this updating?

[OmniFox]

Maybe he should find Cheerilee.

[JT_Wri]

I'm so confused, what just happened?

[tsaukpaetra]

Lol