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My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic Fanfiction
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well they're fucked
Wooh! Swift's in the story now. And I honestly don't care that she's a bitch, because she can be.
Nice little fight scene at the end too. So at least we now know he can... maybe not control it, but he has an idea of what to do for the berserker power to work with him.
And 12k words. Not a bad update at all after the wait from the last chapter.
4155852
What did you think of Malideus Unhallowed, pray tell?
Too overpowered? Too stereotypical?
pocket sand is best god
4155860 Considering it ended in a tie... sorta... Meh, he's fine. If he somehow managed to decimate Celestia then teabag her corpse, THEN it would be overpowered. As it is right now, he seems good.
Also, forgot to mention it in my previous comments, but I am loving the Dark Souls references. I'm pretty much sitting here laughing quietly as I read them. Though I kinda wish he did try the Giantdad. That would've been a fight to see. Nathan vs. Giantdad.
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Giantdad will receive screen time.
It is written, it shall be so. Praise the sun!
4155901 Praise it indeed, but not Celestia's sun. We praise Gwynn's sun.
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Right, I keep forgetting to specify.
Pocket sand ... FUCK YEAH
I just spent like 3 hours reading this
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Well...
4155860 a thought of scyther dipped in tar and given a suit of armor ... preety badass
4155964 pcoket sand ... malidious one true ally who doesn't try to rape him ... I hope
Break the tip of both Celestia & Luna's horns to siphon their energy slightly and slowly or
Mark them with a one way double-edge curse where if he gets hurt, they get hurt but if they get hurt he gets more energy from them!
OP but makes them think HARD and stops them from killing/imprisoning him for a for a long time
^This
Also, Mal's Demon form or whatever it is was pretty damn cool.
Alright, your DkS reference with the "Illusory wall ahead. Amazing chest ahead" was great.
Oh, and Illusionary wasn't the right term :3
...but a miserable pile of secrets?
Great chapter as always, but You-know-who has yet to arrive. A being that is known as the Judge, the Jury and the Exicutioner to many. Any creature that slays all who have slain important people or have just killed thousands. He is known as the Stalker. And Malidues is a VERY high target. Watch out for flickering lights, because YOU. ARE. NEXT.
"summon giantdad"
..........ALL OF MY YES!
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So this fic is between a ponyhater and brony fight XD!!! Im pretty sure that nathan and chris will know about the other soon
Lemme see if I have this right...Nathan, this guy is Chris's friend, a kind of opposite to him. WHY WAS THERE NOT MORE OF A FOCUS ON HIM? He's relatable, admirable and nice. He's a good foil to Chris. You should have devoted more time to him and less time to Chris SOMEHOW through constant Deus ex machinas getting out of trouble and just by HAPPENSTANCE running into people who have everything he needs. That's bad writing. Also, how did he transform? That comes out of nowhere. That kind of thing has to be built up over time, HINTED at! And how can he just WILL the staff back to him when Celestia was holding onto him? This story is so poorly written, the scenarios so forced, so unrealistic, it's utterly unsatisfying! This isn't me being mad that is pissing on the source material, this is me being mad that it's failing at the basics of storytelling: MAKING. SENSE. AND NOT. BEING. CONTRIVED.
Okay a few things, if he DOES summon giantdad Celestia is just..... fucked, he will just rek everyone and their nans (being serious though all my yes for the summon giantdad) and pocket sand is best god and best ally
Mal should summon Giantdad to cover his escape
"He sucks at unarmed combat"
But a few chapters ago he was using mma moves yo trash both princesses fairly easily...
Power levels fluctuate soooooo much in this fic.
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He never GETS his staff back. And his transformation WAS hinted at before. And don't worry, Nathan will get his screen time, just be patient.
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Close quarters, not unarmed.
There's a difference.
Wow! Interesting chapter indeed, a lot was going on.
I have a question, though; will Mal ever delve into necromancy and/or prolong his life by becoming a Wraith or Lich? He's used some deliciously evil spells and incantations, but I thing a truly evil, jack-of-all-trades wizard would use necromancy from time to time.
Even though, with or without, he will be the evil wizard we all know and love
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Oh, it said SPEAR. Nevermind.
ci-cdn.23bits.com/107/163/ci-120801210344-960.jpg
media.wizards.com/images/magic/daily/stf/stf142_surgery.jpg
Jin-Gitaxias, Core Augur
Role: Jix-Gitaxias is the praetor of the blue-aligned Phyrexian faction, the Progress Engine. He serves as the brilliant mastermind behind the sociopathic experiments of the so-called Great Synthesis.
Appearance: Hunched and barbed, Jin-Gitaxias is covered in the chromelike metals common to Phyrexians of the Progress Engine. Jin-Gitaxias can communicate in a variety of modes and languages, including mental speech, which he uses to drill his ideals of perfection into the minds of others. As part of Jin-Gitaxias's optimized homeostasis, his ribs and spinal pillar flex and pulse disturbingly.
Motif: Experiment.
Agenda: Jin-Gitaxias seeks the perfection of all life through the most perfect of methods: clinical experimentation. Of all the praetors, Jin-Gitaxias is the most concerned with converting the face of the world formerly known as Mirrodin to its Phyrexian ideal, from the smallest organism to the greatest sea. Jin-Gitaxias is a living storehouse of research data, collated from every tidbit of vicious exploration conducted throughout the plane.
------
Too similar to be a coincidence. But I'm unsure if I should call it out as a reference...
You don't make fun of Dark Souls, Dark Souls makes fun of you. The Pursuer, The Lost Sinner, and the horde of Belfry Gargoyles make sure of that. But should you continue, be sure to put a mimic in there somewhere. Nothing more terrifying than thinking you're about to receive a great treasure and instead get your face eaten by the stuff of nightmares.
what happened to the bet between Malideus and Luna? seriously Malideus won but everyone in the story kind of seems like they've forgotten of it
might be just my opinion but IDK
kind of want to know more about him but if I dont need to then fine
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Maybe not. After all, he hates the undead.
Chris should for real kill luna celestia deserves to suffer for her trickery pls make it happen.
i guess malideus will start warring with all races now, just to up the challenge.
Also, he'll be pissed when he finds out that Celestia decieved Nathan and goaded the former friends into killing each other.
And that, kids, is why we do not steal/betray all powerful pimp wizards.
Surprise, bitch.
cloud-2.steampowered.com/ugc/594759049889824463/13447D757B4854BB3991620A4E8CB296391B76AF/
I'm kind of disappointed as to how you handled Chamentia, honestly: He was supposed to spout crazy ramblings that just-so-happen to be references... and he was supposed to reference more than just Dark Souls. Also, he was supposed to hint at the 4th wall, not shatter it... and it seems you just plain got rid of all the discordian stuff. Not to mention you didn't even use any of the sample jokes I sent you (except 1, and it was just a minor one), despite saying they were hilarious...
I know this is your story, and it's your choice how to use the characters, but I still wish Chamentia stayed the crazy horny delusional hobo he was supposed to be...
Great chapter ^^ moa!~~~ I love it!
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Overpowered? Nah. Powerful but with weakneses, as Celestia displayed.
Stereotypical? Anyone else thought about Bloodthirster of Khorne when Malideus transformed? But I'm still ok with that. We all love giant Demon-beast-thingies, and yours is awesome.
Praise our lord and master Pocket Sand!
4157740 He can't use powerful or combat magic, I'd say, but stimple stuff like that wouldn't be too much of a bother as long as he doesn't constantly do it. Remember that while he stole most of his magic off of others, he's also become accustomed to magic... and Equestria is a place full of ambient magic that his body and reserves have probably been tapping into a little... perhaps he has a little bit of his own magic.
After all, he's a wizard, Harry.
"WHAT HAVE YOU DONE, BOY!? YOU COWARD! YOU FOOL! THERE'LL BE A RECKONING YET, CHRIS! A RECKONING IN BLOOD!!!"
I feel that this MIGHT be from dark messiah.
So THAT'S what happened to the demon he tried summoning about a dozen or so chapters back.....
And the Narrator being Malideous' inner voice... Called it!
Looking forward to the next chapter.
Post Script: Nathan is truly an idiot.....
So.... still waiting for my OC to show up.....
I have converted many to the church of Pocket Sand this day.
Twas worth it.
So what is a man?
ohhh...
so that's where the death-dealer went...
o-o
All hail pocket sand!
god of desperation and acute eye pain!
surprise butt sex princesses
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all hail:
socksonanoctopus.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/11/rusty2.jpg
This is one of the better chapters in my opinion, though they are all great, it's that this one adds more too the story and keeps the reader guessing, good job!
~OreoKookie
Lets just hope maildeus doesn't become the good guy after that
Well, let's see how Nathan'll react to this when he gets there