Pinkie Finds Grimmdark
Grimmdark was falling asleep in his chair. The blue light from his computer flashed in his wavering eyes. The time old motto of “SLEEP IS FOR THE WEAK” had betrayed him. Now the 30 year old man was left in terrible stupor of tiredness after a long night of creepypasta. His eyes finally started to close.
“HAY GRIMM!”
Grimm opened his eyes abruptly. He stared around his darkened apartment with only the blue computer screen for a light source. His pained eyes caught sight of a digital clock. 2:30 A.M. the little mechanical killjoy declared. Grimm yawned. I gotta get more sleep he thought. The man tried to get up from his chair when he heard it again.
“HAY I’M TALKING TO YOU!”
Grimm looked over to his computer his pants almost wetting from fear. A blue vortex had opened in his faithful PC screen. From this portal of sorts extended a hand, no wait it wasn’t a hand. It was a hoof!
Grimm sat mouth agape as a familiar pink face began to emerge from his screen. Within seconds the human was staring directly into the eyes of Pinky Pie.
“I’VE BEEN TRYING TO FIND YOU FOR AGES,” shouted the normally happy pony. The jovial mare had been replaced by a fuming pony with a seriously butt-hurt scowl. Grimm rubbed his eyes, but she was still there. Pinkie Pie was standing on his desk through a portal from his computer. The thirty year old tried to remember if he had gotten high at any point during in the night. He stroked his manly stubble before coming to the dismal conclusion that he hadn’t been high in weeks. This can’t be real, he thought as the pony glared at him in the dark room. Pinkie Pie took another step forward as the rest of her body left the computer. She stared Grimm right the eye. “YOU’VE GOT SOME EXPLAINING TO DO MISTER!”
Grimm recoiled into his seat. “HOW ARE YOU HERE?!” He yelled as loudly as he could without waking his upstairs neighbor. Pinkie stamped the table.
“I’M THE ONE HERE TO ASK THE QUESTIONS BUDDY!” Pinkie screamed as she shoved Grimm against the chair. The human started to sweat. This has gotta be dream, he thought. That was when Grimm remembered the most important aspect of a dream. You don’t feel pain. Now while Pinkie had the man pinned to his chair, Grimm made the maddened realization. Holy Crap Pinkie Pie is real!
“WAIT IS RAINBOW DASH REAL TOO?!” Grimm shouted. Pinkie growled at him.
“YOU’VE GOT NO RIGHT TO BE ASKING THAT PAL!” She screamed back.
“IS TWILIGHT REAL?!” Grimm fan-boy squealed. “WHAT ABOUT FLUTTERSHY? OH GOD I’VE GOT SO MANY QUESTIONS?!”
Pinkie shoved her hoof in his mouth. Grimm stared at the pony in confusion and a slight bit of disillusion. Pinkie’s hoof didn’t taste like sweets at all despite what over 30 different clopfics had told him. “Well I’ve only got one question for you,” Pinkie said gaining a composure never before seen. “WHY DID YOU WRITE THAT STORY?!”
“WHAT STORY?!” Grimm shouted as Pinkie removed her hoof.
“DON’T PLAY DUMB WITH ME BUDDY!” Pinkie fumed. “DOES, WHY DO THEY CALL IT A HACKSAW ANYWAY RING A FEW BELLS!?”
“Oh that story,” Grimm calmly answered. Suddenly the human had an epiphany Pinkie was really pissed. A genius observation, he thought. He once had a dream of what Pinkie would say to him as he wrote “Cupcakes” but he never thought it would come true!” Now as the pony snarled at him from his computer desk Grimm also realized that Pinkie probably didn’t take too kindly to being labeled a psychotic murderer. A psychotic party animal maybe, but a murderer no.
Pinkie got up in Grimm’s face. “DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW HARD MY LIFE HAS BEEN AFTER THAT FU&KING STORY WAS POSTED!?” Pinkie screamed at the awestruck human.
“I take it, you didn’t like the fic that much,” Grimm responded in poorly timed attempt at trolling.
Pinkie glared even harder at the human. “YOU BET YOU’RE ASS I DIDN’T LIKE THAT GORY SHIT!” Pinkie growled. Grimm tried to analyze the situation. Pinkie Pie was on his desk shoving him into his chair while giving him an epic stare down. If that didn’t sound like drugs he didn’t know what did. Pinkie noticed the confused look in his face and she backed off of him. “After that story was posted everypony started to become afraid of me?” Pinkie said in now sad voice.
The sentiments were lost on Grimm who saw the opportunity to gain once in a lifetime knowledge. “THERE’S INTERNET IN EQUESTRIA?” Grimm begged.
“OF COURSE THERE’S INTERNET!” Pinkie yelled.
Grimm rubbed his stubble again. “But we’ve never seen any of you on computers?!” He shot back.
“Well duh! Would that make for an interesting show!” Pinkie shouted. “Ponies on computers all day! Does that sound fun?!”
Grimm’s shit was flipped. “YOU KNOW YOUR’E A SHOW?!” He screamed.
Pinkie rolled her eyes in annoyance. “Geez dude,” she said bothered. “And here I thought this would be an epic showdown, but instead… ugh. Yes Hasbro pays to put up cameras in Equestria.” Grimm’s eyes widened. “BUT THEY DIDN’T SAY ANYTHING ABOUT SOME SICK FUCK ON THE INTERNET HAVING ME KILL MY BEST FRIEND!”
Grimm attempted to defend himself. “Whoa whoa whoa,” he cut in. “There’s way weirder stuff out there than Cupcakes! I mean have you ever heard of rule thirty-”
“THE PORN WAS BAD ENOUGH!” Pinkie interrupted. “BUT YOU TOOK IT WAAAAAYYYY TOO FAR AMIGO!”
Grimm was a mix of scared, awed and strangely aroused. “HOW BAD CAN IT BE?!” He yelled. “I WROTE THAT FIC LIKE A YEAR AGO!”
Pinkie closed her eyes as if she were about to brood. “Nopony talks to me anymore unless they have to. My awesome parties per year quota is in the toilet and cupcakes were banned, since nopony can stand to look at them much less eat them!”
“YOU GUYS EAT CUPCAKES ALL THE DAMN TIME!” Grimm countered trying to call bullsh*t.
“THOSE AREN’T CUPCAKES!” Pinkie screamed back. “THERE JUST MUFFINS!” She began to weep as those words came out. “All my cupcake are JUST FANCY LOOKING MUFFINS!”
Grimm was hurt, but also was still a troll at heart. “At least Derpy’s happy right?” Grimm’s troll logic was lost on Pinkie who continued to fire her death glare.
“And the worst part is,” Pinkie said wiping her tears away. “Rainbow Dash is too creeped out to play with me anymore.” Grimm felt his gore loving heart rip into two. Still how could he know his fic would cause Pinkie Pie so much trouble? His only goal was to spread butt-hurt, but hurting Pinkie's butt, that was going too far.
“Well what do you want me to do?” Grimm asked pensively. “I can’t unwrite the story! It’ll be on the Internet forever!”
Pinkie refocused. “I know that!” She answered. “What I want is an apology.”
“Seriously?” Grimm responded.
“IT’S THE LEAST YOU COULD DO!” Pinkie screamed. The pair suddenly heard pounding from the ceiling. Looks like they finally woke up Grimm’s neighbor.
“Ok geez,” Grimm said. “I’m sorry.”
Pinkie got up in the troll’s face again. “OH NO YOU DON’T!” She screamed. “I WANT A REAL APOLOGY!”
“Fine fine,” Grimm sighed. “Pinkie Pie, I’m sorry Cupcakes caused you and the MLP fandom to suffer. I just… I just couldn’t help myself.”
Pinkie stared at Grimm and for the first time all night she smiled. “Apology accepted! Hahahaha!” The pink pony danced on Grimm’s desktop greatly endangering his computer.
“WAIT!” Grimm shouted at Pinkie.
“What?” The pony answered stopping her dance.
“HOW DID YOU GET TO MY ROOM?!” The man asked with wonder.
Pinkie laughed. “Oh Grimm,” she chuckled. “Everypony’s got her secrets! Now I’ve gotta get going!” And with that Pinkie Pie jumped back into Grimm’s computer screen. The man grabbed the device only to watch the portal vanish and his normal desktop image return. Grimm momentarily pondered what the fu*k just happened. The emotionally drained troll yawned before wandering over to bed and falling face first on the pillow. Well that was crazy he thought. I should’ve asked for an autograph or something. S*it would’ve been big on EBay. Oh well time to get some damn sleep. With that the internet dweller began to enter the dream world.
Suddenly Grimm heard a loud noise. He opened his eyes and looked up. Pinkie Pie was on the ceiling wielding a katana! Grimm shat himself. “WHAT THE FUCK?!” He shouted.
“YOU REALLY THOUGHT ALL I WANTED WAS A FUCKING APOLOGY?!” Pinkie screamed as she jumped from the ceiling.
“AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!”
Grimm awoke from his bed hyperventilating in a dry sweat. He looked around his somewhat messy apartment. The pink pony was nowhere to be found. The man ran over to his computer screen to find no portal or hair from Pinkie Pie. Grimm let out a huge sigh of relief. “Man that was fucking close,” he said taking a seat at his desk. That was when Grimm noticed a file on his desktop he’d never seen before. The file was marked READ THIS NOW. Grimm scrolled over and clicked on the file. A Word document popped up on the screen.
Dear Grimm
Since you took something I loved from me, I took something you loved from you. NEVER FUCK WITH PINKIE PIE.
Not Sincerely Pinkie
Grimm wondered what the hell Pinkie could’ve taken. It was then he noticed a trail of blood from his bed leading to the chair. Grimm felt his pants and noticed a ton of blood. He freaked and ran over to his bathroom. Within moments Grimm knew what Pinkie had stolen and he was rather cross about it.
“I DON’T BELIEVE THIS SHIT!” Grimm screamed into the mirror. “THAT BITCH TOOK MY FUCKING KIDNEY!”
THE END
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Oh thank god it's just his kidney I thought
took his........well you know what I mean
Good moral there. Grimm destroyed Pinkies life (aka taking her life) while Pinkie LITERALLY took Grimms life. Clever! (Assuming the Grimm in the story, not the real one, later on died from blood loss, that is :S )
awesome story... at least that should teach anyone a lesson not to write any gore or grimdark story anyway...
LOL
she stole... his kidney... and he didn't realise... until it was mentioned. WHAT. A. MORON.
Heh. heh heh.
I jusy had a weird flashback to charlie the unicorn there.
Shame pinkie became the said "killer" in the fic (minus baking him into a cupcake) by killing grimm* thus making her a murderer great job pinkie
*or by taking his kidney which he soon probably died from due to major blood loss (as pinkie cut probs a hole in his chest)
there's a moral to this story. and that is never mess with pinkie pie
You'd better think before you mess with the Pink.
Guys? *Ugh* Guys?
AW MAN THEY TOOK MY FREAKING KIDNEY!
So this was ultimately a self-fulfilling prophecy for Pinkie Pie.
, Big Mac about "Sweet Apple Massacre" 
, Twilight about "A Ponyville Horror" 
, or Fluttershy about "Pattycakes" 
?
Pinkie Pie's not the only one, of course. How does Rainbow Dash feel about "Rainbow Factory"
charlie, you silly unicorn...
*gasp* that gave me an idea! my next story is going to be charlie the unicorn in equestria !!!!
You have entertained Doom, Doom will mercifully let you live.
Pretty poorly written but gave me a good laugh. Lol.
He deserved it
>Implying Pinkie Pie wouldn't find Cupcakes hilarious
I'd be more worried it would give her some ideas.
507284
Well, she let him live.
Straight up, and in all seriousness, I would not want to spend any time alone with the author of any of those "fan"fics. It takes someone with something seriously twisted in the head to write something like that, and the thought of having to socialize with someone like that vaguely nauseates me.
510415
No, the scary thing is that you probably wouldn't be able to spot them at all. Unless they told you about it, you'd never know what horrors sprung forth from their twisted mind, what eldritch terrors lurked in the dark recesses of their soul...oooh, recess! Weeee!
506831 So I wasn't the only one. *shiver*
Side note: Why is it always the kidney? We need those!
510946 That's what freaks me out about those guys. You could've met a new H.P Lovecraft and not know, as long as those emotions and thoughts aren't visible on the surface. And people can come up with some really messed up things if they have a reason to. (Sanity level dropped to: ... )
507284 There's a fic all about those. I could... you know... provide a link... if you... want... (He hasn't done most of those yet, but he has done SAM and some of the Rule 34s. And it includes a linebacker. Somehow. And G 3.5 is weaponized. Want a link?)
511437 Sounds interesting.
510415>>512032>>511437>>510946
You do know that most gore writers are normal people, right?
You have to be normal to understand what would freak out normal people, otherwise it doesn't work as well.
516687
Shhh, I'm trying to freak out the normals. :P
Clever girl
i dident read it but gudging by the comment i dont have to
Justice!
god pinkie that was taking it too far i mean damn he could have taken the fic down and put an apology fic up for you
Oh shoot I thought Pinkie took his....hotdog.
Phew!!
BITCH STOLE MY KIDNEY!
what about twilight and the experiments of twilight sparkle
or applebloom and harvest?
and rarity and raritiy's new dress
Contrary to my story I don't actually "hate" cupcakes and I have nothing against its author though I do think he is total troll
JUSTICE!!!
I'm surprised he hasn't commented on this. <.>
Grimm was a mix of scared, awed and strangely aroused.
all my lol's are belong to this
Oh god I never proofread this! That's what happens when you write a fic at 2 AM XD Sorry about all the spelling and grammar fuck-ups. I hope its better now
507830
Do that. Do it right now.
Of my god... it makes sense. Grimm is a unicorn, but not just any unicorn... CHARLIE THE UNICORN!
CHAAAARRLIE! CHAAAAARRLIE!
532480 the damage was already done and irreversible, even if he (somehow) could erase the fic from the internet (there is not only the original, but multiple copies, parodies etc), he still won't be able to erase it from the memories of all the ponies.
1314581 ok first wow i posted that 20 weeks ago and 2 Well even though there are more cupcakes stories does not mean he wrote them
1314597 But as I said, the damage is irreversible, kind of like severely maiming or killing someone - there is no going back. Same with the story - no pony will trust Pinkie ever again, the story is safely backed up in their memories.
(and I missed the "20 weeks" part - though it was 2 days)
1314605 nope 20 weeks ago but i would trust Pinkie and give her a great big HUG
1314622 Maybe humans are more jaded and do not react the same way as ponies did. Story like that probably burrows deeply into your mind and stays there, you have that nagging feeling that maybe, just maybe, the basement of Sugarcube Corner is like that. Especially after the episode "party of one". That's the thing about "Cupcakes" - the story is kind of in character for Pinkie - after all, a human who smiles all the time is creepy as hell, maybe Pinkies normal behavior is "on the edge" for ponies and after reading the story a lot of them went "now I get it why she acts like that all the time - she is insane, while Rainbow is not dead (meaning the story is not true), but Pinkie might completely lose it one day and try to reenact it".
And yea, when you wrote 20 weeks I checked it.
1314658 Ya i know that i was talking to one of my friends unleashedtwilight on skype onetime and he even told me cupcakes scares the living shit out of him
thank god he got his i mean after i read cupcakes i was and still can't look at cupcakes the same