Better Than Visions of Sugar Plums
Main Cast: Dawn Shimmer, Dusk Shine, Dashing Drake, Usagi Pie, Dragonslayer Sparkle, Strawberry Sparkle, CAL Sparkle, Iyokan Apple, Sunny Supreme
Cameos: Princess Luna, Gem, Erebus Lunæ, Circe Lunæ, Naoto Sparkle, Kirby Grainsborough, Golden Gauntlets, Pax Wanderer, Lollipop Sorbet, Gem, Raspberry Souffle
Original Start Date: December 15, 2014
The Sparkle family trots home after the yearly Hearths Warming pageant. Their youngest daughter, a red unicorn with green and dark red hair, Cal, rests on her father's back. Their older daughter, a navy unicorn with blue hair, Naoto, has returned from Neighpon for a visit. She chats with her younger brother, a sea green unicorn with a pink mane containing dark blue stripes, Cupcake, about her experience.
Cal yawns and stretches. “Daddy, why do you always play Clover the Clever?”
Starlight smiles. “Because I get to wear pretty dresses.”
Apple Bloom laughs. “No t' mention, his ma, yer gran'ma, used t' play her too.”
“Its mostly the dresses,” her husband confirms. “It is always fun to wear a dress.” He nudges Naoto. “Right?”
The young mare rolls her eyes and pulls her hat down. “I'd prefer you didn't assign your gender roles to me.”
Her father laughs. “I'll wear enough pretty dresses for all my kids. Though I would love it if you played Clover at least once. Give me a chance to play Princess Platinum.” He sighs. “The prettiest dresses.”
“I'm sure Aunt Razzly would love that,” Cupcake laughs.
His mother laughs too. “Jus' thinkin' 'bout the first time yer pa cast the pageant, and he got Satsuma t' be in it without tellin' 'im his role. Yer uncle was so worried he was gonna be Chancellor Puddin'head and so happy t' be Smart Cookie.”
Starlight snorts, “Like he could be any other role. Do you think I am really that type of big brother to embarrass my little brother like that?”
“Yes,” his whole family replies.
Starlight laughs. “Yeah. That's true.”
The family reaches their homestead in Sweet Apple Acres. The eldest son, an amber unicorn with yellow and lime green hair, Jirard, waits outside, playing with the family dog, Winona 2. He looks up and smiles as everyone approaches.
“Sorry I split up earlier,” Starlight's eldest son apologizes. “I just wanted to check with Aunt AJ what the chore schedule was like for the next few days.”
“Jus' plowin' the snow would be good enough fer me,” his mother replies.
“I know. I just wanted to make sure.”
Cal lets out a big, loud yawn.
“Sounds like somepony is ready for bed,” her father jokes.
“I'm fine, daddy. Really.”
Apple Bloom lifts her daughter. “Its gettin' late. Ya should all get t' bed.”
Their older foals groan.
“If you don't get to bed now, Santa Pony may not show up,” their father teases.
“You mean grandpa?” Jirard asks.
“He is not your grandfather,” Starlight argues. “Mom would never let him grow a beard.”
“My theory is that he uses the time vortex to grow a beard then shaves before grandma can find out,” Naoto deduces.
“Dad wouldn't abuse time travel like that! ... Often!”
“Dawn thinks Santa Pony is a nonlinear being that has access to faster-than-light technology and a containment vessel that has exotic geometries,” Cupcake says, playing with Winona 2. “So, basically grandpa.”
Starlight growls at his son.
“Why else would we leave out offerings of brownies and root beer instead of milk and cookies?” Cal adds.
Their father takes a deep breath then marches into the house. “That's it! I'm taking back all your presents!” He even kicks a back hoof, rustling his dress a little.
His children yell and plead with him as they follow him inside. Apple Bloom laughs and carries Cal in with her.
“I don't wanna go to bed,” Dawn, a bright yellow unicorn filly with hair the color of sunshine, screams, fighting to break free of the magic holding her. “I wanna stay up and see Santa Pony and go on adventures with him, destroying alien threats from our top secret moon base!”
Sunset laughs at her daughter's imagination. “But Santa Pony only comes once every good little foal is asleep.”
Dawn stops struggling, frowning. “Then what does it matter if I'm still up?”
Sunset tucks her daughter in and kisses her forehead. “Because you're the best filly any parent could hope for.”
The young unicorn sighs and curls up. “Goodnight, mom.” She looks at the cracked bedroom door. “Night, dad!”
“Night!” Technis shouts back.
Sunset goes to the door. “Goodnight. Get lots of sleep. You don't want to be tired when we visit the family in the morning. You know how much Dusk and your grandfather like seeing you.”
“I will, mommy,” Dawn replies.
The filly is out like a light before her mother closes the door. Sunset breathes a sigh of relief. She trots through the house to find her husband, catching him in the kitchen. Technis quickly slams the refrigerator door and wipes his face.
“I wasn't drinking nog straight from the carton!” the stallion denies.
Sunset magically opens the refrigerator, levitates the carton of eggnog and drinks from it. “Good.”
The two unicorns laugh.
“Is she finally asleep?” Technis asks.
Sunset looks back toward her daughter's room. “Yeah, but she is getting stronger. We might need both our magic to contain her soon.”
“She'll be fine,” her husband assures. He heads to the door. “I'll contact dad. Tell him that we're ready for "Santa" to come by.”
“And I'll let Aunt Luna know Dawn is ready for her too.”
“Oh yeah. That is this year too.”
Sunset sighs. “I know... Poor girl...”
Technis grins. “Don't worry. Luna can take care of herself. ”
The unicorns laugh again and start making their calls.
Princess Luna trots through the halls of Canterlot Castle with her son. The princess is smiling and in a good mood, but Helios looks upset.
“Are you sure this is a good idea?” the unicorn worries. “I know you like giving foals holiday dreams, you did on my world as well, but this selection of foals seems dangerous.”
Luna looks at her son. “My two grandchildren are on the list. Are you saying Erebus and Circe are dangerous?”
“Um, no, but they are probably the only sane ones.”
The princess sighs. “I have gotten to know all of your father's grandchildren as best I can. Some are a little... spirited, but they are good foals.”
“You were at the Hearths Warming pageant at Aunt Celestia's school. Dawn attacked one of the foals playing a wendigo.”
“She was just getting into character.”
“She was playing Clover the Clever. The nerdy archmage.”
“Who was also a student of Star Swirl, thus she can take care of herself.”
Helios takes a deep breath. “I just hope you know what you are getting in to.”
Luna nods. “Director Heartstrings has provided me with detailed intel on all of them. I believe I have tailored dreams to their liking.”
Helios stops and looks down. “You said that to me before my dream. I ended up being attacked by a raptor.”
His mother looks back and gives him a concerned looked. “I assure you that would not have happened if I, this Luna before you, were the one to have put on the show. Your children are safe with me.”
Helios takes a deep breath and nods. “And if they aren't, we'll give you hell when we see you in the morning.” He gives his mother a kiss on the cheek. “See you in the morning.”
Helios teleports away to be with his family. Luna continues to her chambers to finish preparing for the night. A pair of bat pony Lunar Guards wait outside of the room. One, a purplish-grey male, sleeps standing up. The other, a yellowish-grey female, stands at attention.
“At ease,” Luna says, rolling her eyes.
The female bat pony glances at the princess then returns to her watch.
Luna facehoofs. “It is Hearths Warming Eve. Shouldn't you take the day off?”
The bat pony sighs heavily and slumps over for a second.
“Just because you're the commander of the local garrison and everypony else took the day off, doesn't mean you have to stand guard with your brother.”
The bat pony looks at Luna and groans.
“I order you to take the rest of the holiday off,” the princess commands.
The bat pony lets out a combination exasperated groan and defeated sigh. She hits her brother to wake him and drags him away.
The newly awakened bat pony looks around confused. “Are we finally free?” He looks back. “Bye, Princess Luna! Have a great Hearths Warming!”
“Say ‘hi’ to Fluttershy for me!” Luna watches them leave. She shakes her head as she enters her room. “That filly needs to get laid.”
Leaving that comment to sit there, Luna makes her way to her meditation chamber. She magically lights several candles and activates some spells she set up around the room. The princess takes a seat in the center of the room and begins casting her dreamwalking magic.
Dashing Drake, a light purple young pegasus stallion with a monochrome mane, moans as he sits up. The half-asleep pegasus yawns and rubs his eyes.
“Feels like I just went to sleep.”
“You probably did.”
Dashing jumps at the sound of a second voice. He looks around. Instead of his room back in Ponyville, he appears to be in the back of a limousine. The interior is lined with blue, velvety material. The driver looks back. Dashing instantly recognizes him.
“Hey, Jirard,” the older pony greets. “I thought you'd be sticking your big nose in here.”
His nephew laughs. “Fate may have brought us together, but I believe we were brought here by an outside force.”
“What do you mean?”
Jirard taps his horn. “I'm pretty sure this is a dream. I heard my dad talking about it with Aunt AJ and Uncle Satsuma. Princess Luna must be doing this as some sort of lesson.”
Dashing leans back and looks out the window. “Guh. I hate those. Always about me staying in school to get a degree before I can become an archeologist like my mom.”
“Technically, she was a grave robber. Says so in her books.”
“Semantics. I think its... Holy crow!”
Jirard stops the limo. “What is it?”
“Nothing! Keep going. I just recognized where we're going.”
“Where's that?”
Dashing points at a large office building towering above them. A sign reading 'Nakatomi Plaza' can be seen out front. “I might be crazy, but I think this is my favorite Hearths Warming movie of all time.”
Cal and two other foals explore an empty house. Cal leads the group while a raspberry red unicorn takes in surroundings. A bronze earth pony with rusty green hair looks confused.
“So wait,” Golden Gauntlets says, “You're saying we're home alone?”
“Yes, GG,” Cal huffs. “Wherever we're at, we're all alone in this home.”
“But mom doesn't allow me (or dad) to stay at home when I'm alone,” the young colt worries. “She says I'm not responsible enough yet.”
“I don't think any of us are old enough to be home alone yet,” the filly counters.
“Then how come you're the leader when we're older than you.”
“Because shut up.”
“You know,” Raspberry Souffle speaks up, “this reminds me of a movie.”
The others look at her.
“I think it was called The Bus That Couldn't Stop.”
The others look confused.
“That's a stupid name,” GG comments.
“What was it about?” Cal asks.
“About thirty minutes too long!” GG jokes.
Raspberry rolls her eyes. “It was about a colt who was left home alone by accident while his family traveled across Equestria. He had to look after himself and... Oh dear.”
The group reaches the front door. Cal moves to open it.
“What is it?” the younger unicorn asks.
“Don't open that,” Raspberry whispers.
“Why n-”
Cal opens the door. On the other side, an undisguised changeling is waiting for them. It hisses and charges. The foals scream and slam the door. The changeling can be heard trying to break in.
Cal backs away, a spell charging on her horn. “Let me guess. That movie was made long before Aunt Del made seeing changelings an everyday thing.”
Raspberry nods and squeaks nervously.
“How did the foal survive?” She looks back at the other unicorn. Raspberry is frozen in shock. “Raspberry! How did the foal survive?”
“Wait. You know each other?” GG asks.
“M-my much older sister is married to her uncle.” Raspberry takes a breath. “We have to call the Lunar Guard and trap the house. That will hold the changelings off until help arrives.”
Cal nods. “All right. Let's get to it.”
The foals split to ready the house.
“This is one hell of a family Hearths Warming movie...” Cal grumbles.
Dawn sits at a table staring at a pile of mashed potatoes and a slice of wheatloaf. Across from her, a unicorn colt with a dark blue coat and darker blue hair has his face buried in a book. Sunset works at a stove. She finishes her plate and joins the foals at the table.
“So, Dusk, what do you want for Hearths Warming?” Sunset asks.
The colt shrugs. “Books, I guess.”
“So predictable,” Dawn grumbles, poking the potatoes.
Sunset smiles at her daughter. “And what do you want?”
Dawn jumps up. “I want a Celestia-II-class airship with Mark VII pulsed MASER anti-aircraft batteries and the latest quantum phase shielding.”
Her mother laughs kindly. “You'll put your eye out with that, dear.”
Dawn moans and bangs her head in the mashed potatoes. Dusk glances up at his cousin.
“I hate this dream,” the filly groans. “I want the other one Luna showed us. You know, the one with Commander Freya in it.”
Dusk shudders. “I think we're a little too young for that one...”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Luna escorts a group of foals through a dreamscape. Among the foals are Dusk, Dawn, Cal and their cousins. Dawn looks bored. Luna stops in front of a door.
“Do not be afraid, children,” the princess assures. “Though you may get a shock or two, these dreams are meant to entertain and enlighten. They won't harm you.” She grips the door knob with her magic. “Now, let's see what this dream has in store for us.”
Luna opens the door and looks inside. Instantly, her wings shoot up and she pales. The foals look in and scream. A loud squawk comes from the room.
“Get the buck out of here!” an angry female voice screams.
Luna slams the door. “At least she took my advice...” she mutters.
“Wh-what was that?” Raspberry nervously asks.
“It was nothing!” Luna shouts.
“Looked like the reverse cowgirl to me,” Dawn calmly replies.
“It. Was. Nothing!” the princess growls, scowling at the filly. She stands, straightens her mane and takes a breath. “Now, let's forget what we saw and move on. Shall we?”
Cupcake sulks as he trots to a dingy apartment building.
“Who the hell fires a kid on Hearths Warming Eve?” he complains. “And who gives away all their employee's money to a stranger? And why the hell did Santa Pony tell me to get a job in the first place!”
The young unicorn slams his head against the apartment wall and moans. An apartment door creaks open. Cupcake sighs and goes inside to a barren room with a letter sitting on low table. He trots over and opens the letter.
"Dear Cupcake. We'll leave the rest to you. Do your best to pay it back. Sorry... We got caught up in the excitement of gambling... But these things happen. Well, the fact is, we were in debt already so... But I'm too lazy to repay the debt by working, and Cupcake's wages are too low. Plus, we have no savings. We were at a complete loss, but after much thought, we came up with a great idea. That's it! ♥ We can sell our son! They said they can pay around this much. ♥"
Cupcake stares at the back of the letter which features a mapping of the parts of a pony to various prices. “To paraphrase Dawn... What the balls is this!”
Suddenly, there is a pounding at the door.
“Open up! We're here to collect your son!”
Cupcake thinks for a second before galloping to the window. “Nope o'clock!”
The young unicorn leaps from the window right as several 'very nice ponies' catch up to him.
“Get back here!” one of the 'very nice ponies' yells. “We need to collect your organs!”
“This is why Grandma Twilight is a better princess than Luna!” Cupcake moans as he escapes into the evening.
Luna looks over her shoulder disdainfully. She snorts and turns back to her charge, a yellow-orange earth pony with red and silver hair. “I am almost prepared for your special dream, young Iyokan,” the princess assures. “I just need to summon your fellow dream traveler for this evening.”
Iyokan sighs and looks around, adjusting his glasses. He hears somepony approach from behind. He turns to look and shouts. A young human girl wearing orange pajamas stands behind him.
“Hi,” the girl greets.
Iyokan scrambles behind Luna. “What the heck is that!”
“She is your partner for this journey,” the princess explains. “This must be how Miss Sunny Supreme views herself in her dreams.”
“Sunny?” Iyokan looks at the human. “You're my cousin Sunny?”
Sunny nods. “I am.” She looks at her body. “My dad tells me stories about humans all the time, and I dream about them every night. Is that not normal?”
Iyokan shakes his head.
“It is perfectly fine,” Luna answers. She turns and makes a door magically appear. “Now, I have a special dream in store for you. I have seen your actions and attitudes towards your parents this past year. I am most displeased.”
The youngsters groan, but otherwise show no emotions.
“So tonight, we will visit your past, present and potential future to teach you a lesson in the Hearths Warming spirit.”
“I'm only seven. What past?” Sunny huffs.
“You may be young, but your parents' experiences may inspire you.” Luna opens the door. “Come along, children.”
The children moan and follow Luna into the portal.
A group of foals gather around Dusk and his cousin. Instead of Dawn, the other pony is a dark purple unicorn with a blood red mane. She is standing next to an ice-covered steel pole.
“I double dog dare you,” Circe goads.
Dusk refuses to look up from his book. “Don't care. Reading.”
Dawn pushes her way through the other foals. “What's going on here?”
Circe snorts at her cousin. “Dusk is being a chicken-wuss and not seeing if a tongue can stick to a frozen pole, even though I triple do-”
Circe stops mid-taunt when her mouth is forced open and her tongue pulled out. She is magically dragged towards the pole. Her tongue is forced to make contact, no matter how hard she resists.
“Huh. It will stick,” Dawn comments.
Circe screams at her cousins and freeing herself.
“If you're upset about being frozen, just let it go,” her cousin quips, smirking.
Circe tries screaming louder and kicks at Dawn. A bell rings.
“Oops. Time for class.” Dawn grabs Dusk. “Come on. Before we're late.”
“Shouldn't we help her,” Dusk asks.
Dawn glances at her trapped cousin. “She'll be fine.” She pulls him again. “Hurry~~!”
The foals rush off, leaving Circe to scream and try to pry herself free.
…
A teacher escorts Circe into a classroom. The filly has a bandage on her tongue and glares at Dawn as soon as she enters. Dawn laughs at the sight of her cousin.
The teacher settles the class. “Now, I know one of you put Circe up to that. I know you might want to protect each other from punishment, but...”
“Dawn! It was Dawn!” Circe shouts.
“I'm not the bully!” Dawn yells back. “She was bullying Dusk into licking the pole. I just gave the bitch what she deserves!”
“Suck my horn, spazz!” her cousin growls.
Dawn charges at Circe. The teacher catches her before they can start fighting.
“Well,” the teacher gasps. “Both your parents are going to have to hear about this.”
The teacher drags the fillies away. Dusk looks up from his book and rolls his eyes.
…
Dawn and Circe stand outside of the principal's office. They have bars of soap in their mouths. Dusk trots up and looks at his cousins.
“Come on,” the young colt sighs. “Let's get going to the next scene.”
Circe spits out the soap. “Good. That was disgusting.” She kicks the wall. “My daddy and grandma will hear about this!” She snorts. “I'll have to speak with grandma about this dream. How dare she put me through something like this!”
Dawn sets the soap aside and goes to Dusk. “You deserved that. Besides, it is not like it was too bad.”
“You liked soap in your mouth!”
“No.” Dawn shakes her head. “I used a spell to keep it from touching my mouth. Only an idiot would actually bite it.”
“That's actually pretty clever,” Dusk comments.
Dawn smiles at her cousin. “Thanks, Dusk. You're sweet.”
Circe groans and trots past them. “Whatever. Let's just get going.”
Dashing combs over a dead diamond dog wearing body armor and carrying an semi-automatic gun and duffle bag. He finds a radio and decides to have some fun.
“To the idiot who just lost two mercs, how's it going?” the pegasus taunts.
"What? Who is this? How did you get this line?" a familiar voice replies over the radio.
Dashing grins evilly. “Mog? Is that you?”
"Dashing?!" The other pony groans. "I knew you'd ruin everything."
“This is great. I can't wait to tell Jirard that Mog is the villain.”
"Stop calling me that!" Erebus snaps. "And what do you mean 'villain'?"
“You're the bad guy breaking into the vault, genius.”
"No. I'm the good guy robbing the vault from the bad guy."
Dashing throws the duffle over his back. “Geez. For a Canterlot musician, I would have thought you'd be more cultured.”
"I am cultured. Mindless action movies aren't culture."
“And heist movies are?” Dashing checks his weapon and scans the nearby hallways.
“Hey, how cultured are cowpony movies?”
"Well, it depends on the..."
“Because Uncle Dashing is about to roundup some bad guys. Yippee-ki-yay, mother bucker.”
"Just because you're slightly older than me and your father is my gran-"
Dashing turns off the radio and flies away to hunt terrorists.
Luna leads Iyokan and Sunny through a portal. They step out into a well-lit living room. A young earth pony with a forest green coat and blue hair and a dark green young changeling with an orange chitin and long red and blue hair play beside a large holiday tree.
“Not all foals lack the Hearths Warming spirit,” Luna states. “Your cousins feel the joy within them.”
“One, technically, they are only my cousins since Lollipop is only related to me by blood,” Iyokan points out. “Two, isn't she banned from Pike's Market until she is in her teens after that time she ate her weight in sushi-grade tuna?”
The young colt is tackled in a hug. “That was mommy, silly,” the changeling says. Lollipop licks her cousin's face. “You taste like apples in dreams too!”
“I can see my sister doing that though,” Pax says, trotting over. “And just because I'm adopted, doesn't mean I'm not family. Just ask Del mommy.” He looks at Sunny and stares up at the odd form before him.
Sunny stares down at her cousin. “So how does this ignite the joy of family within us?” She reaches out and scratches behind Pax's ear.
Luna looks down at the younger foals. “Why don't you tell them what Hearth Warming means to you.”
“Presents!” Lollipop cheers, letting Iyokan up.
Luna facehoofs.
“That's not what I mean,” the changeling huffs. “Every year, mommy and mommy gives lots of toys and games to foals less fortunate than us. They get lots of help from those video game ponies too.”
“Your mothers are very sweet.” Luna turn to Pax. “What about you, young Pax?”
“I just like having a family,” the young colt moans as Sunny works her magic fingers all over his ears and mane. “If it wasn't for Del mommy, I wouldn't be with everypony. I am lucky to have you all in my life.”
Luna wipes a tear. “That was touching. Wasn't it?”
Iyokan has left to play with Lollipop. Sunny is still petting her cousin mindlessly.
Sunny sighs, “Wow. Very presents. Much family. Wow.” She looks at Luna. “Can we go now?”
Luna growls. “I don't think any other group is causing this much frustration.”
Naoto paces about a study levitating a large blue jewel around with her. Her usual cap and cardigan are replaced by a blue Inverness coat and matching deerstalker. An earth pony in a police uniform and a greyish changeling with a pink chitin and blue and silver hair watch her.
“I conclude the stone was placed in the goose by an amateur thief planning on pinning the crime on a former convict in the employ of the hotel where the theft took place,” the young detective deduces. “Furthermore, he placed the jewel in the bird assuming it had an unique identifier only he knew about. Thus, when he went to retrieve the bird, likely from a relative, he was given the wrong goose. The owner of this hat” -- she levitates a battered old hat -- “is no more guilty than you or I. You are unlikely to encounter any trouble finding the thief if you send men to investigate the local goose dispensaries.”
“Brilliant!” the officer exclaims.
“Bull crap!” the changeling counters.
Naoto looks at her companion. “Something wrong, Kirby?”
“You cheated!” Kirby accuses. “You read this story before.”
Naoto stares blankly. “Story?”
“You know... Blue carbuncle. Fetlock Holmes.”
“Who?”
The changeling's jaw drops. “You want to be a detective, but you never read Fetlock Holmes?!”
“I prefer Edogawa.”
Kirby groans and falls back into a chair.
In darkness, Cupcake skulks through a park. He keeps muttering about doing 'bad deeds'. He hears somepony nearby and hides behind a tree. He peeks out and sees a dark grey unicorn with long black hair and a red-tipped horn. She is dressed inadequately for the snowy weather. The unicorn filly is standing in front of a vending machine.
'That's it!' he thinks. 'I must turn to evil! I must kidnap her!'
Cupcake stops to ponder what he was just thinking. While he is distracted, a pair of griffins approach the filly. Cupcake snaps out of it when the filly yells.
“Hey, hey...” one of the griffins says. “You're really cute!”
“Too bad you're all alone on Hearths Warming Eve,” the other adds.
“Why don't you come with us to someplace fun?”
A griffin grabs the filly's leg.
Cupcake leaps out of hiding and punches both griffins at once. “Keep your claws off my prey!”
The griffins fly off while the young colt charges a spell on his horn.
“Th-thank you...” a kind voice says behind him. The filly smiles kindly at her savior. “I'm not sure what happened, but you saved me.”
Cupcake is not sure how to react. His evil plot is shaken by the kind reply to his brave act. The filly looks at the colt, shivering. She sneezes. Cupcake sighs and casts a spell on the filly.
“That spell...” the filly comments, “it is warm. I like it! ♥”
Cupcake looks at the filly, confused.
The filly spins around. “I feel bad that you're helping me so much. I'd like to show my appreciation.”
“Appreciation?”
“Yep, anything. Just name it! ♥”
“Anything?” Cupcake grins evilly. “Will you... go with me?”
“Huh?”
Cupcake extends his hoof. “I... want you (as a hostage).”
The filly blushes. “I- idiot! Just because Hearths Warming is for lovers, you can't just blurt it out like that... Do you even realize what you are saying?”
Cupcake looks away nonchalantly. “Of course I do! But I'm serious about this!” He turns back and closes the distance to the filly so they are face to face. “I wouldn't joke about something like this...” He stares at her intensely. “I'm betting my life on this... From the moment I laid eyes on you, I was determined to take you with me (as a hostage).”
The filly looks around nervously. She glances down. “All... All right... But in return, definitely no cheating allowed!”
Cupcake is a little surprised. “Eh? All right... Well, how about giving me your home number?”
“Okay...”
Cupcake spins around. “Okay, I'll be back soon, so wait right here!”
The colt gallops off to make his ransom. The filly watches him leave and smiles.
“I love this anime...” she mumbles.
Dusk sits at the bottom of a slide, reading. Circe cheers as she slides down and lands next to her cousin. A few seconds later, shouting and profanity are heard from above. Dawn slides down backwards. She quickly gets to her hooves and tries climbing back up.
“Don't give me that crap, you fat drunk!” the filly yells. “I know you're holding out on me! You're not even the real Santa, you disgusting, fake, incontinent piece of sh-!”
A loud explosion cuts of Dawn's rant. Ponies scream and rush about while the cousins try to figure out what is going on. Another explosion opens a hole in the ceiling, revealing numerous strange ships flying in the sky.
“Mother b-” -- another explosion cuts Dawn off -- “-ing Santa!”
“You said the b-dash-dash-dash word!” Circe gasps.
“This would never have happened if you gave me the Celestia-II-class airship with Mark VII pulsed MASER anti-aircraft batteries and the latest quantum phase shielding I asked for!”
A bright flash nearby signals the arrival of several pony-shaped cyborgs teleporting from their ships. Ponies panic and flee as the cyborgs start attacking. The cousins take cover behind the slide.
“What's going on?” Circe cries, sobbing. “What are those things?”
Dawn looks out from cover. “They look like the Cyberponies grandpa and Freya told me about.” A thought occurs. “Cyberponies? Grandpa? I'm in a Time Lord adventure just like grandpa! Follow me! Geroni-!”
Dusk catches her with his magic before she can rush off. “Wait for them to pass,” he advises. “Then we can sneak onto their ship.”
Dawn nods. “Good idea, companion.”
Dusk rolls his eyes.
“Sneak onto their ship?” Circe yells. “Are you as crazy as she is?”
“No time for your wussiness,” Dawn replies. “They're gone. Let's go. Allons-y!”
Dawn gallops from her cover. Dusk sighs and chases after her.
Circe watches them, wondering what to do. She screams and gallops after her cousins. “I hate both of you!”
Cal, Raspberry and Golden Gauntlets hide in a bedroom. Their traps only slowed down the evil changelings a little, and they are just trying to wait them out before the Lunar Guard arrive. The foals watch from under the bed as the changelings rush through the house. The movement outside of the room stops as the changelings gather.
“They found us!” Raspberry shrieks.
The changelings start pounding on the door.
“Well, they have now...” Cal sighs.
The changelings break down the door. They snarl at their prey.
Golden Gauntlets climbs from under the bed. “Don't worry. I got this.” He charges forward. “Golden!” The changelings kick him back into the bed. He picks himself up and runs forward again. “Gauntlets!”
The changelings kick the young colt back again. He collapses where he lands.
Cal groans, “gg, GG. gg...” She climbs out and moans. “Looks like it is up to a Sparkle to save the day. As always.”
Cal charges a spell and faces the changelings.
Cupcake trots from a phone booth, his plan collapsing around him. His failure to properly ask for a ransom (since he gave the ponies he called his name) after spending his last bit has broken him. He just wants to fall in the snow and stay there. Before he can put his new plan into action, somepony does it for him, trampling the poor pony into the ground. He looks up to see a pink pegasus with blonde odango hair and long twin tails and wearing a maid uniform looking down at him.
“Usagi?” the colt asks. “What are you doing here?”
The pegasus looks away. “How old do you think I am, Ichigo-kun?”
Cupcake stand. “Huh? I just thought... Is this the dream thing?”
Usagi turns her nose up. “I'm a girl too, you know.”
“Now I'm totally lost.”
A vehicle speeds past them.
“I think this is when you save her,” Usagi hints.
“Huh?”
“You know, the cute girl from earlier,” -- she covers her mouth -- “though I'm not supposed to know that part yet.”
Cupcake thinks for a second. “Her!”
“Go get her, tiger!” Usagi encourages, slapping her cousin on the rump as he gallops past.
Cupcake gallops as fast as he can. He charges a spell on his horn and teleports.
In the vehicle, the dark grey unicorn is fighting off her captors.
“Stay away from me you creeps!” she shouts. “When he gets here, you'll be in trouble!”
“Nopony is coming for you,” a gruff earth pony growls.
“Yes, he is! He's going to save me!”
There is a bright flash a distance down the road from the speeding vehicle. Cupcake glares at the foalnappers, charging a spell.
“Let her go!” the young colt bellows, casting his spell.
He catches the vehicle with his magic and rips it in half. The foalnappers fly off with the two halves of the vehicle. Their captive keeps traveling forward. Cupcake catches her in a tight embrace. Usagi calmly flies up to the scene.
Cupcake smiles at the filly in his forelegs. “Hiya.”
The filly just blushes and smiles, returning the hug.
Dashing hides behind a wall and checks the ammo in his machine gun. He checks around the wall. A dark grey unicorn with a styled brown mane stands in the middle of an open room. Thugs of various tribes, and even a griffin, stand with him.
“Come out, Dashing,” the unicorn calls. “I know you're there.”
“This ain't my first time at the rodeo,” Dashing shouts back. “Call off your goons if you want to dance with me, Mog.”
“Stop calling me that!” Erebus yells. He snorts then collects himself. “Anyway, we have someone here that might interest you.”
“Doubt it,” the pegasus says back. “The only other one here is Jirard, and he's been hiding in the garage despite being able to teleport here any time.”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Jirard sits in the limo, blasting music and rocking out. He stops and looks around, confused.
“Why do I suddenly feel insulted?”
He shrugs and resumes rocking out.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“Oh, I think you'll care about this one,” Erebus taunts.
The unicorn motions to the thugs. One drags out a light purple qilin with long blue hair. She is shoved to the center of the room with Erebus.
“Help me, Dashing!” the qilin calls. “I'll do anything for your help!” She licks her lips and smiles seductively. “And I do mean anything.”
Dashing looks out again. “Gem? Is that you?”
“You know it, lover!”
Dashing slides his gun out. He comes around the corner and pulls a pistol from between his wings. “I surrender. You win. You can have the money and the girl.” He starts leaving.
Everyone stares, confused.
“Aren't you going to try saving me?” Gem calls.
“Big nope o'clock!” Dashing shouts back.
“Dashing!”
“Hey, maybe Mog can share his horde with you.”
Erebus turns to talk with Gem, but she wraps her tail around the unicorn and throws him aside. “I am literally the girl of your dreams! And I am offering myself to you! Get back here!”
“Girl of my nightmares, more like it...” Dashing gets out his radio. “I wonder if Jirard is down to party or something...”
Gem roars and runs after Dashing, plowing through her captors. The pegasus looks back, yells and flies as fast as he can. Gem breathes fire as she chases her crush.
Erebus falls out of the holiday tree he landed in. “So, did I win?”
Luna leads Iyokan and Sunny through a foggy landscape. Sunny rides on her cousin's back.
“Those last two lessons may not have stuck,” Luna huffs, “but this one is sure to get through, even to you.” She turns and towers over the children. “Prepare to face your future if you continue down the path you're on.”
The fog clears revealing a lone pony beside a gravestone.
“Dad?” Iyokan asks.
Satsuma turns around. “Iyokan?” He looks around. “Wait. Gloomy landscape. Single grave. Luna looking scary... This must be the bad future!” He dives at Luna's hooves. “Please give me a second chance! I'll be good! I'll be a better father! I'll be a better husband! I'll... I'll be a better lover to Razzly! I'll make sure she gets twice the pleasure I do! I swear!”
Satsuma continues groveling at the princess' hooves. Luna facehoofs while the children sigh and shake their heads.
Dawn and Circe stand before a complex control panel. Dusk faces away from them, using his magic to shield them and watch the doors of the bridge of the Cyberpony's ship.
“This is hopeless!” Circe cries. “There is no way to stop them.”
Dawn's eyes dart over the panel. She starts seeing patterns. “Dusk, do you have a spare pair of glasses?”
“Just the ones on my nose,” the colt replies.
Dawn levitates the glasses. She rubs her face and removes her contacts. “Glad all of grandpa's descendants have the same prescription...” She starts doing stretches.
“What are you doing?” Circe huffs.
“The control codes are keyed to Beethooven's 5th Symphony with gradually modulating major-minor key,” Dawn explains, adjusting the glasses. “Just have to find the right starting key...” She taps a few keys and listens to the response. “Ah. There we go.”
Circe snorts, “Since when do you play piano?”
“My dad and grandma are the greatest musicians ever. And I volunteered for piano lessons, unlike Erebus.”
“Hey!”
“Now shut the buck up before I shut you up.”
Circe growls and takes a step back. Dawn takes a few deep breaths and starts playing the console like a piano. Cyberponies bust through the doors and attack. Dawn keeps playing as her cousins fight back.
Dawn wakes up in her bed. She blinks a few times as she gets her bearings. She remembers the dream she just had and smiles.
“That was a good dream.”
The filly curls up and goes back to sleep, hoping to get a few more moments of rest.
Princess Twilight's castle. Twilight and James have invited their entire extended family over for a giant Hearths Warming party. Parents gather to catch up and brag about their kids. Groups of foals gather by age and recap their dreams from the previous night. Pinkie, Rainbow and Juliet scurry about, making sure everypony is comfortable, snacking well and generally having a good time. Luna drinks a large cup of coffee, trying to recover from the dreams.
Jirard opens a gift. He holds a new video game in his hoof. “Yes!”
“Glad you like it,” his aunt Rei replies. “Usagi was telling me you wanted that one.”
Jirard hugs his aunt. “Thank you! I love it!”
“Ugh. Not so loud,” Dashing groans.
“Busy dream?” his aunt laughs.
The other pegasus nods. “Gem kept me pretty active.”
“Bow-chicka-bow-wow,” his cousin teases.
“She wishes,” Dashing huffs. He stretches a wing. “I was fleeing her so hard I fell out of bed.”
Rei laughs again. “When mommy gave me my dream, I woke up covered in sweat.”
“That intense, huh?” Jirard asks.
“Actually, it was with your aunt Inkie, and she and I...” Rei blushes. “Well, you have your cousin Usa-Pie now.”
Dashing groans and holds his head. “That would be TMI if you didn't live across the street from us...”
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Iyokan finds a quiet spot to rest. His mother is in the Crystal Empire with her family, but he is still in Ponyville with his father. He sighs as he watches his dad show Pax and Cal a slight of hoof trick he learned from Razzly.
“I miss mom,” the colt grumbles.
“You can have mine,” a voice from above offers.
Iyokan glances to to see Sunny above him. She lands and sits by him.
“Only if I can have your wings too,” he replies.
“Anything,” Sunny replies. “Just take her.”
Rainbow flies in, carrying a tray of snacks. Satsuma gathers the foals around his sister to share some candy apples. He waves his son over, but Iyokan and Sunny just shake their heads. Rainbow makes a pouting face at her daughter before returning to help her mom and sister with the party. She leaves the tray and two apples on a table. Both foals sigh.
Iyokan glances at his cousin. “Hey, you think you can show me that, uh, trick where you dream about being human.”
“That can be arranged.”
The cousins share a rare smile before going back to looking upset.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“Freya-chan!” Usagi calls, flying down a hall.
The bat pony sighs and looks back.
“So, how was the griffin ambassador last night?” the pegasus teases.
Freya grab her niece and snarls, baring her fangs. “You saw nothing. I have no feelings for him. And if you tell anypony, remember...”
“Remember, my mommy can fill you with enough electricity to light Las Pegasus for a year if you hurt me,” Usagi says, grinning.
Freya lets the pony go and storms away, muttering epithets.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
James holds Dawn on his lap while she tells him about her dream.
“... And then, and then I started blasting the Cyberponies with my magic while Circe cried like a little bitch,” Dawn excitedly relates. “And then we needed to break into the control room, but Dusk had to hotwire the door since you haven't given me a sonic yet. When can I get a sonic?”
“When you're old enough,” James laughs.
Dawn moans, “Son of a b-”
“You were just telling me how you played the piano to save the day,” her grandfather interrupts.
“Oh! Yeah! Yeah! I was so good at piano! Just like daddy!”
James smiles and keeps listening.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Luna sighs and holds her head. Circe trots away from her grandmother, grumbling. A fresh cup of coffee is set next to the princess. She looks up to see Naoto serving her.
“Doesn't takes a detective to tell you needed that,” the unicorn states.
“Thanks.” Luna sips the coffee. “Did you have fun?”
“Plenty, though Kirby kept accusing me of cheating.”
“You are your grandfather's granddaughter and he is his father's son...”
Erebus trots up. “May I talk with you about my dream last night, grandmother?”
“What was wrong with yours?” Luna groans.
“Nothing,” Erebus replies. “I just wanted to say that seeing Dashing get lit afire was the best Hearths Warming gift I could have asked for.”
Luna sighs and takes a long drink of her coffee.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Cupcake finds a couch to collapse on while he recharges. A television in front of him shows scenes from other Hearths Warming celebrations in Equestria. The current scene is from the Crystal Empire. Princess Cadance, Shining Armor and their family greet visiting dignitaries and other honored guests. Nearby, Trixie's family is next to greet the guests, though Stormy and Razzly seem more interested in catching up. At the end of the gauntlet, Prime Minister Sombra and her family meet with arrivals. Cupcake's eyes go wide and he scrambles for the remote.
“See somepony you know,” Usagi asks, flying up. “Or did you just want to see Aunt Razzly again?”
“No, it was...” -- Cupcake stops the payback on Sombra's family. “I know her...”
“Prime Minister Sombra? Since when were you in the Crystal Empire?”
“No! Her!” Cupcake points at the filly from his dream.
“Oh! You mean Daphne?” Usagi smirks. “You know, your and her characters are like a couple in the story we were in.” She spins around and trots away. “But what do I know about matters of the heart?”
Cupcake ignores his cousin as he stares at the screen. Daphne smiles at the camera before it moves on. Cupcake rewinds and plays back the smile.
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okay. just, this is going to take another few readings to properly untangle. I think I have it all, definitely enjoyed trying to spot who was who and who was in what story, but this is a rather fragmented set of stories.
overall it was an enjoyable read, and worth the wait.
5461637 Break each story up by character and you can get the general idea of each source story. They are all Christmas related if that helps.
And I tried leaving off some of the who's who so that SCS readers could guess the parents a little. At the very least, it leaves some 'guess the in between bits' to the reader.
Answers available via pm of course
you know what, nothing about this chapter matters after the character lists, it's all irrelevant because we should know it's awesome.
Descendant of best OC, nothing more needs to be said.
5461738 Damn. Forgot about that. Should have made you guess who a pink changeling named Kirby was related to. Make you catch the naming system of a certain family line. If I had thought of that, he would have been given the Daphne treatment...
5462234 to be fair, there are a few changeling characters in your series. Not many that are likely to have younglings named after kirby, but there are a few.
So basically a small parade walking down the street?
I liked the story, though I was only able to place about half the characters at any given time... Anyways, the wait was definitely worth it. Until next time,
-Sphinx
5465230 There wasn't really a Detective Conan reference. I just threw in Edogawa as an alternative to Doyle, but making sure to pick an author the readers might recognize. The A Christmas Story references were a little more obvious, but that is because I watch it every year. Although, you can search the dialogue from a couple of the scenes and find they are directly lifted from A Certain Combat Butler series.
The story is set about 18.5-19 years from SCS chapter 60. It is all determined by the age of the three oldest: Usagi, Dashing and Erebus (in that order). That is when I'm planning on announcing their conception in SCS (though I might have some hints next chapter).
I started SCS #39 today. Finally getting to some of my fun ideas again. PS: #42, 46-48 and the next Flashback are just waiting for me to get to them.