One-thousand years after her death, Luna is reincarnated into the body of a blind unicorn mare.
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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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Well that started some fires. If Celestia wanted out of the nobles eyes or ears she should not have done this. I wonder which gaurd will be the first to stumble upon Selina?
Haven't read a thing yet but..THAT COVER ART!
Oh Celestia, sweet, sweet, thick headed Celestia. I understand the want to care for your "sibling" close by but ripping her from the environment she has known her whole life is just plain stupid. Have fun dealing with a very distraught (probably not the right word but couldn't think of anything else) filly.
Celly... Celly... Celly...
You, my dear, are acting much too rashly for your own good. Or for the good of the supposed "New Lunar Princess". Have you stopped to consider what she wanted? That doesn't make you wise, Celly. It makes you stupid.
Cant wait for the next chapter how many months in the future!
Uh, no.
You'd be amazed how powerful a weapon just sitting on your thumb and not getting things done really is, Celestia. Them leaving actually hurts you more than them.
I believe this is more of a scripting error than any error on Celestia's part, as, judging by how she's been portrayed so far, she'd know the difference. A monarch cannot run a country alone. Anything from raising money, to building suspension bridges out of tampon strings and the hopes of Ethiopian children, isn't done on a command alone. That requires different factions, help, nobles, corporations, etc. There is bureaucracy in monarchy that Celestia, although she may command, her will is performed by others. Shit like that doesn't just appear out of the aether.
Now, given that she's under some stress herself, I'm forgiving her for the outburst; she could very well not be thinking clearly and her mouth ran away from her. I just fear that this is setting her up as the usual "I say goes" kind of Celestia that is just so unrepentantly boring and easily proven to be incorrect.
Ugh.
I will make a note on something else, however. I hate your Rainbow Dash. Not in the character sense, like she's the good kind of bad character. No, I think she's written badly.
Rainbow Dash has been an unrepentant asshole throughout the story so far. Such a thing may be forgiven if someone calls her out on it, but the scant few times that's happened has been weak and half-hearted at best. She viscous attacked Selena in an attack that was massively disproportionate to the crime itself. Yes, Selena was a thief and Rainbow had no context why, but Jesus Christ they had her in a trapped, confined space and Dash's first instinct was to put her in the hospital? She was only stopped by Twilight putting up a barrier, and even then Dash still tried to attack her. Afterwards, she was showing signs of wanting to do it again before Twilight hushed her.
The worst part is Dash stealing the McGuffin from her after Celestia herself gave it to Selena. The highest authority in the nation gave Selena something, and Dash publicly declared Selena was too untrustworthy to have it. In front of Celestia. In front of her friends. What kind of person wouldn't immediately take Dash into a locked room and chain her to to a radiator for committing that kind of disrespect?
This is why I hate this Rainbow Dash. Her only use in the story is to provoke a Kick the Dog moment followed by a Pet the Dog for Selena. She has no distinguishing character traits or motivations other than being mean to Selena. In the end, that's why I don't like her; she's something to be reacted to. She's not even a character. That may be even worse than being a bad character.
If the point was to make them feel bad for he, Dash;s outburst could have been removed in its entirety. Seeing the way she was, especially upon finding out she was blind would have been enough. It was written just fine until Dash came into play. It was a subtle and powerful moment that the one they heard so many rumors about was just a lost little girl with so little else to lose.
Let's just say I'm neither against, nor quitting the story just yet; I wouldn't have read close to 100k of a story I don't like. I just see these small things poking holes in the cracks of the story that i hope won't sink the ship. Dash being a non-entity, the court and nobles being ignored for a "just because" reason, the story's seemingly incessant need to kick Selena when it's not needed; these things are in here to provoke melodrama, not actual drama. This story is trying to make me feel things I am not actually feeling, and giving evidence that hasn't quite supported what it's aiming for. I don't see the reason for the story to hurt Selena so much other than to try and make me feel sad for her. Yeah, I did at first (she's fucking blind and her parents are dead). Yet this constant dog-piling of feels is enforcing compassion fatigue. I don't care what Dash's reasons are. i don't care why ponies are mean to her in the public square. I've already cashed in all my feels. You have to settle down and deal with some quiet moments before trying that again.
It's a shame, because there's some really cool things to like. I like characters with disabilities that aren't inherently defined by them or are written to use them almost as a crutch. I myself have a mute in one of my stories. It goes against type and it's refreshing to see new things. Selena not stumbling into things because she's blind and just reacting to them as a blind pony would is nice. I like seeing Celestia wounded as she is through the ages and the change of her relationship with Luna. I also like the way Black Spark's lingering guilt was handled (although it is somewhat decreased if it's because of some mind magic Judo Selena may or may not be throwing). There are plenty of things to like here, but I dearly hope they are not outweighed by melodrama and the need for fake feels.
If this story get update in weeks instead of months, I'll be surprised. If not.....eh. Its still a great story either way.
Oh Celestia, you're moving much to quickly, things are going to become out of control very soon, I think...
Keep going! ;)
I dreamt about this story today. It can't be a coincidence.
We bear the mark of Luna, Max.
So... Selena is moved to Canterlot, where she knows absolutely nothing about the surrounding area. Celestia wants Luna back, but that's just it, this is Selena not Luna. No matter how much she wishes it isn't so, Celestia is little more than a stranger to her... Not only that, Selena might not even want to be the Lunar Princess... What if she can't move the moon, or outright rejects her connection to it just like she rejected the idea that she is Luna reborn? What happens when she tries to slip back into her old life? It might have been absolute shit, but there's a certain comfort in doing what you know best, and Selena has been slipping through the shadows and stealing to survive since she was a child. That isn't something that you can just wave some magic at to make it go away. Celestia has basically torn her away from everything she knows... I take it back, Celestia isn't a stranger. That would be the best possible outcome because it would mean Selena hasn't formed an opinion of her yet. No, Celestia is most likely a tormentor at this point. A very powerful tormentor...
You're a god. You should become a princess of Equestria.
Nacht Der untoten
6997616
...Night of the undead?
6997622 exactly.
6997488
True. She's a Force of Nature!
Dear Celestia: You are an idiot.
6997645
Obligatory:
6997592 More like a demented version of Anastasia....
6997681 It was what I meant. I just can't get links on the phone.
Glad to see this isnt dead
than
dissapear
Why wouldn't they be? Selena is new and very malleable, she knows none of there Tricks.
Equestria was founded without you and unless every country has an Alicorn level guardian they'd be fine without you.
Apparently if your Selena it is.
That complete goes against what you just said.
How did they not earn there title if they had to work for it. It would seem like Twilight and Blueblood had it handed to them and the rest had to work for it.
Celestia that is tyranny. You don't deserve to be a princess. You can't just strip people of their power because they disagree with you.
How do Nobles work in your world? I thought they were like senators.
ITS ALIVE!
Yay! New chapter!
OhMygosh, I just binge read this entire story today and I can honestly say that this story is So GOOD.
OH It's so good! Can't wait to see more of it!
NEW CHAPTER
Binge read. Great story. Emotions ups and downs . Hope to see more!
Melodrama critique has good points but great story
6997592 iam fraid Selena will grow to increasingly hate Celestia because of all of this, because of others targeting her, celestia's "luna" treatment and her terrible life, especially if and when she finds out about her mother. The guy who is in her past lives seat is the bigot who killed her mother.
Lets not forget the father may still be alive.
YEEEEEEAAAAHHHH!!!! New chapter! *Starts partying*
I hope after you're human and you is complete,Mad Max the black will work on this story next.
7011549 The parts in winter. The feeling of lagres is strong in them.
So, my only gripe with this chapter (other than Celes ripping Selena away from her first friend ever) is that little bit where the guards are joking about the paparazzi catching Celestia flying without her regalia.
I don't think you ever explained just how her wing became non-functional, though I may have overlooked it in a "like she'd really never heal" sense but given that she IS lame....how did the one winged cakeflank get in the air?
7011752 In a carriage.
derpicdn.net/img/2013/1/19/217496/full.png
7011983 I...guess that makes sense? Although the fact that they made a big deal out of her not wearing regalia on what one could assume was a joyride and not official business....
Then again, my problem is mostly disdain for the paparazzi combined with a lack of understanding of the way they make a big deal out of almost anything. I mean really, who the fuck is Kim Cardasshian and why should I care?
Sorry for bugging you but I was wondering if you know when the next chapter will be posted
Sorry fr bugging you but do you know when the next chapter will be out
7116468 Unfortunately, no. I'm about halfway finished with it (I think), but with the end of the semester coming up, I'm focused more on school work than writing. However, this story is second on my list of things to update when summer comes around.
7116637 That is okay I understand thank you for letting me know
7116637
Are you in university or just finishing high school?
7121417 University. Haven't been in High School over five years.
7011752 it was in the first chapter. Battle wound from the fight with Nightmare Moon. edit: also, paparazzi aren't responsible for the kardashians. That's like thinking an ambulance chasing lawyer is responsible for people getting hurt. They just make their money feeding off of bad things happening, like people being reallyreallyreally stupid.
I'm a bit surprised her alicorn magic or constitution hasn't dealt with it over a thousand years, but it's also kind of refreshing to not have her be so deus ex pony overpowered as to just be instantly better like Goku after getting his head bashed through a planet by the random bad alien punk of the month.
Maybe it will turn out that she needs a long period of rest—or assistance from another alicorn—to heal completely, and seeing as Cadence is still a squeaky new alicorn and may not be able to help her that way yet, she just hasn't had the opportunity to deal with it. Yet...:)
Madmaxtheblack, this story is excellent and I eagerly await the next chapter.
In umbra Luna est brother.
7244430 I admitted as much.
i skimmed the parts where it was mentioned Celestia got hurt because, well, alicorns heal right? Pointy ponies can cast Regen and Curaga, Bless and Restoration. I'm pretty sure this is the ONLY fic I've read where it wasn't the case. Although maybe this example is more along the lines of "Timing is key, and Celestia was too distraught to fix herself before it became permanent"
Ninja edit to ninja edit:I don't follow at all. What very little I know of the Kardashians is through the tabloid headlines that catch my eye for 2 seconds as I'm in the checkout line, but I've never seen WHY they are supposedly a big deal.
Or online news articles that are all "YOU SHOULD HEAR WHAT THIS FAMOUS PERSON DID". I suppose I could do research on why she's famous, but that would require me to care.
My point was that the "Celestia rode a chariot" was such a simple answer that it never occurred to me, and if that's the only way she gets around, why would it be news worthy?
7244550 well, that was my point. They have done nothing worthy of being so famous. They are so only because people are stupid and willing to throw money at other people for stories and pictures of what are really unimportant boring people. I was saying, don't blame the paparazzi for their subjects, blame the idjits that make it worth a paparazzo's time by feeding the stupid frenzy their dollars.
And once the feeding frenzy of stupid has begun, everything is newsworthy, because nothing is too stupid to sell :p
I wonder how long it will take Sparky to find out who she is and turn on her, thinking she used black magic to elevate herself up the ranks or some shit.