• Published 3rd Mar 2014
  • 4,582 Views, 46 Comments

Party of Two - scoots2



Cheese Sandwich is thrilled to be throwing a Hearts and Hooves day party with Pinkie Pie, only he'd prefer that it were a party of two.

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Respondez Everypony, Sil Vous Plait

Party of Two


Cheese Sandwich had the definite sense that he was being followed. Scratch that—they were being followed. Half a dozen ponies were tracking him and Pinkie Pie, right down the center street of Ponyville, and it was making him nervous.

“Not that I know a lot about it, Pinkie,” said Cheese, dropping his head so it was on a level with hers and speaking under his breath, “but I thought that Hearts and Hooves Day was something you did with a special somepony and not with a crowd.”

A pair of big blue eyes –so very big, and so very blue—met his, wide with surprise. “Really? Because there was the year I started out spending it just with Gummy, because everypony else had something else to do, and that wasn’t so fun,” she said, as they trotted past Sofas N Quills. “I guess Big Mac and Cheerilee did sorta spend it mostly with a special somepony once, and they wouldn’t stop talking about it, and Mrs. Cake said they wouldn’t even order, but eventually the love poison wore off, only it took Big Mac a long time to pay for all the repairs. And I had fun too that time with Gummy once he decided we should throw a big party and everypony in town decided to come.” She glanced behind her and squeaked, “Oo! Look, Cheesie!”

Half a dozen ponies had become a dozen, and more were gathering behind them as they trotted down the street. Now that she’d noticed them, it was a lost cause. It was going to be a party, whether he liked it or not. The super-duper-iest, pinkest, most perfect party pony of them all was trotting beside him, and he was going to have to share her, because literally everypony in town was her best friend.

It was their own unique kind of magic: a pair of party ponies were always going to have waves of happiness rolling off them, reaching out to everypony they passed, through doors and windows and even through the walls, beckoning them to drop what they were doing and join in the fun. The happier they were, the stronger the magic, and he didn’t know about Pinkie, but he’d been exceptionally happy, right before his plans for the day were scuttled.

Cheese mentally kicked himself. It was his own fault. He’d dropped by Sugarcube Corner very casually, as though he just happened to be passing through, as though he hadn’t made a special trip from Canterlot just to be there. He’d waited around until there were absolutely no customers, scrutinizing every jar of candy in the place as though it were fascinating, and asked if she happened to be doing anything for Hearts and Hooves Day, and if not, did she want to spend it with him, and she’d squeaked and said yes, grabbed a box of cupcakes, and off they went. At the time, he’d congratulated himself on how easy it all was, but now he realized that he should have asked her to be his very special somepony and said that it was, well, a date. He should have spat it out! Something about her turned him back into the tongue-tied colt he’d been so long ago, and he’d rubber-chickened out.

As they rounded Town Hall, Cheese noticed more ponies joining them, and realized that they were all joining two by two. Something about their party pony magic was combining with the magic of Hearts and Hooves Day, making sure everypony had a special somepony and that nopony was alone today. He could tell from the delighted expression on her face and the bounciness of her gait that Pinkie had noticed this, too. Old married couples and young ones; mares, stallions, or both; couples who had been together since forever, couples who hadn’t been couples before Pinkie and Cheese trotted by a few minutes ago, and even a few who were already part of other couples and who had to do a lot of explaining later on were inviting themselves along.

Well, if it was going to be a party after all, he was in the best company for it, wasn’t he? He looked over at Pinkie, her fuchsia mane looking particularly puffy, and if she wasn’t exactly his Pinkie, she was the filly who had made him the party pony he was. She was already wearing a one-pony band suit and beginning the first few bars of a march, and now he was wearing one too, happily trying to outdo her as they oompahed everypony out of town along with them and up a hill to a Hearts and Hooves Day party everypony later agreed was epic. The fondue, punch and cake materialized in a seemingly never ending flow and disappeared almost as quickly; couples danced fast, danced slow, danced until they simply couldn’t dance any more. As the evening wore on, more and more of them made their way off down the hill, smiling and leaning on each other as though in a daze.

Night had fallen long ago, the moon had risen, the party was over, and it was time to put everything away. There was no doubt that he and Pinkie had made so many other ponies happy. It truly had been the best Hearts and Hooves Day ever, thought Cheese, only—if only—

“Pinkie,” he said hesitantly, “is it always going to be like this?”

Pinkie paused midway through making an entire table of goodies go away in the way only he and Pinkie knew how to do, and sat back on her haunches. “Like what?”

“Like this,” Cheese said, waving his hoof around at streamers, balloons, trombones, party hats and the soap bubble maker. “Parties. All the time.”

Pinkie drooped, poking at the ground with one hoof. “Aw,” she said, disappointment crammed into one syllable. “I thought you were enjoying throwing parties with me. I thought you were happy.”

Great. Now I’ve made everything worse. Good job, Cheese. “I did!” he reassured her hastily, dropping a bundle of streamers. “I was! I am! But—but—I wanted to be happy just with you and nopony else.” Hearts and Hooves Day, he thought, and it’s nearly over. Oh, well. It was probably too much to expect.

She trotted over and said shyly, in a quiet voice her friends would barely have recognized, “you mean like this?” She rose up on the very tipmost part of her hooves and kissed him on the cheek.

The very last party guest, on his way down the hill, briefly wondered why there were two pink ponies in the moonlight.

Author's Note:

Evidently, I am not all CheesePie'd out. This was written for a Hearts and Hooves Day contest on DeviantArt, but there can never be too much CheesePie.

Comments ( 46 )

Hmm... I'm a bit weary about reading this story. As the name is awfully close to the name of Part of One. Which I think started the whole 'Cupcakes' thing. *Shutters thinking about it* I haven't read it but from what I heard I don't wanna.

4030540 Actually, Cupcakes came far before Party of One. Plus it's rated E, so it's obviously not a gorefic.:derpyderp2:

But I'm off-topic. I liked this story, myself. I recommend it enthusiastically.

4030675
:derpyderp2::derpyderp1: Huh??? Ooooooh. Your talking about this story not 'Cupcakes'. Yeah... I don't always pay much attention to stuff.

4030694 This honestly has nothing to do with that other fic. It's completely different. I've never written grimdark or gluefic in my life! Anyhoo, I do keep to proper warnings and labeling, so if it's rated E, I guarantee it's an E.
4030675 Thank you! I'm very glad you liked it.

but there can never be too much CheesePie.

Truth.

MORE:flutterrage: Really we need more cheesepie pronto!

This was super sweet!
There needs to be more CheesePie. :raritystarry:

4032657
4032757
Thanks, guys! Well, that's the current plan. I know Equestria Girls isn't everyone's dish, but I thought that I'd try it, just to see if I can. I'm sketching out the details right now and making sure I have a good sense of where I'm going, but teenaged Pinkie and Cheese trying to negotiate a parallel universe strikes me as an interesting fit for a lot of reasons.

4032849 Speaking of EqG, I think I read your post about EqG and shipping in your livejournal I found through your tumblr (and how I found your page here), that got me thinking, if the humanize fanarts gave Hasbro the idea for EqG, then I'm a little bit scared if they do want to put shipping in there as well (heck I'm still hoping for the key givers to appear in the finale)

4032911 I'm almost positive there will be shipping in EG2. As for the main show--it crossed that line with Simple Ways. It may have been mild, and no business may have resulted, but the crushes, etc., seemed like it to me.

Now, I don't know to what extent it'll be involved in the show. It hasn't escaped my notice that three major candidates, Flash Sentry, Soarin', and Cheese, aren't there all the time. It's like Babs in Manehattan. It's enough to know they exist and can be brought in when necessary. As for Equestria Girls--I don't think they can dodge that bullet forever. It might be as mild as the guy they're shown dancing with at the end of the movie. But the magic eight ball says yes, that's what going to happen.

Awww that was so cute! I loved it, especially the ending. :heart: It's a pity that it wasn't more about some romantic stuff between those two but still I enjoyed it so much! You're a very good writer, you know? I hope to read more of your work soon! :pinkiehappy:

4032849
You are on tumblr arent ya? i think thats how i found your swear on Camembert fanfic.i think the name was professor something right?

4037140 Yeppers! Professor Daring Do. I know, I know, but I love Daring, and I figure she's the most likely character actually to be a professor.
4033502 Thank you! Well-- like Cheese, I'm a weeny bit shy, I guess. :pinkiesmile: But hey, I'm working on something. I didn't even know I was going to do this one. I'm sort of developing ideas about how they work as I go along, like the nearly constant radio-like signal that Cheese sends out without really knowing about it. This is why she doesn't have constant abandonment meltdowns about him. That kind of thing. Anyway, I am very glad you liked it and followed from over on Tumblr! I'm kind of spread out all over the place.

4033452 Quite possible now that I think about it, Hasbro wanted it to rival Monster High (or so I heard, from random source a long time ago) Only a few of the characters there have boyfriends, they also get a toy lol but I doubt EqG will go that far, if shipping is going to happen there, I imagine a short cameo of the chosen girls dancing with said boys (like at the end of Canterlot Wedding) At least with Cheese and Soarin I don't think they'll get as much hate as Flash for 'stealing their waifus' :trollestia:

4033452 Or perhaps in the third EqG

OMGOMGOMG this is made of SQUEE! Cute, in character, and your jokes made me grin. Magnificent. I can't praise this enough. :yay:

I will read your other fics for them eventually (also, not big on EQG, but I'm totally down with reading about teen Pinkie and Cheese.) :rainbowkiss:

Oh my gosh! I officially dub you my favourite writer at the moment! This made me giggle, it's so cute! :heart: I cannot WAIT for your future fics! :pinkiehappy:

Please don't ever stop writing! :pinkiehappy: :heart:

4042448 Thank you! I'm actually working on something right now.
4037707 That's kind of what I'm thinking. I don't know if full-out romance would ever happen in the main show, and honestly, I'd rather it didn't. With Equestria Girls, that ship has sailed. (Ba-dump-BSSH!) So I think we're probably looking at background cameos or dancing or something like that.
4040718 Teen Pinkie and Cheese--well, we'll see whether you like them or not, but it's definitely something I'm picking at right now.

*bows down* I am not worthy to write fluff anymore 'cause you aced it, my dear.

4066348 A girl could retire on a compliment like that. Unluckily, fluff's practically all I can do. You'll notice a disappointing lack of aliens and tentacles. But thanks!

What if Pinkie Pie introduced her boyfriend Cheese Sandwich to her parents?

4069074 We'll probably know more about her relationship with her family after Saturday, but here's the real $64,000 question: is he? If he can't spit it out for just Hearts and Hooves Day, how's he going to manage it for something more permanent? Does she actually get it? Does she understand what a boyfriend is? Pinkie probably understands everything important about this anyway. Maybe. I don't know if it would even occur to her to make any kind of special announcement, but if it came up, it would be about as tactful as yelling that this donkey is seriously bald. Like, she might mention that they had triplets last week when she invites everypony to the weekaversary party, but kind of leave out the bit about how they got married last year. :facehoof: But they aren't anywhere near that bit, and who knows if they'll ever get there. They're very young and very goofy.

4070573
Pinkie might lose track of what's important, but Cheese is going to be compelled to throw the craziest wedding party ever. Unless he's so nervous and terrified that even Cheesy Sense can't make him plan for that. :rainbowlaugh:

Pinkie Pie: Don't worry! I've planned a wedding before! It's easy-peasy-weasy! :yay:
Cheese Sandwich: You-You have? Phew! *wipes sweat off his brow* :ajsleepy:
Pinkie Pie: Yup! Hopefully this one won't get invaded. By changelings. :pinkiecrazy:
Cheese Sandwich: ...Invaded? :twilightoops:
Pinkie Pie: *shoves her face up against his, staring* Don't worry! I'll keep you safe! No one will capture you and pretend to be you and try to take over all of Equestria or just Ponyville. Not on my watch! :rainbowdetermined2:
Cheese Sandwich: *gulps* Oh. *understood enough to faint, ala Mr. Cake* :applejackconfused:
Rainbow Dash: What about that time you couldn't guard the MMMM? :rainbowkiss:
Pinkie Pie: :rainbowhuh: :pinkiegasp:
*grabs Cheese by the shirt and shakes him* I won't fail you! :flutterrage: I love you. :fluttershysad:
Cheese Sandwich: *still unconscious* :derpytongue2:
Rainbow Dash: *puts her hooves to her ears and cringes* Ow... great. Now I'm deaf. :ajbemused:

4089622 Hey! He was ready to plan a wedding, too! He did his bit! It's not his fault that Braeburn fell in love with a cougar by mail!
===>>> still totally does not get what exactly was wrong with Cherry Jubilee, who is rounded and even kind of pink in bits.

Thing is, do party ponies plan their own parties? Pinkie didn't even bother throwing her own birthday party. Maybe it wasn't just that she forgot. Maybe it's the one thing that doesn't show up on the radar, since it's about making other ponies smile.

Oh, Cheese may basically understand how she thinks, and she might be the one pony he totally gets, but that doesn't mean that he necessarily knows about all the stuff she's been up to. The idea of twenty Pinkie Pies, in particular, would probably make him crash to desktop for all kinds of reasons. :pinkiehappy:

4089786

Hey! He was ready to plan a wedding, too! He did his bit! It's not his fault that Braeburn fell in love with a cougar by mail!

===>>> still totally does not get what exactly was wrong with Cherry Jubilee, who is rounded and even kind of pink in bits.

Cheese: *helping Brae's unsteady and heavily salted butt home by shoving him* :ajbemused:
Braeburn: ... I'm sorry. :applecry:
Cheese: Why are you telling me that? :twilightsheepish:
Braeburn: Yer bein' nice and all. I appreciate it, after I had to call off the weddin' and you came all this way...
Cheese: ... :trixieshiftleft: :trixieshiftright: *stops pushing... begins to laugh* Do you even know what love is? :twilightsheepish:
Braeburn: I think so... :unsuresweetie:
*long awkward pause: Cheese waiting for Brae to get the idea of what he did wrong but Brae just keeps staring at him until he thinks Cheese is trying to boost his confidence*
Braeburn: ... Yeah, I do. :trollestia:
Cheese: You... :facehoof: ... Don't lie to me. :ajbemused:
Braeburn: :rainbowhuh: Then why did you ask? :twilightangry2:
Cheese: Ha ha I was hoping you'd prove me wrong. Ahhhh, I need more sarsaparilla. :pinkiecrazy:

Thing is, do party ponies plan their own parties? Pinkie didn't even bother throwing her own birthday party. Maybe it wasn't just that she forgot. Maybe it's the one thing that doesn't show up on the radar, since it's about making other ponies smile.

Ohhhh... that's a good point! What if Pinkie helps remember all of these occasions with the help of her Pinkie Sense? She has photographic memory but the Pinkie Sense is what gives her the nudge.

Yeah. That makes perfect sense. Awww... that means Cheese probably hasn't had a birthday party of his own in a long time.

:pinkiegasp: Pinkie should throw him a party! Bwahahaha... best idea ever. :pinkiehappy:

What if a party pony just fizzles if they try to plan their own party? Like, it's technically possible, but it's so hard that they might as well give up?

Oh, Cheese may basically understand how she thinks, and she might be the one pony he totally gets, but that doesn't mean that he necessarily knows about all the stuff she's been up to. The idea of twenty Pinkie Pies, in particular, would probably make him crash to desktop for all kinds of reasons. :pinkiehappy:

Yeah, I have it in my head that he only knows the Smile song because it was hilarious and at that time he was in Ponyville, where it had happened. But otherwise he may have only heard of her exploits and not necessarily known she had anything to do with them, if he's heard of them at all. It seems as if Equestria doesn't really know who any of them are in general, other than maaaybe Twilight. But Princesses are normal so you just mostly react like they're any other pony because if they're just talking to you like it's normal then it's normal.

Ponies detect normal. :trollestia:

As for the twenty Pinkie Pies... yes he would. One of which being his imagination gets carried away: he imagines all twenty of them fighting over him, and he crashes because that is a combination of greatest fear ever and best fantasy ever. Also made of major WTF. :pinkiecrazy:

Yeah, you know what? Maybe I'm crazy, but I think he'd actually be horrified if he ever ended up in a genuine love triangle or dodecahedron. He loves attention but he wouldn't want to make so many ponies unhappy because of it. He would be really upset. I think he may be somewhat oblivious in certain areas, but I'm pretty sure he'd recognize the signs of discontent, and depending on what sort of set-up it was, he'd eventually try running away from the problem entirely or be really insistent about not being put in such an awkward position, even if it hurt their feelings... but then he'd try to cheer them up and it would get worse. Possibly hilarious.

And well, I don't think he has Pinkie's emotional juggling skills. She's the only one I could see potentially working a true multiple romance and keeping everyone happy. Like, Pinkie could probably marry more than one pony (ignoring legality at the moment) and make it work. Well, plausibly. That's not a definite. But she's the only one I would ever be able to believe that reasonably could, without the author having to put in the effort for me to buy it. I'm not saying it would be perfect, because it wouldn't, but she could juggle it and she might not have jealousy in that regard, though that isn't at all certain. :trixieshiftright:

You give me so many ideas... I need to dedicate myself to writing some of them but waaaugh... I have too many ideas and WIP as it is. FML. :raritydespair:

4089786
Forgot to add, I bet Cheese loves the Smile song and hums it to himself sometimes. I think he had the whole thing memorized after he left Ponyville. I refuse to accept anything less. :trollestia:

Even if technically they don't sing all of these songs and most of them are "musical logic", I'm pretty sure party ponies go beyond that. Even if he isn't entirely aware of where it came from, Cheese clearly knows that it exists, as does Pinkie, and that's all they need for it to be real. :yay:

It's like when you remember a dream and never forget it, those rare ones that stick with you. I'm betting that's what it was like for Cheese. It just came to him, like he'd always known it, and he had a fuzzy memory of what it was about, but he caught the lyrics and now they'll always be with him, as long as he is trying to keep them safe and sound in his heart. :raritystarry:

Random Tangent Time! I've seen a handful of stories where Pinkie dies and Cheese is sad or has to plan her funeral. What if he has to plan her wedding to someone else? I think that's a much, much better tearjerker but I don't think I've seen that yet. :unsuresweetie:

Thing with emoticons -- I'm confused.
Who said anything about fighting over him? Hey, every single one of them is only trying to 1) have fun and 2) make you smile.
Cheese is kind of cruddy at friendship. This is why Pinkie is good for him, even as a distant influence.
4091083 Well, of course, I did the funeral thing, but slightly differently. Should I avoid spoilers in the comments? Not sure. Thing is, I don't know why she'd be getting married, or to whom. They've already got the basics for conflict in that he has to go back to Ponyville for a recharge once in a while, whether he likes it or not, whether she likes it or not. Mix that with overwhelming Cheesy Sense that a big party was in the offing, and you'd have the recipe for a disaster (and maybe the ending of The Graduate.)

Still, I think if I were to try it out, it would be better to do something less obvious, because if you're down, nothing is worse than someone else's wedding, especially when your ex is there. Plus, the way I write Cheesy Sense, all he knows is that there is a party, not necessarily whose or what kind.

4091212

Thing with emoticons -- I'm confused.

Oh. Never mind. It was dumb anyways. :twilightblush:

Who said anything about fighting over him? Hey, every single one of them is only trying to 1) have fun and 2) make you smile.

Yes and Cheese is hands down the most fun pony, no matter where he goes, if he does say so himself. They're all barraging him with attempts to be funny and fun and because they're not perfect clones, they're a lot more selfish than Pinkie normally is. So they're not paying any real attention to the other clones unless they get bored, they're all trying to pay attention to Cheese. And they aren't actually concerned with his feelings, just their own. If he's faking a smile, they count that as a win. If he starts to frown, they start trying harder to make him smile. All of them. At once.

Cheese wants Pinkie to pay attention to him and delight him, but I honestly think that too much focused attention like that is going to terrify him. It's different when its him dazzling the townspeople of a given town. They're just in awe of him and he eats up their admiration and anticipation for the best party ever. Plus they're really admiring his work, not him in the strictest sense.

Twenty Pinkie clones will be demanding that he entertain them and determined to directly interact with him for as much intense fun as possible. That is going to freak him out eventually, even if they're just trying to get him to juggle with them for a giant juggling circle. And even if it wasn't him imagining that happening, where basically an amazing situation turns horrible, I'm pretty sure that is what would happen. They'd drive him up the wall. Too much of a good thing. :pinkiecrazy:

They may also want to hug him a lot, which could also contribute to crushing him by accident... Which wouldn't kill him but it would be uncomfortable. I think he'd panic and he'd be running like his tail was on fire after awhile. :rainbowlaugh:

Cheese is kind of cruddy at friendship. This is why Pinkie is good for him, even as a distant influence.

This is very true. :trollestia:

Well, of course, I did the funeral thing, but slightly differently. Should I avoid spoilers in the comments? Not sure.

Your story was more realistic and less melodramatic, which is why it is my favorite revolving around that idea so far. :twilightsheepish:

Thing is, I don't know why she'd be getting married, or to whom. They've already got the basics for conflict in that he has to go back to Ponyville for a recharge once in a while, whether he likes it or not, whether she likes it or not.

Sorry, I wasn't really suggesting within your story universe. It was more of a general thought. I know they have plenty of potential for conflict in general, I'm just kind of surprised other people all thought of the funeral but not the wedding? But maybe I'm a dummy. I wasn't necessarily saying it was the best idea ever, since I also have no idea who she'd necessarily be marrying, but it is kind of an interesting idea. :twilightsheepish:

Mix that with overwhelming Cheesy Sense that a big party was in the offing, and you'd have the recipe for a disaster (and maybe the ending of The Graduate.)

... Yes. Maybe. Eh, sorry I brought it up. I knew it was convoluted but it was oddly fascinating. :duck:

Still, I think if I were to try it out, it would be better to do something less obvious, because if you're down, nothing is worse than someone else's wedding, especially when your ex is there. Plus, the way I write Cheesy Sense, all he knows is that there is a party, not necessarily whose or what kind.

Yeah, but he'd find out once he got there. Regardless, it would indeed be insanely sad. It might even be worthy of the tragedy tag.

I swear I'm not trying to pull them apart unnecessarily. I just imagine what sort of horrible things could happen. But I love them because they are mostly warm fuzzies together. :twilightblush:

4091212 I AM MOST DEFINITELY NOT "CRUDDY" AT FRIENDSHIP!!:flutterrage:

4089622 RD is death.. Reminds me of her astigmatism from FiW lol!:rainbowlaugh:

4069074 Oh colt, I might be killed.:twilightoops:

I dunno if I should read this... the comments and description suggest two things I hate, shipping and Cheese Sandwich. :ajbemused:

4451952 Well, then, don't, because you definitely won't like it. You can see what the story is about and who is in it from the tags and the description. That is what they are for. See where it says "Romance," and "Cheese Sandwich?" That strongly suggests that it may be a shipping story with Cheese Sandwich in it.

4452076 .... Sorry, I'm stupid. :ajsleepy: I should have read the tags, but the title was so close to my favorite episode with my favorite pony (:pinkiecrazy:)

4452240 I see. Well, there you are. I try to be very careful about tags, because I really don't want readers to be disappointed or to wind up reading something they didn't want to read. I don't even sneak in stealth ships--I think it's cheating.

This was wicked cute and pretty much exactly how a CheesePie romance should go. :) Also, I really dig "rubber-chickened out"--that was an especially nice touch.

5451634 Thank you very much!

Hmm... I'm usually not all that picky about spelling... but I have my critics, too, particularly when I use French (or Prench in the equine realm) and misspell it.

I noticed a teeny tiny mark missing from the title: "Respondez Everypony, S'il Vous Plait" (the Sil needs a S'il.)

Nothing to feel bad about. I usually have to cross-reference with Google or Wikipedia, before I get it right.

Have downloaded story. Will read tonight.

6267682 It's intentional, actually. PInkie's Prench is lousy. "Everypony" isn't right, either. Technically, it should be "Respondez, s'il vous plâit," but you'll never see that.

My OTP chamber has been blown up by CheesePie bombs.

I wuv dis story <3 Good job!

I just got here from Keyframe's reading of this fic. So worth it! :twilightsmile:

6960389 Thank you! I didn't even know about it until Sketch-AHolic told me about it. (She writes some pretty mean CheesePie herself).

PresentPerfect
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I don't ship it, but that was cute.

Well, that was adorable :pinkiecrazy:

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