IGNORE IGNORE
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Wait, I don't fancy ponies in socks, so why am I just staring (and staring) at Pinkie right now ...?
img2.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20130427122539/yogscast/images/5/56/Well_that_escalated_quickly.jpg
Maybe you should write a story about Pinkie telling her friends that she and Cheese are a couple.
4761306 A sequel to this of that? Or not a sequel? And I might but I got some stories to finish first before doing so maybe, sometime in the future
4761306 Wait no not a sequel
they're already dating I feel so dumb for forgetting 
And maybe just maybe
Have a like for the CheesePie. Oh, and maybe for the heck of it, there should be a sequel of Pinkie getting pregnant?
Your post description, could do, with fewer, commas.
Dafuq is up with all the commas?
Decided to take a look at your story. The commas thing is pretty right, and there are some other grammatical errors that could be fixed. Also, some descriptions for certain things could be changed. For example, "piles" of cum sounds like the cum is just sitting there, like it was solid or something. Using a word like "load" or "fountain" would be a more appropriate.
I liked the story though, and that's what matters. It was short and sweet, and a little sexy, too.
Overall rating: 8/10 things got hard.
awsome!
It was...Ok. the grammar was rather bad, especially during the sex scene, and it felt really rushed. Overall, it was ok, but could REALLY use a grammar check, as well as maybe changing the pacing, and being more descriptive. Overall, I give it a 5/10.
As a side note, I really do like this pairing, and wish there was more clop on them.
4941995 Yeah I agree, I am actually going to maybe... make a remake. Right now I am thinking of going through it soon. But thanks for the honest truth. It was pretty terrible, doesn't even deserve a okay. More like one star.
Hey look a good comment! I liked it.
